Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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I love fanfic’s tendency to put absurdly young people in jobs that they could not possibly have until their 40s or 50s. you can tell something has been written by a 14-year-old when a main character is like, 27 and a tenured professor at Brown. some lady is a conductor at 24. god bless.
#in fanfic u can buy a house on coffee shop wages even if u arent an astronaut by the ancient age of 22 #w fanfic anything is possible so jot that down (x)
i bet those colors only shrimp can see suck major ass
jealousy isn’t the way bro
The shrimp aren’t gonna have sex with you.
you take that back right fucking now
Unfortunate news… scientists have discovered that shrimp do not see “extra colors”.
We thought that they did because they have 12 different molecules for photoreceptors, whereas humans have only 3. BIG difference, right??
Nope. Turns out that they simply do not have the mental wherewithal to blend, and so needed a separate receptor for each color. The human brain adds color emissions together to create a singular representative color, like reverse engineered printing. Shrimp can’t do that. They can’t take light emitting “green” and light emitting “red” and come back with “yellow”, like we do. They have to have a receptor for yellow, and are relatively horrible at distinguishing shades of colors.
So at the end of the day, not only do shrimp not have “extra colors”… they see less than we do. Shrimp can’t see the fake colors :(
i don’t normally do this, but I’ve been wanting to make a post about “shrimp colors“ for a while now, and this is the perfect excuse, because while the comment above is partially true, it leaves out a bunch of stuff that make mantis shrimps and the way they see still really, really cool, so i’m gonna cannibalize an old twitter thread and share stuff here!
as @scififantasystuff said, their 12 color receptors work to register independent colors instead of mixing the signals in their brain, but this means that they are able to register colors directly in the eye, instead of having to send it to the brain for decoding like we do! While this does lower their ability to differentiate colors—ranking worse than humans, bees, and butterflies on color specificity—it makes them much better at registering color quickly. instead of comparing the signals from 3 different channels, their eye are described as working more like a satellite, pinging one ‘box’ of colors out of a kind of spreadsheet in their brain to register color much MUCH quicker than us, but with less specificity.
HOWEVER! They can still see in spectra we can’t! Only 8 of their 16 light receptors are dedicated to the human range of color– 4 of them are for seeing in ultraviolet, which many other animals (like bees as stated above) can also see in, but generally only have 1 receptor to cover it (likely the 1-4 work the same way as the 3-8 for color) The last four are for seeing light polarization, which i don’t fully understand the physics of, but seems to be a measure of reflectivity and light direction, but here’s the wild part: mantis shrimp can see in SIX types of polarization! six!! they can see horizontal, vertical, two types of diagonal, and two types of ‘circular’ polarization, and are the only known animal in the world to be able to see this circular polarized light. in an attempt to understand the purpose of this, a team of scientists created a camera to pick up on this polarization, which you can see more of in this article here!
Here’s a screenshot from that video, in which you can see what a mantis shrimp would see when looking at another mantis shrimp:
[ image description: two boxes side by side with a bar at the far end showing a dark blue to deep red gradient, in which the deep red takes up the entire top half of the bar. box one is labeled “Haptosquilla Trispinosa” in the top corner and “Colour” in the bottom corner. It shows the front half of a mantis shrimp poking out of a shrimp-sized hole in a yellowish-brown coral or rock. box two is labeled “DoLP” in the bottom corner, and is almost completely black, speckled with various shades of blues and a couple greens corresponding to brighter sections of the colored image. however, right in the middle of the picture around the mouth area of the shrimp, are two oblong spots of the deep red of the bar on the left with an edge of bright reds, oranges, and yellows, much like an infrared camera. below the two pictures is text that says “The camera detects the degree of polarization (DoLP) of the light reflecting off of various sea creatures, the same way the mantis shrimp sees them. / end description. ]
Those two bright red spots are a way that mantis shrimp can communicate with other mantis shrimp through their own secret polarized light! how cool is that!
