Flowers by Lauren Spencer Smith
*AU where Avengers are federal agents working at SHIELD. This one shot may have a part 2 if people want one. Would people be interested in me continuing this AU into a longer work?
Summary: You have been dating John Walk for 3 years and you’ve been with him through it all, the good, the bad, and the abusive. A night out of drinking at a bar called the Avengers Sam Wilson starts to notice some concerning behaviors.
Warnings: drinking, abuse, domestic violence, bruises, non-consensual sex, mention of death, cheating.
After working 12 hour shifts at the hospital, being at the local bar, the Avengers, with your boyfriend was not on your list. You rather be cocooned in blankets in your bed watching TV but you were sipping on a club soda as John threw back another shot. Dating John Walker for 3 years was a…challenge. You were with him through his deployment, his discharge from the military, his journey into the academy, and his employment as a lower level field agent. There were good moments; when he got a promotion as team lead, solving a cold case that went unsolved for 5 years, and meeting the president as he received a congressional medal of bravery. But there were bad moments, John has a drinking problem. According to him, his father was worse which scared you because he was bad. He wasn’t violent (at first) but he was degrading; constantly bringing your self-esteem down. If it wasn’t for your best friend Lemar Haskins, who became close to John when they met, to pick up the pieces you would have left him sooner. Then Lemar and John were given the Flag Smasher case, a group of radicalized thinkers, that were setting bombs across NYC and DC to further their political agenda. They weren’t making much headway until Sam and Bucky joined them. But then Lemar was killed and John did not handle it well. He used an unnecessary amount of force arresting a man that was part of the Flag Smasher resulting in his death. He was removed from the case and suspended until an internal investigation was completed. Sam took his position as a team lead. John’s a mess, a mess you couldn’t leave. He’s your mess. A mess that now left you covered in bruises and kisses as he hit you. A mess that would drunkenly scream at you then hold you close at night saying, ‘I love you.’ A mess that had a vice grip on your neck that every time you threatened to walk away, he promised he would change.
I love you. I need you. Please don’t go. I can’t lose anyone else.
No one will love you like I will. It was your fault. You made me do it.
Sam likes to pride himself in being a good judge of character and giving the people the benefit of the doubt. When he was passed for the promotion by Walker for team lead when his best friend Steve retired. He bit his tongue while Bucky, Natasha, and Clint raised hell. When Walker replaced Rhodney with Haskins he bit his tongue. It was when Walker’s task force was calling the Flag Smasher a terrorist group, Haskins was killed, and Walker was benched - Sam got involved. The case was done, the Flag Smashers were arrested and now the entire department was out celebrating a win. But Sam wasn’t listening to the table filled with his coworkers, people he considered his family. He thinks they are talking about everything they are going to do with all the free time. Sam almost laughed as the newly appointed team lead; he’s going to be lucky if he’s in the inside of his apartment again. He put his beer to his lips and watched you. You were sitting at a table with Walker, Rumlow, and Rollins. Your eyes were glued to the drink in front of you, stirring it. Sam had only said a handful of words to you every time his path crossed yours at Avengers, most of the time Walker had you tucked away underneath his arm. But Sam couldn’t stop thinking about you. When you smiled, it made your nose crinkle. Your eyes seemed to glow underneath the lights of the bar. He made you laugh, a simple jab at Bucky, but the sound replayed in his head. Tonight, something was off. When Walker laughed too loud, you flinched. When Rollins brought another round over you hid your displeasure well. But when you tried to leave the table, Walker raised his hand and you flinched again. Sam’s grip on his beer tightened. He watched as Walker placed a piece of hair that came undo from your braid behind your ear and kissed you, whispering something in your ear. Whatever he said you blushed and bit your lip. You left the table and headed towards the restroom, Walker intensely staring at your back.
‘I’m gonna head to the bathroom.’ Sam quickly said, following your path.
You stared at your reflection in the bathroom mirror. For a bar, the bathroom was surprisingly clean; the only sound was the running water of the sink. You splashed cold water against your face, making you shiver. Stupid you were stupid. It had been a long day at work plus dealing with John at home so when his voice got a little loud or when he reached for your face you couldn’t help but flinch away. All night you noticed Sam watching you and if he saw, he would ask questions and questions would lead to lies. Lying to your coworkers and friends was easy; they weren’t trained professionals to detect if someone lied. You dried your face off with a sigh and left the bathroom, almost running into the man you wanted to avoid. Sam Wilson.
