MASTERLIST Buy me a Kofi! â Infp. slytherin and proud. XXI. F a n f i c. she/ her. The Maze Runner. The Hunger Games. Star Trek. The Umbrella Academy. FATWS. Harry Potter. Marvel. Narnia. I write for all of them.
Hi! Iâve decide to put all my imagines and fics in this masterlist for your comfort. I will update this frequently and yeah, maybe add some request or something ;)
Summary: when Spencer and reader accidentally consume aphrodisiacs, it seems impossible to maintain control of themselves. It all comes down to who will lose their mind first.
warnings: +18, mdni!! alcohol consumption, mentions of weed, unintentional use of aphrodisiacs, explicit descriptions, oral (f receiving) fingering, kissing, porn with plot, p in v, protected sex, no y/n!
It had been just over half an hour since I entered the fraternity building, fully aware that within the first second, Iâd feel the need to leave. Attending any gathering wasnât a regular thing for me. The noise, the crowds, and the multitude of germs everywhere were reason enough to avoid them.
However, that time, I thought, why not? I had never been to one of those university parties and wanted to experience it. However, I never considered the fact that, to enjoy one, you either: a) went with a group of friends or b) drank until you forgot your name and the discomfort you felt about yourself. I didnât have the first option, nor did I want to do the second. So, after a few minutes of reflection, I decided I would walk back to my apartment and go straight to bed.
The place was huge, and since my postgraduate program didnât include the benefit of dormitories, I rarely found myself in places like that. I was about to leave when a hand grabbed my forearm to stop me. In front of me, smiling widely, was her. The moment I saw her, I could swear my face lit up.
âHiâ
âSpencer! I didnât think Iâd see you here.â
Without letting go of my arm, she came closer, wrapping me in a hug and planting a kiss on my cheek before I could react.
I quickly glanced at her, and in the dim light, I noticed her wearing a fitted, spaghetti-strap dress in a deep burgundy red with delicate floral embroidery that looked hand-drawn on the sheer fabric. The material, likely chiffon or tulle, clung to her figure as if custom-made. I tried to focus on her leather jacket instead because the last thing I wanted was to make her uncomfortable by staring too long.
âI was just about to leave, actually.â
âWhy?â she asked, noticing my sigh.
âItâs just... I donât know anyone here.â
âWell, that problem is now solved,â she kindly murmured.
I didnât even get the chance to respond when she had already walked over to another girl, whispering something in her ear, probably to let her know sheâd be away for a while.
Even though I wanted to decline to stay, the truth was that I genuinely enjoyed her company. Rejecting her would have been too rude. We had met some time ago thanks to the advanced classes she took, which overlapped with mine. She was younger than me, of course, but only by one or two years.
She had always been kind to me, attentive, and one could say she was a friend. After all, I trusted her enough to let her hold my hand and guide me through the crowd, despite my aversion to physical contact⌠and people.
âItâd be a crime to let you leave so early after finally coming to a party,â she breathed once we were both seated on a tiny couch where the noise was slightly muffled. At least she had been considerate in that regard.
âI donât even know why I came,â I said, shifting uncomfortably. She was leaning against one side, legs crossed, looking at me with a smile. âI donât like parties.â
âDo you like drinking?â she asked. I shook my head âMaybe thatâs the root of the problem.â
âGetting drunk to the point of losing control isnât my thing,â I replied.
âThatâs not what itâs about,â she murmured almost compassionately âItâs more like⌠fuel for your social battery, you know? You donât have to deal with these people. I donât even know half of them, but the guys in this fraternity are disgustingly rich and just want to get as many girls drunk as possible to sleep with whoever they can. They wonât mind if you drink a little. Enough to have fun, but not so much you end up in some strangerâs bed.â
I thought about it for a second and silently nodded. I didnât want to look like an idiot in front of her by saying I didnât want to drink because, come on, what kind of university student doesnât drink?
âI understand your point, and I donât mean to be a buzzkill, but alcohol has a more complex impact than it seems. Itâs not just something that âfuels your social batteryâ; itâs a central nervous system depressant, which means it slows down brain and motor functions. That initial feeling of euphoria or relaxation happens because it inhibits the prefrontal cortexâthe part of your brain that regulates judgment and self-awareness. So, technically, drinking a little might make you feel more uninhibited or confident, but it can also impair your ability to make rational decisions if you overdo it, even if you donât notice right away.â
I paused, gauging how much more I should say before losing her interest. Hearing no objections, I continued:
âAdditionally, strong liquors, which have high ethanol concentrations, can hit your system faster than diluted drinks. And if you drink too quickly, you could easily exceed your liverâs ability to metabolize the alcohol. The excess ethanol stays in your bloodstream, raising your blood alcohol levels and increasing the risk of intoxication.â
I avoided looking directly at her, partly because I didnât want to get distracted by her gaze and partly because I was nervous around her.
âItâs not that I want to ruin your fun, but if youâre going to drink, you should do it slowly, alternating with water, and never on an empty stomach. Not to seem smarter than everyone else, but because staying in control can be the difference between a fun night and a situation you donât want to be in.â
I expected her to look bored, confused, or even indifferent, assuming sheâd left halfway through my rambling. But when I looked at her, I was surprised by the admiration shining in her eyes, accompanied by an amused smile.
âAll right, genius boy, if you know all that and basically have the perfect recipe for not making stupid mistakes while drinking, why do you still refuse?â she teased playfully. I didnât know what to say, but luckily, she answered for me âListen, I drove here. How about we make a deal? We can drink a little, have a good time, maybe dance if you want, and if either of us starts doing something embarrassing, the soberest one will make sure to drag the other to the car and drive them home. Deal?â
She handed me her car keys, and I wasnât sure if the brush of her hand against mine was intentional or if she had decided to linger a little longer.
I agreed to her proposal, and a second later, she was already off her seat, walking toward where I assumed the kitchen was. No one noticed us entering, too absorbed in their own business to care if we were strangers.
There was every type of alcohol scattered around, and she took the liberty of pouring me a shot of a clear liquid, which I guessed was vodka. She warned me to drink it in one gulp, and when the warmth hit my throat, I barely managed to avoid coughing. If she noticed, she didnât say anything.
âTastes like⌠strawberry.â
âItâs good, right?â she laughed, giving my shoulder a playful nudge.
Our previous seat was already taken, so she opted for us to stand in a quiet corner. I have to admit that, although I still felt slightly awkward, the vodka was having the desired effect; making me feel more animated to talk.
Talking to her was almost hypnotic. Maybe it was the rhythmic movement of her lips, still stained with traces of what had once been red lipstick, or perhaps it was her tone, but it made me feel like I had to watch her. She never faltered when she spoke, always exuding confidence and calm, no matter the topic.
On the other hand, whenever I responded, I completely lost focus. No matter what I said, she kept looking at me with a wide smile, nodding, and even leaning closer when something made her laugh. But her laugh wasnât mockingâno, it was as if she genuinely found my intellectual jokes or nonsensical remarks funny.
Gradually, my glass emptied, and she guided me back to the kitchen, serving us moderately but consistently. After an hour, all my nerves had vanished, leaving only a normal guy enjoying the terrible background music, unconcerned about how dirty the place was, and utterly captivated by the woman next to him.
âItâs strange, you know? I didnât think Iâd enjoy something like this. Parties always seemed so⌠chaotic,â
She looked around with a slight smile.
âThatâs true. Theyâre not exactly calm, but in a way, the chaos has its charm. It lets you leave everything else behind for a while.â
âI suppose youâre right. Sometimes, you just need to disconnect.â
âYou seem less tense now, huh? Are you sure itâs not the vodka helping with that?â
She moved closer, almost leaning against my chest in a friendly way, and seeing her looking up at me made my face feel hot.
âMaybe. But itâs also largely due to the company.â
She seemed surprised by my sudden boldness and let out a laugh that I interpreted as a sign of approval. We continued drinking, laughing, and soon my stomach demanded food. Even in my slightly tipsy state, I still remembered that eating would help lessen the effects of the alcohol.
I have to admit that the way I held her waist to guide her to the kitchen was entirely intentional. However, she didnât seem bothered by the contact. By this point, Iâd realized that no one really cared about what we took or didnât take, so we felt free to rummage through the pantry.
âThere are chips, pretzels, Cheetos, some cookies...â she began listing, handing me each package she found.
I grabbed a stray cookie, and suddenly, she let out a sigh of admiration.
âWhat is it?â
âChocolate,â she murmured happily. It was a half-eaten, luxurious-looking golden package with no label âDo you want some?â
âI donât think itâs a good idea. Chocolate has properties that can slightly boost energy and mood. Both alcohol and chocolate can be hard for the body to handle, especially with a combination of high sugar and alcohol content. This can lead to stomach discomfort, dizziness, or a stronger hangover the next day.â
But she wasnât listening. She had already popped a sizeable piece of chocolate into her mouth. Immediately, she offered me a piece, slightly bigger than hers.
âYou have to try it,â she moaned.
I resisted, but I have to admit that the fact she grabbed my shirt and pulled me closer caught me off guard enough to let her slip the chocolate into my mouth.
âHey!â
âYouâll thank me later.â
It was delicious, thatâs for sure. Like a pair of sneaky raccoons, we kept scavenging for snacks in the kitchen until we were satisfied. She grabbed a bag of chips, and I took the bag of pretzels.
After our little break, she poured us another round of drinks, and something inside me told me it was time to stop. I decided that would be my last glass for the night.
Letâs dance she suddenly whispered, and once again, I let her lead me toward the crowd.
I didnât know how to dance; I think that was pretty obvious. But the situation managed to make me forget that fact.
She was patient with me and laughed every time I made a mistake. Even though there was smoke around me, probably from weed, that didn't stop me from staring intently, and even somewhat intimidated, at my friend. Beautiful, statuesque, and drunk friend.
We danced for a long time until something in her swaying movements, in the way she smiled at me, began to make my head spin. It was as if the atmosphere was charged with something moreâsomething I couldnât identify at first.
