Jack

Instagram = pseudonym.jack

[kyle-jack543]

Delirium

As I sit with heavy eyes

I have many questions,

Most of them tend to be why’s

Should I seek suggestions?

Can’t pinpoint the driving force

That brought this conclusion,

No point beating a dead horse.

Peer through the illusion

Stuck in deep cogitation.

Is this the easy route?

Strenuous meditation,

With internal dispute.

It seems to me I remain

Outright oblivious

Do I tend to cause such pain?

Am I delirious?...

[kyle-jack543]

Fraternitati Fieri

As we march into the lion’s den.

There is no other I would want by my side.

Together we have the strength of a thousand men.

We march tall never boasting our pride.

You truly are like no other.

We may not be from the same womb.

To me you are my brother.

I will follow you to any room.

I hold you in high regard.

We share the same values.

Our bond will never be marred.

Through it all, you will be whom I choose.

You certainly are no nark.

We would lay down our lives for each other.

We are our own guides through the dark.

Don’t know where I would be without you brother.

[kyle-jack543]

Disappearing Act

They all say they won’t vanish.

In the end it will always perish.

I step in I say NO! Banishment.

What was done for such a harsh punishment?

Surely, an event will transpire.

One of which I can admire.

Trying hard holding onto the hope.

Difficult to change, so easy being a mope.

I wish I could believe.

Eventually someone won’t just leave.

Inadvertently knowing the truth.

Don’t I know it.  Oh strewth!

I hope that soon one will hang around.

In good company I wish to be abound.

[kyle-jack543]

Hemorrhage

I watched as the glow left your eyes

Were you to be the final prize?

‘Twas I who did the deed

Whilst you silently plead

One small movement of my finger

Now your breath ceases to linger

I may not be brilliant

I was raised resilient

The whole ordeal left not a scar

I drag you away from this carr

Not one revelation

I’m near on damnation

No remorse during ablation

I witness the jactitation

Dealing with no conscience

But, what’s the consequence?

[kyle-jack543]

Illumination

I push you away once again

You’re always wanting to help

I cannot stop this constant rain

I sit and silently yelp

I want nothing more than your aid

Please don’t leave at this hour

Should I ever say I’m afraid

Realise you have power

To me you mean a whole lot more

You may not realise yet

All I ask is, don’t slam the door

You truly are an asset

I sit here on the outskirt

Silently I will observe

Wondering why there is such hurt

What do we really deserve?

The peace you bring is uncanny

You push against the reaping

We fight against the tyranny

We keep sane slowly creeping

Through it all we must learn to bend

To us it’s just another day

We will work until it’s the end

Together we will run away

[kyle-jack543]

Carpool Confessions

He was unsure as to whether it was because of the trust between them or the fact that he had just borderline peer pressured her into showing him, but her music was absolutely amazing.  He was encapsulated in the voice of the most astonishingly unique songbird he had ever experienced.  She kept trying to find reasons to explain the songs “bad qualities” but he was utterly speechless.  She could not have been more wrong, there was absolutely no flaw to be found at all. He could not help but smile the entire time, the amazing music brought a smile to his face.  Her efforts to downplay and belittle her own music made him chuckle.  She did not realise the magnitude of her work, even if only a little demo, it was immensely moving, nigh on ground breaking.  The songbird asked for his honest opinion of the pieces.  What could he say apart from the truth and truthfully, it was mesmerising.  A man could get lost in the sea that is her voice and decimated by the waves that are her melodies.

[kyle-jack543]

Hidden

I understand the concept of happiness.

I am unsure as to the attainment.

I do not want to taint this “manliness.”

I am sure it brings much entertainment.

I still feel loneliness in a large crowd.

At this point, I do not seek nor do I ask for change.

I use my charisma as my shroud.

The mask flickers as I slowly derange.

Surely, an event of significance is inevitable.

Something so remarkably memorable.

But then I recall I am merely negligible.