‘Sam, I am so sorry. I didn’t expect the door to open.’ Sam laughed, shaking his head.
‘It’s alright, sunflower.’ You smiled at the nickname. You wore a white dress with a sunflower on it your first time at the Avengers. The nickname stuck, everyone called you it. John hated the nickname. ‘How are you? How’s work?’ You fought back a groan, ignoring the ache in your feet.
‘Busy. I’ve been pulling 12 hour shifts for the past 2 weeks at the hospital.’ Sam’s mouth hung open at your statement.
‘Why the hell are you here? I would be dead on my feet.’
‘Trust me I am.’ You sighed. ‘John wanted to see everyone so here I am.’ You swore you saw Sam’s eyes roll but you weren’t sure.
‘Let me buy you a drink as a thank you for all you do.’
‘Shouldn’t I be buying you one?’ You asked with a chuckle, feeling your stomach twist with anxiety ‘I should be getting back. John said we would be leaving soon.’ It was a lie.
‘Come on. Walker gets you all the time. A few minutes without you won’t kill the man.’ Sam pleaded. You hesitated. ‘Unless you don’t want to.’ Sam added giving you an out.
‘No, no it’s fine. No alcohol though I’m DDing.’ Sam walked you to the bar, ordering another beer for himself and you got a shirley temple. You sat in a comfortable silence as the bartender made you your drink. You never had a problem with Sam and despite what John says about the man, you enjoy his company. The bartender placed your drink down in front of you, and you took a slow sip; savoring the taste. You do a small dance at the taste. Sam chuckled. ‘Sorry, I don’t drink these a lot.’ You blushed
‘No please be happy. It’s nice. Why don’t you drink them anymore?’ You shrugged. You knew the answer. John said they were childish. You aren’t the biggest fan of drinking, you’ve seen your fair share of horror scenes at the hospital due to someone having a little too much to drink. And if that didn’t turn you off from drinking - John’s behavior did.
‘I kind of forget about them.’ You lied. Sam raised his eyebrows. ‘Congratulations on stopping the Flag Smasher,’ You said quickly, trying to move the conversation away from yourself. ‘I saw your speech at work. I’m sorry about Karli too. I think her heart was in the right place in the beginning.’ Sam sighed.
‘I hope positive change can come from all of this.’
‘With you at the helm it will.’ You sincerely said.
‘Don’t inflate my ego anymore.’ You laughed, throwing your head back.
‘Please according to Bucky your head can’t fit into any building.’ Sam groaned.
‘Do not listen to anything that geezer says.’ You laughed again. It felt so good to laugh so freely without the weight of someone judging you.
‘Geezer? Aren’t you older than him?’
‘Sh. Scream it from the roof top why don’t you?’ You giggled, a bright smile on your face. But the smile formed into a frown and you sighed when your name was drunkenly called out. You take another ship when you hear footsteps approaching you.
‘Babygirl, it’s time to head out. The guys want to get pizza.’ John put his arm around your shoulders. You fought your body’s natural reaction and leaned into his embrace instead. You felt John tense as he was looking at Sam, ‘Wilson.’
‘Walker.’ There was a tension between the two you didn’t like.
‘I’ll be right behind you, let me just pay for my drink.’ You shot Sam a look, pleading with him to not say he was the one that brought it.
‘Okay, close my tab as well.’ He kissed you. His lips linger longer than normal. You grimaced at the taste of alcohol on his lips as he pulled away, walking back to his table. You let out a forced breath and called over the bartender.
‘Are you okay?’ Sam asked. He watched as your hands shook as you got your card out of your wallet.
‘I’m fine.’ You hand the bartender your card and tell him you are closing John’s tap. ‘Thank you for the drink Sam.’ You turned to leave.
‘Hey sunflower,’ You stopped and faced him. ‘You need anything you know where to find me, okay?’ You stared at him for a moment, the confession of who John Walker truly is on the tip of your tongue. But you held it in.
‘Uh thank you Sam.’ You finally said.
Sam watched as John put his arm around you and pulled you close, as the rest of the table followed close behind. From the very beginning of his career at SHIELD, he learned to listen to his gut and his gut was telling him that something was very wrong. But he had no evidence. He saw you flinch away from his touch but that could because you were tired. A lawyer would throw away this case in a heartbeat. He sighed and walked back to the table, flopping back into his chair. ‘Are you okay Sam?’ Wanda asked.
