2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Sade Olutola
Peter Solarz
tannertan36
oozey mess
PR's Tumblrdome
h
blake kathryn
dirt enthusiast
noise dept.
No title available
Mike Driver
DEAR READER
wallacepolsom
roma★
shark vs the universe
★
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
taylor price
@theartofmadeline
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from T1
seen from Ukraine
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Mexico
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Peru
seen from United States
seen from Türkiye
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Ukraine
seen from France
seen from United States
@lezrrrrrrr
ilya sliding his belt out of his loops in the irina foundation changing room and both shane and hayden flinching instinctively because jackie pike got talked back to by her bratty husband one too many times and sent him to ilya for behaviour correction & to learn manners send tweet
there are many reasons why bruise kink is a big fat win for hollanov. but v important is that, though leaving identifiable sex marks is expressly forbidden by the Homophobic Powers That Oversee Shane's Anxiety, if shane shows up to metros optional morning skate with the same bruise on his obliques that everyone saw yesterday after the game, but today its aggravated, pulsing purple and red and maybe abraded in spots, that's literally fine. they're just gonna think he slept on it wrong or the bruise got worse over night. classic. normal. happens every day to every man in homoerotic ice life.
they will NOT ☝ think that the bruise is aggravated because ilya put his mouth on it and sucked at it for an hour (until shane sobbed like a hurt lil coyote and came so hard he sorta blacked out), to complete the check ilya began during the game by putting shane into the boards in the first place and causing this beautiful bruise (foreplay)! but that is what happened (what they planned) 😌 and this IS how we get all of the benefits without any of the worries. soothing possessive pain kink for hungry coyote and his tundra predator. in public and private. so considerate. so mindful. so hockey. so eviscerating.
like! testing the limits of what people will clock as a hockey bruise and a sex bruise is soooo hot!!!
shane gets into a scrum where someone drags him down to the ice by his collar and doesn't let go and he ends up w a ragged neck bruise and near whiplash. and he's staring at the growing dark puce line of the bruise in the locker room mirror post shower. launching himself at his phone. texting with shaking hands: be fucking ready
lily replies in less than a minute: where is it
lily: pic
jane: i'm in the fucking locker room. just. be ready. 40 minutes
lily: pic.
lily: pic pic pic
jane: fuck's sake
lily: no. my sake. now.
jane: [shitty bathroom stall picture of the bruising blooming around the base of his neck]
lily: i kill sebby for this
lily: i fuck you in this stall bare
lily: bite until your blood drip on floor
and shane knocks his head against the stall door and reaches down --
lily: do not jerk off.
shane groans and grips himself.
lily: no.
lily: my sake only
and shane lets go and gets the hell out of dodge and to ilya's house for his (and ilya's) just desserts (sucking, fucking, bloodletting).
and maybe hayds does notice! he gets upset on shane's behalf before practice the next day, bc "what the fuck did sebbin do, man. that's fucked," and shane has been flushed the whole morning, shrugs a shoulder and focuses on tying his skates with his neck bruised to hell, splotchy and aching with every move, and just says, "it's okay, i asked for it. it's the game."
'You call the shots, babe I just wanna be yours'
so I introduced my friend to Shane Hollander reinvents free use out of his own beautiful mind and we realized that there is EXCELLENT fodder for an epistolary format Social Media AU where it's just Ilya Rozanov's increasingly more unhinged and frantic reddit posts to r/BDSMcommunity.
Like, neither of them understands fully the BDSM dynamics they're working with. It absolutely works for them but they don't have the language or set parameters or any of that. It's vibes all the way down.
Shane has that man STRESSED. Poor Ilya is going to have to learn SO much about this shit because Shane's just like "so... what if 🤔 you chased me naked in the woods and then when you caught me you could do whatever you wanted with me? 3, 2, 1 - go🏃🏻!"
Ilya's frantically googling "okay to chase boyfriend in woods and fuck him? reddit" with one hand while pulling on his shoes to run out after him
Shane asks about bondage one day and Ilya thinks he means like cuffs instead of Ilya just holding his wrists down while they fuck and is like “hot, absolutely.” And then two weeks later, Shane’s spontaneously invented the idea of Shibari and suspension harnesses
Ilya's like "WAIT HOLD UP HOLLANDER 🙅🏼 I am on refugee status still, I cannot accidentally kill you" frantically googles "suspension harness without killing boyfriend reddit"
Shane just, of his own accord, starts holding Ilya’s dick in his mouth after blowing him bc he likes how it feels and the way Ilya’s hand stays in his hair. With his other hand, Ilya is frantically googling “sub not wanting to stop blowjob sign of subdrop reddit”
He can't find a good enough answer so he finally posts in r/BDSMcommunity (burner account, of course) "Sub fell asleep cockwarming, okay to move? Urgent ask."
