To Die Loving~

I have lived. Through a hundred deaths, I have lived.

[lesserselfness]

━━⊱ ✦ Welcome to My Blog ✦ ⊰━━

A little about Myself:

- I go by the name Faye over here.

- I am 17 yo, will turn 18 on the 6th of June!!! ^^

- I use he/they pronouns and I'm straight.

- I am very chill, I reply to all the dms and asks(I try my best) but do

check my DNI list first :)

- I am not looking forward to date anyone here.

- I care very deeply about injustices and I can't keep myself from

speaking about them, neither am I apologetic about being outspoken.

- I tend to yap a lot and I am a very big nerd for a lot of things.

- I'm sorry but I don't do tag games(I'll make a diff blog I promiseee)

- I speak English, Hindi and Urdu.

- I am an Indian Muslim.

My Interests:

- Reading: non-fiction, literary fiction, urban fiction, social critique, literary realism, Philosophy, classics and modern literature, comics, Social Economics, Socialist literature, Sufi literature. (I read everything except books with JUST romance or smut in them)

- Writing: (Lament, Prose, Long, Political, Revolution, Resistance, Societal critique, Chiastic) Poems, Habsiyat, Ghazaliat and Nazmein.

- I play Chess, Table Tennis and Football.

- I loved riding motorcycles and GoKarting.

- Reading about random stuff, like absolutely random stuff. Like did you

know moon smells like gunpowder? Funfact- it doesn't and it's just

because how our spacesuits are made lol :)

- I'm firstly a math and physics nerd!(that's also what I actually study)

My Favs:

- Books: I and Thou, The Conference of the Birds, The Setting Sun, No Longer Human, Critique of Pure Reason, Religion vs Religion, Beyond Good and Evil, The Myth of Sisyphus, Letters to Milena :P

- Movies (I dont watch alot): All of Miyazaki's films!!! Detachment, The Pianist, Avatar(I haven't watched the 2nd and 3rd yet), Mickey 17, The Dead Poets Society, 10 Things I hate About You, Good Will Hunting.

DO NOT INTERACT!!!

If you are any of these:

MAGA, Zionist, Homophobic, Islamophobic, Bigot, Pro-Establishment, Fascist sympathiser(yes you libs), Pro-BJP, Hindutvadi, Incels, Femcels, Misogynist, Creepy old men and just Negative energy ppl.

*I am very open to difference in opinion, but that doesn't override my basic empathy for humans and humanity.

HMU -

Everyone else hehe ^^

(Last Edited: 13th May 2026)

[purelypretentious-hana]

sometimes i wonder if this is all growing up ever was—learning to live with the absurdity of wanting wildly while settling quietly. learning to mourn the lives you didn’t live. learning to keep showing up.

[lesserselfness]

Eid has dawned, but my beloved is not here

Eid has dawned, but what's the meaning of Eid if my darling is not here

Then what's the meaning of Eid if my beloved has not come

Oh God take care of them!

Adornments do not seem right

Nothing is pleasing to my sight

The happy ones sleep peacefully, while I spend my nights in grief

My Eid is only when my love comes back, without my beloved Eid is empty

They did not tell me while leaving, to what country my letters are to arrive

[najmadiarys]

[lesserselfness]

I wanna be that pink jacket girl!!!!!!

[lesserselfness]

How to shitpost chat!!! I wanna be cool too

[lesserselfness]

Taj Mahal

Oh dear Mumtaz

The shcistic shah is devasted with your departure,

you are now venerated after your passing,

you are now tributed in hundreds of our poems,

you are now revered within the soul of this mausoleum.

This appaling structure symbolising of great love stands before us,

the marble surfaces speak of your pure soul O Mumtaz,

the white dome flaunts your sweeping curves O Mumtaz,

the jewels inlayed resemble of your gentleness O Mumtaz,

But dear O dear

What righteous soul, worthy of a heavenly cementry demands such a marvel

What gentleness wants a resting place never known to mankind

What of God's work you could have done O Mumtaz!

