Legacy
Mary had a little plot of land on a mountain
For over a year she kept you on her window sill.
Johnny- sorry- John Dale now-
Despite not knowing you for most of his life-
Was the only man left of the four families
(Seeing as your namesake was disowned)
So he was in charge.
Neither of them managed to finish the paperwork
To turn you into a tree-
Your ashes i mean-
So.
A week before I left to move
Across the country
I drove 5 hours to a shit box Oklahoma ghost town
And then drove my compact car up the side
Of Mary’s stupid fucking mountain
To finally bury you
A year and a half after you died.
She had gotten “government grade growth hormone,”
And some grandchild
To dig up rocks on the plot of land across from hers.
They poured you into a compostable pot-
“Don’t breath in Dad”
And half drunk,
Mary’s stupid kid David, dug a hole
And then dug out a sprite from a few paces away,
And they made do.
Mary covered the roots in the powder
The hormone, not your ashes,
And they all stood around and said sweet,
gentle things
Meaningless
How good a man you were
How noble.
How brave.
And I stood there
Facing Kansas
Turned away from God
Looking at these stupid fucks crying over
A made up man
And felt a scream trapped in my throat-
To see them mourn for you
Like you didn’t just succeed
In abandoning all of us
Again
You left every family
You left every child
You never paid child support
You beat half your children
You baptized the rest
And we lived in fear that we would be discarded
Like the last family-
Or the one before that,
Or the one before that,
Or the one before that.
We were good
We got straight A’s
We never told mom
Or concerned family members
We kept your little secret
We begged for your attention
We brought you scotch
We did your chores
And loved your wives
We took your place as parent-caretaker-lover-husband
We took care of you
And after all of that
The children that managed to make it
To Bumfuck Mountain, Oklahoma
Fucking thanked you for it
You always said you wanted to leave a legacy.
I guess you did.
1:59am 4/8/2022