It’s also cool to point out that because of the way that their eyes are set up, each individual eye of the mantis shrimp can see in trinocular vision, as opposed to us needing BOTH eyes to see in binocular vision. each eye can gauge depth independently and can focus on three different objects at once, meaning, yes, a mantis shrimp could theoretically be focusing on 6 different places and registering that information in 3 different spectra simultaneously at any given second! to say that they just “don’t have the mental wherewithal” to register color misses out on so many aspects of this creature that we’re still trying to figure out! their eyes independently evolved an apparatus that works like a DVD player, but infinitely more advanced than our own! these are the same critters that can shatter glass with a punch the force of a rifle bullet!
maybe they can’t differentiate colors the way we can, but their eyes are still undoubtedly some of the most fascinating on our planet, and can still see all sorts of secrets that we can only dream to recreate with technology… thank you for coming to my shrimp ted talk…..
Tsundere anime girls are OUT, tsundere ancient dragons with unimaginable power are IN
Honestly I think one of the other reasons why I hate goyim making those “haha yeah Jews hate G-d and wanna fistfight G-d” is that it often comes off as though the only reason we would be respected or liked is because y’all don’t see us as actually worshipping or loving G-d. Our presence and worth within leftist/liberal spaces is entirely hinged on whether we are the Super Kewl Jews Who Hate G-d And Say Funny Anti-G-d Slogans or if we’re on the other end of Those Evil Chassidim Weirdos Who Are Obviously Different. Once Jewish people are loudly and proudly devoted to G-d, in awe of G-d and of Torah, that level of superficial niceties is taken away from us.
So no. I don’t want to hear about how Jewish people “will fight G-d behind a 7/11″ anymore. I want to hear about how Jewish people will fight fascists while singing hymns; I want to hear about how Jewish people have celebrated and worshipping and sung to G-d despite the thousands of years of persecution; I want to hear about Jewish families blatantly and proudly passing on Jewish scripture and thought down to their children; I want to hear about Jewish LGBT people who are the loudest voices at shul; I want to hear about Jewish people who are unabashedly Jewish and G-d-loving and religious and I want to see y’all still respect us and see us for the diverse and beautiful people we are.
This is such a cool idea. What other info could it be? Careers, hobbies, economic status, lifelong ambitions? Orientation, single/taken/etc status? Insect-style role in the hive (worker/drone etc)?
If human languages are based on primitive monkey-brain ideas of whether or not the person we’re talking about is a potential mate, then what different considerations might an alien race make?
Maybe they have two drastically different body types that need to pair off to defend from predators. Maybe their civilization depends on cultivating plants that grow best when sung to, and a range of different vocal tones per household is best. Maybe some are nocturnal and some are diurnal.
What else??
pronouns are based on age and they change throughout an individual’s life
*translated from alien*
Hello everybody! This is Xarthaborf, he’s-”
“Actually, it’s she now.”
“Oh my god! You finally turned 500! Congrats!”
XD Fantastic, I love it!
I’ve read through the suggestions and I’m a little surprised I’m the only one thinking of this:
Pronouns based on proximity.
What’s better at saying “that one” than saying exactly where they are? Different pronouns for if they’re 5 feet away vs. 20 feet away. Did you turn your back on somebody in the middle of a conversation? They have different pronouns now.
After a while, humans try to maintain the same distance from others when conversing (lol try doing that while walking together) so their translators don’t freak out on them.
I presume there might be a completely different set of nuanced ‘pronouns’ when describing inanimate objects, which makes everything even more confusing to the humans.
How useful.
#You know how you can describe a chess board with b7 or e5 and everybody knows what that means? I’m imagining something similar Except each position has a different set of pronouns Or at least a different pre- or suffix from each other Maybe children use pronouns without the -fixes until they can understand the nuance Human translator tech is still rough And doesn’t understand the nuance So occasionally it’ll run into a prefix or suffix it doesn’t know And just leave it there Iks-them Or they-rith Because it’s not gendered pronouns
That would be fascinating. I imagine the humans would have quite a time wrapping their brains around it! There’s probably a “position unknown/unspecified” pronoun that the humans want to use all the time (like “they”), but the aliens insist that nope it sounds wrong to use just that one.
“Why did you say ‘iks’ when rith is right in front of you? Do we need to break out the children’s educational materials and start from the beginning?”
Okay, but based on relationship proximity.
Different pronouns depending on whether you’re talking about a parent, a sibling, partner, a lover, a friend, an aquaintance, a coworker… imagine the drama potential.
