Untitled

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Nessian sun jokes

Cassian: I'm the sun. I rise every morning to light up your day.

Nesta: you're not hot enough to be the sun.

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Savage Nesta

Cassian: hey beautiful!

Nesta: wish I could say the same for you

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Nessian fighting

Cassian: sorry, i said the wrong thing.

Nesta: no, 537 years ago your mother gave birth to the wrong thing.

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Sad Cassian

Cassian [messy hair and clothes]:

Feyre: what happened to you?

Cassian: i don't want to talk about it

Nesta: good, we don't want to hear about it.

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Alphabet pick-up lines

Cassian: If i could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and I together.

Nesta: I think the alphabet should stay the way it is. With n next to o.

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Nessian connections

Cassian: I think you're pretty

Nesta: thanks

Cassian: I wish there was something between us...

Nesta: me too

Cassian: really?! like what

Nesta: A wall

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Prince Ali/Lord Cassie parody:

Cassian trying to impress Nesta

Feyre and Nesta [inside the house]:

[thumping music starts]

Feyre [on the balcony]: Nesta, come out and see this!

Nesta [comes onto the balcony]:

Velaris: Make way for Lord Cassie

Say hey! It's Lord Cassie

Cassian: Hey! Clear the way to my love Nesta

Hey you!

Let me through!

I’m a bright new star!

Oh Come!

Where is she, oh shoot, she’s up really high

Make way!

Here I come!

Ring bells! Bang the drums!

Oh, you're gonna love this guys!

Lord Cassie

Don't you worry

Your wings are still larger

Genuflect, show some respect

Down on one knee!

Now, try your best to stay calm

Cause I can be a real charm

So come and meet the spectacular Lord Cassie

Lord Cassie!

Mighty is he!

Go to the barber

Strong as ten regular men, definitely!

Rhysand: He fought in dangerous wars

Mor: A hundred bad guys with swords

Rhysand: Who sent those goons to their lords?

Mor & Rhysand: Why, Lord Cassie!

Velaris: He’s tried seventy-five times with Nesta

Rhysand: Doesn’t he look lovely Nesta

Velaris: Stupid comments

He's got fifty-three

Mor: Fabulous Cassie I love them all

Velaris: When it comes to big library-type monsters

Has he got issues

I'm telling you, he will eat all of your gravy

Cassian: Lord Cassie! Where is Nesty, She is my partner 

That physique! How can’t she see

Look more closely

Well, come and look at my hair

Adjust your sight and please stare

To gawk and grovel and stare at Lord Cassie!

Velaris: He's got ninety-five packets of gravy

Rhysand, Mor & Azriel: (He's got the gravy, let's see the gravy)

Velaris: And to eat them he charges a fee

Rhysand, Mor & Azriel: (He's generous, so generous)

Velaris: He eats it with chips that are wavy

Rhysand, Mor & Azriel:  Sometimes they are thin

Velaris: They bow to his whim love serving him

They're just lousy with loyalty to Cassie! Lord Cassie!

Lord Cassie!

Good-looking he! He’d make a good father

Cassian: I know Nesta’s a great sight lovely to see

Rhysand: And that Velaris is why, he got rejected and cried

Velaris: With sixty females, including Mor

Always flirting and trying

with Nesta and more

With his forty waiters, his cooks, his bakers

His bats that come right on key

Make way for Lord Cassie!

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Inner Circle

Rhysand: Where's Cassian?

Feyre: Doing stuff

Rhysand: I don't like the sound of that. Where's Azriel?

Feyre: Trying to stop Cassian from doing the stuff.

Rhysand: What? Then where's Mor?

Feyre: Trying to stop Azriel from stopping Cassian from doing the stuff.

Rhysand: And what are you doing?

Feyre: Stopping you from stopping Mor from stopping Azriel from stopping Cassian from doing the stuff.

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Inner circle

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Feyre first seeing Amren

Amren *sleeping*

Feyre: How ever did you manage to kill it?

Rhysand: Kill it? Oldest friend she is.

Feyre: I’m so sorry I didn’t mea-

Rhysand: Ah don’t worry yourself, you’re not alone. A seriously misunderstood creature Amren is. The eyes I reckon, they unnerve some folk.

Cassian *making pincers gesture and clicking sound*: Not to mention the pincers.

Rhysand: Yeah, and that too.

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Manorian

Manon [walks by and smirks at Dorian]

Chaol: lovely!

Dorian: All she wants to do is kiss me. 

Dorian [leans close to show Chaol his lips]: My lips are getting chapped, look.

Chaol [leaning away]: I’ll take your word for it.

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At Feyre’s art store

Cassian [holds up an artwork]: How much for this?

Feyre: 5 dollars.

Cassian: How much for me?

Feyre: 5 dollars.

Cassian: But I’m your friend!

Feyre: 10 dollars.

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Rowaelin children

Rowan: your children set Lorcan’s shirt on fire last night.

Aelin [very proud]: Did you really? How’d it go?

Rowan [nudges and smacks Aelin]

Aelin: I mean... that was very wrong indeed guys, very wrong of you.

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Angry Rhysand

Rhysand [in an angry tone to Cassian]: Where have you been?

Rhysand [in a happy tone]: Feyre, how wonderful to see you dear.

Rhysand [in an angry tone to Cassian]: Bed empty, no note, weapons gone, you could have died.

Rhysand [in a happy tone]: Ofcourse, I don’t blame you Feyre dear.

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Rowaelin

Aelin *love struck staring at Rowan*

Lysandra *clicks in Aelin’s face*: Hey

Aelin *comes back to reality*

Lysandra: He’s only interested in you because he thinks you’re the chosen one

Aelin: But I am the chosen one

Lysandra *smacks Aelin on the head*

Aelin: Okay sorry. I’m kidding.

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Bat Boys at the Summer Court

Tarquin: why is it when something happens, it is always you three

Rhysand:

Cassian:

Azriel: believe me Tarquin, I've been asking myself the same question for six years