[kyle-jack543]

Ascension

State of constant euphoria

Leading to mass hysteria

I’m not sure how to float

In the distance a boat

Trying to stay and swim

Loss from a sudden whim

I think I now am lost

I seek help, at what cost

I don’t mean to drag you under

I stay hidden whilst you plunder

To you it’s quite the score

I am left bruised and sore

I am not free in this mind

It really is quite the bind

Amongst all of this dismay

I truly cannot run away

So here I sit biding time

Waiting for the final chime

I will rise, I will conquer

Opposing any and all who sponsor

I won’t meet a swift embrace

But I will go without a trace

You will have to act fast

For this will be your last

[kyle-jack543]

Growth

I truly understand now how much I mean,

Over are the days wondering if someone is keen.

I am standing face to face in its dark lair,

Now I see it the hidden monster that is despair.

The lamentable feeling was quite daunting,

I struggle to move amidst this frightening haunting.

It’s about now I realise I’m dreaming,

It isn’t I but I now can feel someone scheming.

They are plotting, waiting for my swift demise,

But they failed to see it is now my time to rise.

I think I finally know my own self-worth,

It has been quite the trip to reach this point from my birth.

I have been through many a high and low point,

It is finally my time, they will come and anoint,

They will come to praise my well-honed self-restraint.

They will realise I am my own true patron saint.

My recovery surely won’t please many,

But of all the care I have, I cannot give any.

You could apologise for how you acted.

At a time like this, I am severely distracted.

I journey onward further from the abyss.

It is now I leave but not before a subtle kiss.

[kyle-jack543]

Butterfly

O’er the hills I do spy

The true sense of the word butterfly

Through all trials and tribulations she doth try

Her spirits never waiver nor she cry

She may still be within her cocoon

But someday soon she will fly

Nevertheless the entire time I do swoon

O’ lass of such beauty

I shall always fulfil my duty

To you I am indebted

As now I am unfretted

It is to you I must thank

For otherwise I’d have sank

[kyle-jack543]

Happiness is with you

It was the end to an astonishing night.  They stood in unison in front of the pub.  He dare not speak only take in the moment and enjoy her company as he had all night.  He stared into her eyes and shook her hand.  He was utterly lost in the vitreous amazonite that are her eyes.  He let reality slip as he thought of this girl. The only thing his mind allowed him to think of was the beautiful woman standing in front of him.  The hand shake ended snapping him out of his chimera.  Upon opening his eyes to reality he noticed she stood arms outreached as if calling for a hug, unsure as to whether it was a sign or not he waited a second and then decided to risk it and lean in for a hug. She didn’t back out.  It was an awkward embrace but an embrace none the less. He really appreciated it.  He really needed it.  It may have only been a farewell, but he hoped there was more to it than that.  It meant so much to him….

[kyle-jack543]

Hopefully something

He knew it was her almost immediately, he wasn’t sure how considering they hadn’t seen each other in years and the last time they had seen each other it was merely as another face in the sea that is the high school corridor.  He saw her approach, he stood up in anticipation.  Her pace changed.  She quickened her walk and even fit in a cute little skip.  He started walking towards her.  He saw the smile on her face, the joy in her eyes.  As they got closer all he could do was think of all the possible things he could say.  The moment of truth, she is right in front of him.  He decided to take the silent approach and simply wait for her to start the conversation.  They shook hands.  He is lost in the feel of her hand he almost misses his queue.

She starts with “Hey.”

He responds with “Hi.”

He finally decides to try and take in her features and he is in absolute awe.  Her hair is short; it barely falls past her chin, brunette with caramel-blonde highlights.  She has steel rimmed round glasses that frame her face so elegantly and only helps portray her features.  She has rather rounded features.  It is evident the hairstyle and style of glasses have undergone careful consideration so as to best showcase her features.  For lack of appropriate adjectives to truly describe the woman we must settle on “astonishing beauty rivalling that of a Greek goddess”.  But her best feature is by far her flourishing intellect. She is truly amazing in every aspect and as flawless as a hand crafted sculpture by God himself.