‘Yeah, yeah I’m great.’ Wanda gave him a look. She didn’t work with SHIELD but she was married to Vision, who was a computer analyst. She was part of the family nonetheless. She always seemed to know what someone was truly thinking, like she could read their minds.
‘Did y/n leave already? I didn’t get the chance to talk to her.’ Sam nodded, drinking the rest of his beer.
‘John wanted pizza so they went to get pizza.’ Sam said bitterly. Wanda and Bucky shared a look with one another. ‘What do you know about their relationship?’
‘They’ve been together for 3 years. I think Lemar was the one that brought them together. That’s really all I know.’ Wanda said.
‘Where is your head at Sam?’ Bucky asked.
‘My head is nowhere.’ He heard Clint mumble, ‘Bullshit,’ under his breath. Sam groaned. ‘I think Walker is hurting her. I just don’t know to what extent or I’m reading into to much because-’
‘Because you love her.’ Natasha cut him off. Sam’s jaw dropped. He opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water as Natasha smirked into her drink. Bucky closed his mouth, the table laughed.
‘I don’t love her. I care about her. There is a difference.’ Sam defended. Natasha shrugged, rolling her eyes. ‘And I can’t ask her because she would deny it.’
‘Especially since he hangs around her all the time,’ Maria added. ‘He has a leash around her neck.’
‘You just need to get her alone, a safe space, and around people she can trust.’ Clint said. Yeah, easier said than done, Sam thought.
‘How about tomorrow? Steve and I were thinking about throwing a small pool party. We can invite her.’ Natasha suggested, getting out her phone and sending a quick text.
‘I’ll invite her,’ Wanda said. ‘I have her phone number and I’m the closest to her out of any of you, it won’t look so suspicious.’
‘And if Walker is hitting her? What are we going to do?’ Bucky asked.
‘She’s family,’ Sam said simply. ‘And we help our family.’
You ungracefully unlocked the door to your shared apartment as John kept pushing your hair to the side and kissing at your neck. ‘Let me open the door first.’ You said. John groaned, pulling himself away from you.
‘Can’t help it baby. You looked so good tonight.’ You rolled your eyes and opened the door. You threw your purse on the chair and hung up your keys as John closed the door. You took your shoes off, almost moaning as the pressure on your sore feet was released. You laid on the couch and watched John walk into the kitchen, opening the fridge, and grabbed a beer. You sighed and closed your eyes, feeling the couch move as John sat down next to you. It was nice, quiet, peaceful, and sleep was calling your name. But you felt John staring at you. You slowly opened your eyes, locking onto his. He took a long sip of the beer and placed it on the table. ‘What’s going on, Johnny?’ You asked, sitting up. It took a moment for John to speak, he grabbed your legs and started to massage your calves.
‘Are you cheating on me with Wilson?’ He finally asked.
‘What? No!’ You said, pulling your legs away from him. ‘We were just talking.’ He pushed you onto the couch, your head hitting the arm rest. He quickly covered your body with his.
‘Good because you are mine.’
‘Wait?’ He questioned grabbing your waists and forcing your hands above your head. ‘You don’t get to say no to me. Did you say no to Wilson when he asked if he could buy you a drink?’ He squeezed your wrist. You whimpered. ‘Answer me!’ He demanded
‘Exactly. You were being a slut and sluts get punished.’
You laid in your bed, staring at the ceiling. The blanket wrapped tightly around your naked body and John’s snores echoing in the quiet room. You got up, wincing and grabbed a shirt from the floor. It was one of John’s old academy shirts - it went to the middle of your thighs. You quietly made your way to the kitchen, each step hurting. You were lucky it was your day off because these bruises would be impossible to cover up. You filled a glass of water from the sink and down it, filling it again. Your hands shook slightly and your eyes fell on a picture on the wall. It was a picture of you, John, and Lemar at John’s parents’ lake house. You couldn’t remember why the party was being thrown but it was the first family function as his girlfriend. He paraded you around as he wore his military uniform with pride. He introduced you to them, saying that he’d marry you. But as you both walked away from whoever you just met, he’d look you in the eyes and said it was just a joke. A way to get them off his back. But he’d kiss you in a way that made your heart jump and after every new introduction got you hoping one day he would mean it. That party was 2 years ago. You sighed, cleaned the glass, and put it back. You made your way back to bed. As you slipped underneath the covers, John rolled over and wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest.
