#I can fix him, unless-
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@littlestylesbee
#I can fix him, unless-
i think if i were a jedi i would make it my life mission to make yoda angry. i would give anything to hear his little goblin voice mutter the words “thin fucking ice, you are on” and click his little cane on the ground. i would do anything. kick him as im walking and be like “oh sorry didnt see you there.” go with him to the market and try to buy him for four credits and say “oh my bad i thought you were a head of cabbage.” raise all the chairs in the jedi temple just an inch. catch him while he’s sleeping and paint his little nails and then be like “odd that someone caught you slippin master yoda. wonder who could have done that.” leave crumbs in his seat in the jedi council. i mean i would do anything
au where obi-wan is a young, up and coming galactic senator from Stewjon and he gets special permission to access the Jedi Temple Archives because he looks very polite. Meanwhile, Anakin is a feral desert child still who is very protective of his new home and he sees a stranger in his home so he goes into attack mode.
Later after obi-wan gets anakin off of him (and stems his bleeding from several different bite marks), he’s like “I showed you my visitors badge??” And Anakin sniffs and is like “well I can’t read basic yet! That could say anything!!”
And so obi-wan finds himself going to the Temple much more than planned that year in order to teach this baby how to read (and quickly nip his “actually dictators are cool and the best system of governance” thoughts in the bud)
Culminating in Senator Obi-Wan needing a Jedi escort and thinking of Anakin first, only to be very surprised when the stubborn and knobby-kneed 9 year old he met all those years ago has turned into a very attractive and solemn young man who is very passionate about keeping obi-wan safe (and marking him all up with a different kind of bite mark all together)
Favorite Moments from Long Way Up → Ewan Lookin’ Comfy
Ewan: Oh, I haven’t turned the fuel on—do you think that would help? Charley: That would help, yeah.
The Hunger Games, Actual Teen style!
On the left, 15-year-old Josh Hutcherson.
On the right, 16-year-old Jennifer Lawrence.
Think how much creepier it would be to see them killing other kids when they look so squishy-cheeked and little.
“Think how much creepier it would be to see them killing other kids when they look so squishy-cheeked and little.”
THAT’S THE POINT SUZANNE COLLINS WAS TRYING TO MAKE
Think about these cute squishy kids being forced into a romance in order to survive
And the threat of these cute squishy kids being forced into prostitution after the games are over.
REBLOGGING THIS AGAIN WITH A REMINDER THAT FINNICK WAS 14 WHEN HE WAS REAPED/WON THE GAMES AND WAS FORCED INTO PROSTITUTION SOON AFTERWARD
wait the kids were forced into prostitution after they won???
Some of the Victors were, especially if they were attractive to lots of rich people during the games. How do you think you pay off the parachute things people send you to help you win the game? Those books were so fucked up
That’s why I feel like actual teens should have been cast in the movie. It would have hammered in the message of the books so much more.
And if they had cast actual teenages, I’m sure they wouldn’t have focus so much on romance in the films. They would have focus on the horror of the hunger games, like they damn well should have.
The hunger game movies are the exact thing the hunger game books was trying to warn us about
Just going to add in a few other things that a lot of people seem to miss because it was either de-emphasized or cut entirely from the movies:
-Haymitch Abernathy was 16 when he won the Hunger Games, and the Capitol attempted to force him into prostitution as they did with Finnick and many other popular victors. He refused, and in retaliation, they gradually killed off everyone he loved one by one—his friends from home, his family, his girlfriend. He began drinking heavily at a young age to deal with the trauma of the Games, the loss of everyone he’d ever cared about, and subsequently having to continually relive the trauma of the Games in mentoring roughly 50 children, two each year, whom he’d then have to send to their deaths in the Arena.
-The Capitol also attempted to force Joanna Mason into prostitution. She, too, refused, and like with Haymitch, the Capitol retaliated by killing off everyone she loved one by one. She alludes to this in both the book and the movie version of Catching Fire, not flinching when she enters the Jabberjay area of the arena because there’s “no one left” that she loves. The movies don’t really explore this, though, while the books do more exploration both with everything the Capitol has taken from her and the lingering effects of her PTSD from her imprisonment by the Capitol.
-The only reason Peeta and Katniss weren’t forced into prostitution was because the Capitol was too invested in the “Star-Crossed Lovers from District 12″ narrative.
-Also, Katniss spent the latter half of her first Hunger Games deaf in one ear and had to have her middle and inner ear reconstructed after the Games—the explosion at the Cornucopia permanently fucked up her hearing in that ear. She’s able to hear again after the surgeries but never quite the same.
