(insert clever title here)

| koe | 30 | neutral/masculine pronouns | libra/scorpio | intj | thrives on vodka | likes too many podcasts | If you follow and need anything tagged, let me know.

[unclefather]

[nayters]

[bubblegum-sullivan-13]

I also like it when they're like hey what's up or something personal/natural instead of the welcome to wherever how can I serve you bit.

[lastoneout]

I also like it when they are sitting down or listening to music they clearly enjoy

[fieldbears]

There is something so nourishing about walking into a place of business and immediately thinking "huh, I wouldn't have guessed this place would be playing this kind of music" only to see an employee absolutely head-banging along because today is their day to pick the CD and they are living

[somethingmissingthiswaycomes]

Despite what capitalists might think, I do not want to roleplay being royalty in the presence of slaves when I seek professional assistance in obtaining my basic human needs.

[squided]

tumblr should have achievements

[r4cs0]

[laughconfetti]

[beardedmrbean]

[squeakitties]

obsessed with this post because it forced me to pronounce “meatballs” in a way i never would have before. meæãt balls

[susiephone]

You EAT miette balls?!

[sweatermuppet]

strand of hair caught in hinge of glasses, 500 injured 300 dead

[shorepine-deactivated20200923]

[primrosetta]

OBSESSED with the fact that there’s a redditor out there who calls themselves “PISS BOT” but carries themselves with the unflappable politeness of a confused Victorian gentleman. 

[antique-scarecrow]

the most beautiful stories repeat themselves over and over and over again, time weaving itself into a blanket to warm our beds

[fodsley]

video game characters love to say "meet me at these coordinates"

[fodsley]

we should start doing this in real life too btw. I think it would be funny if your friend gave you latitude longitude coordinates that just led to your local Tescos

[liberalsarecool]

End wage theft.

[enbydemirainbowbigfoot]

Reblog to headbonk your mutuals like a cat full of love

[hallow-the-bear-deactivated2024]

get headbonked mutuals

[sufficientlylargen]

Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The eeb that deebs, the blorb that plinks!

’Twas Tumblr, and the slithy memes Did bode and call out on the dash: Fucken WIMDY were the shitpost streams, And of things was the trash.

“Beware the Jabberwock, my son! The eeb that deebs, the blorb that plinks! Beware of Shittos Glup, and shun Bendlebick Cumperdincks!”

He took his discourse sword in hand; Long time the chungus foe he sought— So rested he in the ball pit (free!) And sat awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish (derogatory) thought he sat, The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame, Came GIFfling through the old group chat, And hurgled as it came!

UWU! UWU! And through and through The discourse blade went "Um, actually, the Jabberwock is coded as friendly because 'eyes of flame' means red and orange, and those are warm and inviting colors according to 'color theory', which I guess you haven't heard of and don't understand." He left it dead, and with its head He man car door hook hand.

“And hast thou slain the Jabberwock? Come to my arms, my beamish boi! O #frabjousday! Sounds fake but okay!” He reblogged in his joy.

’Twas Tumblr, and the slithy memes Did bode and call out on the dash: Fucken WIMDY were the shitpost streams, And all of us were trash.

[deadreckon-deactivated20230712]

chess is improved by picking two pieces to be star-crossed lovers who cannot bring themselves to kill the other

[neomedievalist]

im at your girls house changing their pronouns

[effable-as-f]

[priestessamy]

Is this that Killers song

[jadetuin]

We always talk about giving a Victorian child a Cheeto Puff or Gatorade, but what about music? If I traveled back in time and blasted God Race by Metaroom they would absolutely perish.

[magspag]

I swear, the users on this site are like a bunch of garment factory owners, the way they are always obsessing about the what the limits a victorian child can endure before they perish.

[sistertaxon]

why are there so many posts about asexuals being immune to sirens. people. sirens don’t lure you in with sex (necessarily). they sing about whatever it is that you want most. they could sing about mothman or cinnamon toast crunch and guess what then your asexual pirate is fucking dead

[thesylverlining]

this is the only kind of ace discourse i ever want to see on my dash. the only kind. ever again. good job

[kittyknowsthings]

Do you think the sirens would be grateful that they finally get some variety? 

[systlin]

“Oh my god we can finally just sing about pasta thank the fucking gods.” 

[totohoy-blog]

I’m not asexual but I’m fairly certain sirens would do a far better job luring me into the depths with a song about pasta rather than sex…

[systlin]

I mean. 

“WHAT THE FUCK STAY AWAY FROM THE ROCKS.”

“FUCKER THEY SAID THEY HAVE FETTUCCINE CARBONARA AND HOT GARLIC BREAD OVER THERE HANG ON BITCH.” 

[musicalhell]

This is true; Odysseus heard them promising him knowledge of the future.  So the next time you see artwork like this:

Remember those sultry naked chicks are saying “We’ll tell you the winning lotto numbers.”

[fuckstaffposts]

Them: “We have unlimited wifi at incredible speeds~” Me: *diving headfirst into the water*

[rpluvsyj]

This post is a blessing

[wittyusername97]

Congratulations! Odysseus! You’ve been selected as a winner for the free $1000 Amazon Gift Card, Apple iPhone X 256G or Samsung Galaxy S8! Claim your prize now!

[kitvalkyrie]

Oh my god sirens were literally scam websites

[10thingsihateabout-all-yall]

Oh my god they were phishing

[yuumei-art]

Seeds For Tomorrow

Inspired by the brave Ukrainian woman who told the invading Russian soldier “Put sunflower seeds in your pocket so that sunflowers will grow when you die here.”

[floxy-offical]

(UNMUTE YOU WON'T REGRET IT)

(Source)

[goose-on-the-loose]

if you wanna learn more about why httyd‘s soundtrack is so fire please watch this video:

https://youtu.be/4UUJQH7GLms

(it’s not a rickroll i promise)

[strangesigils]

“I Live Well On My Own”

Have this sigil with you as you move out to live on your own and then keep it in your new home or apartment somewhere.