Tiny Amateur Psychologist

At only 18 years old Tiny Kong already owns a successful Piroshki restaurant in New Donk City, and is currently working her way through college to become a Psychologist. Confirmed Anon Service Available (click for details). This blog is intended for mostly NSFW RP, if you or your muse are minors, please turn around. 18+ONLY!

[kongnextdoor]

“Oh… okay then. I mean, if living forever isn’t one of the perks of dating a god, it’s probably best to find out early. So, you’re not going to dump me when I’m a 40-year-old hag and my coconuts are hanging below my belt are you?”

[the-i-d-f-l-hq]

“Cleopatra is your full first name dear, and since you offered…”

*He picks her up in his arms as he carries her out to his ‘personal chambers’.

[kongnextdoor]

//Just for reference, when a girl puts up double ‘V for Victory’ signs, it’s generally the universal gesture for ‘I’m gettin’ dick tonight!’ or at least that’s how it was at my school. It seems like it was only a very local thing, because I can’t find the connection mentioned anywhere online. Anyway, this is my ‘Tiny’s getting dicked’ icon, which unfortunately for you means another fade to black. One day I’ll find a bolder RP partner, but apparently that time has not yet come.

[kongnextdoor]

Love me you Hoe!!

“I never want to give details, no matter how vague, because everyone’s an internet sleuth these days, but I have been busy. Is this how you ask politely?”

[naughtyandnicerpmemes]

The receiving muse is asleep. Have the sending muse wake them up by giving them oral.

Send 🍆 to wake them up by sucking them off

Remember to specify muse for multi-muse blogs!

[kongnextdoor]

Alternatively, send 🌮 to wake them up by eating them out

[shencomix]

[quyman33]

Why would you admit this so publicly

[kongnextdoor]

//Probably to get the ball rolling, so to speak. He was literally just a placeholder until they came up with an interesting hero and then they never got around to it, and just released the original game ‘as is.’ He’s a terribly uninteresting blob of nothing, and everything you think is interesting is just your own headcanon. He survives by being so bland that there’s nothing he does to contradict such a wide variety of headcanons, that hundreds of tweens can claim, supposedly ‘unironically,’ that their interpretation is the ‘true’ interpretation.

It’s actually amazing how little work they put into Kirby, himself, considering how much lore they put into every other character in his franchise. The average Waddle Dee had more lore than Kirby, to say nothing about everyone’s favorite, ‘Bandana Dee.’

[kongnextdoor]

A Jade Tongue

[kongnextdoor]

“Now we’ve come full circle, where I’m the mature one. As much as I’d love to help you with your… uh… little problem, my cooter’s all full of spooge right now. I don’t know if you’d be into that, plus I don’t want to break the patient confidentiality thing by having you guess who topped me off.

But let’s get back to why you haven’t played with yourself in months. Do you not have your own room? Is there no lock on your door? On an arbitrarily unrelated note, have you and Delta ever had sex? And can you tell me how promiscuous he is? For completely unrelated, reasons to the subject at hand.”

[gofirestarthefighteroffriendsh]

“I was talking about my Female boss that I want to Fuck me, so that ship has sailed, I do have my own room but Delta can read my brain waves so he knows I’m (In his words):Pounding the tuna, so I don’t do that.”

“Also… He’s a workaholic. But he will give you bling if you need it.” She said as she stop and think about what she said…

[kongnextdoor]

“I was just… if you’ll ‘pound the tuna’ in front of me, a stranger you’ve just met… you don’t seem like the type to be embarrassed by someone reading your mind. But, I don’t have to understand it. Delta can tell when you’re horny by reading your brain waves, and you want to move out so you can get some privacy. Correct?”

[gofirestarthefighteroffriendsh]

“Every time I try… He knows…” She said as she stopped, and now seeing she wet the couch with her juices.

“Oops… I pay you. I promise.” She said as she look at”

[kongnextdoor]

“Yes... well... I’m apparently going to have to look into getting this place scrubbed. Maybe I should call a porn studio? They’re bound to know how to clean up... er, this kind of stuff, right?”