‘I love you babygirl.’ He mumbled.
You woke up to the smell of food and the sound of the bedroom door opening. You opened your eyes, rubbing sleep out of them as John walked in with your favorite breakfast. You sat up, masking the pain your body was in, and smiled. ‘What’s all this?’ He placed the tray on your lap - you could smell the cinnamon from the french toast. A small vase was filled with flowers. He kissed your cheek.
‘Good morning beautiful. I thought I would do something nice for you.’ He shrugged. ‘Mostly to say I’m sorry for last night and thank you for taking care of me. I know when I drink I can be a handful.’
‘Well apologize accepted.’ It tasted bitter in your mouth. He sat at the edge of the bed, watching you eat. He swiped a piece of bacon off your plate, and you gave him a playful glare. He chuckled. ‘What’s your plan for today?’ You asked.
‘The guys and I are going fishing. They should be here shortly to pick me up and I won’t be back till late tonight.’ You felt a weight come off your shoulders. ‘What about you? Today is your day off.’ You nodded.
‘May see if some of the girls want to get together or may just have a lazy day.’ The first order of business was to tend to your bruises or they would take longer to heal.
‘Well you deserve whatever you choose. You deserve to have a day to yourself, you work too hard.’ You gave him a smile. He confused you, it was like a switch went on and off and on and off. From a loving boyfriend that would cook breakfast, and massage your back after a long day to an angry, drunk monster that would leave bruises all over your body. ‘I plugged your phone in this morning. You have some texts from Wanda?’
‘The lab techy.’ You nodded. ‘Why does she have your number?’ His tone shifted.
‘Her son broke his arm and I was the doctor on call at the time. She recognized me from the bar.’ John nodded as his phone went off.
‘That’s the guys. Have a great day. I love you.’
‘I love you too Johnny.’ He left the room, you laid back with a sigh. You touched the petals on the flowers. Flowers weren’t just used for big apologies. It was a theme. He would hurt you then the next morning he would bring you breakfast in bed with a vase of flowers. You picked up your phone that rested on your nightstand. There were multiple texts from Wanda.
Wanda: Hey! Sorry we didn’t talk a lot tonight. Sam said you were headed home. Text me when you are back.
Wanda: Oh Sam said you are getting pizza. Eat a slice for me. You giggled at that.
Wanda: Alright you should be home now unless you got A LOT of pizza.
Wanda: So, you are home. I definitely didn’t have Vis track your phone.
‘Isn’t that illegal?’ You asked, very aware that you were alone in your apartment and no one was there to answer you.
Wanda: Don’t tell Sam though. She added a winky face. You laughed, typing a quick reply back.
You: I’m alive. Dealt with a very drunk John and passed out. You sighed at the lie as you hit send. Wanda’s response was almost instant.
Wanda: Do you have plans today? You bit your lip.
You: John left for an all day fishing trip and I have today off. So just a day to myself. You hit send and your phone started to ring. Wanda’s name appeared. With a sigh, you answered it.
‘Morning sunflower. So, you are free today?’ Wanda asked.
‘In a way.’ You said slowly.
‘In a way,“ she mocked. You giggled. ‘Nat and Steve are having a cookout today and we wanted to invite you.’
‘Who’s we?’ You questioned.
‘Me, Sam, Bucky, Nat, just to name a few.’ She responded. Your anxiety spiked.
‘John isn’t here,’ You said quickly. ‘I don’t want to intrude.’
‘You aren’t,’ Wanda said. ‘We want you to be there. Please.’ You pinched the bridge of your nose, thinking about everything. If you said you weren’t going that would be suspicious especially because Sam was going to be there. But if you decide to go - how would you hide the bruises? Shit. ‘‘I’ll drive! I mean you’ll have to deal with the kids.’
‘Is Vision not going?’ You asked. Vision and Wanda were the definition of soulmates. It was cute. Wanda sighed.
‘No, he has to work. Some of the departments got half days but Vis has to work his full shift. So, what do you say?’ She asked, you could tell by her voice that she was pouting. You sighed, looking at the alarm clock on your nightstand.
‘What time?’ You finally asked.