She leaned closer, and my pulse began to quicken slightly. Her hands rose to tangle in my neck, bringing a warm sensation that followed: my thoughts seemed clearer, sharper. I wondered if it was the alcohol, but then something different began to course through my skin.
The warmth intensified, not just in my body but in my mind as well. I felt more alert, more awake, yet the calmness of the vodka lingered, balancing the sensation. My skin felt more sensitive, as if every little touch sent vibrations through me in a more intense way.
My eyes focused more on her movements, her voice, and the way the air filled with her perfume. I wanted to get closer, as if there were an invisible force pulling me toward her. And though my body responded with a soft yearning, my mind remained present, conscious of every second.
By the way she was looking at me, I imagined I wasnât the only one experiencing these kinds of emotions.
âSweetheart.â
âHmm?â
âCan we sit down for a moment? Iâm completely sweaty, and the smell of weed is starting to bother me.â
âOf course.â
My hands rested on her waist, unsure of where else to go, and we stumbled out of the crowd, finding a couch to collapse onto.
I was sweaty too, and we were both breathing heavily. When I saw her lean her head back against the seat, leaving her neck exposed, something stirred inside me.
âYou move well, Reid.â
âDonât lie.â
âI mean it. You just need a little confidence,â she smiled. Perhaps the alcohol dulled her sense of personal space, which is why she leaned so close to me. âYouâre so smart that, with a bit of practice, youâd be the most skilled at a lot of physical activities.â
Did she know how nervous she was making me? My face was already flushed from the alcohol, the effort, and now from the way she was looking at me while twirling a strand of her hair around her finger.
I wanted to say something else, but a voice interrupted mine: a tall, burly guy accompanied by two others who seemed to be flanking him. Probably a member of the fraternity hosting the party.
He specifically addressed her, asking how she was enjoying the party and throwing in a compliment, clearly with ulterior motives. For a moment, I felt disheartened. Of course, she could have gone with him and I would have understood. I was far too used to rejection.
âIâm having a great timeâwith my friend. Thanks,â she exclaimed, cordial but curt.
âWant a drink?â
âHonestly, no.â
By the uncomfortable smile she gave the men, I assumed she was politely ending the conversation. With some reluctance, the guys walked away.
Suddenly, my breath caught when I felt her hand rest on my thigh, sliding painfully slowly down to my knee. I couldnât even hear her words over the heat of her fingers on my pants.
âSorry?â
âI thought you were going to say something, earlier.â
âNo,â I quickly replied, smiling like an idiot because of the way she had leaned toward me. âNothing.â
âI like listening to you. You know so many things, and you donât make me feel dumb when you explain them. Thatâs very sexy.â
âSexy?â
âYeah,â she smiled, because Iâd replied in a voice an octave higher than normal. âYou are very sexy.â
Her compliment was followed by a soft, distracted kiss on the line of my jaw, which sent my brain into overdrive.
âUhm⌠you⌠youâre beautiful. Very beautiful.â
My clumsy compliment seemed to please her, and I felt one of her nails, long and painted black, tracing circles on the skin of my knee. Each small movement felt deliberate, as if she knew exactly what she was doing.
âDid you know fireflies donât just glow to communicate but also to⌠attract?â
Her voice broke the silence between us, soft but layered with a double meaning that made me lift my eyes to her.
âYes, I know,â I responded automatically, my brain switching to autopilot. âBioluminescent signals are a form of courtship. The light patterns vary by species and can be very specific.â
She turned her head toward me, her lips curving into a lazy smile.
âOf course youâd know that. But tell me somethingâdo you think it actually works? Making someone notice you just by glowing?â
My throat went dry. There was something about the way she was looking at me, like she was expecting a more personal answer than a scientific one.
âI guess it depends on who youâre trying to attract,â I murmured, feeling ridiculously exposed under her gaze.
âThat makes sense.â
Her hand slid slightlyâbarely noticeableâtoward the edge of my knee. After tapping her fingers on my pants, she withdrew it.
She didnât move from the couch, and neither did I. There was something about her posture that held me captiveâthe way she leaned back against the seat, relaxed yet naturally elegant. Her dress had ridden up slightly along her thighs, revealing more skin than I felt prepared to handle at that moment. I tried to look elsewhere, but it was as if my eyes had a will of their own, always returning to the same place.
âAre you okay?â she asked, her voice soft but laced with a hint of amusement.
âYes, of course,â I replied quickly, turning my head in the other direction. Perhaps too quickly, because my neck cracked slightly in the process.
She didnât say anything, but her suppressed laughter made me feel even more awkward. In the silence that followed, I forced myself to focus on something safer: the empty glass on the table, the flickering lights through the window, anything but the curve of her leg or the rise and fall of her chest as she breathed.
âItâs hot, isnât it?â she commented suddenly, with almost theatrical casualness. Then, without warning, she leaned forward as if to adjust her shoe, causing the neckline of her dress to dip even further.
âDo you think so?â I muttered, my voice raspier than I intended.
She smiled, a gesture somewhere between innocence and knowing.
âYes, definitely. Though maybe itâs because weâre sitting so close,â she said, glancing around as if she had only just noticed the temperature.
Her words felt like both a slap and a caress at the same time. I tried to keep my gaze fixed on her face, but it didnât help that her eyes shone with a kind of mischievous intent. Then she lifted one leg, bending it to get more comfortable on the couch, and her knee accidentally brushed against my thigh.
âDid you know you have a very particular way of distracting yourself?â she remarked while toying with the hem of her dress, as if unaware of the chaos she was causing in my head.
âDo I?â my voice sounded weak, almost a whisper.
She nodded slowly, leaning in a bit closer until I could feel the warmth of her proximity.
âYes. Itâs like youâre trying to avoid something but⌠you canât.â
My throat went dry. I wanted to say something clever, to steer the conversation away, anything to regain some ground. But instead, all that came out was a nervous, forced laugh.
She didnât stop looking at me. Then, with exasperating slowness, she smoothed the fabric of her dress over her thighâa casual gesture.
âYou know, sometimes you seem so self-aware. Itâs something that can be endearing, but also⌠well, how do I put it?â she paused for a moment, bringing a finger to her lips as if she were reflecting. âIt makes you seem easier to impress.â
âWhat do you mean?â
âItâs nothing, Reid. Itâs just me ramblingâ her voice softened, and I felt the lightest touch on my nose as her finger grazed it. I tried to ignore the fact that her gaze had lingered on my lips âScattered thoughts I have in my head.â
Without warning, she let out a loud exhale and leaned back into the couch, arching her back as if trying to relieve some muscle tension. I know she probably wasnât aware of the movement, but it was what finally made me lose the little composure I had left.
âI need to use the restroom. Can you give me a moment?â
I escaped. Cowardly, completely, I got up and practically bolted toward the bathroom, desperate for a moment of peace. As soon as I entered, I realized I had an obvious problem in my pantsâI was hard as a rock, and that wasnât good. I looked at myself in the mirror, surprised at how flushed my face was. My pupils were dilated, my lips dry⌠What the hell was happening to me?
It quickly became clear that she was the reason for my situation.
The alcohol prevented me from feeling the embarrassment I surely deserved, and instead, I felt like my head was spinning. I placed a hand over the fabric of my pants, letting out a frustrated, pained groan.
I stayed there for a while, trying to think of something that would make my erection go away, but nothing worked. A couple of knocks on the door startled me, and that forced me to leave. Once in the hallway, I walked for a bit until I bumped into someone.
âSpencer! Iâve been looking for you. Are you okay?â
âNo! I mean, yes⌠itâs justâŚâ
I needed to think of something quicklyâsomething believable, but not catastrophic. However, it was hard to concentrate with her body so close to mine, mere inches away from her noticing my situation.
âDid you throw up?â
âNo, no, itâs not that. Itâs nothing. I think the vodka didnât sit well with me, uh, maybe I got dizzy from dancing, I donât know. I think itâs best if I leave.â
âPoor thing,â she murmured, pouting âIâll take you home right now.â
âI can take a cab.â
âNonsense. That was our agreement, remember? If one of us was in bad shape, the other would take care of them. Plus, I was the one who encouraged you to drink. Iâd feel bad if something happened to you.â
She was already putting on her jacketâsheâd been holding it, probably suspecting the situationâand tried to find the keys in her pocket. My outstretched hand reminded her that sheâd already given them to me earlier.
When she placed her hand on the small of my back to guide me out, my breathing deepened. The sensation of excitement coursed through me in a way I couldnât ignore. I realized that something in me desperately wanted her. Too much.
It wasnât an impulsive desire but a subtle one that had been building throughout the nightâwith every glance, every gesture. Perhaps the vodka had intensified my evident attraction to her, but whatever the reason, it had turned into something far more palpable.
It was almost as if my body was begging me to stop her right then and there, to kiss her recklessly, and maybe, just maybe, ease the relentless ache inside me.
The cool night air made me feel better, and as the noise faded behind us, I began to calm down. I fervently tried to hide the bulge in my pants, but the truth was she didnât even seem to notice. Then again, it wouldâve been strange to catch her staring at my crotch, right?
âAre you sure youâre in a condition to drive?â
âIâve driven home in far worse states of drunkenness. Donât worry,â she smiled.
She looked more lucid now, as if her intoxication had vanished in an instant. I decided to trust her abilities.
The drive home was silent, and I kept shifting in my seat, trying to find strategic positions to avoid embarrassment. I guess she attributed my silence to the supposed discomfort I was feeling, as she didnât try to start a conversation.
She didnât say anything when she caught me looking at her through the rearview mirror. It was an innocent glance, at least on my part, simply admiring her. Her lips were driving me crazy, her eyes, slightly narrowed from the lack of light and smudged with mascara, seemed the most beautiful to me. I didnât know what she saw in me, but I thinkâno, I feelâthat it was something she liked.