[discosue]

@kongnextdoor

“Guess who’s coming to Mario Kart Tour? It’s your sister! Only, replace coming with she apparently arrived on May 20, 2020… I just don’t log into the game often enough. So… IDK… that’s a good sign. Maybe one day they’ll add you into the game, or even *gasp* me. Probably after they add three goombas in a trench coat.

That’s not even hyperbole… Dr. Goomba Tower is a real thing.”

[kongnextdoor]

“Aw man, Kalypso, can you imagine Nintendo putting us in a racing game together? It would be totally amazeballs!”

[kongnextdoor]

A Jade Tongue

[kongnextdoor]

“Now we’ve come full circle, where I’m the mature one. As much as I’d love to help you with your… uh… little problem, my cooter’s all full of spooge right now. I don’t know if you’d be into that, plus I don’t want to break the patient confidentiality thing by having you guess who topped me off.

But let’s get back to why you haven’t played with yourself in months. Do you not have your own room? Is there no lock on your door? On an arbitrarily unrelated note, have you and Delta ever had sex? And can you tell me how promiscuous he is? For completely unrelated, reasons to the subject at hand.”

[gofirestarthefighteroffriendsh]

“I was talking about my Female boss that I want to Fuck me, so that ship has sailed, I do have my own room but Delta can read my brain waves so he knows I’m (In his words):Pounding the tuna, so I don’t do that.”

“Also… He’s a workaholic. But he will give you bling if you need it.” She said as she stop and think about what she said…

[kongnextdoor]

“I was just... if you’ll ‘pound the tuna’ in front of me, a stranger you’ve just met... you don’t seem like the type to be embarrassed by someone reading your mind. But, I don’t have to understand it. Delta can tell when you’re horny by reading your brain waves, and you want to move out so you can get some privacy. Correct?”

[kongnextdoor]

A Jade Tongue

[kongnextdoor]

“Now we’ve come full circle, where I’m the mature one. As much as I’d love to help you with your... uh... little problem, my cooter’s all full of spooge right now. I don’t know if you’d be into that, plus I don’t want to break the patient confidentiality thing by having you guess who topped me off.

But let’s get back to why you haven’t played with yourself in months. Do you not have your own room? Is there no lock on your door? On an arbitrarily unrelated note, have you and Delta ever had sex? And can you tell me how promiscuous he is? For completely unrelated, reasons to the subject at hand.”

[shencomix]

[woahhhhtekifinallygonemad]

How dare you point me out~

[succdocs]

*Sad horny noises*

[kongnextdoor]

A Jade Tongue

[kongnextdoor]

“It’s okay, whatever happens in this room will be kept strictly confidential. I won’t tell anyone about your ‘wandering tail’.” she smiled and patted Jade on the back.

[gofirestarthefighteroffriendsh]

She looks at her and put hands into her pants…

[kongnextdoor]

“Just out of curiosity… were you this, ah… ‘subtle’ with Bella Gold? Flagrantly making your intentions known at every possible step?”

//Also, just checking, by saying ‘her’ did you mean to shove your hands into your own pants, or into mine?

[gofirestarthefighteroffriendsh]

“No… I thought if I told her she would…” She said as she moarn in pleasure.

(Also she was in her own pants)

[kongnextdoor]

“I think you missed out on my ‘air quotes,’ if you told her... well, that’s about as straightforward as it gets. And did she ever answer you? Did she give you a hard no, or did she string you along? Did she have a boyfriend-slash-girlfriend?”

[cop-disliker69]

Horny freaks > literally anyone who is complaining about “horny freaks.”

[kongnextdoor]

A Jade Tongue

[kongnextdoor]

“It’s okay, whatever happens in this room will be kept strictly confidential. I won’t tell anyone about your ‘wandering tail’.” she smiled and patted Jade on the back.

[gofirestarthefighteroffriendsh]

She looks at her and put hands into her pants…

[kongnextdoor]

“Just out of curiosity... were you this, ah... ‘subtle’ with Bella Gold? Flagrantly making your intentions known at every possible step?”

//Also, just checking, by saying ‘her’ did you mean to shove your hands into your own pants, or into mine?

[kongnextdoor]

A Jade Tongue

[kongnextdoor]

“It’s okay, whatever happens in this room will be kept strictly confidential. I won’t tell anyone about your ‘wandering tail’.” she smiled and patted Jade on the back.

