and Jimmy Page is coming out of the closet @keepcalmandcarryfire - Tumblr Blog

lovesicklobotomy

metal-autistic-coven

Happy pride month to him

monkeesheritageposts

give-grian-rights

every moment of this was baffling and jaw-dropping. truly, this is tumblr discourse at its peak

kaiasky

its terrible for any number of reasons, but i think if we invent immortality there should be an extreme sport called civilizational speedrunning where teams of 20 go into the wilderness somewhere and try and be the fastest build the first internal combustion engine. i bet you could get it down to like 3 years tops

biggestzam

The real trick is to eat seed heavy food before the speedrun starts so your first poops are halfway to agriculture already

kaiasky

i want you on my team holy shit

filmnoirsbian

There's a labyrinth. In the middle of it, a minotaur is making waffles.

butchniqabi

Minotaur in his kitchen

filmnoirsbian

byjove

this is a highly controversial opinion, I have no doubt King Arthur was bisexual but I think he was one of the few people in Camelot not interested in fucking Lancelot. he wanted to retain him as an employee but it did not cross his mind that Lancelot was fucking his wife because Lancelot is such a weird little twerp that he did not perceive him as a sexual being. my interpretation.

byjove

So true. The Galehaut/Lancelot relationship was like a dynastic marriage to resolve the conflict between two imperial powers. I like to imagine Galehaut was like “I have decided to abandon my plans of capturing [what is now] all of southern England and surrender to you despite my military advantage, all for the love of my achingly beautiful and spectacular new male wife, Lancelot du Lac.” and Arthur was like “Okay. Weird. Not homophobic or anything but Lancelot? You’re in love with Lancelot?”

byjove

Co-signed. That’s some real shit you said. Also, unlike Arthur, he was willing to yield and share his lover for everyone’s benefit. And then he died for love. A real freak. One of the best freaks in 13th century French literature.

byjove

he’s the most interesting gay wifeguy in literary gay knight history

beautifulbizarremagazine

Sometimes art just makes you STOP in your tracks, and this is one of them for me. Female sculptor @brigittelajoinie had created this powerhouse of a metal sculpture: "La Femme qui marche" (2017) - photographed by @zoeforgetphotography

Materials: Reinforced steel, steel, glue, pearl, gold leaf, oil patina, recycled elements (wire mesh, rubber, horsehair, plastic soldiers and horses, buttons).

arikakari

its pride month, tumblr. you know what that means

wizardarchetypes

i remember in a college acting course two of my classmates were assigned a scene between macbeth and lady macbeth, and the day of exams macbeth showed up high out of his fucking mind. just zonked to hell. and usually that would be so annoying and not actually make a person better at acting, but he got up on stage for the exam and started panicking and pivoted hard into a paranoid high while lady macbeth tore into him and he looked more genuinely terrified than any oscar win i've ever seen

loki-zen

has anyone considered that it was probably her house too. where else was she supposed to put her chintz?

phaeton-flier

Bear religion probably fucking rocks. You're a fucking bear, you're the deadliest thing on earth, once a year an endless supply of salmon just flings itself up the river to gorge on and then you nap for 3 months.

phaeton-flier

The most delicious food in the world is protected by tiny demons who can defend it from everyone except you. Your natural armor is thick enough that you can just eat the damn hive while they buzz around you. God's chosen animals right there

theaudientvoid

centrally-unplanned

Regular bears tell stories of angel bears sent by the Bear God, pure white and twice as strong as any normal bear could be, who rule the summit of the Earth and kill all who stand in their path.

And they are right, those bears exist and totally do that. Humans just have fake angels as a cope.

urgetocreate

John Michael Carter (American b,1950), Summer Reading, 1986, Oil on linen

sexhaver

it's extremely funny reading historical accounts of Spontaneous Human Combustion because it follows the normal historical trend of other 1800s paranormal phenomena where it stopped happening as much right around the time cameras were invented and stopped happening entirely when everyone started carrying mini cameras in their pockets, but unlike most others of its ilk, it was effectively replaced by this mysterious phenomena where alocoholics would spill liqour on themselves and then fall asleep smoking a cigarette and turn into a fireball. nobody knows if these two things are related