And then like a week later, after some very deep reddit rabbit holes and a few mostly helpful comment threads on the post he made, Ilya has to sit Shane down and be like “you are not only person who likes to keep a cock warm but we probably need to talk about parameters if we are going to keep doing it”
Something something, sometime after Shane moves to Ottawa, he starts accidentally-on-purpose wearing Ilya’s ties into the arena for player arrivals. Ilya jokingly suggests he’s going to start making Shane wear them in bed since he likes them so much, and Shane practically starts vibrating
A few more frantic reddit posts later, r/BDSM has kindly pointed Ilya in the direction of collars and also asked him, yet again, where on earth he managed to find this guy
Someone asks how open their relationship is
"just shooting my shot 👀"
"Shoot somewhere else before I shoot first"
"Heard 👐🏼"
i like to imagine that rose realized she was bi sometime during the hollanov outing and sensibly doesn't mention it because she doesn't want to add anything to shane's brain. then she forgets that she didn't tell him and so whenever she talks about girls, shane just thinks she's being a typical Straight Girl that toes the line of romantic for no reason. when she talks about how much she would like to meet svetlana for very not straight reasons, shane tells sveta and is like. she wants to be Friends.
cut to rose very excitedly calling shane one morning to tell him about how she and svetlana finally hooked up, and shane listens in absolute DISBELIEF because what the fuck since when did you like girls. meanwhile ilya knew she was bi since before she knew it and had just assumed it was an open secret
Shane has always been a big napper. When he was young, school really tired him out. So many different people around him for such an extended period of time, expectations of certain behaviour, having to socialise, having to pay attention, having to answer questions, the constant hum of fluorescent lights overhead. He came home exhausted and in need of a nap more often than not. There were also the panics. Sometimes they were big, sometimes they were small, but they usually left him feeling wrung out and he didn't really function well until he'd had a nap after one. Becoming a professional hockey player hasn't changed this, if anything it's made it a useful skill. A little post-practice nap is sometimes just the thing he needs and a pre-game nap can make all the difference to his play. With the constant travelling and endless timezone changes, napping becomes a necessity.
Ilya, however, never quite got the hang of it. He knows a lot of his teammates nap whenever and wherever, falling asleep before games in hotel rooms or resting up on the road, snores filling the team bus or plane, but Ilya can't quite get there. It's probably a remnant from childhood, from not feeling safe enough to let his guard down like that. He can't even imagine what the reaction would have been if his father had come home to find him asleep on the couch. He was certainly quick enough to accuse him of laziness without Ilya handing over additional ammunition for free.
But Ilya loves holding Shane when he naps. He loves how quickly his body grows lax, loves the gradual shift in the depth of his breaths, loves the warmth of his body pressed against him, loves his sleepy little sounds and scrunched little face when he wakes up, loves that Shane trusts him enough to be that vulnerable around him. Shane doesn't really know that Ilya doesn't nap, not with how often Ilya's the one to suggest one, not with the way Ilya makes sure to feign coming out of sleep as soon as he feels Shane shift in his arms in that particular way that suggests he's waking up. He doesn't want to risk Shane feeling like Ilya's doing him a favour with holding him through his naps, doesn't know whether he can admit how much he loves their naps even though they never include Ilya falling asleep. He likes the way things are. He doesn't want to risk it changing.
Eventually it does change though. Not because Shane discovers Ilya's secret of never actually falling asleep but because, a few years into their marriage, Ilya start... actually falling asleep. He never plans to. He loves getting to spend that time resting with Shane while staying alert enough to catalogue his every sleep-muddled sigh, his every shift. He just feels so warm, so full of love, so incredibly safe that one day he just... drifts off. After that it keeps happening. He has Shane in his arms, he's enjoying his breathing, he's loving this moment, he doesn't want to lose consciousness, he wants to stay in it, but his eyelids are drooping. He lets them shut, just for a minute, but then he wakes up to Shane's smiling face, his eyes soft and sleep-warm, his hands gentle as they cradle Ilya's face and run through his curls, and he can't be mad at himself for having missed out on those precious moments if this is what he gets to wake up to. Time is no longer a limited resource. Safety is no longer conditional on remaining alert. He has the rest of his life to enjoy this, to let himself be lulled to sleep by Shane's breathing and waking up to his soft touches. He can let his eyes drift shut and trust that Shane will still be there when he wakes.
