The Guide // Short Story
Don’t worry, little one.
Shh, it’s okay.
You’re with me now.
You wanted an opportunity so that is exactly what I am offering you.
Look at the clock - all of its hands are static. There is no “time”. You float carelessly in an ocean of both light and darkness, both peace and war, both silence and noise. You are capable of every emotion known to mankind and sometimes are punctured by each of them attempting to conquer you, yet you feel empty. Your grey core holds more strength than the iridescent rainbow striking arrows at your vessel.
I created all of this for you.
A series of poorly-timed decisions resulted in your demise. Humans always do that. How could you complain when your very mind has led you to exist in such a state? This is all your doing. You tell yourself that you had no other options, ever, at any point. That is so pathetic. You know nothing about the world.
There is always another option. There is at least another infinity of ways in which any decision can go... Yet you love romanticising your mistakes and limiting yourselves to what you think is possible. Humour me, human – what does that mean? What is possible?
Do you perhaps mean... ethical? No, it can’t be that. When have humans cared about morals? You just do not want to be caught. You fear the physical consequences of your actions, but you feel no remorse for moral outcomes. Your finger may tremble on the trigger, but you will aim and shoot if necessary. Humans are selfish beings.
Do you mean... maybe... comfortable? Hmm... that sounds right to me.
It’s making me laugh. You’re making me laugh.
How much are you willing to fight for something you want? How radically are you willing to think in order to be free? I wish you saw my face right now, but I suppose hearing my voice will do, although I must warn you that I am quite handsome. Try not to fall in love with me – I am all you have, after all. Humans do that a lot, too.
Uncountable, untraceable voices scream. Are all of these yours? Oh, no, I remember now. I made it so everyone you have ever disappointed with your insignificance resents you. They often render you incapable of making this timeline advance and stretch your existence continuously into nothingness. They always scream.
Always.
Don’t worry, little one.
This isn’t Hell. Hell would not be this easy on you.
You seem fearful? What’s wrong? Are you not enjoying reality...? That upsets me. I tried so hard to create this for you. It’s what you wanted! You craved freedom, so I offered you emptiness to transform into whatever you desire. You craved space, so I destroyed all the limits of spatial dimensions and offered you infinity. You wanted peace and quiet and I... well... no, I didn’t give you that. That would have ruined everything.
I want you to grow. How are you still not happy?!
Stop screaming and learn from this. You are so annoying sometimes... It’s giving me a headache. Stop screaming for one moment. Good. Focus. You have it in you to design your paradise. How come you are not doing that? You possess all the resources. You have all the time in the world since there is no time in this world.
I did that for you, remember?
There is nothing your mind cannot create and yet you choose to be scared of your surroundings. Don’t let fear conquer you. Do something. You know you can fabricate anything you want... right? Have I somehow not made that clear?
I suppose I could help you... but that’s no fun. I want to see your true power.
Limitlessness does not equal freedom. You must have learnt this by now. The longer you exist, the more you can create. Fragments of existence gradually piece themselves together into an oddly shaped, braided structure. Infinity confines itself, and you, taking the shape of a bedroom. Guided by your strongest desire, you have created your domain; four thin walls and a crumbling ceiling mark its borders with no exit.
I don’t understand... Do you want to be trapped here?
Your imagination builds endless bookshelves filled with extravagant fantasies. Several quiet clicks announce the emergence of a small coffee table and pictures on the walls, guiding you into a magnificent illusion of reality outside of your being. You nod in satisfaction; it is not a lot, but you do not possess that much power – not yet, at least. You truly enjoy limiting yourself. Still, you are now surrounded by everything you love. You seem happy.
That makes me happy, too. You are learning how to use your mind.
A homely breath invites you in its void, begging for a much bigger force to comfortably control it. Your eyes shakily draw lines around it as you realise, more and more, that you lack artistic confidence. Still, it takes the shape of a dream – a silhouette only you can distinguish from darkness.
“Come with me,” its echo of all languages bounces off the corners of your medium. You gracefully extend your hand towards it, with a bright smile on your face. It welcomes you into its warm, loving, fictional arms. I can hear you sighing in relief.
I see. You want someone else to save you.
You’re channelling your energy in the wrong direction. That’s pathetic. Save yourself.
I’m getting rid of everything. We’re starting over.