âThank you so much for bringing me home⌠and for everything.â
âDid you have fun?â
âQuite a lot, actually.â
âWe should do this more often.â
âGo to university parties?â
âJust go out in general. To a bar, grab some drinks, a coffee, the library if youâd prefer,â she laughed âThe place doesnât matter. What matters is that youâre there.â
Was she implying she wanted a date with me? I swallowed hard and looked at her, trying to decipher what she wanted me to do. I couldnât figure it out.
âIâd like that, yes. We can talk about that later. Thanks again for the ride.â
A kiss on my cheek marked her goodbye, and I rushed out, eager to get inside my apartment. I was about to unlock the buildingâs door when the sound of a car horn made me turn around.
âHey, would you mind if I use your bathroom? Iâll be quick,â she promised.
I needed to get to the shower and turn on the cold water, but I didnât protest when she turned off the car engine.
Almost no one visited me in the apartment, so I kept the space however I pleased. It wasnât really messy, but there were plenty of things on the desk and several books scattered around.
She entered, as she had said, rushing to the bathroom. It was only then that I dared to put a hand over my pants, swallowing a moan that was about to escape from my throat.
In my limited sexual experiences, nothing like this had ever happened to me, and I wondered what the cause might have been. Alcohol couldnât be blamed, of course, but it was responsible for ruining my ability to react enough to find another explanation.
The shirt began to feel heavy on me, and almost out of necessity, I undid the first buttons to let myself breathe. I tried to ventilate my skin by tugging at the fabric with the tips of my fingers, but it was useless. I sighed.
I glanced around the room, just wanting to make sure nothing was embarrassing in view, and at that moment, she came out of the bathroom. She looked flushed and had some wet hair, as if she had washed her face.
âYou okay?â
âYes, just⌠suddenly felt a bit feverishâ
âLet me checkâ
My intentions were purely medical when I cupped her face with one hand, putting the back of the other against her forehead to confirm or deny my suspicions. Of course, I hadnât considered how close we would be. Or maybe I had, subconsciously, and thatâs why I moved forward.
My choice of words wasn't the best either.
âYouâre hot,â
âI donât think itâs as much as you.â
A daring smile slid across her lips, and I held my breath as her fingers traced up to the line of my collarbone, exposed by my shirt.
âWhy are you saying that?â
âDonât you like it?â
âItâs just⌠I donât understand it.â
A soft laugh echoed in my ears.
âWell, I think youâre very handsome. Would there be any other reason for that?â
I swallowed deeply. She noticed the movement of my Adamâs apple.
âNo⌠I think⌠I think not. Itâs the most logical thing.â
âDonât they tell you that often?â she murmured, genuinely confused. I shook my head âThatâs a shame.â
Her hand, which had been tentatively caressing my skin, moved up to my neck and pulled me just a few inches closer to her.
âHey, Spencer.â
âYes?â
âCould I kiss you?â
A chill ran down my spine. And without thinking, I answered yes.
Her mouth found mine with a softness that contrasted with the whirlwind of sensations inside me. It was a heady contrast: the sweetness of her lips against the intensity of the desire that had been building up in every fiber of my being.
My hands instinctively moved to her waist, hesitating for a moment, as if fearing that this might just be a product of my imagination. But she didnât hesitate. Her body leaned into me, closing any distance that remained.
Her lips were insistent, demanding, and before I could process what was happening, her hand slid down to my chest, pushing me gently back until my back collided with the wall.
âIâm sorryâŚâ I managed to murmur between kisses, pulling my face slightly away. My voice came out more trembly than I wanted.
She raised an eyebrow, tilting her face toward mine, her fingers now brushing my jawline.
âWhy are you apologizing?â
âFor thisâ my gaze dropped quickly before returning to her eyes. âNo⌠I didnât want you to feel it. Itâs embarrassing.â
For a moment, I thought she would pull away, that the spell of the moment would break. But instead, her lips curved into a mischievous smile.
âEmbarrassing? I thought I was the only one feeling all this tension,â her tone was low, almost a whisper, but filled with a certainty that made my breath grow even more erratic.
Before I could respond, her lips captured mine again, this time with more intensity. The kiss was everything I didnât know I needed: desperate, intoxicating, completely consumed by the connection between us. I felt her body press against mine, her curves fitting perfectly as if they were made to be there. And then, all my doubts, all my attempts to hold back, vanished.
My mind was a whirlwind. Every touch of her lips, every time her tongue sought mine, was like a fire I couldnât put out. My face was hot, yes, but now not because of the alcohol, not even from the effort of holding myself back. It was her closeness, her touch, her condescending voice still echoing in my head.
She knows what sheâs doing. And sheâs slowly killing me.
âHey, waitâŚâ
âWhatâs wrong?â
âDo you feel okay with this?â
âA lot. Do you want to stop?â
âNo. Itâs just that⌠youâve been drinking. I donât want you to think I took advantage of youâ my voice came out hoarse, full of doubt and repressed desire.
Her eyes met mine, firm and warm at the same time, as if her gaze could completely disarm me.
âRelax. Youâve been drinking too, pretty, and I think if anyone could make that accusation, it would be you. Do you feel like Iâm taking advantage of you?â
âNoâ
âIâm fully aware of everything. I donât even feel drunk anymore. The only thing thatâs making me dizzy right now is you, SpencerâŚâ
I shivered when I heard my name on her lips like that. She continued:
âIâm just as anxious as you are. Iâve been holding back all night, trying not to make this too obvious, but I canât anymore. Please, donât doubt me. Donât doubt what I want. I want youâ
Her confession hit my heart like a blow and ignited a spark that set my entire body on fire. My hand moved up her back until it tangled in her hair, while the other rested on her hip. The pull was gentle but enough for her to understand that my inner struggle had ended. I wasnât resisting this anymore.
I wanted her too. I wanted her now.
âI never imaginedâŚâ
My words were barely audible as our lips brushed in a kiss that was both an explosion of emotions and a long-awaited relief. Her mouth was soft, and so perfectly synchronized with mine that I felt like the world stopped at that moment.
Her hands gripped my shoulders, anchoring the connection between us, while my thumb traced a slow path along her jawline, savoring every detail of her skin. It was more than a kiss. It was the confirmation of something that had been lingering all evening.
When we parted just a centimeter to breathe, our foreheads stayed pressed together.
âDid that clear your doubts?â
âYou have no idea how relieved I am to hear you say all that,â I replied with a weak smile, the only one my pounding heart allowed me to form.
âThen stop overthinkingâ
The space between us disappeared again as we kissed with desperation we had both been suppressing. Her low laugh vibrated against my lips, and I couldnât help but smile. How did she do it? How did she drive me crazy with so little effort?
But now wasnât the time for questions. It was time to feel.
The whole world had reduced itself to him: his warm breath, his lips that wavered between soft and desperate, and the hands that roamed my waist with a mix of reverence and clumsiness, making me want him even more. Spencer had always been an enigma to me, a balance between restraint and passion that I didn't know how to decipher... until now.
I had waited for this moment more than I would ever admit. Maybe it had been the way he looked at me when he thought I didn't notice, or the warmth in his voice when he said my name, as if it were something sacred. But now, with his body pressed against mine and his doubts finally gone, I knew I hadn't imagined anything.
It was as if the pieces of a puzzle I had been trying to put together in the dark finally clicked into place, and the resulting image was more beautiful than I had ever dreamed.
Wanting to reverse the roles, it was now him who gently pushed me against the wall, and I felt the control he always seemed to have begin to crack. His breath was heavy, his body trembling slightly, a sign that this was as new and overwhelming for him as it was for me.
"Spencer..." I murmured his name again, feeling it resonate in my chest at the same time his lips moved more intensely against mine. "Can I ask you something?"
I received an affirmative exhalation, and to let me speak, his lips moved to the hollow of my neck. Although my mouth was free, the soft and wet kisses I was receiving blurred my judgment a bit.
"Tell meâ
"Did you really feel bad at the party? Or was it just..."
"I didn't want you to notice what you were doing to me. Although I think at this point it doesn't matter much, right?"
Contrary to what I expected, Spencer pushed his hips against mine, as if he wanted to prove that it was true. I could even call it a claim, something that said: look what you did to me. And I wanted him to know just how much my body was begging for him.
Carefully, I moved one of his hands from my waist, and before he could protest, I guided it to one of my thighs, dangerously close to my core. I was glad I had thought of lingerie as a great complement to my dress, maybe in an attempt to feel sexy even if no one saw it. But now, he was going to see it.
Spencer understood my silent request. Those long, slender fingers, which seemed made for more than just flipping through the pages of a book or scribbling frantic notes on paper, slid across my smooth skin. I sighed as I remembered the veins tracing a map under his fair skin, like rivers of contained energy.
Until they finally reached where I needed them. And his touch... God, his touch was something else. They were hands made for discovery, for holding, for exploring, but in those moments, they seemed to be made only for me.
Spencer wasn't an overly bold guy, so it didn't surprise me that he just traced shapes above my panties, as if he wanted to diagnose my anatomy before making any move. My sighs at his ear seemed to please him.
Suddenly, he stopped kissing me, and I huffed, since I liked the attention he was giving my shoulder, until I felt his lips drop just slightly. A loud, pathetic moan escaped me when he squeezed my tits while burying his face to leave an experimental kiss.
I was barely processing that when he knelt in front of me and, carefully, took the edge of my dress and lifted it.
My legs trembled with anticipation at the thought of what he was going to do next, and then I felt his lips brush my thigh. He started gentle, kind, but soon he began sucking every bit of skin he could, and in the end, he made sure to leave bites strong enough to make me whimper.
Who would have thought that this man, seemingly so inexperienced, turned out to offer the best foreplay a woman could desire?
I squealed as I felt his kisses trail down to the fabric of my panties, pausing for a moment to lick the length of my still-clothed pussy.
âYouâre dripping wet,â he observed. I was too focused on not giving in right then and there to say anything "Is oral something you're into?"
