I’ve posted on here before about how I feel like Luther from Umbrella Academy seems like a literal, walking, talking portrayal of what body dysmorphia feels like. Not just how extreme his physique is or his own shame and self-loathing, but also the way the camera kind of warps around him to emphasize how much space he’s taking up, the sound effects of floor boards straining under his feet, the way the camera angles always make him seem like he’s looming over everything, all of the furniture pieces or vehicles that seem incredibly small and flimsy under him.
It just all adds up to a constant feeling of awareness of his body, the space it takes up, and how people perceive him in an uncomfortable, almost paranoid-seeming way that just really made me sympathize with him (even in season 1, when a lot of people hated him). For much of the show, he feels trapped in and limited by his body, and even when he’s fantasizing about a romantic dance sequence, he can only imagine it with an idealized version of himself in a different body.
When I posted about this, several trans followers said that it also reminded them not only of dysmorphia but gender dysphoria. With that in mind, seeing his relationship with Viktor in Season 3 hit differently. Although he was awkward about it, he seemed the most genuinely thrilled for Viktor and it was really sweet seeing him ask him to be his Best Man, especially after their extremely turbulent past. I kind of feel like Luther might have a different perspective on what Viktor’s been through than the other siblings because he’s also felt like he wasn’t at home in his body, just not in the same way. Viktor was able to make changes in his appearance and identity to be perceived the way he felt inside, and I could tell Luther was really proud of him.
Likewise, it was nice to see Luther finally accept himself for who he is now (even before That Ending)— I feel like he was only able to let go of some of his body hang-ups because being transported to a timeline where he never existed means there are no preconceived ideas of who he is or what he’s supposed to live up to, so people who meet him for the first time just see him as himself.
And it’s so poetic that Sloane has gravity powers, because Luther has felt so physically heavy for the first several seasons and the right person makes him feel light- not like his body is different, but like it’s not weighing him down or trapping him. It’s nice to watch him dancing without being an idealized version of himself. It’s nice to see him wearing better fitting clothes instead of hiding behind baggy outfits and oversized coats. When he gets the idealized body he thought he wanted at the end of the series, he’s thrilled at first— but what he really wants is to show Sloane, and when he can’t find her, none of that matters anymore.
But my favorite moment in the whole series was watching Luther and Viktor with their arms around each other dancing and singing horribly to “Time of My Life” at the Bachelor party. They just both looked so happy and un-self-conscious and that’s just exactly what I wanted from both of them.
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