‘I can pick you up at 12:30, send me your address. Oh and bring a swimsuit, they have a pool.’
‘Okay I will see you soon.’
‘Bye.’ You said your goodbyes and hung up. With a groan, you flopped back down, the tray on your lap almost tipping over. The breakfast would grow cold because you couldn’t stomach it. What have you gotten yourself into?
Getting ready was slow work. You took a hot shower to soothe your aching muscles and applied a healing appointment you took from the hospital onto your bruises. The ones on your arms and upper thighs could be covered by a dress - you had a long sleeve one that you had in mind. But it was the bruise on your throat that would be more difficult. You carefully covered it with make-up, taking your time as it was still sore to touch. You looked at yourself in the mirror and admired your handy-work. The bruise was completely gone, you almost laughed. If your job at the hospital fell through you could always go into makeup. You just had to avoid the water, at a pool party. Double shit.
You received a text message from Wanda telling you that she was outside your appointment. You put your bag over y0ur shoulder and double checked you had everything - a swimsuit, extra make-up, your wallet, and a water bottle. You sighed and left your appointment.
Wanda was standing outside of her car, leaning against the hood. When she saw you, her smile got big and she waved. You couldn’t help the smile that came so easily to your face. ‘Sunflower!’ She said, pulling you into a hug. You bit your lip, stopping the sound of pain from coming out of your lips. ‘You look so cute!’ She said, pulling away from you.
‘Thank you Wands. I like your dress too.’ She was wearing a simple white dress, her blue swimsuit could be seen through it.
‘Let’s get going before my boys throw a tantrum.’ You laughed as you got into the passenger side, placing your bag on the floor.
‘Hello boys.’ You said, glancing at Tommy and Billy.
‘Hello Dr. L/N.’ You grimaced.
‘Ew. No it’s y/n. Don’t make me feel that old.’ They laughed, placing their headphones back on and getting lost in their phones.
‘How are you?’ Wanda asked, pulling onto the road and starting the drive. You sighed.
‘Tired.’ Wanda gave you a small smile, grabbing onto your hand, and squeezing it.
‘Well today is a day for relaxation.’ You smiled, hoping that was all today was going to bring.
Sam found himself watching you again, as he sat at the edge of the pool with his legs dangling in the water. You were sitting at a table with Laura and Maria. You were smiling at something Laura was telling you. Steve and Natasha were finishing the food while Clint and Yelena swam around with the kids. Bucky sat next to him. ‘She seems happy.’ Bucky said. Sam nodded.
‘I would be happy too if Walker wasn’t around.’ Silence passed between the two. ‘Do you find it weird she’s wearing a long sleeve dress on such a nice day?’
‘Maybe it’s laundry day.’ Sam gave Bucky a glare. ‘Aren’t you the one that never passes judgment onto a person?’
‘You hate Walker.’ Sam said simply.
‘Yes but I also don’t want to believe he’s hitting Sunflower.’ Wanda sat on the other side of Sam, passing them both a water. Bucky thanked her with a nod as he opened it.
‘Don’t worry,’ She said. ‘I have a plan.’ She pointed to her kids, Clint’s kids, and Clint, getting out of the pool and angling themselves towards the table. The three watched as they ran and jumped into the pool. The splash caused by the group soaked the table.
‘Clint!’ Laura shirked. Clint resurfaced with a laugh.
‘Might as well come in now that you are all wet!’ Clint called out.
‘Look at her face.’ Sam said. The other two women were annoyed but they took off their covers and climbed into the pool. You were frozen. You didn’t get that wet but you shook off your shock and walked to the edge of the pool and sat down, putting your feet in.
‘Go talk to her.’ Bucky said, nugging Sam with his shoulder. Sam nodded, got into the pool and swam over.
‘Sunflower, I’m glad you could grace us with your presence.’ You rolled your eyes.
‘I can’t say no to free food and drinks.’ You smirked. ‘Wanda also mentioned playing pool and I had to come and kick your butts.’ Sam laughed, shaking his head.
‘Oh she talks a big game. I like to tell you Barton and I are raining champs.’
‘The water is nice,’ Sam said. ‘Food won’t be ready for a while. Might as well get in.’ He added.
‘Not a big swimmer.’ Sam raised his eyebrows. ‘I don’t want to get my hair wet.’ Sam rolled his eyes.