âI donât know,â I exclaimed honestly. I didnât care how vulnerable I looked as I confessed that no man had ever dared to give me head âYou?â
âItâs an idea that piques my curiosity, yes.â
Gently he slid some of the fabric aside to clear the way for his tongue, and I felt as if my entire body was only aware of the parts he was probing, kissing, sucking. When he raised my thigh to shoulder height, deepening his thrusts, I felt like I was going to pass out.
I lowered my hand to his thick head and tried, in vain, to push him away from me. I honestly didnât have the strength or desire to do so, much less when he had picked up the pace.
I moaned a sweet nickname out loud and then Spencer pulled away, looking up at me with glossy, swollen lips.
âTake me to bed, please.â
He didnât need me to say it twice as he immediately stood up and took me by the waist to guide me to said spot. I was able to taste myself on his lips and for some reason that only turned me on.
Once we hit the mattress the way he laid me down was gentle and I sighed at that. How could he be so sweet all the time? I wondered. And worse yet, how much would this little adventure affect my future expectations?
Because if it was about standards, I was finding out that Spencer Reid was the standard.
Seemingly more enthralled now by my lips than my pussy, he continued with the make-out session we were having. With each touch we had, my excitement was increasing more and more. In the midst of it all I managed to unbutton his shirt and take it off to leave it somewhere on the bed; the semi-darkness of the room shielded any insecurities he might be feeling, as well as my own.
âYou are painfully stunning, did you know?â
My tone was one of reproach, and he laughed at that, looking down almost embarrassed. Maybe he wasn't used to compliments, but something told me he was definitely enjoying it.
I heard him murmur something under his breath about me, while he took down the straps of my dress. My hands almost instinctively went to unbuckle his belt, and before I could do anything, he pulled away from me. Needless to say, this left me confused.
"Sorry, I..."
âYou don't want to?â I murmured understandingly. I thought maybe he wasn't a big fan of these situations, and I understood, but somehow I felt hurt.
"No! Sure I want to. I want it a lot, but..." he tried not to look at me, as if avoiding confrontation "It's just that I don't have any protection hereâ
A laugh escaped my lips, and I feared he might interpret it as mockery, so I stretched my neck to steal another kiss.
"One would think there are many girls who pass through these sheets."
"Don't make fun of me."
"I'm not making fun of you. It's cute, actually. It even makes me feel guilty," I murmured, smiling "For a second, I was afraid something had made you uncomfortable."
"No, it's not that."
I hesitated for a second whether I should suggest what was on my mind.
"We could do it like this. It doesn't bother me."
"It's not just about avoiding an unwanted pregnancy..." he began. At that moment, I saw him return to his usual nerdy mode. "Although, of course, that counts. But there are things like sexually transmitted infections, some of which don't even show symptoms at first and could complicate things if not detected on time. I know this doesn't sound very attractive, but believe me, protection isn't just for avoiding future problems; it's also to take care of you now, so you don't have issues later: because sometimes men can transmit diseases we're asymptomatic for, and to be honest, I've never done those kinds of tests. A lot of people don't think about it, but the risks are real. And don't get me wrong, I trust you, but even though you trust me, diseases don't discriminate. And I'd like us both to have that peace of mind. Prevention is never too much."
âYou conflict me deeply. On the one hand, I admire how responsible you are; it's very cute. But on the other hand, I just urgently need you to fuck me deep and cum inside meâ
Spencer was surprised by my desperate whining and tensed when I placed one of my legs around his waist, trying to persuade him. But I was even more surprised when I felt him pull completely away to stand beside the bed.
"Where are you going?"
"To the pharmacy," he announced, putting a jacket over his bare torso.
"Are you serious?" I laughed widely, sitting on the bed now that my companion had moved away.
"Definitely. I feel like I can't handle it any longer, itâs physically painful, and when you talk to me like that, it just drives me crazyâ he groaned, joining in the fun. It was the first time something like this happened, and I honestly thought it was absolutely hilarious âI'll be back in a minute, I swear! Please, don't go...â
"I couldn't," I murmured sweetly. He came closer, and I took the opportunity to kiss him again "Be quick. I'll be waiting anxiously for you."
Something in my tone of voice affected the man, or maybe it was the wink I gave him, but I saw him bolt out the door. I flopped back onto the bed, taking a moment to digest what was happening.
I have to admit that my classmate had always been attractive to me, but I never thought he could feel the same way. Not even in my wildest dreams did I imagine that I would be waiting for him in his bed so that, with any luck, he could ravish me without holding back.
As I reached out my arms, I could feel the fabric of the shirt I had previously removed from him, and then I brought it up to my nose, inhaling without thinking. A familiar scent hit me immediately: the mix of sweet cocktails he had drank during the party and a subtle trace of cannabis, as if the night was still impregnated in him. I could distinguish a hint of wood, perhaps from the furniture in the place, combined with a light scent of sweat that was not bothersome, but rather natural. And then, among all that, there was his perfume: a citrus and spicy aroma that evoked something fresh, but also deep, sensual, as if every molecule of his being was waiting for something more. I breathed harder, feeling that this aroma, this moment, defined him.
I didn't know why that particular night my whole body was screaming for his closeness. I was crazy about him and it wasn't the alcohol's fault, because I'd had too many drinks to know. Neither of us had ever done drugs and for a moment I was terrified by the idea that I could want to be with someone like that, with such fervor that it was worrying.
Still dizzy from the excitement of the moment, I lowered one of my hands to my crotch to get rid of my panties. I thought about him, wondering how skilled he was. Not that I doubted his abilities, but just like Iâd told him that night, he might need some practice.
I started to fantasize about helping him through this situation, maybe guiding him or pampering him by just asking him to lay back so I could do all the work. Spencer was the kind of man who invited you to please him, the kind of man you wanted to satisfy because he never pressured you into it.
Playing with myself, I sniffed his shirt again, desperately wishing I could have the source of said scent with me, until my brain was filled only with daydreams in which he was the protagonist and my fingers were replaced by his. That's why I didn't notice when he opened the apartment. And that's why I didn't know he was watching me from the door frame until I heard him let out a ragged sigh.
Being caught in that position made me feel embarrassed at first, but the way he practically lunged at me and kissed me more decisively than before, I figured he liked seeing me like that.
"Busy?"
I was caught off guard by his sassiness and I knew he was proud of it by the smile I felt on my neck.
âI guess you found what we need, right?â
âUh-huhâ
âHave you read any books on female anatomy?â
âQuite a fewâ
âSo I guess you know a lot about sexuality, donât you?â
âIn theory, yes. Unfortunately, I havenât had many opportunities to put it into practice.â
A smile spread across my face, which luckily he couldn't see because he was too busy leaving a trail of kisses along the top of my torso.
âHow unfortunate, considering youâre a scientist. I wouldnât mind becoming an object of your study, though, you know?â
He subtly slid the straps of my dress and revealed my bra, from which a considerable part of my boobs protruded, which he happily kissed.
At the same time his hand came down to caress me, making me shiver with anticipation, resting on just the right spots. It was the least I could expect from such an intellectual man, one who definitely knew about the thousands of nerve endings concentrated in my clitoris, which he was definitely tapping into to satisfy me.
âMay I?â he whispered, looking at the little underwear he still had on.
I nodded immediately and arched my back to make it easier for him to unbutton it, which didn't take too long. He was practically worshipping every inch of my skin, which, combined with his gentle yet firm fingers rubbing me, was driving me crazy.
We both moaned in unison as he pushed a finger into me. It felt just as good as I had imagined.
I had read somewhere that, physiologically, women need more time to achieve an orgasm and although none of my exes had cared about that, this one seemed to know that fact. Maybe that was why he was giving me such attention, which I was undoubtedly grateful for.
âHoneyâŚâ I choked out âyouâre doing great, really, really good, but would you mind if we replaced those fingers? I want to feel you inside me,â I practically begged.
I never begged, I felt like a fool doing it, but if that got me the intensity of the kiss he gave me, I wouldn't mind starting to do it.
Spencer pulled away from me, searching for the packet of condoms he'd run off to get, and while he unbuttoned his pants I got rid of my dress, which by this point was just a mass of fabric around my waist.
My body wasn't perfect, but I figured that wouldn't matter to him. Besides, I doubt he'd be rude enough to mention it.
âNeed a hand?â I joked playfully, noticing that he was struggling to open the silver package.
âIâm sorry, Iâm just a little nervous,â he said to himself, hoping I wouldnât mind too much.
I wanted to reward him for treating me so well a few moments ago and I took the package from his hands, placing my palm on his chest until I laid him down against the mattress. Once in that position it wasn't difficult to get rid of the wrapping to place the piece of latex on him, thinking that I didn't have a single complaint about his body.
My hands on him made him nervous and I watched him turn into a mess as I began pumping his cock up and down to make sure he had the condom on properly.
âYou donât have to hold back. I like the sounds you make,â I exclaimed in a velvety tone, trying to sound as genuine as possible âThat way I know youâre enjoying it.â
âI donât think Iâll be able to hold out for much longer,â he confessed, as my hand continued to move along his length. Although I wished I could take better care of him, I understood the situation.
âYour wish is my commandâ
He didn't complain when I put each leg on his sides and he bravely hardened as I teased him for a moment before sinking my pussy onto his dick. I started slow, trying to make him last as long as possible, but with each second it was getting harder to keep up a pace.
I tried my best to ride him, trying to give him the best experience as a thank you for all his hospitality. And from the whimpers coming out of his throat I assume I was doing my job well.
At some point his hands ended up on my hips, guiding me as he pleased. Sometimes he pushed me down, as if he wanted to get to the bottom of me, and other times he manipulated me so that the thrusts were fast.
He wasn't lying when he said he would cum in no time, as the repressed desire added to the previous sexual actions had him on the edge of the abyss. I knew he had reached orgasm when he closed his eyes and his hips slammed against me, in erratic movements.
I kept riding him a little longer, chasing my own climax, and when I got it I put my hands against his chest, arching in pleasure. Spencer, breathing heavily, grabbed my wrists in his hands and then pulled me so that I was against his torso, my lips too close to his.
