kitty

If you catch me here, I am probably supposed to be doing something else.

[dfsdgaefh]

fly high, haikyu-!

[shimmervee]

be sure to leave out milk and cookies for brutus tonight

[statelywingmanor]

You can leave as many cookies as you want but he’ll only et two

[shimmervee]

this remains the funniest addition anyone’s made to one of my posts

[normal-about-hollanov]

ilya makes a joke about getting shane pregnant ONCE and shane gets himself SO completely worked up because 'oh NO not ME ruin MY fucking hockey career? so you can DOMESTICATE me? you know what pregnancy even DOES to a person's body? I might never be able to play AGAIN you are NOT going to make me give up my DREAMS' his rant lasts a full ten minutes until ilya coaxes him back to bed n promises he will not knock him up until they retire then. its not until morning shane rubs the sleep from his eyes and remembers he can not. in fact. get pregnant. ilya valiantly only makes fun of him a little. (or a little by ilyas standards. at least.)

[criminalizegolf]

> read library book

> it's good

Thank you library

[fiercestpurpose]

> read library book

> it's bad

Thank you library for saving me from buying it :)

[official-library-posts]

official library post

[thisfeebleheart]

“On your knees,” Ilya said softly, just to see what he would do. Expecting Hollander to tell him to fuck off, Ilya’s breath caught in his throat as he watched him sink fluidly to the floor. His gaze stayed on Ilya. Those eyes that were always so sharp were now hazy with desire as he leaned forward to nuzzle and mouth at the bulge in Ilya’s sweatpants.

[chubby-cry-baby]

ilya and troy headcanons

they get matching tattoos (and are the ones convincing the centaurs to get a group matching tattoo when they win the stanley cup)

Ilya is Troy’s best man at his wedding

they constantly talk about the road trips they’re gonna take after they retire (shane and harris are the ones who make it logistically possible and troy and ilya are just adding more requests the whole time)

coordinated dance moves (“when did you guys even practice that?” “practice what?”)

“ilya rozanov and troy barrett being best friends for 8 minutes gay”

everything is somehow a two person job for them

somehow they accidentally match enough times that they get asked about it

they’re always paired up for social media content (and when they’re not, they mention the other way too much, “barrett would’ve picked the regular fries” or “rozanov didn’t like that movie”)

they make super dark daddy issues jokes

troy is kinda gullible and ilya is always giving him misinformation

they find out about an under funded women’s hockey team in ottawa and decide to sponsor it and start going to the games

Harris at some point: “this is my boyfriend Troy, and this is Troy’s boyfriend Ilya, and this is Ilya’s husband Shane”

“barrett when I was your age…” “shut up”

they don’t like hazing but they want to prank the rookies so they just take them out to dinner and the entire time the rookies are on edge that something is going to happen (“roz… barrett… just do it, just get it over with” “do what?” “the hazing” “we don’t haze rookies”)

MATCHING HALLOWEEN COSTUMES

[chevelleneech]

I need a fic where after Cliff, JJ, and Hayden find out, and all the guys are sitting around discussing how crazy it is that Shane and Ilya are together, Ilya does his braggadocios talk, being like: “He couldn’t resist me, obviously.” Only for Shane, maybe a tiny bit tipsy so he says under his breath although not quietly at all:, “I’m not the one who begged for it for two years straight.”

Thus Ilya gets lovingly flamed, because Thee Ilya Rozanov didn’t get to hit on night one!? Thee Ilya Rozanov not only had to beg for it, but spent two years no contact begging for it!?”

Delicious.

[isolabellz]

clingy

[ravelqueen]

Cockslut shane is so personal to me...

please that man is a harlot (affectionate) he needs it so bad...

the funniest thing Rachel ever did is have Ilya be the one with the Reputation but all his internal dialogue once he is In The Feelings is so mushy and romantic meanwhile Shane is over here going "I saw one (1) picture of gladiator!ilya and am gagged (driving 2 hours with a plug in) unfortunately" never change

[ok-notgood-probablybad]

I wanna be choked

[galecstatic]

recentering the exact moment shane realized he prefers being the hole rather than the peg

[exohd]

4000 x 2666

[hr-rep]

Shane revealing that Ilya begged for more then a full calendar year to fuck him to the Cens goes off like a bomb .

He thought the timeline reveal went crazy but, turns out, when you offer up that your now husband who was previously regarded as the King of the Sluts (affectionate) in the hockey world chased after you for two years. Yeah. That gets some mileage.

[exohd]

4000 x 6000

[laurenbknewyouweretrouble]

ETA: @queen-calanthe has written this into a real fic: The Suit In One-Four-One-Zero

One day post TLG, Harris has the Cens doing a video for social media, it’s a competition for who can keep a straight face while the others try to make them break with a smile or a laugh.

Towards the end, only Ilya remains. No one can break him, so they go get Shane. He’s got a little smile while they explain and he starts thinking of what to say. Of what he can say for a video going on the internet.

He hesitates, because he knows what he wants to tell Ilya, but keep it their secret. No one else needs to know what this was about, but he’s saved this tidbit, waiting to play it at the right time. Ilya’s steeling himself. He loves Shane and usually would smile with him just in the room, trying do be earnest about anything, but he won’t let his husband break him for this. Finally Shane makes direct eye contact with Ilya -

‘The first time, after the commercial,’

Ilya tenses, eyes light up but he’s keeping his face neutral. He isn’t sure what he thought Shane would say but it wasn’t this.

‘ while I was waiting for you -‘

‘I put on a suit and tie.’

Ilya has never been so happy to lose at something

[exohd]

6000 x 4000

[exohd]

6000 x 4000