‘I don’t understand girls.’ You giggled.
‘You aren’t supposed to Wilson.’ You splashed the water with your legs, you looked lost in your thoughts and Sam let you sit in them. ‘I’m surprised you are here,’ You said suddenly. ‘The new team lead and you are already slacking.’ Your voice was full of teasing. Sam gasped playfully and slapped his hand against his chest.
‘Your words wound me.’ You smiled. ‘And for your information Fury gave me the day off.’ You hummed and looked around the pool area, your eyes stopping at each person.
‘You got yourself a good team, Wilson. I’m excited to see what you do with it.’ Sam’s chest filled with pride at your compliment.
‘All I needed was your confidence in me.’ Sam said softly. There was something in your eyes as you looked at him, something he couldn’t name. A light blush covered your cheeks.
‘You’ve always had it.’ It happened rather suddenly. Sam was so caught up in looking at you he didn’t see Tommy and Billy come up behind you. They pushed you in the pool, giggling as they ran away. You resurfaced with a gasp. Sam grabbed onto your waist and helped you grab onto the edge of the pool. You coughed up water, surprised by the sudden push, and you whipped the water out of your eyes. You saw Sam looking at you but not at your face, at your neck. Your stomach dropped and it felt like you were being pushed into the pool all over again.
‘Y/n.’ He said slowly, raising his hand. You flinched away from him. His face dropped.
‘I-i have to go.’ You climbed out of the pool, almost slipping on the wet surface. You made a beeline towards the table where your bag was and grabbed it. Sam called out your name again. You turned around and saw him getting out of the pool, the sudden commotion grabbed the attention of everyone in the backyard. All of their eyes were on you and you felt claustrophobic. You ran to the outdoor bathroom, closing and locking the door being you.
‘Sunflower, open the door please.’ You heard Sam say from behind the closed door. You sank to the floor, back against the door, and hugged your knees to your chest. You tried to muffle the sound of your sobs but they grew louder and you had no idea why you were crying. Maybe you were crying out of panic. Sam saw the bruise. What was going to happen? What was he going to do? Or maybe you were crying out of relief. Someone finally knew the pain you were holding on too. Someone could finally set you free.
Sam couldn’t stand still. When he saw the hand print on your neck, he saw red. It took Maria, Wanda, Natasha, and Laura to get you out of the bathroom and the 5 of you were in one of the guest bedrooms. Yelena was watching the kids. That left Steve, Clint, Bucky, and Sam outside all of their blood’s boiling.
‘I’m going to kill him.’ Bucky growled. Sam nodded, still pacing.
‘Get in line, pal. How could he do that? Especially to her.’ Clint asked, standing up and moving behind his chair. His hands squeezing the top of it, his knuckles turning white.
‘We aren’t going to do anything.’ Steve said. They all looked at Steve, mouths open.
‘Did you not see the bruise on her neck?’ Bucky asked. Steve sighed, nodding his head.
‘I did. I don’t know y/n well but I do know she wouldn’t want all of you to risk your careers over this,’ He said simply. ‘Do you think that is maybe why she didn’t tell any of you?’ Sam understood where Steve was coming from. He was the voice of reason of the group, constantly talking Bucky and Sam out of doing stupid things. But it didn’t make Sam feel any better. Right now Sam wanted to be angry, be upset, and punch John Walker in the face.
The sound of the sliding glass door caused Sam to stop pacing. Natasha was standing there, arms crossed against her chest, and her jaw clenched. There was a fire in her eyes that shocked Sam. It stumped everyone into silence. ‘That bad?’ Sam asked, finding his voice. Natasha nodded.
‘She didn’t tell us everything. Maria documented her injuries.’
‘Is she reporting him?’ Steve asked. Natasha shrugged. Sam could tell Natasha was fighting to control her anger.
‘She didn’t give us a direct answer,’ She sighed. ‘Laura and Maria are finishing the food. Wanda is still with her. We think it would be best if you guys stay out here.’ A chorus of ‘of course’, ‘absolutely’, and ‘whatever she needs’ moved across the men. Natasha looked at Sam. ‘She wants to speak with you.’
‘Me?’ She nodded as Sam walked into the house and she stopped him.
‘Prepare yourself. He did a number on her.’ Sam nodded, walking into the house.