[neko-shadow-archived]

kongnextdoor‌:

“I sure wish I had a Marry Poppins Mjölnir TARDIS magic satchel… of course, I’d probably just hoard bananas in it or something.”

“Heh, maybe it’s for the best that you don’t have one then. Imagine if you left a banana in some dark corner and forgot about it, imagine how much it’d smell and how much effort it’d take to clean up the mould.” Shadow gave a light chuckle as he slid the spear back into his bag.

[kongnextdoor]

“Do bananas go rotten these days? It’s never come up before... does that mean Donkey Kong is replacing his horde weekly or something? Like he’s got a system or something; like first in, first out, where he just literally eats through that many bananas that quickly, so no particular one is ever more than a few days old? That’s actually quite impressive, I’ve known him for years, and that’s the only thing he’s done that’s implied he has a modicum of intelligence.”

[kongnextdoor]

A Jade Tongue

[kongnextdoor]

“Ah, so it’s guilt. Well, cry it out, a good cry is often surprisingly therapeutic. Um… do you want a hug?”

[gofirestarthefighteroffriendsh]

She Hugged her as she cry. Her tail rubbing her leg…

[kongnextdoor]

She hugged back and commented on the little guy rubbing her leg, “Is that your tail, or are you just happy to... it is your tail.”

[kongnextdoor]

What Does Feminist Porn Look Like?

A lot of pornography is proudly misogynistic, but it doesn't have to be like that. There's no reason a video can't be sexually explicit and still present women as human beings who have an equal right to sexual desire, pleasure, and satisfaction. There's no reason that porn can't present women as sexual collaborators with men rather than as sexual conquests of men.

Obviously, the male and female performers, or their characters, should be treated as equals.

Second, male-female sex should not be presented as something penises do to vaginas (or other orifices).

Third, sex is something that people do, at least most of the time, in the context of a larger relationship.

Fourth, kissing, touching, and caressing are important, because that is what real lovemaking is like.

Finally, sex isn’t something a couple does for other people, but something they do for themselves. So their sexual interaction should be presented as one they enjoy.

//Patient #436814 has introduced me to feminist porn, it’s what I’ve been searching for basically all my life! I mean, ever since midnight on my eighteenth birthday, naturally.

Prudish Gatekeepers Do Not Interact.

[kongnextdoor]

//Damn Shadow, always ‘hiding’ in the notes, where I can’t respond without revealing my main account, or screenshotting it like this. Whether or not you’re a feminist, surely you’ve noticed that ‘regular’ porn is roughly 90% rape? ‘Oh, but it’s not rape, you see, she offered her body because she really didn’t have the money to buy that pizza!’ Well, I have never actually seen that plot. I think someone made up a cheesy but consensual plot to spread around as the ‘poster child’ (for lack of a better word) for pornography, to hide its horrible true nature.

But IDK, this isn’t a PornHub place, it’s a place where they want me to buy videos... I’ve never paid for porn in my life! Of course that was because the porn industry is largely a misogynist hellscape... technically I should be supporting female creators. But this comes at the exact wrong time, money is really tight right now because of the virus thing. And unlike some people, I’m not paid by the government to sit on my ass and harass people on the internet for imagined infractions.

... but I digress...

[kongnextdoor]

What Does Feminist Porn Look Like?

A lot of pornography is proudly misogynistic, but it doesn't have to be like that. There's no reason a video can't be sexually explicit and still present women as human beings who have an equal right to sexual desire, pleasure, and satisfaction. There's no reason that porn can't present women as sexual collaborators with men rather than as sexual conquests of men.

Obviously, the male and female performers, or their characters, should be treated as equals.

Second, male-female sex should not be presented as something penises do to vaginas (or other orifices).

Third, sex is something that people do, at least most of the time, in the context of a larger relationship.

Fourth, kissing, touching, and caressing are important, because that is what real lovemaking is like.

Finally, sex isn’t something a couple does for other people, but something they do for themselves. So their sexual interaction should be presented as one they enjoy.

//Patient #436814 has introduced me to feminist porn, it’s what I’ve been searching for basically all my life! I mean, ever since midnight on my eighteenth birthday, naturally.

Prudish Gatekeepers Do Not Interact.