Requests, asks, and generally just talking with me is welcome!
Becoming mutuals is also welcome! Am very lonely. I don't mind if it's anonymous.
Blog rules, info, and om masterlist under the cut
Things I'll write about:
Lgbtqia+
Poly relationships
Character x Character (within reason)
Character x Reader
Crackfics (very welcome)
AUs
Slightly suggestive content/lime
Fluff
Angst
Imagines/headcanons/scenarios
Things I won't write about:
Smut
Violence/gore
Self-harm
Suicide
Yanderes
Incest
Pedophilia
Character x oc
Suggestive or romantic content about little kids even if it's aged up
Other rules:
No hate (critisism is fine tho)
Don't be disrespectful
Self inserts/ship requests, unless requested otherwise, will be gender-neutral
(This might change in the future if I see that I've forgotten some things)
Fandoms I'll write about:
Genshin Impact
This isn't limited to my usual SAGAU content. Although please don't expect me to be very lore oriented. I've lost track of the more recent lore. I only know the characters that are shown up to the Liyue story arc
Obey me
I can do the brothers and the dateables and Luke but I haven't quite gotten to the new characters yet so I don't think I can do them justice. That's why I'll only be writing about the ones I mentioned. Also all interactions with Luke will be strictly platonic.
Masterlist
My Hero Academia
I'm fine with almost anything. Any suggestive content about the kids will automatically be aged up. Unless it's smaller kids like Eri since I'm not comfortable with it. Also anything romantic with the kids will be with a reader of the same age or aged up.
Miraculous Ladybug
Again, I'm also fine with almost anything here as long as it's within my rules. I won't be making any suggestive content for this one though, aged up or otherwise.
Our Flag Means Death
Fine with almost anything here too. Only real thing I'm against is infantalizing the characters or fetishising them.
The Arcana
For this one I don't think I'll be able to do much lore based stuff since I haven't finished any routes ;; I wanted to see the coin locked stuff too badly but don't want to buy it with real money
Owl House
For this one I won't be doing any suggestive content for the kids and I will not be aging them up.
"veilguard is dark!!" they say and then their only examples are dmetas crossing, ghilannain, the blight, and the final battle gore. like girl? dark is going down into the deep roads and encountering a mad woman reciting a poem about watching her fellow dwarves be eaten and fed flesh and forcibly mutated into broodmothers. dark is learning the keeper zathrian's son was tortured to death & his daughter raped before she took her own life in shame and so he bound a spirit to a wolf to slaughter the humans responsible and infect more with lycanthropy in vengeance. dark is being told the only way for you and the love of your life to survive the battle with the archdemon is to make him impregnate your companion so the fetus can absorb the archdemon's soul(and lets not even get into how this can actually be alistair's first ever sexual experience if you DONT romance him). dark is returning to orzammar and learning your best friend could not escape fate like you did and so he becomes just another dead duster. having your entire family murdered before your very eyes and yet you must keep living. being kidnapped and nearly assaulted & killed and having to fight your way out of a mansion full of humans on your wedding day. coming face to face with the missing friend that got sucked into an eluvian and came out twisted and wrong. dark is watching duncan speak calmly and clearly even as he coldly slaughters the coward that refuses to drink from the goblet of darkspawn blood. veilguard is literally dragon age for babies. shut up
It seems that some people don't seem to understand what's so upsetting about all of this so let me help you out: Aziraphale and Crowley are DEAD.
They died, along with their entire universe and everything they ever fought for. They never got to properly talk through their creation long existence together of an undefined relationship, they never got to talk out their grievances, or religious guilt, and they never got to directly choose each other over anything else.
They never got to be an 'Us.' they never got to experience that raw unfiltered, unafraid of the consequences love we've been teased with because they were too focused on trying to hold the world together and God appearing and just fucking shit up.
This isn't just about a kiss, this is about them not getting to communicate after establishing in the other seasons that they need to be more direct with each other. This is about how after 6,000 years and before the creation of time they have been drawn towards each other and will never get to truly settle down.
This whole alternate reincarnation thing is bullshit. That's not them. They are lookalikes who have lived an entirely different history from inception. No ethical struggles, no fall, no falling in love with humanity, no existential crisis, they will have a mother and a father, possibly even siblings, they presumably have a sex and gender now that's not the same as a non human entity- fundamentally they are different beings raised as different people.
THEN you factor in the fact that their love that transcends time, their long history of trust and learning to choose to protect each other in the face of powers greater than their own, a love that is unfathomable in depth, is just FORGOTTEN.