He placed his palm on my cheek and pulled me in his direction, seemingly asking for a kiss. I granted it.
âAre you satisfied?â
âI am,â I sighed wryly. It was cute that he didnât know that sometimes girls donât even make it. âHow was it for you?â
âI'm speechless.â
I laughed and, to a certain extent, felt flattered that I had left a man who knew a million ways to express himself in that state.
We enjoyed the high we had just had for a few minutes and waited for our breathing to slow down; when our sighs took the same rhythm, he spoke again.
âYou should go to the bathroom. Itâs, uh⌠healthy for you to do it after every encounter.â
I reached for the garment he had been wearing and, trying to protect myself from the cold air, I put it on over myself.
âDo you mind lending it to me?â
âNu-huh,â he hummed, eyeing me as if I were a cupcake. I would later learn how affected he was to see me using his clothes to slide out of bed.
When I came out of the bathroom he already had his boxers on, probably wanting to maintain modesty, and when he went to attend to his needs I also looked for my panties. It wasn't long before he returned to keep me company.
âDo you want to cuddle? Iâd feel like a whore if I just leftâ
âYes, of course I wantâ
He made sure to throw anything that was on the bed onto the floor and patted the pillows to make them more comfortable. I settled into the space next to him, leaning against his chest, right at heart level.
One of his arms was holding me from behind and in some strange way that made me feel safe; protected.
âYour feet are frozen, are you cold?â
"Not much"
âDo you want me to get you some socks?â
âIâm fine, Spencer,â I laughed softly. I brushed my cheek against his skin and tried to snuggle closer to him. âItâll just get colder if you leave.â
âDid you know that the human body is incredibly efficient at maintaining its temperature? When two bodies are nearby, like⌠now,â he paused, settling a little closer to me, âheat transfer occurs due to thermal radiation and direct conduction. Essentially, each body generates heat that helps the other maintain a stable core temperature.â
âSo youâre like a human blanketâ
âThatâs right. In fact, in situations of severe hypothermia, sharing body heat in this way can literally save lives.â
I raised my head to look at him and noticed an excited gleam in his eyes, the one he always had when he shared something from his vast knowledge.
âIâve been thinking quite a bit about what you said earlier, about female anatomy,â seeing him frown, I continued, âNo field of study considers one experimentation enough, right? Everything needs to be replicated two, three, four times. Ten times if necessary.â
âYour guess is quite accurate.â
âSay no more. We must give everything if it is in the name of scienceâ
From the smile on his face, I knew that my joke had pleased him and that my proposal seemed to please him. To seal the deal I reached up and kissed him softly. We remained silent for a while, him caressing me over his own shirt and me enjoying the closeness.
âI like you a lotâ
âI had a feeling,â I teased, earning a soft laugh from him âI really like you, too."
He pressed a kiss to my forehead and for some stupid reason a blush crept up my cheeks, even though we had just had sex. I carefully placed myself on top of his body and buried my face in his neck, feeling him hug me around the waist.
It didn't take long for him to fall asleep, I could tell by how calm his breathing was becoming, and I tried to enjoy the peace he emanated a little longer, until, eventually, Morpheus picked me up in his arms too.
Upon arriving at the building, the first thing Spencer encountered was a figure skillfully moving their hands, sitting in a lotus position, hunched over the sofa in the common area of the apartments.
The man was renting that apartment. Most of those who rented in that place were young people, some studying at university and others simply too comfortable to find something better. You, however, did not fall into either of those categories.
You were the niece of the elderly landlord and apparently lived with her after some unpleasant family situations. Thatâs why you were usually around, and seeing you knit had become a habit of his.
âHelloâ
âHi, Spencer! How have you been?â you asked, with a cheerful expression on your face. You werenât wearing shoes, and there was a basket with a bunch of yarn on the floor, from which you were probably taking for whatever garment you were making.
âGood, a bit⌠busy, but everything has been fine.â
âI heard that the other day you helped my aunt with some plumbing work that needed doing. I didnât know you had that kind of knowledge.â
âIt was something very basic, nothing out of this world,â he murmured, trying to be modest. âWhat are you knitting?â
Spencer wasnât used to talking much with the other tenants, perhaps out of shyness or perhaps because he didnât want to interact with people in general. But with you, it was different; you always seemed interested in what he said and often showed yourself to be friendly. Thatâs why he didnât mind sitting on the other sofa for a while.
âA blouse; I have a rough ideaâŚâ you carefully pulled out a simple handmade drawing from the basket and held it out to him. âI still donât know if those will be the colors; Iâm deciding.â
âHow do you have so much time to do that?â he asked, genuinely interested.
âKnitting isnât that hard once you get used to it. Itâs all about following patterns, and before you know it, you have something solid to wear.â
You carefully approached him and developed quite an informative chat about the types of stitches, needles, yarn, colors, thickness⌠you were quite the expert on the subject.
He didnât know there was so much to know to carry out such an activity, and suddenly, he felt a certain admiration for your work. He was known for his clumsiness when it came to motor skills, so conceiving the idea of being able to do that was something extremely strange for him.
Suddenly, you took out your phone to show him some other pieces you had made: sweaters, blouses, scarves, mittens, hats, dressesâŚ
âHave you ever considered selling your work? Theyâre beautiful.â
âOh, no. Itâs too personal, you know? Thatâs why I only knit for myself, my family, and friends.â
âWell, youâre very skilled, to be honest. If you made custom pieces, Iâd definitely buy one.â
âWhat do you like most?â you asked excitedly, moving closer to him âSweaters? Vests? A scarf, maybe?â
âNo! You donât have to do it if you donât want to. It was just an idea. Donât worry about it,â he murmured immediately, trying to dismiss the thought from your mind.
However, you were already plotting a plan. You knew from your aunt that his birthday was coming soon, and you thought: what could be better than giving him something?
Although you pretended to let the matter pass, you continued seriously considering what would be the most suitable gift to knit for your friend. Because you were friends, right? You hoped so.
You both continued talking about trivialities after that, and you continued with your work as the conversation flowed. You clearly knew he couldnât stay with you all afternoon, so when he told you he had to leave to fulfill other obligations, you thanked him for the time he had given you.
From that day on, you kept mulling over the idea of what could be the ideal gift for your auntâs tenant. For several days, you tried to come up with a pattern, something good enough that would match his personality until you finally hit upon it. You were going to make him a collection of gifts, in fact, simply for the excitement of having someone admire your work so much. Besides, he had suggested it, and of course, you were going to stick to your rule: you only knitted for yourself, family, and friends.
Spencer went weeks without seeing you. He felt somewhat worried about your absence but assumed you were busy with your own life, not daring to ask your landlord about your whereabouts. Sometimes he saw the light in your room late at night and wondered what you might be doing, but he would never commit the imprudence of knocking on your door to look for you. That would be inappropriate because, while you werenât a child or anything, he was a couple of years older than you, and the idea of someone getting the wrong impression worried him greatly.
He couldnât see you on his birthday, and he didnât expect you to know (he hadnât told anyone in the building, as far as he remembered), but he thought it would have been nice to have your company.
It wasnât until a week later that Spencer had a clue about you when a note with something he recognized as your handwriting slid under his door.
Come to the living room :)
He was confused by the invitation, which was very unconventional, so he prepared to go where you were asking him. Once there, he was surprised to find you with a huge smile, a piece of cake with a lit candle, and a large box on the coffee table.
âSurprise!â
âHow do you know?â he asked, slightly confused but also touched by the show of affection.
âI know it was last week, but your gift wasnât ready yet, and you werenât here for your cases, and⌠well, you know. Itâs late, but I hope you like it. Come on! Come, sit down.â
You offered him the plate with the piece of dessert, and he happily blew out the small candle burning on it. After applauding that, you patted the box in front of him and brought it closer.
âDid you buy me a gift?â he asked kindly as he sat down next to you.
The box was nothing more than a cardboard box, with no decoration or flashy papers. It was just a plain, brown, large box.
âOpen it and find out.â
You looked anxious for him to see the contents, and he had no heart to refuse your excitement. When he opened it, however, he was surprised by something greater than he expected.
Inside were only knitted items: some strange-colored squares (which he would ask you about) and underneath what seemed to be a beautiful brown cardigan with a beige trim and another shade of brown. When he took it out, he was completely moved by the beauty of the garment and smiled widely when he felt the softness of the yarn.
âI donât know⌠I donât know what to say.â
âI also made you some covers for your books, or your planner, or any notebook you want,â you exclaimed excitedly. Oh, so thatâs what the squares were for âTry it on! Do you like it?â
âI love it,â he finally said, genuinely excited. âYou didnât have to do this.â
âI know I didnât have to, but I wanted to. I told you, I only knit for people I care about.â
Spencer felt extremely honored by the distinction, and for a second, he also felt embarrassed. He didnât know you considered him a friend at that level and wished he had something to give you too, even though it was his birthday.
He complied with your request and put the piece over his plaid shirt. It fit perfectly, was quite warm, and matched him very well. Suddenly, he didnât know what to say, stunned by your attention toward him and your personal gift. You had spent weeks knitting that just for him.
âAnd thereâs one more thing,â you pointed out with a smile, and he peered inside.
It was true; there was a pair of socks. But they werenât ordinary socks; they were knitted in the same way and had a particularity that made him burst into laughter.
âTheyâre mismatched!â
âI know you wear them like that. So I thought youâd like them,â you murmured, smiling.
You looked so kind and lovely that Spencer couldnât help but want to hug you, feeling grateful for what you had just gifted him.
âLet me pay you for your work.â
âAre you crazy?â you exclaimed, sounding offended. âItâs a gift, Spencer. Gifts arenât for sale. Happy late birthday!â
He didnât expect something like that from you, and just for that, he felt even happier. Throughout the winter season, he made sure to wear your cardigan as much as he could, proud to recount that you had knitted it every time someone complimented the design.
