why the fuck not me?

The whole airplane rule of "put your oxygen mask on first, then help the person next to you" is a great metaphor for life. RP only.

[kalingnotkapoor]

ditzyxdaisy·:

I know exactly how you feel. It was the same for me when I presented at the Oscars in 2016. I thought I was dreaming. Nice to meet you Mindy! I’m Daisy.

Hey, Daisy! No introduction required. Not only are you a Star Wars legend, but I interviewed for The Force Awakens press a few years ago. Carrie FIsher was there, too, it was life changing for me.

[kalingnotkapoor]

haderhq·:

Hit me with your best deepest, darkest Bill secret.

Bill Hader... pours the milk in before the cereal.

[kalingnotkapoor]

hqmichalkas·:

That has to be the coolest full circle moment. You deserve the massive ego, though, you’ve worked hard to be where you are and you deserve every success you have, that includes presenting at the Oscars. I’m sure your daughter will be so proud of you when she realizes all the good and super cool things you’ve done. I’m AJ. Which romantic comedies are your favorite?

You are much too sweet, I’m going to lap up all of your compliments – don’t mind me. There are also a lot of embarrassing things that she totally might resent me for, but hopefully she focuses on the good stuff. Hopefully. Hi AJ! Oh, no, you’re going to regret asking that question. I’m so into rom coms that I write my own – but it has to be the OG Nora Ephron trio: Sleepless in Seattle, When Harry Met Sally and You’ve Got Mail. Just don’t ask me which I like better. I have an existential crisis over that on the regular.

[kalingnotkapoor]

haderhq·:

Let’s hope it’s the career that’s successful, am I right? Oh, y’know, just working on the third season, casting everyone but you. I’m afraid I’ll have to return the ‘having my friend on my show’ favor eventually.

Yeah, Kit will be fine without me. Let the village raise her, as they say. Or... whatever they say. If you don’t cast me, I will tell everyone all of your deepest, darkest secrets. I mean, I don’t know any, but I’m a writer. I’ll make them up.

[kalingnotkapoor]

haderhq·:

You’re probably not far off from the truth. That’s what I thought, you’re welcome. What in the world have you been up to besides that? It’s been a while.

I’m hilarious and understand memes, they love me. I’m a little hurt that you haven’t been stalking me and my whereabouts incessantly, but I’ve mostly been writing and raising a child. I’m hoping at least one of them will be a success. What about you? By which I mean: why have I never been on Barry?

[kalingnotkapoor]

itsmazzmurray·:

Maybe, but I really can’t see it happening. The show is Mamma Mia. When it first opened in London, I went for the part of Sophie. I didn’t get it. But then about 5 years ago, I got the part of Tanya and was there for a year. Then last June, I came back to the show again as Donna.

Oh, I love Mamma Mia, but I feel like everybody loves Mamma Mia? It’s very loveable. The movie was one of my favorite new romcoms and I was so excited when it hit Broadway. Nice work! Donna’s a badass.

[kalingnotkapoor]

haderhq·:

Don’t get your hopes up too hard, all my kids rolled their eyes at me presenting at the Emmys and weren’t even that impressed with the Emmy I won. They can be brutal. I liked the gown, though. And the speech. 10/10.

That’s because your kids take after their favorite person: me. Hey, hey, hey, let’s not get into who has and hasn’t won an Emmy over who. Thank you, though, obviously yours is the only validation I seek and I will hold it close to my heart.

[kalingnotkapoor]

thejoejcnas·:

That’s a good way to put it. Predicting the future is also really cool. That dress was iconic. Not everyone can pull off yellow either. Is the week finally slowing down for you? Yo, I’m Joe. I’m sure you get this a lot but The Office is a classic. 

I’m not sure it’s so much predicting the future as it is is... being incredibly full of myself, but thank you! I love bright colors and if I can pull them off on the red carpet then I (my stylist, actually) have done my (her) job. It’s a little less chaotic, but I’m a single mom to a two year old so it never really ends. Thank you so much! You’re one of my top three favorite Jonas Brothers, for what it’s worth.