Fragments of existence gradually piece themselves together into an oddly shaped, braided structure. Infinity confines itself, and you, taking the shape of a bedroom. Guided by your strongest desire, you have created your domain; four thin walls and a crumbling ceiling mark its borders with a tiny door in the shape of a window. Your imagination builds endless bookshelves filled with extravagant fantasies. Several quiet clicks announce the emergence of a small coffee table and pictures on the walls, guiding you into a magnificent illusion of reality outside of your being. You nod in satisfaction; it is not a lot, but you seem happy. You spend all of your time reading, blissfully ignoring the exit next to you.
You cannot be serious – you made almost the same thing. You even made me narrate it the same way.
Stop telling me that it does not take luxury to please you. That is not the point. Yes, I understand, you are comfortable. I don’t care. Perhaps I was not clear enough. You, alone, are capable of creating anything you desire. You, alone, have all the resources.
Do better.
You sigh. I must be annoying you. Don’t worry, you are annoying me, too. Your hands shake as you point to the structure of your bedroom, reinforcing its construction. You seem content to have removed the obvious safety hazard. I am unsure whether that truly worried you; I would not have allowed anything to hurt you. You must’ve understood that.
A warm breeze travels the room, spontaneously stopping in various corners, in the shape of outdated pieces of furniture. I did not create wind – you made that yourself. That is rather impressive, I must admit. A vintage kitchenette extends the size of your domain with the appropriate appliances. You now have a dining table and chairs. A starry canopy rests above your oak bed frame and silk bedsheets.
Look how beautifully you’ve decorated.
I’m getting rid of everything. Try again.
Stop asking such pointless questions. I did not make you start over because “you did not have a bathroom”. That is not the point. Do you seriously not see what you’re doing wrong?
This is the point humans usually grow desperate – not you. You seem awfully confident you will get it right this time. Be careful. It’s your last chance. How patient do you think I am? Believe it or not, I have other things that require my attendance. This infinity may revolve around you, but not all of them do.
A worrying quake puts the lack of time in its place. Sturdy walls of passion arise with musicality. The exterior of your mansion is painted with pure gold and the garden houses a paradise of flora. You blink and overwhelm the rooms with luxurious furniture. Every two walls host antique masterpieces and you have given yourself, yet again, the endless library of your dreams.
Do you truly need all of this?
A copy of “The Great Gatsby” lies on the table next to you as you give life to a roaring crowd to be at your services. At least it makes sense now... You’re not even that creative. On buffet tables, garnished with glistening hors d’oeuvre, spiced baked –
No. We’re not doing that. Write your own story.
You kept the starry canopy, but now embroidered it with golden threads. The vanity opposing your bed displays your nature. You laugh with pride as you sit unbothered on the edge of your bed, bathing your eyes in the triumph you managed to create. Beautiful, isn’t it?
Look how stupidly strong you’ve become.
That’s too bad.
What did you say? You want me to come over for some tea? I suppose I could show myself to you and tell you how well you’ve done. That is what you want to hear, after all, right? You want me to praise you. You already know that you have surpassed yourself, but you want to hear it from me. What an unhealthy attachment this is.
You’re pissing me off.
Sit down.
My fingers curl around the petite handle of the teacup in front of me. The fluid is quite magical. I am impressed, but I will remain quiet. My eyebrows have probably given that away, as I see you smile playfully. I seriously hope you are not doing that human thing of yours.
Allow me to wipe that smug look off of your face.
You craved freedom, so I offered you emptiness to transform into whatever you desire. You craved space, so I destroyed all the limits of spatial dimensions and offered you infinity. You complained. You screamed a lot, too. It was rather terrifying. I told you exactly what to do, but I was not going to hand it out to you. I explicitly said you are capable of everything.
Why didn’t you listen to me?
You started small, with a room and a coffee table. You built on that, but it appeared to be because I told you to do so. That was not the point. You then surrounded yourself with unimaginable luxuries which you would have never achieved in reality. I understand how that might be pleasant, but that was not the point.
You could have done so well...
You found yourself in a realm of darkness. It scared you beyond your tiny, pathetic understanding. Yet, for some reason, you channelled your entire being into making yourself feel comfortable in a void filled with the unknown. You submerged yourself in superficial delight, peacefully embracing your existence. It did not even occur in that miserable, human brain of yours to leave.
Why didn’t you just leave?
You proved me right – humans do not understand the world. You answered my question – possible equals comfortable. I had faith in you. You disappointed me.
I’m getting rid of you.
