Kiwiria's Tumblr

Still trying to figure this thing out...

[softichill]

I think abt this tiktok all the time

[thesadcyborg9million]

Diversity hire bryson ur absolutely slaying

[sacred-portal]

[cargopantsman]

[nojamnojelly]

[argentavis]

hey do you mind grabbing joseph's coat for him? yeah its the red and yellow and green and brown and scarlet and black and ochre and peach and ruby and olive and violet and fawn and lilac and gold and chocolate and mauve and cream and crimson and silver and rose and azure and lemon and russet and gray and purple and white and pink and orange and blue one

[cleo-fox]

Writing tips:

“You feel the bulge in his pants” - implies that you are feeling some guy’s penis, may be sexy depending on context

“You feel the bugle in his pants” - implies that this guy has a military horn in his pants, invites confusing questions like why does he have that and how big are his pockets

[maple-seed]

Both options convey that he's horny

[cleo-fox]

How dare you be funnier than me on my own post

[unclefather]

[psych-is-the-name]

[shinekocreator]

Okay, this is actually funny

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[chryza]

Debating silently showing this to one of the flight attendants while boarding

[chryza]

I SHOWED IT TO MY FLIGHT ATTENDANT WHEN HE GAVE ME MY COOKIES AND HE LAUGHED SO HARD HE TOOK MY PHONE TO SHOW IT TO THE OTHER FLIGHT ATTENDANT

[bippysaurus-rex]

I don’t know how you got a good grade in being a passenger on an airline but that’s a totally normal thing to achieve and I’m not seething with jealousy at all.

[thecraftgremlin]

Where’s that one post that’s like Reasons Why My Wife Cried This Week and when are we gonna get a fanfic of that but Ryland Grace.

[stargirl-and-potts]

Reasons my human has cried:

* New student, very small. Grace said it was pebble. Pebble is small Earth rock. Pebble likes name.

* He found out Eridians have no gender rules.

* Students brought him mineral sample. After he stopped crying he said he loves show-and-tell game. Human naming conventions oddly literal.

* I told him Earthsun grew bright.

* I took him up atop atmosphere bypass elevator to look at stars.

* He woke up from nap and found me still with him. I did not wait on his chest as I should; he says I am heavy like “elephant” and he “couldn’t breathe.” I laid my arm over him instead, kept him feeling safe. He said my “cuddle” was warm.

* Before class he heard young ones singing.

* He has plants in house from sprouts on ship. Plant grew “bud.”

* Engineers got water temperature better. He took off shoes and stood in water, sighing. He didn’t care about pants getting damp. Cried until shirt was also damp. Humans very endlessly wet.

* He missed “Doritos.”

* Adrian helped food scientists make taumoeba dried paste. Made it crunchy after heating. We fused it into triangle form. Told him it was Tauritos. That made him laugh-cry. Laugh-cry is rare and precious.

* He remembered Eridians have no gender rules.

* We made him celebration outfit. Used metals he calls pretty. He can see frequencies named “colorful” and “shiny.” These make humans happiest.

* I gave him hug when he wasn’t expecting it. Easier to hug close now with exosuit. Hug when Grace sitting down so he does not fall over.

* Told him to think long time, stay with me as long as he can.

[marta-bee]

YES PLEASE AND THANK YOU

[a-mel0n]

reblog if you’ve had an online friendship that’s lasted more than 2 years

[myjetpack]

An early Halloween cartoon for Guardian Books

[catgirl-catboy]

What I legit thought the punchline was gonna be.

[computer-wizard]

but what if

[jan-pi-suli-ala]

fucking spot the difference game

[damnhotpocket]

Gema.piano on instagram

Why are all music teachers like this 😭😭😭

[thememedaddy]

[homunculus-argument]

You dig a big enough hole that water can stay in, it becomes a pond. And once it's been a pond for long enough, fish somehow appear. Even though it's not connected to any other water - hell, consider all the lakes that aren't connected to any other water. How the fuck are there fish? Where do they come from?

One day, something in space is going to look at humans the same way. You go to a new galaxy and there's freaking humans in there, like they just spontaneously manifest on random planets that have the ability to sustain them. All you need is an atmosphere with enough oxygen, some form of water, and that's pretty much all you need before they seem to just pop out of the ground and start terraforming it.

The mystery of the lake fish has been solved, by the way. It's waterfowl. Much like the birds that eat seeds and spread them around, waterfowl consume roe from the water, and while the number of fertilised fish eggs that pass through the digestive system of a duck or wild goose alive and unharmed may be small, it's not zero. A goose will shit in the lake water, and through comes the roe. It happens just often enough that lakes and ponds become - and remain - populated with fish.

Humans don't pop up on unknown planets and and unreachable galaxies on purpose. They couldn't get in there any more than they could get out of there, they have no choice but to claim the most viable-looking planet they can reach and start terraforming it. But how did they even get there?

You see, every once in a while an unfortunate human spaceship gets swallowed by a cosmic duck

[mightymo63]

Some fish are also just able to straight up walk on land

[homunculus-argument]

"They just walked there" is now my favourite theory of "how are lakes populated with fish".

[kedreeva]

Floods also move fish around. A couple days ago some business in Michigan ended up with sturgeon on their lawn because of a flooded river. Presumably a big flood will sometimes deposit some fish in places they weren't.

Cosmic disasters stranding human travelers on planets in ways they can't then escape the planet after isn't out of the question.

But I would like to consider carcinization as a possibility also. Sometimes no earth human has been to the planet and yet. Humans.

[earhartsease]

sturgeon on my lawn? it's more likely than you think dot jpeg

[yuriwinged]

the prince has begun practicing curtseying in the mirror. which could mean nothing.

[heydocverdant]

we have good news and bad news, my liege. the good news is that we now know what that curtsying was about: you will be pleased to know that, after several heartfelt conversations between your child, the court jesters and a myriad of singing woodland creatures, you are now the parent of a proud and joyful new princess. the bad news is that, due to a series of events related to the dragon-sized hole in her bedchamber wall,

[illmoraineakoi]

I love the insinuation that the second the princess realized she was a girl and thus actually a princess, the dragon was there. That thing wasted no time. It heard "princess" and was like "I need no further invitation, here I come."

Gender affirmed by Dragon. Amazing.

[heydocverdant]

pretty sure you’re literally the only person who understood my vision on this accursed post

[jeansbookshelf-deactivated20250]

I got 60 out of 1000 😂

1000 Books You May Have Actually Read

Based on the number of ratings each book has on Goodreads. And if you haven't read them, maybe you can use for a literature bucket list.

[tinyasafirefly]

Anyone who says they’ve read all 1000 is a liar because one of them is a huge cookbook and no one is actively joy reading that.

[mbrainspaz]

with some of these it’s like “fuck, I did read that,” and with some it’s like “Oh fuck, I did read that.”

I got 99, but I counted a few that I had only mostly-read before deciding I didn’t like them and never finishing them.

[madlori]

I got 250, but my total is significantly buoyed by the fact that I’ve read almost all of Stephen King’s books AND almost every Shakespeare play.

I’m amused that Dan Brown’s other books are on this list but DaVinci Code is NOT, lolol.

[kiwiria]

385 :-)

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[teathattast]

[daywalker27]

I'm not crying, you're crying.

[netherworldpost]

I recently had a similar experience.

I hope you have a similar experience, and soon, and with the same result.

It will change how you look at everything.

[kiwiria]

That is *so* wholesome and totally made me cry!