Only been watching The Pitt for a few days but Mel King is THE best autistic character ever written in a medical drama. She doesn't "make connections no one else can" or "just see things differently" or any other Savant with Special Abilities stereotypical bullshit, she's a resident physician who's exactly as intelligent and capable as any other resident physician in the same year. She hates unnecessary yelling because it's loud and annoying, not because she's completely incapable of handling conflict. She usually keeps her stimming subtle enough to hide but sometimes she can't. She loves having a furry critter to pet. She accommodates an autistic patient by lowering the lights and closing the doors because she understands the sensory nightmare of an active medical setting. She speaks in a straightforward and honest way but she isn't an overtly rude inconsiderate asshole. She misses some jokes and takes things too literally on occasion but she does have a sense of humor and she is funny. She speaks up against misinformation and parent panic about autism and other developmental disabilities. She has emotions. She looks at a video of a lava lamp on her phone to chill. Doctor Mel King you have my entire heart
More PWHL roselana for your enjoyment
myshane would Not fail the “name a female athelete” challenge because he has the entire pwhl and womens national teams roster memorized however he would fail a “name a nonhockey athelete” challenge
Saw something earlier that mentioned Ilya becoming a PWHL coach when he retires and it’s completely rewritten my concept of Ilya as a character.
Yes absolutely he is becoming a PWHL coach. He’s doing constant promotional work to expand the league and its audience and doing interviews where he talks shit about all the creeps and losers in and running the NHL. “if me and my husband, Shane Hollander, had been female hockey players, we would have been criminally under paid and almost entirely ignored despite our epic love story. These women take their jobs incredibly seriously and play outstanding hockey. Of course some of them want to kiss each other. Would happen more in the NHL if the vile behavior of some players was not both tolerated and supported by teammates, coaches, and administrators.”
His players love him, the owners don’t understand his methods but can’t argue with results, and the NHL is actively pursuing their second defamation lawsuit against him even as they are actively trying to prevent Luca from doing public appearances with his new husband.
Now that they have his undivided attention, Shane becomes a regular guest commentator for PWHL games (never for Ilya’s team though, he’s in the stadium for those generally) and becomes a highly regarded figure for many PWHL fans.
Also, Shane Hollander loves lesbians. He goes out for mojitos and grain bowls with some of the women from Ilya’s team every month and they all get a little tipsy and grill each other about hockey stats and house renovations. He suddenly discovers the appeal of arranging play dates for your kids when he can hang out with some of the other SAPs and talk about play off chances and the fact that the team is on a road trip during the local spring break week while the kids play with foam blocks in the living room.
So after Shane leaves the Metros, the team starts sending out Hayden Pike to do press to cover their asses and keep their more asshole-ish players from saying slurs in front of reporters.
After one inconsequential game, a reporter asks about what Coach Theriault and Hayden think of the future of hockey with their former star player playing with his husband. Theriault says some shitty PR nothing answer laced with so much disdain that Hayden just. can't. take. anymore.
Obviously his team wants him to shit-talk his best friend and de facto brother-in-law who happen to be playing the best hockey of a generation (he will never let Ilya know he thinks this). The reporter obviously is chomping at the bit for a "dissension in the locker room" story that will make his life even more miserable. So, fuck the both of them.
"and how about you Hayden, what do you think about the future of hockey with Hollander and Rozanov?"
"Well, I think they should get on having kids, like surrogacy or adoption of something"
Dead silence, the reporter blinks in confusion. He can feel the glare coming off Theriault burning into the side of his face. He doesn’t turn his head and blithely goes on.
“Yeah, specifically 3 girls. I have 3 girls so if they have 3 girls, we’d have a whole hockey team to start in the pee-wees and get to the PWHL. My Ruby would obviously be a defender. She’d spend her whole life in the box, but she'd be such a good enforcer, especially if she was playing with her sisters. Jade is sneaky fast, so forward for her. And I know Amber is a baby, but I swear she’s got goalie eyes. My son Arthur is already the peacemaker of the family, so Uncle Shane could start training him up on all the rules so he can be our ref. But Shane and Ilya would have to get themselves another defender and a right or left wing with a center. Yep, that’s the future in hockey I’d love to see with Hollander and Rozanov”
Thus Hayden makes headlines bigger than any other time in his whole career. His time in the locker room does get shittier, but it’s all worth it for the call from Shane telling him that Ilya loved his vision of the future so much he cried looking at baby girl names online and researching PWHL teams.