[kalingnotkapoor]

itsmazzmurray·:

I think if someone told me when I was younger I would present an Oscar, or even go there, I will laugh. Only because it still hasn’t happened. And I am pretty sure it won’t. In my case, I think it would be if anyone had told me twenty years ago that the show I went for an audition for twenty years ago, and didn’t get the role because I wasn’t right for it, would end up wanting me working on it twice. Each time as different characters. I wouldn’t have believed that. It is great to meet you, Mindy. I’m Mazz.

Trust me, if it can happen to the weird, nerdy, Indian-American kid from Cambridge, MA, it can happen to you. That’s such a cool story, though, you should be seriously proud. I’m super curious to know what the show is, though, and what the different characters were? Were they total opposites? It’s awesome to meet you!

[kalingnotkapoor]

itstommyh·:

Congratulations! That must be quite an experience, presenting at such a prestigious event. Maybe when she’s older, bright yellow gowns will be what everybody wants to wear, and she’ll appreciate you being so bold, and pulling it off. Hello, I’m Tom - I love romantic comedies, and love going for an early morning run along the beach. 

Whoa. Hey. No introduction required, sir. I am a huge fan, and pretty sure I referenced you on at least one of my shows. I appreciate your optimism regarding my daughter! I always admired my mother’s fashion sense so maybe, just maybe, history will repeat itself. As for the runs, you’re on your own with them.

[bruce-slutsteen]

[kalingnotkapoor]

@haderhq

[kalingnotkapoor]

hqlail·:

I hope it’s never too late because I’d be more than happy to drop this off for you. All Broadway stars, off or on, should receive the star treatment.

I barely know you and you’re already my favorite person. Question: will the cocoa feature those cute little marshmallows? I feel like they’re important. 

[kalingnotkapoor]

hqtroianavery·:

I loved the gown, it looked so beautiful on you. It complimented you beautifully! I hope you had a good time at The Oscars, I always love getting together to watch it with friends and good snacks. 

Oh, thank you! You’re way too nice, you could never be one of those people that writes op-eds on red carpet fashion. Some people are vicious. I had an amazing time! I’ll admit, I kinda miss watching it at home in my jammies but it was really cool to get up there. Spoiler alert: it helps to have snacks in your purse. I had a lot of gummy worms and Chex mix.

[kalingnotkapoor]

If you had told my preteen self, sitting in front of the TV when I should have been doing my homework but watching the Oscars instead, that she’d grow up to present at said Oscars I... honestly, probably would have believed you because I had a wild imagination and kind of a lowkey massive ego that wouldn’t be properly unleashed until my early thirties. It’s been a weird week, but the best week? I hope that my daughter looks back with pride and doesn’t roll her eyes at that bright yellow gown too hard. Anyway, I’m Mindy. I love romantic comedies and hate long walks on the beach or... anywhere. What’s up? @hollywoodland-hqs​

[kalingnotkapoor]

benedictcumberbatchworld·:

I got asked today i don’t know how many times about sherlock coming back i had to bring the kids to their moms and of course i get stopped 5 times asking the same thing ugh, I’m Benedict or Ben in case you don’t know who i am.

@hwlstart·

Isn’t it flattering, though? I mean, I get asked about The Office on the daily and I’ve made three shows since but it still means the world that people are that passionate about something I had a part in! Hey Benedict, I’m Mindy, big fan.

[kalingnotkapoor]

hqlail·:

You know how there’s terms like puck bunny for women who are interested in hockey players, and jersey chasers for football and apparently..lacrossestitues for lacrosse players? I need there to be a name for women who hang outside Broadway’s doors and try to hit on all the dashing musical theater men. I want to make them shirts and buttons and give them soup and hot cocoa. It’s cold out here in the Big Apple! They’re fighting the great fight! And I want a shirt myself, because I feel like I’ve joined the ranks of Broadway groupies. @hollywoodland-hqs·

I need to know why no one was bringing me shirts and buttons and soup and hot cocoa when I was doing off-Broadway in the early ‘00s. Is that because it was off-Broadway? Rude.

[humorblr]