hey im kett

19, isfp, pisces, any pronouns. 

[cunttime]

*me, flirting* so which songs are you going to permanently associate with me?

[taiyami]

Villain apologist? Nah, I don't apologize for anyone. What my lover does on his days off is not my business.

[island-delver-go]

Source

[themaskedhero]

[tentadog-deactivated20220704]

[inthetags]

Reblog and put in the tags your favorite indie game that isn’t Undertale or Shovel Knight

[letitrainathousandflames-archive]

I bet Jar Jar is fucking hung like a whale. God he can raw me anyday.

I spent like two? Three? Entire weeks with this sitting in my askbox and I just. I got nothing. What could I possibly answer? I tried all the “nope” gifs in this god forsaken website, I tried to draw what my face looks like every time I read this, I tried to find fanart of jar jar with his wang out and the universe was kind enough to me so that I couldn’t find any. I got nothing. Nada. Abso-fucking-lutely nothing. What am I gonna say? What in god’s name am I gonna say to that?!

You see, I wanna fuck general grievous. I do. I want him use all his four arms to simultaneously pull both my arms back and touch my tits as he fucks me with his mecha-schlong. I do. I wanna fuck darth Maul, pre-legs cut off or post metal legs+metal dick enhancement. I wanna lick those horns. Okay? I wanna fuck darth vader. Boy, oh, boy, I do. I wanna hear that hard breathing and wrap my legs over that dramatic cape while he force-chokes me and we do the do. Am I a weird robot-fucker? You bet your ass I am! Am I a tad too much on the horny side? Probably. Did I extrapolate my right to be horny on main? Fucking sue me. But this. THIS.

How do you want me to face my family and all the three (3) friends I have irl? How do you want me to walk into an elevator with a bunch of strangers and when an old lady says “the weather has been a little hot lately, isn’t it weird?” just to do small talk like every fucking old people I don’t know do, how do you expect me not to answer her with “y’know what’s weirder, someone at this very moment is thinking about Jar Jar Binks going balls-deep in them and I cannot talk about this to anyone and the knowledge of this? it’s eating me alive. ALIVE, ma’am, and I don’t mean this as some sick vore reference. Someone’s dreaming of those popped-up eyes, of that weird high-pitched voice screaming MEESA COMING while they’re filled up by Jar Jar Bink’s thick seed, and I’m just standing here while this very notion rots me to the core, taking all life away from me. It’s a nightmare. My entire life, a nightmare, because of an anon message from a horny jar jar fucker on tumblr. This is my floor now, ma’am, have a good day”

I leave the elevator. I probably have an appointment, but I can’t remember where, or what for. I sit down on the floor by the elevator doors. I sob for a full minute. I take the elevator back downstairs, I walk home, I collapse in bed and rub one out thinking of darth vader. I feel better.

Five minutes later, I think about this ask again, and my whole world collapses again. It’s only Tuesday. I sigh heavily and sit down to write this reply.-

Edit: a lot of this is exaggeration. Some of it is true. You get to pick what exactly.

[ryan-sometimes]

I can't believe my STEM major ass laughed at this

[funeralcity]

babygirl i can be your little creepy crawly

[queerbeemc]

[2-point-5]

i like being a lesbian and all, but holy shit, men are so cool. i hope all men reading this have a wonderful day.

[basilpaste]

i like being gay and all, but holy shit, women are so cool!!!! i hope all women reading this have a wonderful day as well!!!!!!!!!

[2-point-5]

[image description: the epic handshake meme. one arm is labelled gay people and the other is labelled lesbians. in the middle it says “fuck yeah bro”. end id]

[2-point-5]

hey guys, quick reminder! this post is about uplifting other people!!! tags like ‘ugh, but men are gross lol’ or ‘op has never met a man’ are not welcome and will recieve an insta block! men are cool! women are cool! thank you for coming to my fucking ted talk! :-)

[lilboreddev-blog]

reblog if your name isn't Hans.

