just an average everyday corny life @lifeofacorn - Tumblr Blog

mrdsc1010

me: typing into google a bunch of words and phrases to find that specific vine

fbi agent:

zombiebrainsoup

ilikeitmelodic-deactivated20200

Kinky and shy until I die.

block

vampireapologist-archive-deacti

idk if I’ve posted about this before but by far the strangest things that’s happened to me in retail was the time someone’s total came out to my birth-year and I said “hey! that’s the year I was born!” and then the next customer’s total came out to like $12.57 and just bc I’m a weirdo I said “hey! that’s the year I was born!” and without missing a fucking beat this like, 70+ year old man said

“Ah! Another like me! We’re few and far between these days, aren’t we?”

And I was like oh man this guy’s sense of humor really aligns with mine! And I laughed and made some other joke about being immortal and thought that was the end of it,

but this man.

He stood by the register for five more minutes. Maybe more. Which let me tell you is an EXCRUTIATING amount of time for something like this to happen.

And he just kept upping the ante!! He starting talking about some REALLY specific details regarding day-to-day life in the 1300s to the point I started getting worried that I’d misled a genuinely immortal being to believe I am also immortal.

He eventually politely left when I got too busy with other customers to awkwardly respond.

Who the fuck was that guy.

vampireapologist-archive-deacti

I think it’s also important to mention this happened at Cracker Barrel.

waltgifs

dylan-obrien

But she was just a witch, She was just a wish.

autotrophe

Craig Eccles

x

amazing-reality

gxing-in-cxrcles-deactivated201

the worst pain is to make small talk with the person you once told everything.

hastaluegoputas

The worst pain is stepping on your pet’s little feet and knowing that they don’t understand what “I’m sorry” means 😩😩😩😩

sseureki

Nick’s idea notebooks

saltwaterisinmyblood-deactivate

Elephant Rock, Iceland

heathyr

This is an old god, sleeping

thetenderpassion

surprisebitch

fuckheads-revenge

As an update, they’ve moved into a house together and are still super cute

officialwayneenterprises123-dea

Gundam Guy is truly a man of patience and diligence. From his attention to detail building his models to the loving attention and detail for his wife.

What I say: I feel like everyone is mad at me.

What I mean: I got the impression that one specific person is mad at/dissatisfied with/disappointed in me and that feeling has bled over into my perception of literally all other people, because emotionally I cannot grasp the concept that negative feelings or reactions to me are not 100% universal, and as I mostly define myself by what other people think of me I can barely imagine what it feels like to be an individual with free-standing feelings and depth of character separate from what is decided by the judgement of others, thus enforcing the idea that when one person is upset at me then everyone is, because when someone else decides what I am it becomes true.

wetsnail

I spent a year looking for this post.

programmerhumour

Pure savage

positive-memes

Girls can be coders too

millennial-review-deactivated20

aprillikesthings

The USPS is the fastest, cheapest, and most accurate mail service on the planet last I heard, and is the biggest employer of veterans in the entire country.

On top of that, mail carriers: -have wages that top out at over $30 an hour (and their wages go up in predictable steps based on how long they’ve been with the USPS) -have excellent benefits, including a shit-ton of vacation time, plus a pension, and they can retire after thirty years

But they also have one of the oldest, biggest, strongest unions in the country. That must piss off Republicans so much.

Also, side note: they take zero taxpayer dollars. They’re entirely funded by postage.

(”But I heard they were doing terribly!” They’re not. Congress saddled them with pre-funding their retirement 75 years out to intentionally put them in the red and make them look bad. I’m not joking or exaggerating. There’s tons of info, but here’s the USPS’s own info: https://about.usps.com/who-we-are/financials/annual-reports/fy2010/ar2010_4_002.htm )