Let's get that subtext going @lethalloki - Tumblr Blog

valeria2067

Trump supporters: Leave Ivanka out of this! Only assholes go after a President’s daughter!

Trump on Twitter: *Goes after Chelsea Clinton, a President’s daughter*

Chelsea Clinton: *Politely drags his lying ass*

breaking news: harry potter has quit his job as an auror!

stating that ‘i have no idea why i thought that was a good idea, holy shit’, potter has since relocated to diagon alley and reopened florean fortescue’s ice cream parlour. in a comment, potter said ‘yeah. yeah, this seems more like it’ and added ‘i mean, he gave me ice cream that one time. loved that guy.’

jasonptodd

with how fucked up gotham is i bet the cost of living is mad low…bruce probably isn’t even that rich…he moves to metropolis and is middle class…

notlikethemoviess

Back to the Future (1985) dir. Robert Zemeckis

“If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits 88 miles per hour… you’re gonna see some serious shit.”

hustleinatrap

damn

gallows-walker-deactivated20170

edwardspoonhands

And here I am trying to think of a problem I have that I don’t think is my fault…

best-of-memes

The clam before the storm

aplaceofhisown-deactivated20180

What an aesthetically pleasing meme.

sneetchstar

I think this is it. My aesthetic. The sea, a beautiful sky, and a pun.

dovewithscales

Bless this post.

choppedandfoodnetwork

gyaruundertaker-deactivated2020

the-gif-princess

mythicalpiranha-moved-deactivat

IM LAUGIHNG HARDER THAN EVER RIGHT THIS SECOND

thischick25

Reblogging this again because Chris just made me realize that sheep are so stupid that I can’t even think like them:

These sheep? They are actually running away from the car.

They are so stupid that they’re following each other in a circle around the thing they are running from.

SHEEPNADO

@echolodreg

I don’t care if I’ve reblogged this before, it’s still true.

muntazir

Why can’t there be a male hooter’s equivalent where male servers are shirtless and highly sexualized for their bodies and looks

sourkey-deactivated20190602

Male Strip clubs. You’re thinking of male strip clubs.

stupidswampwitch

No. Not a male strip club. A strip club is a strip club. I want a place called Cahones where waiters wear Speedos and are forced to stuff if they don’t fill out their uniform well enough. I want them to giggle for my tips. I want it to be so normalised and engrained in our culture that women bring their daughters there for lunch (because whaaaaaat the wings are good! Geeze sensitive much?) where they’ll give playful little nudges like, “Wouldn’t mind if you dad had those. Heh heh heh.” that their daughters don’t even understand but will absorb and start to assume is just the normal way grown up women talk about grown up men. I want to playfully ask my waiter if I can have extra nuts on my salad and for him to swat my arm with an Oh, you because he knows if he doesn’t his manager will yell at him. I want other men to pretend to like going there so I think they’re cool. I want to go to Cahones during my lunch break at work and when I come back and tell the other women in the office where I went they chuckle slightly and the men around us suddenly feel self conscious and they don’t know why.

mhysa-daenerystargaryen

A married couple went to the hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the mother's labor pain to the baby's father. He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it. The doctor set the pain transfer to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before. However, as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and kick it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husband's blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this point, they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well. Since the pain transfer was obviously helping out the wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic. When they got home, the mailman was dead on the porch.

smoothsister-deactivated2016032

OH MY GOD I HAVE BEEN READING THIS FOR MONTHS NOW I GET IT

thegreatbigfourmain

I DONT GET IT

muntazir

Why can’t there be a male hooter’s equivalent where male servers are shirtless and highly sexualized for their bodies and looks

sourkey-deactivated20190602

Male Strip clubs. You’re thinking of male strip clubs.

stupidswampwitch

No. Not a male strip club. A strip club is a strip club. I want a place called Cahones where waiters wear Speedos and are forced to stuff if they don’t fill out their uniform well enough. I want them to giggle for my tips. I want it to be so normalised and engrained in our culture that women bring their daughters there for lunch (because whaaaaaat the wings are good! Geeze sensitive much?) where they’ll give playful little nudges like, “Wouldn’t mind if you dad had those. Heh heh heh.” that their daughters don’t even understand but will absorb and start to assume is just the normal way grown up women talk about grown up men. I want to playfully ask my waiter if I can have extra nuts on my salad and for him to swat my arm with an Oh, you because he knows if he doesn’t his manager will yell at him. I want other men to pretend to like going there so I think they’re cool. I want to go to Cahones during my lunch break at work and when I come back and tell the other women in the office where I went they chuckle slightly and the men around us suddenly feel self conscious and they don’t know why.