so i was thinking about the period of time after vegas gets shot and until he's out of hospital, and how macau and pete are his only two regular visitors.
and how pete and macau would have bonded during that time.
until this point, macau hasnt even had time to mourn his dad, because everything has just been vegas vegas vegas.
and id like to think that on one of those days when they're both at the hospital, in vegas' room, watching as vegas sleeps, and its a warm sunny afternoon and time is just ticking along slowly,
macau asks pete if he saw his dad. if vegas saw him. how vegas reacted when he saw their dad's lifeless dead body. he asks pete about vegas, and how on earth did vegas get shot.
and pete, because he is pete, is just honest about it all. he tells macau about how vegas was on the verge of blowing his own brains out and killing himself. how he came just in time. how he had almost talked vegas down. how vegas had even turned around and smiled at him. and then ...
and throughout all of this, macau is just sat looking at vegas' sleeping body on the bed. as he hears pete narrate all of this to him.
and then he says out loud, "was i not enough?". and then he stops himself and shakes his head and says "no, i'm being selfish. when all hia has been towards me all my life is selfless. i'd understand if he did do it. i know just how exhausted he is. he tries to hide all these things from me, but i know, you know?".
and pete has a huge moment of realisation dawn upon him there. just how Good of a big brother vegas is. just how deep the brotherhood between vegas and macau goes.
and pete tells macau that he is enough. that vegas loves him. that he wants macau to never ever feel like vegas has forgotten about him. that if he's vegas' baby brother, then he is his baby brother too. that he wants them to be comfortable and open with one another. that he vows to protect both him and vegas and this little family with everything in him. that he's sorry about his dad's demise.
and macau looks at pete and shakes his head, saying how yeah, he may have lost his dad, but he got pete too. and that he just ... so desperately, so badly ... wants this to work. wants to feel what being a part of a loving, safe family means. he just wants to see his big brother look and feel happy, relaxed and fully at peace for once.
and pete vows, once again, that they're gonna make this work. they'll work at it over and over again, everyday, and they'll make this work.
and. vegas. vegas isnt sleeping through all this. no. he's fully awake, just with his eyelids closed, as he hears the only two most important people in his life talk about this all. this time, its his turn to eavesdrop. and he makes a promise to himself to never, ever put these 2 boys in the kind of anguish he was going to, had pete not come in time.