Agates came from Arabia and the little boy in your kingdom starved,

Turquoise came from Tibet and the land of your farmers was infertile,

Sapphire came from Ceylon and the women kept waiting for their beloved to return,

A symbol of love for the Monarch, while a hundred loves suffered beneath

O Mortal Shah detached from his people,

Perhaps death is the only loss you fear.

[digitalcommiediary]

tomorrow is the last national tests and then i’ll finally be free

can’t wait to do so much drugs and be free

[lesserselfness]

Real guys!!!! Pls pray for me everybodyyyy!!!! I know I'm getting fucked, I've procrastinated for way toooo long than I should've been T_T

[lesserselfness]

What’s your favourite topic to write about?

hmm... love, life and god; they're also just a single thing maybe :)

[lesserselfness]

Hey Everyone!

A dear friend of mine @s1renflesh (I can't tag her, don't ask why), lost access to her blog and wants you guys to consider that blog inactive for the time being.

Here's a ss of the text I got from her on pinterest-

If any of her moots do come across this post, she requested you guys to reblog this.

Thank you

[lesserselfness]

Ask the moon if she knows your name,

don't be suprised if she goes hiding again.

Let me be worthy of your love,

if not in this life, then maybe the next.

[lesserselfness]

Jab meri mayyat ke paon qabr me honge

جب میری میّت کے پاؤں قبر میں ہوں گے

Jab keedon ki bhi mehfil lagi hogi

جب کیڑوں کی بھی محفل لگی ہوگی

Tab bhi mere dil mein tum hi basi hogi

تب بھی میرے دل میں تم ہی بسی ہوگی

Meri lash pe tera naam likha hoga

میری لاش پہ تیرا نام لکھا ہوگا

Mera har zarra teri mehek se bhara hoga

میرا ہر ذرّہ تیری مہک سے بھرا ہوگا

Cheer kar dekh lena mujhe ek baar, andar sirf tera hi ehsaas basa hoga

چیر کے دیکھ لینا مجھے ایک بار, اندر صرف تیرا ہی احساس بسا ہوگا

Tum kabhi utar na saki mere dil se

تم کبھی اتر نہ سکی میرے دلسے

Chalo isi junoon mein meri maghfirat ho gayi

چلو اسی جنون میں میری مغفرت ہو گئی۔

[lesserselfness]

TW- de*th

// When my corpse's legs hover above a grave

When the maggots are arranging a feast

Even then, my heart is filled with your love

My body will still bear your name

Every spec of me is still fragrant with your scent

Tear me apart, do me in pieces, you will only find another you in me

You've never left the varandas of my heart

And oh God am I pardoned off my sins for your love

[lesserselfness]

Jab meri mayyat ke paon qabr me honge

جب میری میّت کے پاؤں قبر میں ہوں گے

Jab keedon ki bhi mehfil lagi hogi

جب کیڑوں کی بھی محفل لگی ہوگی

Tab bhi mere dil mein tum hi basi hogi

تب بھی میرے دل میں تم ہی بسی ہوگی

Meri lash pe tera naam likha hoga

میری لاش پہ تیرا نام لکھا ہوگا

Mera har zarra teri mehek se bhara hoga

میرا ہر ذرّہ تیری مہک سے بھرا ہوگا

Cheer kar dekh lena mujhe ek baar, andar sirf tera hi ehsaas basa hoga

چیر کے دیکھ لینا مجھے ایک بار, اندر صرف تیرا ہی احساس بسا ہوگا

Tum kabhi utar na saki mere dil se

تم کبھی اتر نہ سکی میرے دلسے

Chalo isi junoon mein meri maghfirat ho gayi

چلو اسی جنون میں میری مغفرت ہو گئی۔

[lesserselfness]

what the fuck is life!!!