-And Peeta had a prosthetic leg! He was severely injured while fleeing the “Mutts” at the end of the Games and was bleeding out from his leg by the time he and Katniss reached the Cornucopia. Katniss gave him a tourniquet using one of her last two arrows to tighten it. Doing so saved his life, but by the time the Capitol doctors took them out of the arena, the leg was beyond saving and had to be amputated. Katniss finds this out in their “post-Games” interview with Cesar Flickerman.
-Just generally the movies glossed over or completely cut a lot of characters whose experiences in the games left them physically disabled (Katniss’s partial deafness and Peeta’s lost leg being cut entirely, Beetee’s spinal damage from the forcefield leaving him wheelchair-bound being largely kinda glossed over) or with PTSD (Katniss and Peeta’s PTSD isn’t really explored that much, Joanna’s PTSD is pretty much skipped over entirely, Annie’s barely in the movies at all, Haymitch’s entire backstory is cut, the fact that Finnick is basically just constantly putting on a show and barely holding it together under the surface isn’t ever really explored, pretty much all of the addiction subplots including Haymitch attempting to quit drinking and Katniss starting to drink at one point and everything related to morphling are cut…).
-Basically as “rough” as the movies are they sanitized the FUCK out of the Hunger Games and the world surrounding them, and that’s…not a good thing.
TL;DR: @isashi-nigami is completely correct, The hunger game movies are the exact thing the hunger game books was trying to warn us about.
Two things:
The only reason Katniss and Peeta were saved from prostitution was timing. After their own Games, the rumblings of rebellion had really started to gain traction. All victors have to do a celebratory circuit of all the Districts, but Peeta and Katniss’s celebration circuit was being used by Snow as a “everything’s fine, please don’t rebel, we’re just a pair of teenagers in live” prop tool for Snow to try and supress the rebellion. Peeta and Katniss were much more useful to him as teens in love than they were as prostitutes. Then we went straight from there to the 75th Games, in which Peeta and Katniss were fighters. Between being used to quell a revolution and having the Quarter Quell go the way it did, there was no time for Snow to loan them out to people. But had the timing been different – had there been no rebellion or had Peeta and Katniss not been central to it or had it all been delayed long enough for the post-games celebrations to die out, then yeah, they would have been sold to the highest bidder just like Finnick was.
I actually thibk that the fact that the film’s focussed on the romance and the glitz and glamour and etc was… accidentally clever, on Hollywood’s part. They certainly didn’t mean to do this, but they 100% replicated the Capitol’s attitude to the Games. They made it all about the entertainment, all about the story and the romance and the drama. So many people would have watched those movies and been taken in by the romance plot, and the revolutionary plot would have been secondary. The social commentary wouldn’t have even registered. Even the fact that they used older actors for the teens – in the books, Katniss and Peeta are never seen in public without a full face of make up once they’re Reaped. Katniss undergoes a full beauty treatment and not only is she wearing make up that makes her look older and more mature, but so is Peeta. The Capitol didn’t want them looking like fresh faced babies, and neither did Hollywood. If you watch those films merely for the entertainment they provide, then congrats. You’re the canon target audience of the Hunger Games. Hollywood was never going to make a movie that focuses on the true horrors of such a story, the way it should. Especially when the social commentary in the Hunger Games is terrifyingly similar to a social commentary on our society as a whole. No, no - they were always going to focus on the romance and the glitz and the glamour and the heroism. Which is……. kind of poetic, really. That they went and did the exact same thing that the villains did.
THIS MAN ^^^ I wrote an essay about the lack of humanity in this book and man I should’ve read this first
The whole youthful and innocent vs older and sexy thing actually gets brought up at the end of the first book.
Cinna puts Katniss in a dress that is consciously designed to make her look much younger than she actually is, so as to play up the ‘teens in love’ angle they’re trying to sell the Capitol.
But the dress also has padding, so as to make her breasts and hips seem larger than they are, since she’s been literally on the verge of starvation for weeks, and wasn’t eating that much before that, and as a result she isn’t that curvy. Katniss is shocked by this, but Cinna explains that the dress was actually a compromise, because the original Capitol plan had been to give her plastic surgery.
Katniss then realises that none of the male tributes grew facial hair in the arena, even though several of them were old enough (note: she doesn’t say that all of them were old enough. Though Rue was the youngest, this suggests that there were other tributes who were young teenagers) and that something must have been done to them to prevent that from happening.