People switching up to friend or lover pronouns too early in a relationship and getting rejected.
Stranger pronouns being literally only okay if you’re using them to describe somebody you just met and will never see again, because any closer degree of relationship than that will have its own pronouns, and not using them is a calculated insult.
Specific pronouns to refer to mortal enemies that pretty much nobody ever uses outside of works of fiction, because using them to describe somebody is like openly admitting that you’re probably planning to kill that person.
This concept possibly getting watered down though as time goes on. Like how swear words like ‘damn’ and ‘hell’ have kind of lost their power over the years, young people start using mortal enemy pronouns to refer to like, people who are mildly annoying, or public figures they don’t like (both of which previously had their own pronouns). Older generations getting really offended by this.
Separate pronouns for fictional characters.
A classic sitcom trope is somebody assuming they’re being referred to with certain pronouns that suggest dramatic changes in their relationship with the person talking about them, only for them to find out at the end of the episode that the person was actually referring to somebody else.
Everybody knowing the moment shit has gone down because “I just saw Skrith and Jarn in the cafeteria this morning. I know you said friend seemed okay last night, but you won’t believe which pronouns friend used to refer to enemy-of-friend!”
Actually, pronouns denoting other people’s relationships to people in relation to you. You might not know X that well, but they’re your friend Y’s close friend, so you can either use aquaintance or friend-of-friend pronouns.
Sibling, parent, child, cousin, etc. pronouns originally only being used for blood family or adopted children, but gradually getting used to refer to any relationship that fills that role in your life. “Oh no, child isn’t actually a relative, but I looked after child while child’s parents were on research trips, and friends were okay with child using parent pronouns for me if child wanted to.”
Human translation devices really not being able to keep up with this, because how the fuck is the software supposed to know how close you are to this person? Humans who actually try and learn the language not faring much better, because not only are there a lot of pronouns to learn, but the nuances of when exactly you’re meant to change are very culturally specific.
Aliens meanwhile being kind of horrified that most humans will use the same two or three pronouns to refer to everyone they encounter. Do they all hate each other? Or, conversely, are they all super close? What is wrong with these people?
They end up just straight up creating a new pronoun meaning ‘member of X species’ for all other species to use to refer to them, because the alternative is having fistfights break out on ships because the humans don’t understand why it’s so fucking offensive to refer to a coworker with aquaintance pronouns.
side note: a lot of these points are kind of similar to subtleties you already get in real human languages – for instance, Japanese honorifics and pronouns convey a lot of subtle nuances about relationships between the speaker, the listener/s and a third party, and lots of pronouns are predominantly used in fiction (although mainly because they’re somewhat more archaic/too high a register to use in every day speech)
similarly, proximity pronouns sounds like a logical extension of determiners like “this/that/yon” – in Spanish and a lot of Romance languages, the pronouns (e.g. él/ella) and definite articles (el/la) actually derive originally from [gendered] determiners indicating proximity in Latin (ille/illa)
there are Indigenous languages in Australia (e.g. Guugu Yimithirr) that use cardinal languages instead of relative directions, so that you have to change whether you’re talking about NESW instead of left/right by remembering which direction is which and keeping track of things & people moving and turning
with all that said: respect to everyone above, i frankly would love the idea of more aliens in fiction drawing on and being more relative to non-Western cultures compared to ya default Anglophone/Western European set of linguistic concepts, and i desperately want to see some of these concepts implemented in scifi media. but uh. please be careful about going “wow!!! this linguistic feature would be so alien and inhuman lol how weird” because actually no, often there are people in the world whose languages do have those features
I can tell you right now that I grew up mixing up people’s pronouns because my parents mixed up pronouns because English is like their third or fourth language, but the first one that GENDERED pronouns. Bengali doesn’t gender pronouns. Its second-person pronouns (“you”) can indicate respect/age/rank, third person is neutral. Chinese also doesn’t gender pronouns in verbal speech (but it does in the written form). Neither does Hungarian. You’d be amazed how many immigrants constantly screw up pronouns and refer to women as “he” or men as “she” or just use “they” to be on the safe side, because they just…don’t automatically refer to people by gender like we native speakers of English and other Western/Central European languages do.