At some point during the winter, he realized that, both literally and figuratively, you had brought unparalleled warmth to his life. First with that cardigan, and of course, then with your friendship.
Welcome to another year of Angstober! We're delighted to unveil the prompts for this year of angsty, spooky fun.
What is Angstober?
Angstober is a yearly October challenge with 31 angst-themed prompts to inspire you to create. The challenge is open to all sorts of creative work - writing, art, edits, whatever you want - in whatever medium you want. Original work or fanworks? Whatever you feel inspired for!
How do I take part?
Tag your works with #angstober2024 and the day of the prompt (e.g., #day 01) to share on tumblr. Feel free to @ us directly in the post as well! To share your work on AO3, add it to the Angstober 2024 collection.
You can post your works whenever - early or late - and use as many or as few prompts as you feel inspired for! We'll do our best to reblog as many works to the @angstober blog as we can.
The sound of muffled cries filled Daryl's ears. He stopped in his tracks and cocked his head to the side, trying to find the source of the sound he was hearing. He soon discovered that it was coming from Dale's RV, and against his better judgement, he walked up the steps and opened the door, hoping to figure out who was crying. However, he stopped in his tracks when he figured out who those cries belonged to.
They belonged to you.
The sound of feet shuffling caught your attention. You quickly wiped at the tears that fell from your eyes, hoping that you could shield your true emotions from the person's gaze, but you knew it would be to no avail. You simply sniffled and looked up, prepared to tell whoever that had entered to please leave you alone. However, your words got caught in your throat when you saw it was Daryl.
Daryl's cerulean eyes locked with your own eyes. He was awkwardly fiddling with his thumbs. He wasn't entirely sure what he had expected to do once he had found out who was crying in the RV. However, although his brother's voice rang through his mind, reminding him that âchicks crying was an automatic noâ and that he should run, a strange feeling overcame him.
He wanted to kill whoever was causing you so much pain. Even though he logically knew that you could've been crying because of something else, something told him that it was your boyfriend, that Shane prick that made you cry like this.
âYa alrigh'?â He mentally kicked himself for starting with that. You obviously weren't okay. He felt like a perfect moron.
You chuckled bitterly and shook your head. âYep, I'm just peachy,â you told him with a fake smile. âBut I'll be fine. Don't need you to worry about me. Go and do... whatever it is you do.â
Daryl knew that was your way of telling him to get lost. He didn't blame you; your last interaction with him hadn't exactly been all sunshines and rainbows. The two of you had formed a friendship that was blossoming rather beautifully, but then he had snapped at you, and he didn't blame you for not wanting him to pry into your life after that. However, he couldn't stop himself from saying what he said next.
âWant me to kill 'im?â
You looked up at him with confusion clear on your features. However, you quickly realized what he meant, and you decided to play along with the jokeâwhat you didn't know was if you really wanted him to, he'd go through with it. âPlease, or else I will. I can't have a murder charge on my record. How will I find a job?â
Daryl chuckled at your joke and shrugged. âI dun' mind takin' the fall, as long as ya visit me in prison.â He took a few steps further into the RV, getting closer to you with each step. âBut seriously, what'd he do this time?â
âLori's pregnant.â
Daryl didn't need to be a rocket scientist to figure out what you meant by that. He was painfully aware of the fact that Deputy Dickâas Merle had so affectionately nicknamed himâhadn't been able to keep it in his pants, and so were you, Shane's actual girlfriend. Daryl couldn't explain it, but the urge to stab Shane for doing that to you was strong.
âAnd,â you began, snapping him from his train of thought. âI finally broke up with him. I'm mostly relieved, but I'm also... I don't know. I mean, I dedicated four years of my life to this man. I didn't expect it to end like this. Hell, I didn't expect it would end at all. We had our fights, but I never once thought he'd do this to me. And now he got another woman pregnant, and I don't even know if Rick knows. If he doesn't, how do I possibly break this news to him?â
Daryl didn't know how to respond to that. He hadn't expected to have all of that dumped onto him. Feelings and comforting had never been his strong suits, so he didn't know how to make you feel better.
You laughed bitterly and shook your head. âI'm sorry for dumping all of that on you. Just forget I said anything.â
No, he wouldn't have any of that. He may not be able to comfort you, but maybe he could distract you. And after seeing the flowers in the vase on the counter, he knew exactly how.
âYa know that Merle was really into flowers when we were younger?â
You scoffed in disbelief, but when you saw he was being serious, your eyes widened in disbelief and a smirk tugged at the corners of your lips. âSeriously?â
Daryl nodded. âI didn't know 'bout this until he was high one night. We were out on a huntin' trip and he had his nose all covered in some drug. He had jus' had a bad encounter with a boar he didn't kill properly. I was cookin' up some squirrel stew when Merle pointed out to a bunch'a flowers in the distance. âDo ya know what daisies represent?â he had asked me, real serious, too. Of course, I didn't know, so he told me, âThey represent innocence, purity, but above all else? They represent new beginnings. We're gon' grab the bull by the horns and take the world by storm, lil' brother. They ain't ready for us Dixons, that's for sure.â Yeah, that was bullshit. Ain't much of our lives that changed.â Daryl cut himself off before he could ramble any more.
You smiled at him, your heart fluttering at the sight of his shyness. Was it just you, or was Daryl kind of stunning? âDaisies really represent that?â
Daryl nodded. âYeah. I looked it up. It actually does. M'surprised Merle knew that, though, but I didn't bring it up. Merle would just deny it and give me one hell of a beatin' if I did.â Daryl took a flower from the vaseâa daisyâand extended it towards you. âWhat m'trynna say with that whole story s'that the situation with Shane and Lori definitely sucks, but ya can't let it get ya down. Be like a daisy. S'yer opportunity to start fresh. S'yer new beginnin'. Dun' let this be yer setback.â
A few beats of silence passed. Daryl was beginning to think that he had overstepped his boundaries, and he was about to pull back, mumble a âsorryâ and hightail it out of there. However, you finally took the flower from him and sent him a small smile.
âThat's actually kind of wise. Thank you.â
Daryl shrugged and took a few steps back. âAin't nothin'.â
âWhatever you say,â you told him with a small smirk. It soon turned into a more genuine smile, however, when you glanced down at the daisy in your hand. âI needed that. Just... thank you.â
A moment of silence passed before Daryl spoke up with his usual nonchalant demeanour. âYeah, yeah. No need to get all mushy 'bout it. Jus' can't have ya mopin' 'round camp and bringin' the mood down.â
You chuckled and shook your head. âThere's the Daryl I know.â
And for some reason, as you looked up at him, you realized that you wouldn't want Daryl any other way.
Warnings: age gap (Daryl is in his 40s and reader is in her 20s), sexual tension, SMUT, oral (f), fingering, overstimulaton, thigh riding, unprotected sex, degradation (use of slut, whore), hair pulling, kissing, Daryl whimpers, insecure Daryl about his scars, slightly perv Daryl (he watches reader change)
Summary: After spending a supply run together, the sexual tension between you and a certain archer becomes almost too much and threatens to overcome the both of you.
Song Rec while reading:
wRoNg: ZAYN
Worship: Ari Abdul
Shameless: Camila Cabello
Daryl Dixon was known to have a short temper, and an even shorter patience tolerance. When Michonne and Gabriel sent him on a supply run with none other than you, he knew that he would have to keep his cool or he will lose his mind and he can't risk that. He thought that if he just ignored the way his breath hitched in his throat when your breasts bounce in your black tank top with every step you take to his motorcycle.
"Hiya, Daryl!" You call as you sling your bow and arrow over your shoulder before making yourself comfortable on his bike.
He just grunts in return before kicking the kickstand up and taking off. Your hands wrap around his torso and he takes a deep breath as he reminds himself that he needs to breathe through his nose or he is gonna pass out.
---
You hummed to yourself as you walked through the store in a small run down town. It was a clothing store, or well was once before the world ended. Clothes were hanging on the racks and then you saw the underwear section. It was perfect. You needed new panties and you knew that some of the other ladies at Alexandria would enjoy new pairs. You went to the shelves and started packing as many as you could before turning to Daryl when you found some see through lace panties.
"Hey, Daryl?" You ask quietly.
"What? Ya good?" He asked, small panic rushing into his brain. Hopefully you didn't hurt yourself. He had only left you in that section of the store for maybe five minutes.
"Do you think these would make my butt look good?" You ask with a serious face while holding up the undergarments.
"For fuck's sake!" He groaned as he turns away. "Don't ask stupid shit like that." He takes a moment before turning back around and replied, "Yes they would make your butt look good."
You turned away from him with a smile. You grabbed a couple more like that pair in your size and threw them into your pack. After searching a couple more store, you and Daryl started back into the woods and went tracking for something to eat. Night fell upon the two of you before you knew it and you looked for a place to set up camp in a small house just a few miles from the town.
Checking to see if there were any walkers, you and Daryl made your way into the semi-decent house. It was no where near perfect but it would be good for the night before you leave for the next town in the morning.
Daryl came into the house with some firewood and threw it into the fireplace. You looked around the house for lanterns to have light and lit some matches inside of them. Once the house had some light, it dawned on you that it was just you and Daryl in this house. The fireplace sent a yellowish orange lighting onto Daryl and his blue eyes shone in contrast to the lighting. You stood at the stove and was heating up some beans and bread that you had found in a store. You smiled at idea of living with Daryl and cooking for him. You smiled at the idea of a possible normal life as normal as it could be in the end of the world.
Sitting down across from Daryl, the two of you ate your food. Daryl kept his eyes on his bowl and didn't look up at you until you cleared your throat.
"You don't like me, do you?"
Daryl put his spoon in his bowl, shoveling a bunch of the beans into his mouth before setting the bowl on the floor beside him. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and then he turned his head to look at you. He fought to keep his eyes connected to yours instead of looking at your rising and falling chest. God he felt like he was a creep, like he was a teenager again. It wasn't him trying to sexualize you, he really didn't mean to but when you were looking at him like that, breathing like that, he was really struggling to maintain eye contact.
