lizard

carmen//pnw//she/her bored af | boring af

[literallylizard]

ladies, gentlemen, and every star in our gender constellation

Philanax the Fool from Head Over Heels

[dioynsus]

i want that really cliché friend group who takes long drives together and takes pictures of each other when they’re not looking and goes on random picnics and visits museum together fuck i want it so bad where y’all at

[wealthyhugepenis-deactivated201]

i really like stickers but at the same time i don’t because once you stick them somewhere that’s it, it’s finished, and i’m just not emotionally stable enough for that responsibility

[diabadass]

I have been waiting for this post my whole life.

[baby-revenge]

I was trying to explain this to someone one day and they basically told me I was crazy.

[yungterra-blog]

You want my phone number? It’s useless. The best way to contact me is to fill a human skull with acorns and vigorously shake it into the night. I will hear you eventually.

[scatteringstarslikesprinkles-de]

In other news, my boyfriend’s perfect hair is still perfect

[yungterra-blog]

what the fuck ok

[dollymyfolly-deactivated2026032]

I’m the type of person who holds on to ticket stubs and photos and presses flowers but never puts them into a scrapbook I just have them scattered everywhere which brilliantly illustrates how I’m a sentimental piece of shit who can’t put their life together

[hurricaneclouds]

i support girls anger. i support girls who yell. i support girls who get called bitches and cunts at parties because they’ll swear at guys who won’t leave them alone. i support girls who don’t believe in second chances and cut off people who hurt them. i support girls who say no the first time and flip you off if you ask them again. i support girls who will never allow themselves to be pushovers and constantly get shit for it. you’re fucking incredible. 

[communistbakery-deactivated2017]

gf: babe we’re in the middle of having sex, stop quoting diary of a wimpy kid me: zoo wee mama!

[k1mkardashian]

are you ever dancing in the privacy of your room and you’re goin awf and you stop for a second because you think that maybe JUST MAYBE the feds truly are watching….?

[mischon]

[adamusprime-deactivated20180809]

if you didn’t know stuff about humans you would think they get mad at the weirdest stuff

like one human raises their thumb to another human

that’s good, humans like that

one human raises their middle finger to another human

humans do NOT LIKE THAT

humans think that is a BAD FINGER

don’t you DARE raise that specific finger at me

any other finger is ok just not that one

[tkingfisher]

Anthropology will be the hard elective in alien school.

[fieldbears]

“Is the middle finger weaponized? Does it spray a venom perhaps” “No, student Xeepzorp, it is frail and harmless like the others” “Fascinating”

[mydeddyalabama]

how are the civilians in the marvel universe surprised by anything ever like every time something happened i would just be like

“there they go wit that bs”

[nutmeg101]

Date someone you can be fucking weird as hell with who at the end of the day still wants to get naked with you.

[when-the-blood-comes-home]

[when-the-blood-comes-home]

[twinkle-twinkle-little-fuck]

uterus during period: Ohmygod I’m so embarrassed. I thought we were having a baby. DONT LOOK AT THIS! *rips down baby wallpaper* PLEASE JUST IGNORE THIS! *tears apart baby room* LETS PRETEND THIS NEVER HAPPENED.

[the-magpie-constellation-deacti]

it’s so cute when a really fat bumblebee comes and bops against the window and immediately bumbles away like oh deary me I am terribly sorry that wasn’t where I should have been going oh what a silly sausage I am

[fidefortitude-deactivated202011]

i love your take on the inner commentary of a bee because we all see these things differently. i always imagined that if bees had a conscious inner commentary it was of a really really faint angry screaming. the bee’s just going ‘FUCK FUCK FUCK I HIT A FUCKIN WINDOW SHIT FUCK I’M GONNA FUCK UP THIS FLOWER INSTEAD S H I T I HIT ANOTHER WINDOW F U CK’ except it’s really really faint because it’s small because it’s a bee

[frogmunist-deactivated20190724]

This is the kind of quality content I want to see on my dashboard

[toxl-deactivated20130821]

[roobics]

announcements at school