No one is talking about the true victims of the Suez Canal.
https://bad-dragon.com/products/kelvin
Unfortunately, this tweet is fake. I saw it previously including an image of said items, and that product DOES exist, and was tweeted about, but there are no tweets on that account saying they were aboard that ship, nor making this joke. The only one was just announcing the release of them. I know, it’s disappointing, I wanted it to be real too.
"ooh you hate cops but who are you gonna call when you get robbed?" uhhhhh your moms house? a great tragedy has befallen me and i need to have sex immediately
Every time someone’s like “who are you gonna call when you get robbed?”
1. Know how I know you’ve never been robbed?
2. I am going to call my insurance company and file a claim, the only usefulness a cop has at this point is generating a report number for said insurance company to refer to
3. Seriously all a cop’s gonna do after establishing that the robber/burglar/whoever isn’t there anymore is say “what do you want me to do about it?” and leave
Literally had the catalytic converters cut out of my car with a saw and this is exactly how it went down. The cop outright said not to expect anything from their investigation. And that advice is more accurate than the cop realizes! Not only are they not trained detectives, but they’re lazy assholes who just like having power and guns. Literally the mother of the person asking is more likely to solve the case as long as she puts in some effort, cause that’s more than the cops do.
No but moralizing about how you don’t deserve the vaccine yet is greatly reducing vaccination numbers it’s not your job to worry about if you’re “stealing” a vaccine from someone else there is a National supply and when it’s your turn it’s your turn. Refusing to get vaccinated is not going to magically vaccinate a bed bound rural person. It’s just going to get vaccine doses thrown in the garbage. God.
Every vaccine dose ups our herd immunity. Every vaccine dose potentially frees up treatment for other people who might need it. Get the vaccine! There’s no “selfish” reason to protect yourself and everyone else from a deadly virus.
Hey, if you’re in America, at least, Dr. B is a great solution here! It’s a site where you sign up with your phone number and zip code and they’ll tell you if any locations nearby are doing extra vaccinations!
Why might they be allowing others in not on the list? Because those doses spoil! They have limited shelf life, so it’s actually really important we use them before that happens! And if that means saying “okay open call for anyone who wants them just to make sure they get used” most places are saying “then that’s what we’ll do should there be leftover doses/cancelled appointments.”
Getting one of these doses, even if you are not in an “eligible group” makes sure that dose doesn’t go bad! That’s one more person vaccinated than if you just said “I’m not a high enough priority.” One more person vaccinated is less chance of people who can’t get vaccinated catching it. It’s one less person who will have a chance of dying. It’s a good thing, no matter how you slice it, when the alternative is that dose just doesn’t get used!
My mom remarked recently that of all the things she failed to anticpate about living into the next millenium, the funniest and most confusing one is that neither my sister nor I have a single goddamn friend with a conventional name, and furthmore, she occasionally has to stop and ask “Which ‘Squid’ are we talking about again?”
What’s funny is that we have no friends with conventional names for the exact same reason, but in opposite directions. I have an online presence where I know all my friends, even the ones I’ve known for over a decade and whose house I’ve been to, as their usernames first and only, because we’re using them to keep our online and public lives separate. A lot of my friends are trans, and only out online so for their safety I have gone out of my way to avoid learning deadnames or mixing any IRL identities they haven’t expressly stated can be shared.
My sister worked as a summer camp counselor and youth educator and everyone went by fake names specifically so
1. The campers wouldn’t look them up on Facebook and see pics of the adult counselors, well, acting like adults- having a beer, complaining about dating etc.
2. Because the state she worked in had mandatory reporting laws if they even suspected abuse, and it’s a lot harder for a kid to identify you to a vengeful abusive parent if they don’t know your real name.
So my sister and her friends all have second names to keep their public and online lives separate, but this time it’s the IRL people using the second name.
Which means that, independently, we each developed a friendship with someone who goes by “Squid”.
Mom has helpfully pointed out that in addition to the Two Squids:
I know a Spider, my sister has a Tarantula and they are both in the process of getting doctorates, one in genetics the other in robotics and her brain has helpfully conflated them into a single budding mad scientitst who is building Mutant Cyborg Arachnids.
