Kelsey

There ain't no party like a Kelsey party cause the Kelsey party don't stop

[versacethotty]

me pitching a show to netflix: okay so queer eye but instead the gays fuck up the lives of men who deserve it

[that-twink-over-there]

Queere Eye for an Eye

[gagglescorn]

I can’t afford boomerang so I have to do it myself

[grimesdidthat-deactivated201805]

Isn’t boomerang like.. free?

[mercedesbenzodiazepine]

She can’t afford it

[gagglescorn]

I can’t afford it

[still-intrepid]

several of the pokedex descriptions are #relatable 

honourable mention of course to Abra:

but the winner is:

[aurordream]

Personally I’m a fan of Alolan Ninetales

[still-intrepid]

okay that’s beautiful

[astraldemise]

a stray cat showed up in my garden earlier and i named him todd howard as a joke but now i have to live with this because my stepfather just said “todd howard didnt eat the cat food i left out for him”

[astraldemise]

this is him

[phsfg]

The weirdest thing I’ve learned while working for pest control is that snails love rat poison and will actively eat it but hate seseme seeds

[phsfg]

I should add that rat poison has NO effect on snails, and they just get super fat cause they gourge themselves in boxes of rat poison

[hexpress]

absolute units

[spikespiegell]

do ya ever bring your pet up to a mirror and ur like “that you”

[vykodlak]

[1stprototype]

[mylanguagestudies]

me: wow i sure have learned a lot in this language i am so proud native speaker: *says hello in a new way* me:

[rockleeswife]

me: *flips dogs ear inside out* me: can u..,. hear better like this

[robloxgf-deactivated20190515]

3 hours of silence BASS BOOSTED

[puertohurraco]

I think that’s called tinnitus

[beaky-peartree]

remember when lol meant “laughing out loud” instead of “this is to indicate that this brief text isn’t hostile”

[mjalti]

when someone says “so what do you like to do for fun” unexpectedly so u didn’t have time to prep ur answers and now ur actually trying to think of the last time u felt joy

[cobaltdays-deactivated20210208]

if you firmly believe cowboy cats would say meowdy hit that mf reblog

[zackisontumblr]

[yellew]

*falls behind in life* haha the lag

[papajohnpizzas-deactivated20181]

just watchin a british show and the dude said bath like “barth” that shit will never get old

[papajohnpizzas-deactivated20181]

british accents are so dumb fuck you if you’re british

[thrillervevo]

when you compliment someone and they don’t compliment you back