\(' ')/

23, NYC. Remember to make somebody smile today!

[goawfma]

they gonna make us eat bugs while dumping toxic waste into the ocean

[whitepeopletwitter]

[thebootydiaries]

child: daddy when I grow up I want to be just like you

dad: you're just copying me to get successful and I'm gonna slay your career, you copycat flop little bitch

[petitetimidgay-deactivated20240]

i’m so cool and loveable and yet so single what’s up with that

[popokko-deactivated20210315]

tuch him gently.

tuch him ! but gently

[d1rtypaws]

When someone is explaining something to you and you get hit with the realization that you haven’t retained anything that has been said to you and the moment they stop talking you won’t be able to recall any part of it

[retrogamingblog]

Franken-mon made by CavezoneStudio

[boope]

[wizardnuke]

not to be a history fucker on main but the whole mystery of the lost colony of roanoke is so fucking funny

[wizardnuke]

governor of the colony: hey I’m gonna go back to england to get more supplies

115 colonists: okay

governor: ends up spending 3 years in england bc of a naval war with spain or some shit

governor: gets back to the colony to find everyone gone

governer: sees the word “croatoan”, the name of a native american tribe, carved into a post

croatoan tribe: has members and children with blonde hair/blue eyes, pale skin

everyone: what could have happened to the colonists of roanoke

[wizardnuke]

racism is a hell of a drug

[langernameohnebedeutung]

governor: I can’t believe my colony died

roanoke folks: actually these really nice people took us in? we left you a note about that? so please stop telling everyone we’re dead?

governor: Sometimes I Can Still Hear Their Voices

[whitlockienterprisespresents]

Some of those suspiciously mixed-looking Croatoan tribes-people were even still using the surnames of the Roanoke colonists! The degree to which ‘The Mystery of Roanoke’ is NOT EVEN SLIGHTLY MYSTERIOUS is fucking ridiculous! As an out-and-proud history fucker, I cannot tell you how mad I was when I decided to look into this ~super tantalising mystery~ only to find that it’s so dumb. It’s so dumb, guys.

[thisloveforyourmom]

some of them literally said “we are the descendants of the roanoke colonists”

[vortexsophia-deactivated2022110]

[veerletakino]

[pussyong-deactivated20200810]

none of you get laid be honest

[blackfairypresident]

you could curse a police officer out, kick their car, throw a temper tantrum and throw trash. and that still doesnt mean they get to kill you. what the fuck is wrong with yall? why do you think police get some special license to kill when they get disrespected?

if they cant do their job without murdering unarmed people, they dont deserve their badge, or anyones respect.

[aveline-shepard]

This is the type of behavior that is du jour for retail and service workers. We are expected to handle it patiently and professionally, even indulgently, but the police are allowed to respond to the same behaviors with murder in cold blood.

[chemfemme]

strange and weird that me not shaving my legs & leaving them in their natural fuzzy state and really never thinking about it is seen as an active choice, and maintaining nakey bald legs with careful weekly upkeep is seen as a default

[chubritza]

a confused florist

[chubritza]

what in carnation

[tomhiddlesun]

[crying-elf-lass-deactivated2020]

Fucking customers

[ruffrowdyboiz]

All customers everywhere must die

[thebootydiaries]

Me: *sees my stuffed animal on the floor next to my bed*

Me: Why wasn’t I a better parent

[methylbenzene]

[pissvortex]

5 years ago today

[aberrantemotion]

We should have another

[so-macho]

The mindfuck moment when you can split a cube into thirds

[supergameboytwo-deactivated2016]

okay but