Kein Mehrheit Für Die Mitleid

Political circlejerk hateblog here to fuck hard bisexually

[kmftm]

He/him

Transgender man

Transandrobro - pro-endo - anti-censorship - youthlib supporter - anti-MAGAt - antifascist - sex worker and transgender inclusive feminist

18+ guy, blog is sfw, minors do whatever idc. MAPS and pro/neu/complex-contact harmful paraphiles will be reported and laughed at behind their backs.

nazis will be reported. TERFS will be reported. Transmisogynists will be reported. This is not a safe space for your disgusting idealogical tar pits.

I exist to discourse, hateblog and steal a cool username

[kmftm]

like yes being treated as a certain gender as according to your assigned sex at birth does change the way you interact with the world and how the world interacts with you but we have got to call it anything other than gendered socialisation because that’s just full frontal TERF shit at this point

[auti-starshine]

The fearmongering around medical transition for transmascs will never not be upsetting to me.

“you’re gonna look ugly as a man” “but you’re such a pretty girl, don’t change that” Wrong. You will look different after T, but you will look happy. You will probably grow hair and gain weight and look pretty different, and none of that is bad or makes you less desirable. You are going to look like you and that’s all that matters.

“T makes you angry” “you’re gonna be a scary man i won’t feel safe around you” Wrong. Testosterone does not “make” you angry. Messing with your hormones will mess with your emotions for sure, but you will not immediately become some scary predator when you start T. Being a man/masculine does not make you a threat, a predator, or inherently angry. That’s radfem shit.

“bottom growth is gross” “no one will want you with bottom growth” Wrong. Bottom growth is cool and a LOT of guys end up loving theirs a lot more than they thought they would. For a lot of people it is a desirable trait, there are people who find bottom growth hot and attractive. And! If you’re sure you don’t want it there’s things you can do to work around that, just talk to your provider.

“bottom surgery is super painful and not worth it” First off, call it phalloplasty, because that’s what you’re talking about. Second, yes it’s painful, it’s surgery. There are risks to it and complications can happen, but that’s true of any surgery. Phallo might not be for you, but it is life saving care for other folks. It is beautiful and should be talked about as life saving care and not as some afterthought thing that no one actually does.

Being transmasculine is a beautiful thing. Transitioning medically is not something every trans person wants, but if you notice yourself holding back for the reasons i’ve listed above (or similar) maybe reconsider.

[transautismman]

Cant use transandrophobia because androphobia isnt real

Cant use transmisandry because misandry isnt real

Cant use isomisogyny bc we don't experience misogyny in a unique way

Cant use transandromisia or anti-transmasculinity because masculinity isnt punished

Cant use

[riv3rboychaos]

"isaac ransom is a poor widdle victim of the system" he is allowed to play on a woman's team while any trans woman is banned and you lot would lose your fucking minds if a trans woman detransitioned to compete in men's sports. unreal levels of doublethink from you transandrochuds. stop grifting and actually listen to women instead of dismissing everything we say.

"you lot would lose your fucking minds if a trans woman detransitioned to compete in men's sports" actually no, i cant talk for anyone else, but for me personally i would have exactly the same reaction as i have to isaac ranson: i would feel upset that she had to do that to continue playing and i would be pissed off if anyone spewed some of the shit theyre spewing about isaac ranson

[asterosian]

“I wish I was hyperinvisible” no, actually, you do not wish that you were on the receiving end of the same amount of violence but also having everyone insist that it isn’t happening and trying their damndest to pretend you don’t exist even if it means you end up dying even more frequently while the statistics recording it mislabel you entirely

I am not saying hypervisibility is better. I have to clarify this before you all start pissing on the poor. I don’t think either case is desirable. I think what we all really want is to be acknowledged enough to have the records showing what happens to us be recorded accurately and to have the help we need while also not being constantly in the spotlight just to be demonized and scrutinized. My point is don’t act like trans men and nonbinary people are lucky to be erased.

[tboy-cock]

hate the idea that women cant enact misogyny on trans men, have you met the mother of a trans man?

[kmftm]

this should apply to everything you read on tumblr, I’m simply using transandrophobia to highlight this issue.

I have no problem with people sharing their experiences on tumblr. I have no problem with those experiences being used to point to an issue and call for change. I have a problem with those issues and experiences being used to justify the continued erasure of and violence against transmascs and trans men.

Often I see transandrophobic rhetoric backed up by a story of an experience regarding a transmasc, trans man or “tme” person shared by someone who then goes on to advocate against our struggles and issues, often within the same post.

I’m going to, in the best faith possible, assume these stories and the experiences behind them are completely real and accurate, with nothing misrepresented or misinterpreted. However, the basic literary devices and persuasive features used to convey these stories are not used in good faith. I do not often see these experiences shared in good faith.

for a quick refresher for those a little out of practice with persuasive writing at an Australian middle school English level:

Ethos is a feature that lets the argument be backed up by credentials and the legitimacy of a trusted source, like citing statistics from a government website or quoting a famous theoretical author.

Pathos is a usage of emotive language meant to spark empathy, like describing in detail the turbulent feelings behind a moment of discrimination or oppression.