She used to be able to keep track of who knew who because I had the large international cadre, and Sister’s friends were all from the PNW. Last year, Sister and a number of her friends moved internationally so now the Australians, Germans and Irish are starting to run together for her.
We haven’t even told her that one of my French People, “Ponds” has met and is kinda-sorta dating Sister’s International-Master’s-Degree-In-France “Frog”.
I inherited my night-owl tendencies from my mom so sometimes she would come down, see me on the computer and ask “How are the Australians?”. My sister has since moved to Australia and likes to call in and ask “So How are the Americans?”
“Which one of you has the Porcupine again?”
This situation is FURTHER compounded by my Dad having both Theater People Who-All-Have-The-Same-Six-Names-Because-They-Were-Born-In-The-50′s-So-They-Have-To-Be-Referred-To-By-Roles-Mom-Has-Seen-Them-Play-Onstage, AND his Civil Activist Friends that got started in the 60′s when it was OK to change your name to something like “Virtue” or “Pasadena Orange Blossom” so recently “Falstaff” is in a facebook fight with “Rolling Stone” about Colorado Weed Law.
“I couldn’t imagine trying to explain this to your grandpa. He barely understood email. Grandma though, she wouldn’t have blinked at two names. Probably would have suggested you have another three and attempt to defraud the IRS.”
anyway i’m reading this nyt article on how cops ‘mishandled’ protests last year and one of the major takeaways is that they didn’t have the equipment or training to do mass arrests
the term “mistakes” does so much heavy lifting in this article and articles on state violence in general.
If we ask someone to calm down and instead they get angry and beat us up, do we call that a “mistake”? What was their mistake? They made the point they wanted to make. Those pigs beat, abducted and killed whoever they wanted. They attacked innocent civilians and journalists with weapons you’re not even allowed to use in a war. Everything they did, they chose to do.
got any cursed facts about falcons?? 🥺👉👈
compared to hawks, falcons have shorter and weaker talons and shorter beaks! this, combined with a lighter overall build, means that falconkind is really badly unsuited to do the hawk/eagle/owl thing where they just plunge out of the sky and stab a rabbit to death with their feet.
so what they do instead is fly really high in the air, keeping an eye out for unwary birds they could get the drop on, and then they DROP. and as they drop, they curl their talon into a fist, which they use to strike their unwary prey at speeds well in excess of a hundred miles per hour. (this either stuns or outright kills the unlucky target)
and this method works so well that they can even take down birds much larger than themselves, like ducks!
so basically,
FALCON
PUNCH
now why don’t we give that a slo-mo action replay?
GET WRECKED.
light was such a loser cuz he didnt just google the 100 richest people and start writing down names
how would you feel if you woke up tomorrow and find out exactly 100 of the world’s richest people died of heart attacks at exactly noon universal time. can you imagine the theories. light is absolutely a loser for not doing this
Wow it's almost like we realized that saying harmful things can negatively impact other people to the extreme point of depression, anxiety, self harm, or even suicide (especially in poc and queer communities).
It's almost like we fucking realized that words have impact, and if words didn't have impact nobody would ever speak.
And it's almost like we grew tf up and realized that "sticks and stones" is meant for when people call us shallow things like dumb or ugly, not for when people are commiting actual hate crimes against someone.
There’s also a difference between “You’re a poopyhead” and “the Nazis were right let’s kill all jews.” There’s a difference between a 6 year old saying “I hate you!” over his friend not sharing a toy and a fully grown adult saying “You don’t deserve to have healthcare because <insert stupid bigotry here>” and both voting accordingly and trying to get others to as well.
There’s also a difference between the people saying that spouting racism is violence and the people who say being called out for racism is violence.
Not realistic he got a reply after submitting his résumé
Not realistic: his resume actually touched the hands of a living person
OP forgot the best part
did he try to stab her?
No, he was trying to cut off his pinkie finger as an apology.
The running joke of the manga is that he used to be a high-ranking yakuza enforcer who’s having trouble adapting to civilian life. Hence her shocked face when she saw the decorations and the creepy way he sang “Happy Birthday”; it’s a traditional birthday celebration for your oyabun, not your wife.
oh my god, i just realized, this means he sees her
AS THE BOSS IN THE RELATIONSHIP
when people say malewife and girlboss this is what they should mean