To say he was surprised was an understatement that you wanted to speak with him. In less than 24 hours he’s said more words to you than every interaction you both had at Avengers. He was nervous, a coil of anxiety wrapped around his stomach, as he walked to the guest room. He sighed, trying to steady his racing heart. ‘It’s me.’ He said, keeping his voice steady.
‘Come in.’ Wanda called out. Sam opened the door and saw you sitting on the edge of the bed, Wanda kneeling in front of you. He saw your body shaking. ‘Do you want me to stay?’ Wanda asked. You shook her head, in a no. ‘Okay if you need me come get me.’ You nodded again. Wanda gave Sam a smile as she left - closing the door behind her. Sam went to take Wanda’s spot, he kept his face neutral as he looked at you. Your hair was damp from the pool and you were wearing one of Steve’s shirts and a pair of Natasha’s shorts. He could see more bruises lacing your skin and his gut twisted with anger. He partially blamed himself. He knew he should have said something at the bar, anything to make you stay.
‘Hey Sunflower.’ Sam kept his voice soft, not wanting to trigger you. ‘What do you need?’ You let out a shaky breath.
‘I don’t know Sam.’ You whispered as tears started to run down your face. Sam fought every muscle in his body to not wrap in his arms and wipe away your tears. ‘I’m scared. He’s never been this violent before. Before he would just yell a lot.’
‘Is this the first time he’s hit you?’ He asked. You couldn’t look him in the eyes, you were playing with the bottom of your shit. You were a doctor. You’ve sat with men and women as they cried because they felt stuck in their relationship and you’ve given them the resources to get away. Maybe if you were more conscious of how he spoke to you, you wouldn’t be in this position in the first place. Maybe you were holding onto what you thought he was.
‘No.’ You finally spoke. ‘It got bad after Lemar’s death.’ Sam nodded, with a sad smile.
‘Do you want to leave him?’ Sam asked. You didn’t answer. ‘This isn’t okay,’ You opened your mouth to say something. ‘And this is not your fault either.’
‘He keeps saying he’ll stop. That he loves me.’
‘This isn’t love,’ Sam said softly.
‘There is a version of him in my head before all of this started happening. That he loves me and will stop hurting me,’ Your fingers danced over the bruises on your arms, thighs, and stopped at the one on your throat. ‘But I know that picture isn’t true. My mom used to tell me, that young people fall in love with the wrong people, guess my one was him.’ You looked at Sam. ‘Please help me leave him. Please.’ You pulled him into a hug. Without hesitation, Sam wrapped his arms around you.
‘I got you. You’re safe. He’s never going to hurt you again.’
The cookout at Steve’s and Natasha was 6 months ago. Within the week of everyone finding out, Sam and the other’s helped you move out of the apartment and into Sam’s guest room. You reported the abuse and although the charges didn’t stick, (Everyone believed that Rumlow had a hand in it.)John was fired from SHIELD and you filed a restraining order. You learned after the break up that John was cheating on you. The fishing trips weren’t ‘fishing’ trips. It was a hard 6 months of healing but you felt freer. You felt like your old self. You laughed loudly. You smiled more. You became closer with everyone. You got invited to team dinners and drinks at Avengers. None of this healing wouldn’t have happened without Sam. He was there through every panic attack and nightmare. He helped heal your mind, body, and heart. In return, you made sure he took breaks from the case and you gave him a source of light in the abyss. It wasn’t a surprise when you started to develop feelings for the man that saved you and you told him. He felt the same but wanted to take it slow. You were still healing and that made you love him even more.
It was another drinking night at Avengers, you were practically sitting on Sam’s lap. His arms wrapped around your waist. His head resting on your shoulder as you listened to Clint to talk about his kids. He was tracing shapes on your thigh - knowing being at this bar caused some anxiety but you refused for John to take this place away from you. You looked around the table. Bucky was smiling with his arm around Yelena. Wanda was resting her head on Vision’s shoulder. Bruce and Tony were at the bar. You saw some of the younger agents, Kate, Peter, and America at the ‘kids’ table. Even Nat and Steve showed up. Nat still worked for SHIELD but she was starting to put in for retirement. You heard through the grapevine that they were going to try for a kid. You loved the idea of a mini Steve and Natasha running around. Sam kissed your cheek and you saw Bucky move to whisper something in his ear. You didn’t think much of it as Sam tightened his hold on you.