Logos is the employment of logic and critical thinking to persuade a reader, and in isolation from the other two, can sound incredibly cold and harsh.

a call to action builds upon the persuasive rhetoric previously espoused to convince the readers to take a course of action, support a cause, or be more aware of an issue. It’s literally what it says on the tin, a call to action.

these experiences can be expressed and acknowledged without needing a call to action against transmascs and trans men. We are not the issue here. If a transfem or trans woman is being excluded, harassed or bullied out of a space, it’s an easy bet that other marginalised and often demonised identities are as well, but I don’t see this sort of post talking about them or calling for unity against their common struggle.

yes, things need to change. Transfems and trans women need to stop being pushed out of queer spaces and ostracised by their own community. However, this is a community-wide issue that deserves attention, not the fault of a seperate identity that gets pushed out of different spaces in different ways.

and look, I’ll be the first to admit most of the experience-sharing sort of posts I see in the community against transandrophobia fall into the same sort of thing. There’ll be a story told of a transandrophobic experience with plenty of emotive language appealing to pathos, there’ll be a quote of a statistic or a feminist book that backs up the eventual call to action, there’ll be an appeal to cold hard logic and facts. And at the end there’s a call to action against transandrophobia.

I’m not saying we stop talking about our experiences and the ways they impact our lives and communities. I’m saying we need to be more aware of the way those experiences are conveyed and expressed, and what arguments they help back up and justify. This goes across the whole of tumblr.

[testosterone-tuesday]

It is incredibly strange to see that some trans people's response to the distorted ideas of gender socialization that TERFs sling around is to basically deny their conclusions... but validate the premise?

"Trans people do not have the same experiences of internalizing gendered teachings as cis people, because even before we come out our transness influences us"

Yea!! 👍 woohoo

"...by which I mean even before we came out we were always innately boys/girls and therefore naturally were only internalizing the ideas about our Correct gender about ourselves. So actuallyyyy ☝️we are not (agab) socialized we are (gender identity) socialized."

???????????????????

Okay so like

A. This is engaging with the knock-off TERF version of socialization way too much. It's actually, really, super not how this works. You're ascribing too much legitimacy to an approach to gender and socialization that is genuinely incoherent, because it's bio-essentialism pantomiming faux-sociology. It's just more essentialist boy-brain/girl-brain shit. Which brings me to:

B. You are participating in some essentialist boy-brain/girl-brain shit rn. But doing it where you have the Right Brain. This is not the validation you think it is.

We are going from "trans people have nuanced experiences navigating gendered teachings" and into some mystical "I only subconsciously absorbed messages directed at my latent identity in a completely exclusive, binary way, because of some innate, pure gendered impulse which had complete and proper discernment onto knowing which messaging and experiences society treated me with were for me or The Other. So anything directed towards me because of my agab was water-off-a-ducks-back, I did not take it personally, and it had no lasting effect, therefore did not impact my gender-psyche. Because my True Gender warded it off.

Because of that I was actually socialized Correctly, with all the Correct implications on how that effects my behaviors and thoughts, because men and women integrally are/think/act differently and I'm like that but the correct one ✨✨✨ yay ✨✨"

C. ...nonbinary people who????? Whats that

It's like. This is coming off like you are terrified of being invalidated right now but this is not a validating rebuttal. Or realistic. It's not even this black and white for cis people? There are so many issues here.

I guess I'll put it like this.

If there is a trans person who grew up as their agab, lived as cis for decades, totally gender conforming, completely internalized what society said they were supposed to be like according to their agab, were taught specific behaviors and ideas because of their agab, and took those on as a part of their self perception, like really did live thinking they were a girl/boy for a long time- then one day began to question their gender and only then realized they weren't their agab? They're still trans, and still valid in their identity.

Like, there still would be nuance to their historical relationship with gender, it wouldn't be without trans influence long before knowing they're trans, but they could totally have internalized any degree of agab targeted teachings from the start and had that influence their perceptions of themself and the world, and that fact is not invalidating their identity or dooming it.

In fact, that's not unusual at all? It's normal for stuff like that to have some kind of impact on us. The obvious fact being ignored here is that at any point we can call these ideas, behaviors, and teachings from past experiences into question, and reevaluate our relationship to them- and you know what? Cis people do this all the time too. Their ideas of what their gender means to them changes, they experience new dimensions to it, they reject old ones. It's all complicated and affects us in personal, ever evolving ways. Socialization is an ongoing, lifelong process. One thing of many that TERFs ignore.

Being influenced in some way from living or being raised as our agab is nuanced for trans people but it is real, and completely denying any impact from it comes off more like dysphoric insecurity than anything else to me.

Which I don't want to be totally unsympathetic to, it is a fear born in reaction to transphobic attitudes like that of TERFs, and a world which treats out agab experiences as tainting us and invalidating us.

I also feel this kind of thinking is an extreme response to what is really needing to be communicated- that you experienced things differently than cis people of your agab, that it isn't a simple binary "male" or "female" socialization you lived. There really is no one universal "male" or "female" socialization, especially for trans people, and trying to fit us into one and is not ever going to be truly reflective of our variable circumstances. I think that's extremely important to acknowledge.