The Cens are in the locker room after a pretty light practice, the season not yet in full swing, and the topic turns to married life, as it often does.
Ilya and Shane mostly stay quiet, giving each other pointed looks when Bood and Wyatt swap stories about their fucking awesome wives. That is until…
“Yeah but like, Roz and Hollzy have the most ideal situation.”
There’s a mix of eyebrow raising and general murmurs of agreement, half of the team unsure if this is Holmberg’s way of coming out.
“What do you mean?” Shane asks, ever one to ignore a social rule.
“You spend all day together kicking ass and being the best at hockey, and then you get to go home together and be and love and shit but also still talk hockey.” Holmberg sighs and stares into his locker a little wistfully. “I wish I was gay so I could have a hockey husband.”
The team is quiet for a minute, some of the younger members nodding in sage agreement. Bood even looks like it’s an intriguing idea.
“Why don’t you date a PWHL player?”
Wyatt says it with it much fuss, shoving his pads into his bag unceremoniously. Holms, however, looks like he’s just been struck by lightning.
“Say that again.”
Wyatt turns to the kid, eyebrows raised like he’s confused by the reaction.
“You know that the PWHL exists, right?”
Holmsberg is too thunderstruck to scoff.
“Yeah. The Charge. They’re…oh my god.”
And thus starts the social media scrolling to figure out which Charge players are 1) single, 2) in Holms age range, and 3) into men
MyShane is uncomfortable showing physical affection in public after years of being so deep in the closet he didn't even let himself recognise his own sexuality. However, that is so dramatically overshadowed by how possessive he is over Ilya. All Ilya has to do is smile at a pretty waitress and Shane is in his lap with his tongue so far down his throat it makes intubation look non-invasive in comparison.
I personally believe that Shane loves fishing with David but Ilya can’t imagine anything worse than sitting in a boat and waiting for hours, so he stays home with Yuna and they watch Steel Magnolias with face masks on and an entire bottle of wine each
It's their second summer at the cottage. They'd been there 5 days so far when Shane tentatively approaches Ilya in the kitchen.
"Hey, so, uhh...," he hesitates. Ilya raises an eyebrow. Shane hadn't seemed this nervous around him since last summer.
"Everything okay?"
"Yea. Yea, everything's great. I just, well, I know you're only here for a couple of weeks but I wondered if you'd be ok with spending some time with my parents," Shane looked away how he always did when he was nervous.
Ilya's heart melted a bit.
"I mean. You can say no. I know we don't have a lot of time just the two of us. It's just that my dad and I have a tradition. We go fishing every summer and we didn't go last year so I thought maybe-"
"Of course we can Hollander."
"Really? I mean, we don't have to if you'd rather us stay here. I know we don't get to spend a lot of time together and if you'd rather just do something else we can. I won't be upset or anyth-"
"Hollander, is fine. We will go," Ilya says. Shane grins at him and they start planning their day out fishing with David. Shane packs snacks and gear while Ilya sends him different iterations of the "women want me, fish fear me" tiktok. Shane ignores all of them.
The next day they pull up to David and Yuna's cottage midmorning. David is already outside packing a tackle box with various lures.
"Hey, boys," he greets them. They spend a few moments talking about the weather and Shane tells his dad about the new rod he had bought. Yuna pops her head out the front door, she's wearing very fancy looking silk pajamas.
"David, where did you put my foot spa," she calls. Ilya looks at Shane, confused. Shane just shrugs. David sighs.
"Come help me," he says quietly to Shane, "I think it's in the hall closet behind the Christmas stuff."
The three of them make their way into the house. Shane and David head for the hallway, leaving Yuna and Ilya standing in the living room. There was a bit of an awkward silence, they hadn't spoken all that much since last summer when they had met. So instead of saying anything, Ilya looks around and sees various chocolates, a bottle of wine, charcuterie board, a face mask kit, and a pedicure set.
Yuna sees him looking at everything and says, "fishing has always been Shane and David's thing. And you couldn't pay me enough to sit on the lake all day so I've always just had myself a little spa day when they go."