[lesserselfness]

Chal to diye saath saath چل تو دیے ساتھ ساتھ ab jo gham aaye iske baad aaye اب جو غم آئے اس کے بعد آئے Mohabbat ne maangi supurdgi محبت نے مانگی سپردگی ab jo dehshat aaye iske baad aaye اب جو دہشت آئے اس کے بعد آئے Duniya ke liye to bohot kuch baaqi hai abhi دنیا کے لیے تو بہت کچھ باقی ہے ابھی ab jo sitam-e-jaan aaye iske baad aaye اب جو ستمِ جاں آئے اس کے بعد آئے Zamaane se to ladna hai umr bhar زمانے سے تو لڑنا ہے عمر بھر ab jo khushi ke chaar pal aaye iske baad aaye اب جو خوشی کے چار پل آئے اس کے بعد آئے Yunhi tadapte tadapte zindagi mayasir hogayi یوں ہی تڑپتے تڑپتے زندگی میسر ہو گئی ab jo mera mehboob aaye iske baad aaye اب جو میرا محبوب آئے اس کے بعد آئے Ek baar ke dedu shahadat is inquilab ki ایک بار کہہ دوں شہادت اس انقلاب کی ab jo yaum ul qiyaam aaye iske baad aaye اب جو یومُ القیام آئے اس کے بعد آئے

[lesserselfness]

~ We have started to walk side by side now whatever sorrows are to come our way, let them be Your love has demanded me of my devotion now whatever dreads are to come our way, let them be The world is yet to see our manifold of symphony now whatever threats to life are to come, let them be Our struggle against our time is to continue forever now whatever few moments of joy are to come, let them be Our lives will have ended with the same struggles in our bare hands now whenever my beloved is to come, let them be Let me witness the revolution just for once now whenever the day of resurrection is to come, let it be....

[lesserselfness]

Chal to diye saath saath چل تو دیے ساتھ ساتھ ab jo gham aaye iske baad aaye اب جو غم آئے اس کے بعد آئے Mohabbat ne maangi supurdgi محبت نے مانگی سپردگی ab jo dehshat aaye iske baad aaye اب جو دہشت آئے اس کے بعد آئے Duniya ke liye to bohot kuch baaqi hai abhi دنیا کے لیے تو بہت کچھ باقی ہے ابھی ab jo sitam-e-jaan aaye iske baad aaye اب جو ستمِ جاں آئے اس کے بعد آئے Zamaane se to ladna hai umr bhar زمانے سے تو لڑنا ہے عمر بھر ab jo khushi ke chaar pal aaye iske baad aaye اب جو خوشی کے چار پل آئے اس کے بعد آئے Yunhi tadapte tadapte zindagi mayasir hogayi یوں ہی تڑپتے تڑپتے زندگی میسر ہو گئی ab jo mera mehboob aaye iske baad aaye اب جو میرا محبوب آئے اس کے بعد آئے Ek baar ke dedu shahadat is inquilab ki ایک بار کہہ دوں شہادت اس انقلاب کی ab jo yaum ul qiyaam aaye iske baad aaye اب جو یومُ القیام آئے اس کے بعد آئے

[dastur-e-ishq]

phir yunh hua kay ek dusray ko taktay rahain yunhi // wo andaaz e bayaan say qaasir, mein lafz e ibtida say aajiz

— Then it so happened, we remained lost in each other’s gaze; they were restrained in expression, and I, unable to speak

[lesserselfness]

humara yunh bichadna to muqaddar tha hi // chalo milna ek bahana ban hi gaya, meri zindagi ko ek naya sahara mil hi gaya — We were destined to seperate this way; our meeting has only given my life a reason to hang on to

[depsidase]

[lesserselfness]

I wanted the church and my ministry seperated, for the good of me because the people in robes were inconsiderate. In the name of God, I was depraved of my humanity. The world is at it again, my ministry has abandoned me, the ones I deemed worthy have turned into monsters themselves. The men in robes have found the way of god again! What is this course of duality, one being and the other becoming! It is the power that corrupts, it is the hunger for more that corrupts. May thy lord give you the sense of love! We are one and we are all!