But saying you purely and exclusively experienced the secondhand socialization of your gender identity is not communicating that reality, neither is it saving you from invalidation. It's building a mythology for yourself still set upon that same strict gender binary, which was made to exclude us.

The thing is, having a mixed gendered experience is literally okay, that's extremely normal trans shit, and TERFs are just plainly wrong about what they think those experiences imply.

Because gendered socialization isn't some bullshit where how we grew up makes us have permanent, terminal boy-brain/girl-brains, that our minds just calcify into for eternity. Acting as Proof to why The Two Genders are fundamentally and distinctly Different, as we are irrevocably Separate and rigidly assigned forever and ever...

Because... I mean come on. That's just kinda dumb.

[kmftm]

kink is not praxis. It’s a way for the human psyche to interact with its traumas and anxieties.

I’m not into kinkshaming and bringing up people’s fetishes in criticism of them.

if the fetish or kink in question is just a thinly veiled excuse to nonconsensually harm others or otherwise act out harmful paraphilias on the actual subject of those paraphilias, it is not a point in discourse, it is material harm that must be called attention to and dealt with.

kink is not praxis. Miss me with that shit.

[papercranesandpride]

I remember years ago, long enough ago that I was still using either Tiktok or Instagram regularly, because that's where I saw this, long enough ago that unfortunately I do not remember the username, I saw an older trans woman responding to a comment asking "how come we see trans women from your generation, but never trans men?" And her response was simple. "Unfortunately, it's because most of them are dead." Between lack of safe and legal abortions (which, hey, look what's an issue again), the HIV/AIDs crisis (which still is lacking in approved treatments for trans men, and they're still likely to be denied PrEP/PEP even when they should be eligible as sexually active queer men), and how many of them chose to take their own lives after being forced into marriages and other women's roles, a lot of the trans men that should be elderly right now did not make it.

And now, when I find myself making the mistake of going on Instagram, I get to see trans men themselves talking about how historically, trans men didn't do anything for the community, and so we need to step up now. Which, first of all, that isn't true, but second of all, if trans men's contributions are lesser, that makes a lot of sense if we listen to that trans woman talking about the trans men she was in community with back in the day. It's very hard to advance the trans cause if you're not alive.

Anyway. It's a really chilling answer. "Where are all the elderly trans men?" "They're dead." And I just wish more people saw that tiktok and listened to it and really took it to heart, now that we're in the age of "well obviously trans men have it so much easier."

[one-hell-of-a-showtime]

I freaking hate seeing queer creators that I enjoy and look up to (especially TRANSMASC/TRANS MEN creators!!) be so awful about trans men and mascs trying to talk about how we’re oppressed. Like it’s most definitely not “only trans women” who are being attacked right now.

T has /been/ a controlled substance. “ROGD” was aimed at “mutilated girls”. Do none of you remember the Irreversible Damage book. That Joanne Rowling specifically got mad at gender-neutral language regarding menstruation and periods and said that people transition because of “the allure of escaping womanhood”.

Do all of you think erasure = safety? And that we only are “accidentally” and “less importantly” hurt?

We are all shot at by the same gun, but you still turn the knife on the rest of your kin.

[bro-ur-literally-chips]

- i see a good post about how non-passing trans women are treated by people and society at large

- i like it and check the reblogs

- op has reblogged it and randomly dragged transmascs and trans men into this and the first sentence includes "trans men aren't feared"

- the rest of the reblog contains TMA/TME language and talks about how transmascs and trans men are actually celebrated by... everyone??

- i unlike the post and block op. This is like the 5th time this has happened this week

[kmftm]

“tma applies to cis men” so when do we start getting discourse about whether or not tma is a form of degendering

[this-is-anti-masculinity]

This is transandrophobia.

Ough, yeah, if you actually read up on the history of the term [link], it has never been specific to trans women. In fact, its origins are completely unknown - trans & gender diverse people of all kinds have been using it for years.

It's always been about "coming out of your shell", about growing into what you're meant to be, hatching out of the embryo stage.

The "chick" definition was just a fun add on that trans women were using within their own circles, and instead of remaining silly wordplay, it got twisted by transandrophobes and exorsexists into...whatever this nonsense is.

(Additionally, the "trans men killed the women they used to be" thing is such a massive red flag, considering TERFs use that as an anti-trans talking point all the time. Also, many trans men still align with womanhood in some way, so it's just...such a huge generalization of the trans man experience.)

[malwareproductions]

hey wait a munute. the transtrender thing really soecifically targeted trans men and transmascs. hey thats weird i just realized thst

edit: someone in the replies phrased it the exact way i wanted to

this is EXACTLY what i wanted to say but i couldnt figure out how to say it properly. it was absolutely about nonbinary/gnc people at a core level and i’m sorry i missed that

[kmftm]

“Transemasculation” wait we’re being afforded masculinity and dignity within that masculine identity instead of just being seen and acted upon as malfunctioning ugly brainwashed girls???? Big news in the world of Totally Being Seen As A Man By Society.

even this assumption of socially recognised masculinity in transmasculinity is only in reference to any notion of that masculinity being ripped away from us.