Ilya nodded and was instantly jealous. In truth, he did not want to go fishing. He had only agreed for Shane's sake. He didn't want to take him away from his family. He glanced down the hall and then back at the table.
Shane and David reemerged from the hallway then, carrying the foot spa.
"Is that all you need from us," David asked.
"I think so, thank you," Yuna replied.
"Ready to head out," David asked, turning to Shane.
"Yep," he replied, "ready Ilya?"
Ilya dutifully followed them towards the door, but glanced back one more time towards Yuna who was following them to the door.
"Boys," she said as they reached the door, "I think you two need to have some time by yourselves. Just the two of you. How about you leave Ilya here."
Shane looked a little surprised. Ilya tried his very best not to look relieved. He wanted to hug Yuna at that moment for saving him from a day of touching worms.
"Mom, I can't just leave Ilya here," Shane protested.
"What you don't trust me? Think I'll scare him away?"
"Well, no, but what's he going to do all day? If he goes back home he'll just be by himself. I can't make him do that."
"Shane, he doesn't have to go home. He can stay here."
Shane's face scrunched up in that confused look Ilya loved so much, "here?"
Yuna laughed, "yes. Here. He can have a spa day with me."
"I don't think he'd want to do your whole spa day thing, Mom."
"Oh, just because you can't relax enough to enjoy it doesn't mean he can't. Just go. He'll be fine here."
Ilya thought it was amusing how they were talking about him as if he wasn't standing right next to them. Like they were fighting over who got to hang out with him.
"I can stay," Ilya said, speaking for the first time since they arrived. "Is fine. This is for you and your dad. I can stay here, I don't mind."
Shane looked conflicted for a moment but nodded. He fished his car keys out of his pocket and handed them to Ilya, "just in case you wanted to go back home." Yuna rolled her eyes.
Once David and Shane had left, Yuna led Ilya to the couch. Where they chose their respective spots and Yuna explained that she usually watched old movies but if Ilya wanted to watch something else they could. He didn't, so they started with Sixteen Candles. They snacked on the chocolates and charcuterie while Yuna applied Ilya's face mask. She set up her foot spa and they relaxed for a while in silence other than the movie.
They started chatting a little, mostly about hockey and Shane. Ilya asked Yuna what Shane was like as a child and she told him stories of a Shane that used to run off every time they went anywhere.
"I bought a leash! I was too afraid to use it. I thought people would think we were horrible, but he just kept bolting every chance he got," she said while laughing.
Around noon, Yuna opened the wine and put on Dirty Dancing. They kept chatting about nothing in particular and more hockey. Ilya was enjoying talking to her about hockey. He was surprised by her knowledge and understanding, it rivaled Svetlana's.
When Dirty Dancing ended, she put on Steel Magnolias and grabbed another bottle of wine. By the end of it she and Ilya were more than a little Tipsy and both were sniffling messes.
And this was the Yuna and Ilya that Shane and David came back to. The movie had ended, the credits were rolling, and the two of them were sniveling and talking about how unfair it all was.
"Steel Magnolias," David said to Shane solemnly. Shane nodded.
It took some convincing to get Ilya into the car, but eventually he was situated in the passenger's seat. Shane waved goodbye to his parents on their porch and climbed in.
"Did you have fun today," he asked Ilya.
Ilya nodded enthusiastically, "so much fun. We have to do that again next year." Shane just laughed and drove them both home.
This
Some art about coffee and certainly nothing else
I saw a post about Shane and Ilya being sad that they can't thank each other in their acceptance speeches like other can with their spouses and it got me thinking:
Ilya wins his first awards and hes got nobody he really wants to thank after his team and coach cause he he hates his family but he knows his speech is too short so on impulse he goes "And I want to thank Shane Hollander for being slightly worse than me this season". Everyone knows it was going to one of those two, so everyone thinks hes an asshole to say that but whats new so it works for him. But from then on it then becomes a bit for both of them to thank each other in their speeches in a snide way as a reason they won.
Shane winning the Art Ross Trophy (Awarded to the player who leads the league in total points at the end of the regular season). and going "special thanks to Rozanov for missing at least 5 shots this season, he was a huge help"
Ilya winning the Conn Smythe Trophy (Awarded to the most valuable player for his team in the playoffs.) "Just want to give a quick shout out to Hollander for getting knocked out in the second round this season. Must hate to see me up here."
They find a way to mention the other in their speeches every time all the time.
and every time, they sit in their seats like