[kyle-jack543]

The Mysterious Man

His eyes looked like they had melted.

As if the sand of time were smelted.

I wanted to turn away from his sinister stare.

the laws must have been truly unfair.

Was it to tell people he was great?

Or that he had met his fate?

He looked as though he should not be.

Telling people they should flee.

Was he famous or convicted?

Only God could have predicted.

You could hear deaths chime.

As if to say he had no time.

A little “poem” I wrote when I was about 11, it is in regards to a stone bust.

[kyle-jack543]

I know

He sits there in silence thinking, over-thinking.  Finally he decides to turn on his computer so at least there is some sort of a noise to try and distract himself from his thoughts.  All of his previous attempts were futile and to no surprise the hum of the fans in his computer do nothing to dull his thoughts.  His next idea, music.  Music has always helped in the past; he appreciates music and has no reason to think it won’t at least help.  After all the music does in fact help faintly, it helps partially distract him from his thoughts.  The only downfall it’s only a distraction and it doesn’t fully mask his thoughts and only makes them quieter, he can still hear all them, and they are still there. His music is very poorly chosen as he forgets the point of listening to it if it doesn’t actually help, so in the end he just settles for sad music.  The sad music inevitably makes it worse, but what does he care, why should he care, no one else does, no one else has.  At this point he doesn’t think anyone ever will.  All he does with his time is surf through his socials.  He has one person that responds to him but he isn’t quite sure as to why just yet.  The only thing keeping him sane is this one person who hardly knows he even exists.  He wishes he could thank the person that has been helping him and apologise to them for being such a screw up.

[kyle-jack543]

Theory

The way I see it is simple, I can’t make or create anything.  I can only find and adjust very few and very specific things.  That’s why I have become accustomed to not telling anyone anything.  Even if you mean absolutely everything to me I will with-hold as much from you as I can, not because I have things I need to hide or don’t want found out.  I simply believe you don’t wish to know these things about me.  If you did want to know these sorts of things you would surely ask, and the fact you don’t ask generally worries me however,  I now know it is through no fault but my own.  you could show as much interest as humanly possible and I would still put up such a large front and reject the mere thought of opening up to you.  These things I keep from you or kept from you, I thought I was saving you or protecting you.  You see I truly do wish to tell you my deepest most intimate thoughts, but I have struggled in finding anyone I trust enough.  I just hope I can tell you in person my true feelings.

[kyle-jack543]

Just a short story or something

Her hair pink as the sunset, her smile as opaque as the moon.  At least that’s how he saw her, a flawless diamond perfected through time and subjected to many harsh environments yet tougher through the experiences.  Being unsure of the turmoil she had undergone he had to be careful in his approach. His heart pounding like the wings of an Albatross, body shaking uncontrollably.  He manages to keep his head as he gets closer.  He can’t think straight the second she looks at him; his suave, charismatic charm is gone he can barely speak yet manages to mumble out three words “Hey, how you?” instantly regretting his decision to speak to her.  Having just made a fool of himself, he retreats to safety but not before the shy girl could make the tiniest of subtle gestures.  The smallest of movements in the upper left of her lips.  He was so sure he’d ruined it all and she would never talk to him or even glance at him if they crossed paths again.  The movement she made was all he could think about, he just sat in silence replaying that instance over and over again in his mind thinking of all of the possible meanings of the movement or if it was just a coincidence.  He racks his mind for anything and everything he can think of yet nothing.  He’s now replayed the exact instance 43 times when something interrupts his train of thought.  It’s her right in front of him; he’s already lost in her eyes.  The brown smoky quartz with glimpses of the universe lost him until she spoke.  Her voice destroyed him, every layer; it was as though she was in his mind when she spoke, it felt so intrinsic he could not think of anything other than her, all of his senses were now focused on her and there was nothing he could do.  He had to accept it. He had to accept her; he wanted nothing more than too follow her from this moment on.  All she had said to him was “Hey”.