THIS MOMENT WAS ONE OF THE BEST IN THE EPISODE.
Because not allowing feelings to cloud a Jedi’s judgement is one of the key things that George Lucas has always said the Jedi are about, this isn’t a moment of Obi-Wan being in the wrong, this is him being right, he’s recognizing his own biases here, that he can’t just go off half-cocked based on an emotional reaction, no matter how sympathetic or understandable that reaction is, because people will die.
This connects with Obi-Wan’s entire past with Maul, that Maul killed Qui-Gon and he killed Satine, all because he set a trap for Obi-Wan, who didn’t go to Mandalore with as clear a focus as he could have and she died because of him, because Maul wanted to hurt Obi-Wan. And he fears another trap being set by Maul–and he’s right, it is a trap.
It also connects with a scene from earlier in this arc, where Obi-Wan is shown to know that Anakin was talking to Padme, and Dave Filoni (writer of this episode, “Old Friends Not Forgotten”) says about the parallels between Obi-Wan/Satine and Anakin/Padme:
“Obi-Wan’s not dumb. He knows Anakin’s in love with this woman. I don’t think he ever understands that they got married. I don’t think he thinks Anakin took it that far. I mean, even Obi-Wan was in love with someone. That’s not abnormal. It’s very normal. What you choose to do and how you choose to have a relationship, what you sacrifice, then that becomes a bigger deal when he’s made an oath to the Jedi Order to be selfless, to put everyone else ahead of himself. And he never thinks that two of them would do something so drastic. But it dawns on him over time that they have.” –Dave Filoni
The contrast between them, the reason Obi-Wan/Satine is a foil for Anakin/Padme is that question of the oath for selflessness they each made vs the personal feelings they have. The feelings themselves are fine, that’s why Obi-Wan specifically says to Anakin (in the Rush Clovis arc) that it’s not like Jedi aren’t allowed to have these feelings, they’re normal.
But it’s about what you do with them and which path you choose to take. Obi-Wan and Satine both chose their oaths and sworn duties (and they both found fulfilment in those lives!), that both are valid choices and paths for a person to take! But trying to hoard both of them splits you in two, it’s like being married to your Order and married to your spouse, that you’ve vowed to put them both first in your life, and eventually that’s going to snap you in two because you can’t truly be committed to either.
Which is precisely what Anakin does in Revenge of the Sith where he refuses to choose between these two life commitments, these two separate marriages he basically has. That he cannot be the selfless person he’s vowed to be, when he treats his relationship with Padme so selfishly.
And it’s also a perfect illustration of why Anakin doesn’t tell Obi-Wan about his marriage, even though he has to know that Obi-Wan is at least aware of something between them–because Anakin knows the answer he’s going to get, he’s always known the answer. Because Obi-Wan did choose, because Obi-Wan did choose the selfless path and actually gave up something he may have wanted, but would have constantly torn him away from the path he also wanted to be on. He says, “Had you said the word, I would have left the Jedi Order.” and Anakin likely overheard that, which means he knows Obi-Wan loved her enough for that, but still recognized there was a choice that had to be made.
Anakin sees that Obi-Wan chose, that he loved Satine, that he still loves her even now, that it’s never been that Anakin was told love was wrong, but that he couldn’t consume himself with both and he knew he’d have to choose and he didn’t want to. Not until his fears ate him and his selfishness for Padme’s presence in his life, his inability to live without her, uncaring of what she would have wanted him to do in her name or how this would make her feel about him, to see her husband doing these horrifying things, forced him to choose and even then I would argue that his turning on the Jedi isn’t that he truly didn’t want to be one, but that he couldn’t justify what he’d done unless he said the Jedi were evil. Because, if the Jedi weren’t evil, then Anakin murdering their children was evil, and Anakin couldn’t be evil, it had to be something else.
This scene is an illustration of how Obi-Wan Kenobi is a true Jedi (something Dave Filoni has said about the character before in the commentary for “The Lawless”) in that he loved Satine but he was able to let her go. She still means something to him, he still loves her, but he’s able to step back and be clear-headed about it, is able to find purpose and meaning in his life without her–and Anakin has never wanted to do that.
Watching Obi-Wan be balanced and selfless about Satine drives a wedge of fear into Anakin’s heart, he doubles down on swearing to never go to Obi-Wan about this, because he knows the advice he’ll get and it’s not going to be, “Here’s the magic answer to being able to stop all death.” It’s going to be, “You have to make a choice, otherwise you’re going to tear yourself and your relationships apart.” Which he really, really does not want to hear.
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