No Bastille, no War Raid, no Flood, no wall of Eden, no Shakespeare, no Knights, no Bildad the Shoeite and Aziraphale becoming a hedonist, no powering beyond their circumstances- None of what we knew about them is at play. None of what we've grown to love about them is relevant to characters from a DIFFERENT UNIVERSE.
And that's the thing, it's a different universe. They fucking gave up and let the Earth they fought so hard for just be erased. Just like that? That's insanely out of character. What about all the poor mortals doomed to fail that Crowley sympathizes so much with? What about the history and culture written down in Aziraphale's books that they've seen built over the centuries? That's their world. Y'know: "To the world."
How could they be okay with their world, and each other dying, for the sake of people that didn't exist yet? You had the book in your hands, you could've written anything!!!
There were plenty of things they could have asked to be written differently. There were plenty of ways this story could have not put them on that situation to begin with. Sorry not sorry, but I'm not just taking handouts and saying 'yes thank you' just because they gave me content. Call me ungrateful, but I expected the narrative to at least give a singular fuck about the story and characters thus far and give us a decent execution.
I don't believe that just because something is officially released that it has to have merit, because it's still a piece of fiction written by flawed people with their own opinions and constraints on giving a shit. This was a cop out- it was a way to take the story as they were struggling to resolve, and throw it in the trash in front of its fan base for having the audacity to ask they don't leave us on a massive angry kiss cliff hanger.
Also, reading comprehension and analysis isn't just taking the slop that's force fed to you- (like wow, no shit they put some set up for the agenda they're pushing in there, congrats picking up on the obvious---) It's being able to critically think about what's happening, how it fits, whether you like it, the execution, and allowing yourself to question the author and their agenda. Writers, especially teams of writers, do stupid shit all the time
So no, I don't consider this canon; I consider it a slap in the face to the world and character dynamics we fell in love with. I see it as an insult to think I should be complacent with this half assed AU substitute billions of years after the characters I actually grew to love fucking OBLITERATED themselves when all I've been wanting since the start of the series was for them to find a resolution to their challenges- not roll over and decide 'fuck it, just start from scratch.' Canon is a suggestion, and one that I'm stepping on and ignoring fully because it contradicts the core of what's appealing about a series I started for demon/angel shenanigans. I didn't come for a wattpad fic.
Screw Jesus, who knows why he was there. Fuck Mrs.Sandwhich, best of luck in the next life. Sorry for the existential crisis' Crowley and Aziraphale, turns out you're just God's soap opera and she's decided she's bored all of a sudden because Michael threw a hissy fit from being underappreciated.
Sorry I wanted a resolution to the ride or die couple we've been following, and I was hoping they wouldn't pick DIE. Sorry that a five minute meet cute with them sporting the world's worst haircuts isn't doing it for me, especially when they don't remember shit and will only get to be together for maybe 20-30 years before dying with the presumably confirmed absence of an afterlife after watching their angel and demon selves struggle for over SIX THOUSAND YEARS!!!!
I wanted a resolution to the ineffable husbands, not some doppelganger fuckery. Sue me. This ending sucked because it resolved nothing, it accomplished nothing, and it shut down everything PAINFULLY because they are effectively dead, and all the accompanied interesting world building with them. Just switched the whole ass genre on us. You thought this was a Star crossed religious fantasy romance? PSYCH, now itâs a dime store novel. Yeah, thatâs what I signed up for. Not.
what do you mean aziraphale's final compliments to crowley are about how crowley is actually the best angel out of any of them (something crowley actively doesn't want to be. literally what 2x06 is about. like he says that out loud) and that every single person in the universe is just a purposeless rule following fictional character but he, crowley (the neil gaiman self insert) is an artist and a visionary and a creative genius. where am i
ok i watched it with my friends dead late last night and after thinking about it here are four things I think would vastly improve a lot of people's grievances with it.
After Aziraphale does the hand kiss to Crowley they look at each other. Aziraphale sees that it is ok, sees that Crowley accepts this forgiveness and then launches at him and kisses him on the mouth. We get the resolution of the kiss chevoks gun we get the queer joy. The friends i watched it with who are both gay were devastated by no kiss (it feels like for a show that is so precious to a queer audience if that is the case, something has gone wrong in the audience/script relationship) and they had so many chances!
