i'm embarrassing

I apologize

[restless-nightmares]

[lisamarie-vee]

[icarianarts]

Inventing new dishes

[cornedbeefhashtags]

Diane, clear my schedule. I’m attempting a recipe that says “prep time: 15 minutes.”

[epsee]

life of adventure

[milk5]

Each pea makes us closer to getting bigger

[milk5]

Eventually we get larger from eating them

[unpretty]

there was a chicken loose on the golf course so they just. brought it in. to the office.

[unpretty]

you can't argue with her work ethic

[dogsuffrage]

[dickmaster]

Cunty little thing isnt it

[heathcliffgirl1847]

KING SALMON SWEATER DONE I WILL EAT CELEBRATORY SALMON IN IT FOR DINNER #SALMONLIFE

modifications:

folded collar

seperated sleeves immediately after colourwork

dk yarn

a little cropped

[dicksmasher]

HAPPY PRIDE, F-WORDS

[marinella-ela]

[leafstem]

lets lay down with baby

lets lay down with mama

lets lay down with mama

lets lay down with mama

[doctoralhashimi]

(insp.)

[nealashitposts]

So I've got this friend whose nervous because she's trans and dating this guy who she hasn't told yet because they've only been on a two dates. For this story let's call the friend Jane and the guy she was dating Jason. Happy ending don't worry.

So I tell Jane to bring her boy over to a bbq I'm having and she can tell him she's trans at my place surrounded by queer and trans people who love her and will support her if he ends up being awful.

She waits till the end of the bbq to tell him the news, by which point the rest of us have learned that Jason is a kind, friendly, empathetic, hard working, dummy. So we sit down, all of us a little worried about this gym bro's reaction when she tells him she's trans, and that she understands if he doesn't want to keep dating her it's no big deal.

He's baffled, so we explain what trans is, and after the disclosure that she hasn't had bottom surgery yet...

"Oh you have a dick?"

"... yeah."

He look's around at the room full of people with baited breath, his clearly a little afraid girl friend says

"Oooohhhh! I get it! You think- don't worry Babe! Watch this!"

And ya'll this man jumps up, runs into the kitchen and returns with one of the bratwurst we had for grilling and proceeds to tilt his head back, put it down his throat, hold it in his mouth for a moment, and spit it up without even a whisper of a gag and then looks around at the group absolutely beaming with pride.

My mans saw his worried girlfriend and her support network and thought to him self "Oh they don't think I can't please my girl, but I'll show them!"

[nealashitposts]

I do feel the need to add that later he excitedly tell the group that as a straight guy, he never thought that skill would be useful outside hotdog eating contests.

[hyperrbolic-orange]

"Man its too bad that im straight since I've got like no gag reflex and all."

"Honey, I must tell you, i am in fact trans and I have not had bottom surgery."

"My god... everything's coming up Jason."

[dancinbutterfly]

Pure of heart dumb of ass hetero of sexual

[sammiesweetheart]

[paxamericana]

“euuuh i’m james from twin peaks and i’m sad because my bike won’t fuck me and i’m here to make the next five minutes feel like an hour”

[theborzoiarebackintown]

He can sense my judgement of his weird paws

[dillyt]

my cat: *walks in my room*

me: oh!!!! hello stinky!!!!! come over here smelly!!! psspssspsspsspsst nchnchnchnch come on! please???

my cat: