Last quarter, I must have misconfigured something or allowed CCleaner to delete something it shouldn't have, because StarCraft II and Dota 2, among other programs, would crash frequently. Additionally, the Store app wouldn't open, so I couldn't upgrade to 8.1. I didn't have time during the quarter to dedicate to my computer being unusable for a reinstall or some other kind of maintenance, but I did take my hard drives home with me over break and use my old desktop to reinstall Windows. Then the fun began...
After about a week of smooth sailing, I booted it up one day to find that logging in took about 30 seconds, my desktop background did not appear, and the taskbar was blank except for the 8.1 start button, which is supposed to open the Metro start screen but instead did nothing. After some exploration, I found that I could open the task manager and just about any other program, but not Windows Explorer, the superprogram that controls the file browser and the taskbar and countless other functions. A few hours of Google and several reboots to and from safe mode did nothing. I tried to reinstall the OS from scratch, but I couldn't; according to the installer, "the drive where Windows is installed is locked." I certainly didn't give Windows permission to lock my SSD.
Luckily, a friend of mine recommended Process Hacker, a third-party task manager. From it, I was able to force-terminate Windows Explorer and run it again as an administrator. This solved my problems in desktop mode, so everything was fine for a while. But a few days later, I wanted to type something in Japanese, and the program in which I was typing locked up a few characters in. I tried again in a few other programs, and they locked up at the same point. It wouldn't be a problem right away, but it will certainly become one when I need to type for Japanese homework.
Then I came back to UW, and I knew it was entirely possible that the OS would develop even more problems migrating to new hardware. But, in fact, everything worked exactly how it did on my computer back home. The problem now was activation. I have another product key, so that's fine. I was expecting to have to type it in as soon as I booted. But the only place to type it in is the glorious Modern UI Settings app, which isn't starting. In fact, no Metro apps are starting, because they can't open when Windows Explorer is running with administrator privileges.
But recall that I can't open the start screen when Explorer is not running with administrator privileges. I dug around for the actual executable for the Store app to confirm that Metro doesn't work at all. But it only superficially works when the rest of Explorer is usable. It also doesn't work in Safe Mode. So it is impossible for me to enter my product key and get rid of the full-screen "Activate Windows" prompt that pops up every few hours when it's least convenient and forces me to wait before it gives me any way out.
Why is so much of the OS baked into one process? Why isn't it possible to use Metro when Explorer has admin privileges? Why isn't it possible to use Metro when Explorer isn't working? Why can't I enter my product key in the Desktop paradigm? Why does typing "ku" in Japanese mode freeze any program that's reading text input? Why did Windows lock my SSD? Why is Microsoft convinced that desktop operating systems are supposed to be obsolete? Once I figure out how to unlock my SSD, why should I ever use Windows again?