[thatblackwatchdouche-blog-blog]

2,121,566 people are not Hans and counting!

We’ll find you Hans.

[skadiyoko]

This post is scandalous.

[malevolentpooka-deactivated2015]

reblogging because hans cant. 

[comeinwiththarain-blog]

If you scroll past this I am going to assume your name is Hans.

[kintrafim-blog]

I couldn’t not reblog…

[jennareneecooper]

3,531,544 non-Han’s

[swanqueenandrizzles]

[anirtak420]

Oh hans, if only you could reblog this.

[ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew-ew]

3,697,721 non Han’s

[few-function-8059]

im not hans

[indigoatari]

by process of elimination we will find every Hans on this site

[flamingfoxninja]

Why the fuck are there 10 million people on this site??

[ikebanaka]

Where are you Hans

We’ll find you Hans

[basilpasil]

Come out, come out wherever you are Hans…

[twizzl-r]

hans can’t run forever.

[the-oog-deactivated20250911]

Hans, stop running, we will find you, it is inevitable. 

[goatpaste]

Attacka

[world-heritage-posts]

world heritage post

[goatpaste]

Oh good glad to hear

[goatpaste]

in honor of this becoming a world heritage post or whatever

a long awaited squeakquel i meant to make months and months ago

[goatpaste]

to everyone in the tags with the “homophonic bowser” “so long gay bowser” and  “love DOESNt win”

your all wrong, bowser is just already in a committed relationship

[goatpaste]

to everyone saying mario is a homewrecker, heres the truth

they just have the same taste

[goatpaste]

for some reason yall have stuck around this long so now your gonna get the MOST self indulgent sammi posting with the awnser to this

we go back to 2014 when i first watch that shitty live action mario movie, it was so bad i loved it so much. i knew it sucked but i was SO into it i loved it so much

and i specifically had a small crush on the lady who played the character big bertha, who was based on a one off comic character who was a giant cheep cheep who had a crush on mario. and in the movie was was also into mario. and let me tell you 14-15 year old cringe ass sammi drew SO much fanart of her as a mermaid who was in love with mario

so this one goes out to little crange ass baby nae nae sammi 

mario and his giant spikey mermaid gf

[datkooby]

[gayelectro]

Hey OP, I hope you know that this went from an amazing post to literally the best post on this site

[zoomiegender-deactivated2023033]

ok so.. i don’t wanna get out my laptop to make it so ppl can send me requests BUT i do wanna ask for a very specific type of a request

rb this or put in the notes a name youd like me to make a gender + flag based off of!

[nervoussquidward]

[vergak]

[sandersstudies]

I just heard a man in this coffee shop say "I had adult relations with a woman" and like sir wtf just say sex.

Anyway the story was about how the woman's separated husband tried to murder him on the street.

[sandersstudies]

He is now calling it "intercourse." Sir if you don't just say "fuck" I stg.

[idk-my-aesthetic]

I’m sorry the story was about what?

[sandersstudies]

This woman he consensually entered was apparently married but separated, and when he encountered her husband at a bar the guy started threatening him for sleeping with his wife and the first guy ended up dragging him out of a bar. This guy was probably six foot, covered in tats, with a huge red beard so like…. Idk who tried to mess with him in the first place but I’m confident he won this fight.

[wordsaremylife]

The guy...with tats... And a huge beard... couldn't/wouldn't say Fuck?!

[sandersstudies]

Maybe that should have been part of the original post — in fact, he actually did say fuck, as in “I fucking decked him in the face,” just not to refer to sex.

[wordsaremylife]

That makes this even funnier

[queer-nd-culture-is]

@/lavenderfeminist for your radfem blocklist

[normal-horoscopes]

A Story In Two Parts

[an-alarming-number-of-bees]

[daughter-of-sapph0]

Ben Shapiro is a week away from posting something like "cancel culture has gone mad. my wife left me and took the kids"

[flargen-and-what-deactivated202]

Like to charge reblog to cast, y'all!!