"I don't hate ya," He says, his blue eyes darting in between yours and the wall behind you.
You shuffle closer to him before placing your hand on his chin, turning his face to you. His eyes stayed on your face, suddenly he was at a loss of words, not that he had many in the first place but still.
"If you didn't hate me, you would be able to look at me for more than two seconds before scoffing and turning away," You giggle with a smile and then move closer. "What is it about me that you don't like looking at?"
You had the biggest crush on Daryl Dixon and you barely tried to hide it from anyone but him. He was tall, strong, handsome, and very, very good at protecting people. He had a hard exterior, but he was really a big softy for the people he cared for. How could you not like him?
"There isn't anythin' 'hat I don't like lookin' at," He says, blush creeping up his face. "I jus' don't know why ya make me crazy."
"I make you go crazy, Daryl?" You ask. "You have no idea how crazy you make me."
Your faces creep closer, you were basically straddling the archer as you pressed yourself closer to his body, desperate for his warmth. Your eyes flicker to his lips quickly before snapping back to his cool eyes. You wondered what his lips would feel like on yours. What they would feel like running over your body.
Daryl's hands came up to your face to move some hair out of your eyes and he cupped your jaw. He tilted his head up, barely, almost brushing your plump lips. Your lips part slightly, ready to grant Daryl's full permission to do whatever he wanted to do to yours. Just as the distance was about to close, your eyes closing, breathing heavily, a walker's growl could be heard from outside the window and Daryl all but throws you off him (not really much of a throw, just nudging you off him quickly), and he takes care of the walker. He stabs the monster in the head, blood splattering onto his face and clothes before he turns to you and then walks out of the house.
----
Making your way through the woods, Daryl refused to say anything to you. You had tried to make small talk but he ignored you. He kept walking as he scanned for prey, hopefully a deer or a pig. He didn't really care, as long as he had something to kill and take his mind off the way that you made him feel last night. You were so much younger than himself and he didn't want to seem like a creepy old man who would nut in his pants from just seeing your tits bounce a few times.
Daryl would have intense dreams where your tits were bouncing because you were bouncing on his dick and he was pulling your hair back so your neck was arched backwards and he would mark you up as his while you rode him.
He shook the thoughts from his mind as he remembers that you were right behind him. He turned to you to see you kneeling down by the ground, looking at tracks on the ground.
"What are ya lookin' at?" He asked, his voice startling you before you relaxed.
You looked up at him before pointing left.
"These are fresh tracks, looks like a deer."
"Good, let's go."
"I need to apologize about what happened last night," You said as you walked quietly.
"Shhh," He said.
"I really am sorry about that, Daryl, I don't know what overcame me."
"I said, shhh, girl."
Just as you crept down behind a fallen tree, the deer walked out from behind the tall grass and started to eat at the fallen nuts on the ground. As much as you were hoping to be able to pay attention, Daryl's scent filled your nose as you realized how close you were and you could feel your panties dampen at the sight in front of you. You looked at Daryl and saw his thick muscles of his arms flex as he lifted his crossbow and aimed at the deer. You watched as he licked his lips gently as he closed one of his eyes. You watched his chest move with his breathing. You noticed everything. You needed to get this deer and then get back home before you tried to fuck him right out in the open woods.
"Let's go home," you said as you loaded the deer onto his bike.
"We are supposed to hit another town just a few miles over," He said.
"Yes but we have a deer which will draw more walkers to us," You said. "Let's drop it off with our people and then come out again."
---
Daryl listened to you because he knew you would throw a fit and then he would want to fuck your attitude away. He didn't just want to fuck you, he wanted to love you. He wanted to come home to you every night, fuck you to sleep, and then cuddle with you as he tells you about his day. Before you, he never thought that he would want the "normal" life like everyone else. He never had anyone to come home to and he had become used to it. Now he wanted to share a home with you. He wanted to take care of you. He wanted to protect you.
While the two of you were camping out in the woods, your shirt and pants had been torn after a run in with a herd of walkers. You told Daryl that you were going to change and then you went behind his poncho hanging up on a branch. You thought that you were covered completely, but the poncho had other plans as it had fallen from the branch while you were turned away. Your entire body was on display for Daryl as you bent over in just your black panties to pick up a shirt you had gotten from the run down shop the other day.
Daryl knew that he should have turned away, to respect you, but something in his sick, twisted mind, he kept looking. He saw your skin shine in the bright moon light. He saw every curve you have and he wanted nothing more than to just mark every inch of your skin as his. You were his, even if you didn't know yet. He eventually couldn't handle it anymore and moved to pick up the poncho. His footsteps made you turn away but he had already covered you with the poncho.
"It slipped from the branch and I didn't want ya to be uncomfortable," He said as he stepped closer to cover your body completely.
"Thank you," You smile as you tilt your head up to look at him in his eyes. His hands were on your hips as he wrapped you up. You bit your lip softly and his thumb came up to release your bottom lip from your teeth, slowly stroking over it with such care. His eyes watched for your reaction and you had none but heavy breathing. He licked his own lips quickly and leaned in slightly, still checking your eyes for any sign of you not wanting his actions, finding none. Just as his lips were brushing yours, a hiss came from the fire as it died out and the world went dark.
He quickly pulled away and turned away from you. He cleared his throat and then muttered a quick "sorry" and then went to rebuild the fire.
---
Arriving back at your house after a few days being gone, you took a shower as soon as you got home. You walked into your room in just a towel before pulling out clothing from your closet. The shirt you picked out was one of Daryl's button downs that you stole when you were staying in his house before moving into your own.
Daryl walked up to your room as he needed to talk to you about the other night. He didn't know what had came over him but he needed to clear it up with you. He knocked on your door, thinking of all the things he would say but as soon as the door opened and you revealed that you were in just a shirt and panties. Just not any shirt, his shirt. His shirt was on your body. Your naked body. He didn't know what made him grab your face and pull you into a searing kiss, but he pulled your body closer to his as he walked you backwards into the room.
He kicked the door closed and turned you against it. He started to leave kisses down from your lips to your neck. He sucked at your pulse point and then your hands pulled his face back up to yours. His lips enclosed yours as you messily made out against your door. His hand went to the back of your knee and wrapped it around his hip, opening you up to him as his clothed core ground into yours as your hand found his hair. He let out a groan as your fingers twisted into his long strands.
Daryl's mouth pressed against yours as he swallowed your every sound as you whimpered for more. Daryl's fingers slid down to your panties and teased your clit behind the fabric. His fingers glided against your clothed clit in tight circles as you moaned for him, begging him to fuck you. A smirk came over his face as your head lulled back, opening your neck to him. He started to suck on your sweet spot as his fingers slid your underwear to the side and sunk in to the knuckle.
"Fuuuuuck," You groan as Daryl's fingers started to pump in and out of your body. Daryl smiled at you as he slowly kissed lower and lower as he removed his hand from your panties to rip open his shirt. He kissed down your body, slowly sucking on your nipples and lulling his tongue over the nipple before biting it softly, causing you to gasp in slight pain.
"You like it when I touch ya like this?" He asks, running his middle finger up your slit before popping it into his mouth to suck the juices off of it. "Fuck, ya sweeter than I thought."
"Daryl," You moan as he slowly kisses your thighs, your back arching off the wall.
"Move to the bed and spread your legs for me like a good littl' slut," He demands. The derogatory name made you feel more slick drip from your pussy.
Daryl slowly pulled his shirt over his head, wincing as your eyes roam over his scars. He goes to put his shirt back on but you move to stop him.
"Don't hide from me," You say softly. "You're beautiful."
You move to the edge of the bed and press a kiss to the scar on his chest, then the one on his torso. You lick up the one on his collarbone. You turn him around and you kiss each one on his back. You trace them as if you were tracing roads on a map.
"You are so beautiful, Daryl," You whisper against his skin before turning him around to face you. "Every inch of you is beautiful, even the damaged parts."
Something snaps inside of him and he pushes you back gently and he crawls over you like a predator to his prey. He kissed your lips and then he started to kiss down your body, tracing every curve into his muscle memory. He wanted to savor this into his mind forever.
"Did I ever tell ya 'hat ya make me crazy?" He asks.
"Maybe once before," You giggle but it quickly turn into a moan when he licks up your pussy. You grip onto the sheets, holding you grounded to earth before you floated away. Daryl notices you holding onto the sheets and he grabs your hands, making you think that he just wanted to hold them but he then moves them to his hair. He nods at you and then curls his tongue inside you which makes you cry out and tug at his hair. He moans against you and slips a finger inside your weeping hole which he then pays more attention to your clit with his tongue.
"Cum for me," he moans against you. His eyes watch as the band inside your stomach snaps as he continues to add another finger and play with your cunt. Your hips start to wiggle away from him but he pulls your body flush against his face as there is no room for any air for him to possibly breathe. All he could breathe in was you. He could only see you, taste you, and breathe you. He was alive for you and this sole moment.
Eventually Daryl had pulled two more climaxes out of you and he then starts to kiss back up your twitching body. He rolls over and goes to cuddle you but you lay there confused.
"We are not done," You smile before climbing onto his thigh. Slotting your legs on each side, you slowly start to grind down onto him. He sits up and places his hands onto your hips, helping your movements.
"Fuck ya such as whore for me, ya gotta fuck my thigh?" He says with a smirk.
"Please," You moan out, head falling back.
Daryl pushes you off of him long enough to take his pants and underwear off and then he pats his lap, beckoning you to come closer. You move into his lap and he places your hands on his shoulders as he moves his cock to be lined up with your entrance.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asks, making sure that you were one hundred percent certain that you wanted him to do this.
"Please, Daryl, just fuck me!" You groan out and then Daryl eases his tip into your weeping pussy.
"Fuck," You moan as you slowly stretch on his dick. "Please, just get inside me!"