‘Walker,’ You looked towards the door with wide eyes. Maria was the one who confronted John. ‘You weren’t welcomed here.’ His eyes scanned the room and he found you. He walked over to your table. Bucky, Clint, and Steve stood up. Steve placed a hand on Natasha’s shoulder keeping her from standing.
‘Get your hands off my girl, Wilson.’ John said. Sam laughed.
‘She’s not your girl, Walker.’
‘So she’s yours now?’ Sam shook his head.
‘She’s her own person. Maybe that is why things turned out the way they did - you see her as something to own and to control.’ You watched as John’s hands turned into fists. You knew he wasn’t that stupid, to start a fist fight in a room of trained agents. ‘Now I suggest you walk back the way you came because you are violating the restraining order and you are in a room filled with federal agents.’ John laughed - you fought to keep yourself from having a reaction.
‘Go home John. Leave me alone.’ You found your voice. You saw how blood shut his eyes were.
‘I didn’t think I gave you permission to speak. I guess Wilson can’t control you like I could. Now be a good little slut and keep your mouth shut. The adults are talking.’ Natasha stood up quickly causing the table to move. You got off Sam’s lap and stood in front of him, putting your hand up to stop them. You felt your blood boiling. You were angry. You were frustrated that he would not leave you alone - you had to get a new phone number and security at your job had to remove him from the hospital multiple times.
‘Go home John, you’re drunk and making a fool out of yourself.’ You said turning around. He grabbed your arm. You pulled it back. ‘Leave before I let them kick your ass.’
‘I knew you were sucking Wilson’s dick while we were together. Who else did you get to? Barnes? Barton?’
‘I didn’t cheat on you John unlike you.’ You laughed, shaking your head. ‘You weren’t even man enough to tell me yourself that you were seeing her. She told me on Facebook and told me all about your little ‘fishing trips’.’ You added the air quotes as you looked over John’s shoulder. ‘Hey Rumlow, does your wife know about your little guy’s trips to the lake?’
‘You are nothing without me.’
‘I am everything without you,’ You said, pointing at him. ‘You are the one that broke me even Lemar told me to leave you.’
‘Don’t you bring him into this.’ John said, stepping closer to you. You knew the table behind you was on edge. But you had to face him. You couldn’t hide behind them anymore.
‘Before he was your friend he was mine.’ You pushed John on the chest, pushing him into the center of the bar.
‘Y/n.’ Sam warned. You ignored him.
‘You wouldn’t even let me mourn him without you screaming at me, saying I wasn’t his friend. Do you remember that night he died?’ You asked.
‘He was murdered!’ He yelled
‘And you killed a man that wasn’t the person responsible for it. Do you remember that night John?’ You asked again. He didn’t respond. You raised your arm pointing to a scar. ‘How did I get this scar, Johnny?’ He licked his lips. ‘I’ll tell your former co-workers. I was looking for comfort after learning my best fucking friend since I was a kid was murdered and what did you do? You took the empty vodka bottle and smashed it against my arm. Who are you to tell me I can’t be heartbroken?’ The bar was silent, a pin could be dropped and you could hear it. ‘12 stitches and you bought me flowers and I stayed.’ You shook your head.
‘I kinda hate myself for justifying your mistakes. It took a minute but I learned the shit the hard way that you ruined me. So if you need to tell yourself that it was all my fault, that I made you do all those horrible things to help you sleep at night then do it and pretend that I haven’t found a man who finally treats me right. If it’s hurting, then leave, and go get some fucking help.’ You took another step forward. ‘Get the fuck out of this bar, Walker. You lost.’ You turned back to your table and sat down.
‘I would listen to her.’ Bucky said.
‘Fucking crazy bitch.’ John said, turning and leaving. Slamming the bar door behind him. The bar erupted into claps and cheers. You laughed with a smile.
‘Now that was amazing.’ Clint said.
‘I definitely thought he was going to shit himself.’ Yelena smiled.
‘We are going to have to report him. He violated the terms of the restraining order.’ Vision said.
‘That’s tomorrow’s problem.’ Wanda said, kissing his cheek. ‘Let the girl celebrate a win.’ Sam pulled you back onto his lap, you spun around to face him.
‘You okay sunflower?’ You looked at him, smiling. Your eyes glanced to his lips and you pulled him into a soft kiss. You felt him smile through it. You pulled away, resting your forehead against his.
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