Title

here be my collection of nicknacks | he/him | Not a minor

[lazyloanshark]

Welcome to the blog!

I reblog stuff. Ramble sometimes. Waddya want from me.

#ramblings for my thought dumps

#drunkposting for bad posts (that I made while drunk)

[great-and-small]

We’re gonna getcha

[rnavka]

[rnavka]

[rnavka]

[thegalacticbucket]

[evilscientist3]

[ramranchcowboycocks69]

[sludgenaut]

[nighthaunting]

thought too hard about MRI machines today and had this come to me in a vision

[beesmygod]

mri accident is literally one of my biggest anxiety freakouts. i dont care about being in the tiny loud tube, im so scared of a secret piece of metal i dont know about in my body will tear through me like a knife through butter. what if i ate a quarter in my sleep

[neutral-wizard]

Quarters George who eats a $10 roll of quarters every night is shredded into a fine mist my the MRI

[its-grape-juice-i-swear]

TIME TO POST ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITE IMAGES!!!!

Back when I worked at the hospital, I had to take MRI training and it was my favorite thing every time. It was only like 10 minutes long and went a little something like this:

Hey. The MRI is basically a really big magnet and by basically I mean it is and we literally never turn it off. It's like really big. Really really big and powerful and The Magnet is always on. We don't turn it off Ever, for any reason. We mean it bro, The Magnet is literally always on. It's crazy strong and will definitely kill you. So don't bring any metal into the MRI room, man. You will fuck up the machine (because The Magnet is always on) and then you will die (again, because The Magnet is always on). Here's some fun questions for you to test your understanding!

1) The ______ is always on.

2) The Magnet is ______ on.

3) How often is The Magnet on?

4) The Magnet is always __.

5) The Magnet is always on. T/F

6) The Magnet is usually on but we know to turn it off for you because you're a very special boy :) T/F

7) My weak fleshy body can survive the wrath of The Magnet. T/F

8) Look at this 500 lbs steel hospital bed, which The Magnet has crumpled into an origami crane. Imagine if that was you.

9) Is The Magnet ever off?

10) Sometimes we turn The Magnet off. T/F

Thank you for taking MRI training. We hope you learned that The Magnet is always on, because it is. It's on Right Now and it will be on every time you come to the MRI. Have fun and remember: The Magnet is always on!

I love you MRI training. The Magnet is always on.

[pretentiouslimericks]

It feels like I’ve talked about this before, but to me the funniest version of Portal is if Chell is deaf.

Like, most of the major story beats, at least the ones that directly affect her, have a prominent visual component so she’s following along with the basics. But she has no idea who cave johnson is, or what wheatley was trying to explain to her, and she certainly wasn’t hurt by any of glados’ insults.

but the best part of this headcanon is imagining glados checking chell’s personnel file years down the line, noticing the word “deaf” for the first time, and just going “WHAT???”

[emptyjunior]

Glados learning sign language so Chell can hear at least one of her excellent monologues and Chell just closes her eyes

[junebug-jamboree]

[tomboyhousewife-deactivated2024]

queer people who have done zero self reflection when they see someone who doesn't look fem in their space

[predatory-lesbians]

ACTUALLY FUCKING THO

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

#the bioessentialism is gross and inescapable#‘oh i’m just not comfortable around this person bc i don’t know them!’#is that it? or is it that they’re masculine presenting and you only think of non-binary people as girl lite

[coelpts]

[gondorrevealparty]

Normal American Guy: have you seen what these "transgenders" are sexualizing? they're reenacting childhood experiences. it's disgusting and un-american.

Every Good Ol' American Rock Song: 🎸🎤 I can't stress enough how much this girl is underage 🎸 🎶

[hotvampireadjacent]

[girldraki]

[girldraki]

[angelic-odette]

When I say women should have higher standards for how they're treated, this is exactly what I mean. At the first insult? Kick. Him. To. The. Curb.

[fishing-princess]

I Defeated the Demon Lord but it Turns Out the Demon Army was Largely Unaffected and I Fell Victim to a Flawed Belief in Great Man Theory

[tredlocity]

[jingerpi]

[lunnefisk]

bworf

[lunnefisk]

i found bworf

[amazoogle]

the enemy drank water today. did you?

[ewoly5]

i drank water three days ago. im several steps ahead of the enemy. this is what it takes to win

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

"let's talk exclusively about crimes in which the suspect is black" was literally what bill o'reilly was doing on fox news when i was in elementary school 20+ years ago, and it was as tired and obvious then as it was back when the nazis were doing it about jews in the 30s, and now trans-men's-rights activists on tumblr are announcing "hey, anyone who would like to describe real or imagined sex crimes exclusively by trans women please form a line for the hate megaphone" like they think they just came up with something new

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

aw, you poor little guy, did the "women YOU'RE allowed to abuse" start talking to each other? you had to put them back in their place? eat shit & die

[dietofworm]

This chud ain't even being slick

[werewiire]

“counting or not counting transfem-on-transfem violence?”

[soshinee]

if u think abt it i guess bald ppl are the most aerodynamic. i bet if u shot a bald person out of a cannon they wld fly way further than a haired person

[soshinee]

which of course is a huge advantage in day to day life

[blurds]

this is the funniest thing I’ve seen in weeks

[luxshine]

The “Thunk” will always kill me.

[falconratesbirds]

14/10 doing his best

[littleguysdaily]