Daryl looks at you for one second, taking in your face before cupping your cheek. He then snaps his hips forward and his entire dick goes inside you, kissing your cervix lightly. You scream at the intrusion and he gently soothes your hair as he speaks praise into your ear. He then pulls almost all the way out and then snaps back inside harshly. Your hands cling to his shoulders as one arm wraps around his neck and grip onto his shoulder. Daryl's arm wraps around your torso and the other hooks under your arm and his hand grips your shoulder, squeezing tightly as he pounds into your pussy with slow, harsh thrusts.
You head falls backward as Daryl's fingers wrap into your hair and pulls your face closer to his so he roughly kiss you. It was messy, all teeth and spit dripping everywhere. Your lips moved in fierce movements as they tried to keep up with each others. Your hips bounced against Daryl's as the two of you tried to get to the finish line. Daryl grips you tightly before using his body weight to flip the two of you over and he catches himself with one arm on the bed as your legs wrapped around his torso, your arms holding onto him for dear life as he fucked into you with punishing thrusts.
Daryl's dick moved inside of you in fast, rough movements, hitting your cervix at times but was always hitting your g-spot. Your head was thrown back as you cling to him and he moves one hand to the headboard as he stares down at you, your hair laying out around your head like a crown and he whimpered when your pussy clenched around his thick cock. He gently moved your legs down from his torso and spread you out further as he moved back onto his knees, leaning over through his arms to kiss your forehead before he reared his hips back, and snapped them forward, driving home in a hard thrust.
You scream in pleasure and borderline pain but it was so good. You dig your nails into Daryl's back as he drops his head into your neck as his hands are clinging to the headboard that was beating a possible hole into the wall as you plant one hand against the base of the headboard to keep your head from slamming into it. Your mouth is agape as Daryl nibbles on your collarbone as his hips slam into yours, surely leaving bruises that you will feel for days after this.
"Fuck ya look so pretty, looking at me like that," He moans as you throw your head back into the pillows, begging him for more, to make you come.
"You wanna cum?" He asks, one of his hands slipping from the headboard and coming down to rub fast circles on your clit, adding fuel to the fire that is boiling inside your core. Your body screamed for release.
"You gonna cum for me, pretty girl?" He smirks. "Fuck ya feel so good, baby. This pussy was built for me. God, I don't 'ver wanna leave it. Jesus, look at that. Your pussy is just sucking me in, she don't want me to leave either."
You moan at his filthy words before begging him to let you cum. Your hands reach for his neck and pulls him down to kiss him. Just as his lips brush against yours, the band inside you snaps and you let out a muffled scream against his lips. He was close already before you came but after feeling you cum around his cock, he knew that it was just a matter of time before he cumming all over you.
"Daryl, cum inside me."
Those four words made his hips snap faster against yours and then you felt him still against you, then a warm liquid spilled inside you as Daryl's body shuddered above you. You heard him whimper and groan as more and more ropes of thick cum spilled from his dick. Your hands rub up and down his back as you kissed his collarbone.
Daryl rolled over and pulled you with him, lifting you off his softening dick and then covered you both with your blanket. He kissed your forehead and moved the few strands of hair from your face and then kissed your lips.
"Can I ask a question?" You ask as you draw circles on his chest.
Daryl just grunts in response.
"Do you still not like me?"
"I swear to God woman. You still think I don't like ya?"
"Well, I can't be too careful," You smile up at him. "So do you like me?"
He leaned his head down and kissed you on the lips, soft and slow, before fulling back.
"Does that answer your question?" He asks with a huff.
"I'm not fully convinced," You smile before climbing back on top of him and starts pressing kisses to his neck.
"Ya're gonna kill me, woman!" He groans with a smile before grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you into a crushing kiss, rolling on top of you to further prove that he likes you.
It's just... idk man. People are weird. Being a person is weird. Society is weird. The universe is weird. Rather than having to "normalize" everything, just accept that some people are weird. So are you. Nothing is normal. the rules are all made up. I once saw a Klingon pushing a baby stroller down the street in toronto. The world is a weird place, man. Just roll with it.
warnings:Â infidelity (reader is Aemond's wife), incest, spoilers of s2ep5. Just something short and self indulgent, hope you like it!
masterlist
When you arrived at Aegon's chambers, he was alone. Your mother wasnât by his side, nor was his wife Helaena, much less Aemond, who you were sure had been the cause of all that. Everyone was crazy, the war for power was making everyone's head sick in the Red Keep and it had ended up bringing you to that point.
When you learned that your brother had gone into battle when he wasnât required, you knew that the consequences were going to be disastrous and you even hoped that upon returning to King's Landing the star news was the death of the king. But thank the gods he was still alive, fighting, but alive.
You hadn't dared to look at him until that moment, mentally unable to think that his body had been stained at the hands of dragon fire. Targaryens don't burn, do they? Could it be your ancestors punishing Aegonâs recklessness?
And you were sure they would punish the sin of parading a dragon's head around town. They were sacred, they were your emblem and your heritage... you thought that your mother would have this more in mind and that she wouldnât approve of that kind of massacre. You couldn't imagine your beloved Kaeryss going into battle, dead at the hands of the enemy or perhaps even your own brother.
But now it was a dragon war, not even men could stop it.
âFor the sevenâŚâ you sobbed softly, you barely got close to your brother and the whole smell of burnt flesh and rot filled your nostrils.
The maester had managed to do a few things to him, he was completely bandaged and was breathing heavily, a hiss leaving his lips with every exhale he took. It was a horrible sight to see for anyone, much less the only person who had genuinely loved Aegon.
The sight made you stagger back and you had to hold on to the bedposts to keep from falling. The worst thing of all was to think that it was the king who had brought this on himself, no matter how much they wanted to convince all his subjects that he had fought bravely and had struck down Meleys.
If you had known before what he intended to do, you would have implored him to stop, you would have persuaded him with kisses and cuddles to stay in the palace. Damn, you would have gotten him drunk and fucked for hours if it kept him safe. Or ultimately, you would have told him how stupid he was for trying to go to war solely on a whim, with a dragon with no experience in battle being ridden by a man with less experience.
But past mistakes couldn't be corrected just by thinking about all the possibilities, instead you had to face the consequences.
You looked at him for a moment, trying to put aside the tremendous disgust that the burning flesh produced in you. If you dared to say that out loud, you knew that Aegon would feel tremendously hurt, since he had never boasted of having the best self-esteem, so you had to be cautious with your words and gestures when he came to his senses.
You took a seat next to the bed, in a modest chair that had surely been occupied by someone else hours before, and you tried to hold back the tears that were already gathering in your eyes. While you saw the king lying in bed, at risk of dying at any moment, you wondered how far this conflict would go.
Aegon had always expressed that he didnât want to be king and now that he was, he turned out to be a useless one. You werenât going to soften truths in your mind, because you, as everyone knew, that the king's claim had been a treacherous one. You had been happy that your sister could aspire to be a queen, even if you hated her and her unbearable descent. But hating her didn't mean you wanted to see so many people die, much less the innocent and weak ones as always happened.
Sometimes you wondered what would have happened if your parents had married you to Aegon instead of your brother Aemond. You couldn't blame Helaena for hating her husband, just as you hated yours, perhaps for different reasons but with the same impetus. You probably would have preferred to marry him because of the treatment he had always offered you, being kind, loving and careful. And you knew that it was wrong to love him secretly from your husband and that it was a very serious offense for a lady, but you didn't care and you assumed that if Aemond knew, he didn't care either. He never loved you, you didn't know the reasons but you were sure of it.
One of your hands traveled to the man lying on the bed to take it, carefully, and you gently caressed the healthy skin that still remained.
âMummy?â you heard, like an almost imperceptible moan. Aegon could barely open his right eye weakly.
âNo, no, honey. Itâs me,â you whispered sweetly, leaning slightly so he could hear you over the smell of rot. You said your name out loud just in case he didn't recognize your voice.
He wanted to say something, but at first the tremendous pain in his chest prevented him from doing so. The maester said that he must have had many internal injuries and that only time and the grace of the gods could decide if those injuries were serious enough to kill him. You hoped not.
âMy princess,â he managed to gesture.
You were always called that way, simply because Aegon considered that you did him full honor to the title and because you seemed to him his and no one else's.
âDon't try too hard,â you whispered motherly, reaching out to rub the right side of his face with unexpected love. You had to stay calm to ignore the burns. âYou need to rest.â
Aegon, from his vulnerable position, looked at you sadly and you saw a tear escape his eye. It was as if with that look he was expressing to you everything he couldn't tell you.
âDoes it hurt a lot?â you asked worried. It was an obvious answer, you thought, but you at least wanted him to realize that the situation mattered to you.
When he nodded weakly, you felt tremendously sorry for him. Seeing him like this completely broke your heart and if you could have done it, you would have wished you could take away all that pain in a second.
âMy poor boyâŚâ you murmured softly, still caressing his cheek gently. The man felt as if your touch was magical, healing in every way: the simple fact of having you close comforted him.
âStay?"
âOf course I do, Aegon,â you said in a whisper.
âI'm⌠I'm horrendousâ
âYou're not,â you responded to his sob. The last thing you wanted was for him to think that you were despising him, like everyone else was going to do. You had managed to gain his trust before, however, with this physical change you knew that his fears would only increase âI love you always, honey. I promise"
And as a sign of this, you leaned close enough to place a kiss on his lips. You were very careful not to touch his wounded skin and tried to be as kind as possible with him. You wanted to show him that you weren't afraid of him, nor disgusted by him, as he was probably thinking.
There was no purer love like the one you were showing him and Aegon felt unworthy of it.
"Please⌠donât leaveâ
âI won't,â you assured him, sitting back down and leaning against the mattress. âDon't be afraid, I'm here and I'll stay to take care of you all night, okay?â
Aegon cried silently and tried to hold on to the feeling of your hand holding his, for it was the only feeling that would keep him sane. He felt that as long as you continued to love him and stayed with him, he could overcome any adversity.