Also, it’s worth considering that Katniss and Peeta probably looked even younger than your typical sixteen year olds.
Katniss makes a big deal about how much they both get to eat at home, but if you read between the lines, Peeta lives off stale bread from the bakery and the odd bit of meat, and Katniss is essentially living the hunter gatherer lifestyle, supplemented by what they can buy from the baker and what they can get from Prim’s goat.
They’re much more well-nourished than the bulk of District Twelve, but Katniss can still easily spot the Career Tributes, because they’re the ones who have always had enough to eat. She’s one of the older (and therefore almost certainly heavier) tributes, but she still gets to hide in trees to get away from the Careers, because she’s significantly lighter than all of them.
Malnutrition tends to push back puberty. Katniss would probably be less well-developed than a modern teenager of the same age.
Notably, we don’t hear about her getting her period— or even wondering about that like she does with the facial hair— in the arena. Which, yeah, could be because of our culture’s habit of viewing menstruation as less kid-friendly than graphic child murder and mentions of prostitution, but it’s worth considering that in real life she might well have not started it yet.
While wearing the final interview dress, even with the padding to give her bigger breasts and wider hips, she says she looks about “fourteen at most”, which even accounting for Cinna’s borderline magical design skills, suggests that she probably tends to look like a younger teen even without it.
The Hunger Games would have been almost unbearably disturbing, if they hadn’t decided to cast almost all the characters as incredibly fit twenty somethings.
…wow
I want to spend money on clothes. And float in the ocean. And get a big fat kiss on the lips. And climb a tree. Only interact if you want these things too
It’s a fantastic point, but John Boyega’s net worth also puts him at $6 million. When he says eat the rich, he isn’t safe either…
There’s a pretty big fucking difference between six million and one trillion lmao
Not to mention the way the money was made
An actor being paid for a role / doing some advertising is a world away form a man setting up a cooperate money machine that horrendously exploits workers
This is something I hate SO MUCH about how tumblr talks about money.
Like, I get that famous actors have large amounts of money, some of them are even probably overpaid (I have complicated thoughts about how actors are paid because of the nature of acting as a career), but they are exchanging labor for money, and their salaries are an expense involved in making a movie.
But like… an actor is paid for a job. They’re a worker like the rest of us. Bezos isn’t paid for a job, he’s paid for being the person who owns Amazon and despite being obscenely wealthy, he does all sorts of shitty things and to underpay and exploit his workers, and avoid paying taxes, so that more of the money Amazon generates will be profit (worker’s salaries are not profit, they’re a business expense).
These two mechanisms of acquiring money are fundamentally very different.
The reason why billionaires are evil aren’t because having money is bad, its because to get a billion dollars you have to cheat. You have to take it from someone else. If Bezos paid all his workers and suppliers fairly and treated them well, and paid his fair amount of taxes, and etc, then it literally wouldn’t matter how much money he earned, because he wouldn’t be doing anyone any harm. But its not actually possible to amass a billion dollars (a full order of magnitude bigger than a million) while behaving in an ethical manner.
Remember folks, proletariat literally means you get paid for working, whereas bourgeoisie literally means generating money via OWNING. Yeah, even the high profile actor isn’t your enemy on that basis alone - but the media executives dictating their contracts and careers are.
This is a theater stage for a play
no thats a boss battle
This is the Bregenzer Festspiele opera house, and it’s worth noting that this is not a one-off. Every single one of their productions looks like a boss battle and/or smash bros stage
These are all horrifying. Thanks for sharing
Where’s the fucking post of the guy with the huge chain whipping the swat team
Vibe check
he’s licking his lips…
he’s checking it twice…
Five minutes left, on his microwave rice
i was looking everywhere in the car for my vape because i lost it and I found these instead
I’m astounded at the level of personality that can be predicted from the word vape and these glasses.
this is the meanest thing anyone’s ever said to me in my entire life but I can’t even argue with this. what could I possibly say to defend myself in this instance. this was a one hit KO. this was a murder. this was a fucking slaughter and I have only myself to blame
the floor of mt dew and gatorade brings out a whole ‘nother level, we just know this dudes mother fucking life story.
mark hamill and carrie fisher adventures in the star wars set 🥺🤍
the star wars movie NOBODY asked for
#BUT THE ONE WE DESERVE#FUCK
I DIDN’T KNOW I NEEDED THIS UNTIL NOW