wallacepolsom
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

⁂
Xuebing Du
YOU ARE THE REASON
trying on a metaphor

roma★
🪼
Sade Olutola

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
$LAYYYTER
Cosimo Galluzzi

Janaina Medeiros
occasionally subtle

@theartofmadeline
NASA

#extradirty

shark vs the universe

pixel skylines

oozey mess
seen from United States
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seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States
seen from Peru

seen from Italy

seen from United States
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seen from Malaysia
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seen from France
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seen from Malaysia
@king-rhys
fuck it 10 pm post we like to party
this video feels like seeing an old friend for the first time in a decade
"I asked chatgpt-"
I don't respect you
truly the most american thing is Big Drink. more than late stage capitalism, more than an unparalleled cultural focus on individualism, more than 9/11 jokes
what binds all americans together culturally is Big Drink
and you might be saying "is this fat shaming" or "but mayor bloomberg outlawed Big Drink in nyc" or "gays are so annoying about their iced coffee" or some other dumb comment but no open your minds, Big Drink isn't just sugary or caffeinated beverages
every day i see one of you hydration bitches (affectionate) on the train with a water bottle so big a toddler could drown in it. that too is Big Drink. we literally invented a bigger beer can (tall boy) in wisconsin in the 60s in the service of Big Drink
anyway i never feel more american then when i have Big Drink in my hands
“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted
#tapping the reblog button with utmost care because i’m handling a historical artifact (via @malarkiness)
holy shit OP is not only still active but is still making absolutely banger posts in this exact style 11 years later
A 2025 update
fixed it
my biggest fear
idk if i told the full story on here but i signed up for a research study where they were testing a new opioid, and it was supposed to be up to 5 injections increasing the dose to see what people could tolerate
i got the first dose and almost immediately fainted. they had to call in a whole medical team and it was a huge fucking deal
i was kicked out of the study and got a phone call later where they were supposed to tell me what the drug was, so i could avoid it in the future. they told me it was saline water. a placebo. i fainted from the placebo effect.
anyway, it's been a few months and i just got an email from the same department asking me to be a research participant in a new study: testing the effects of open-label placebo.
open label placebo is when the subjects and the researchers all know it's a placebo. they're testing the power of my mind. my power to imagine anything.
i like to think that they chose me for this specifically based on their past experience with me. "get the guy who fainted like a little bitch boy from saline water." anyway i just submitted all my info and i'm looking forward to getting started.
why are terrible celebrity imagines so funny. how do i find more of these without suffering the indignity of searching “bts imagines”
more of these please
STOP CENSORING YOURSELF ON THIS WEBSITE. FUCK SHIT SEX MURDER ALCOHOL DRUGS FAGGOT DYKE QUEER TRANS BITCH SLUT WHORE SEX SEX SEX SEX!!!!!!!!!!!
OK OK. UH UHHHH..... KILL?
I can’t render metals to save my life. 😔
But I do love Papa V
What's your jacking off technique
get cropped idiot
Did you just circumcise my post??
dual wielding
this blog hates donald trump
Look how many people hate him. I’m pretty damn happy about that 😁😁😁😁😁😁
I’ve never reblogged something so fast
musk is going to die in a Tesla explosion in 6 months after sticking his nose where it doesn't belong and we will never get a conclusive answer on whether it was a CIA car bomb or just a normal Tesla malfunction
Like to charge, reblog to cast
His face when he says “nickel” is great! XD
This reminds me of my little girl because her pants never have pockets
Haha Daddy you’re right! I neverrrrr have pockets, but that’s why you have them! You’re my pockets Daddy. ♥
What the fucking shit
all offense intended but some of yalls ideas for making a “better” star wars film are hot garbage
49-minute yoda fuck scene
you are the exception