Aziraphale and Crowley both MUTUALLY decide that they keep this messy imperfect world they love going, saving the humans they know and love. There is no ineffable plan, and heaven and hell change, maybe ceasing to exist altogether (but still keeping the angels and demon characters alive for the love of god! (And hopefully working towards understanding themselves and the universe better. Heck make a comedic beat out of that)). We dont fall into the awful Job/ Great Flood catch 22 morality set up.
Jesus fulfills his purpose in being introduced. Maybe hes the one who reminds Azi and Crow what they need to do. Maybe hes the one who saves them in the book of life. Maybe he talks to his mum. Idk. But he isnt a loose plot thread.
Crowleys question to god is more in line with the Edinburgh why start people off on different footings question rather than the free will question. Feels more true to him and his character concerns.
Also we have a compilation at the end and we see Beez and Gab drinking cocktails on Alpha Centari and Muriel studying criminology and Adam becoming a climate scientist and a tribute to Jesus and we cut to Azi and Crow in south downs watching its a wondeful life and theyve started so many charities and maybe they are human or maybe they arent or hopefully theyre something in the middle but either way they keep their memories and then we see them at the Ritz having an extremely alchoholic breakfast and we see Crowley has the most beautiful huge house plant greenhouse and Aziraphale takes him dancing and is so giddy about it and just this once rose everyone lives!!!
this really fucking gets me like all they asked about was why the romantic leads in this romcom didn't have a romantic kiss and they're immediately like ummm you weirdos can get horny about all the sex you think they're having in your own time but we already did "men kissing" and we can't possibly do that again coz it'd just be the same thing (??? how?). like why, when you think about two men who have been in love since the beginning of time possibly sharing a kiss at the end of their love story (like in literally every romantic media out there), is your first thought their sex lives and even if it was sexual why would that be a bad thing. why are we still acting like physical affection between gay couples is somehow inherently sexual. why does noone see how homophobic that is. and most importantly why are we letting people who think like this BE IN CHARGE OF WRITING GAY TV SHOWS
I'm sorry but this was not Crowley fighting for humanity. "Don't bring it back as it was, create a new one" is not fighting for the world he knows. The humans he knows. Where is the belief in us. The belief that humans are flawed but find goodness and kindness anyway. That despite Heaven and Hell being against them they still prevail. Where is the hope.
Some thoughts on why Good Omens S3 felt so disappointing from a queer theory perspective; major spoilers below the cut:
I wanted to organize my many scattered thoughts after watching the new season today, and try to put my finger on just what made the finale so disappointing as a queer story.
I find Aziraphale and Crowley to be queer in four major ways:
1. Most obviously, they are both male-presenting beings in love with each other.
2. They are magical/incorporeal beings that canonically lack human gender.
3. They actively work to counter the dominant systems in control of their lives to forge their own way forward (especially Crowley).
4. Their story spans countless times and places, weaving through different eras of history and prehistory and defying linear time.
In order to explain points 3 and 4, I'm going to perform the classic trick of pulling out Jose Esteban MuĂąozâs Cruising Utopia. Part of Cruising Utopia examines the concept of queer time, which MuĂąoz characterizes as a time that is never fully arrived at due to its constant diversion from the status quo (which, of course, changes throughout time, rendering the queer experience ever-striving). Queer time is a continual process with no possible end, but one that is nonetheless carried out with hope and care despite its impossibility. It dovetails neatly with the philosophy of positive absurdism where, despite the chaos and cruelty of a random universe, the best thing to do is live anyway with all the love and kindness you can. This is a theme that is incredibly prevalent in Terry Pratchettâs parts of the Good Omens book, specifically the storyline of Adam coming into his powers as the Antichrist.
Adam is constantly cajoled by a thrum of deep voices goading him to start the world afresh. The world is rotten and falling apart, they tell him. The only thing to do is destroy it all and rebuild it in your own image. Itâs a selfish outlook, and one that is incredibly easy to fall into as humans with limited time on Earth. Thereâs no shame in having this outlook as far as Heaven and Hell are concerned. But Adam resists with Aziraphale and Crowleyâs help, insisting that the connections he has with his friends and family and the inherent messiness and complexity of humanity is precisely why the world should remain the way it is. Itâs a really beautiful sentiment (and a very Pratchett one). If we all gave in to apathy about changing the world and loving those around us, then we wouldnât be living much of a life at all. In encouraging Adam to make his own human choices, regardless of what Heaven and Hell (the status quo) want, Aziraphale and Crowley demonstrate a queer ethos and an alignment with queer time. They may never see humanity fully at peace, but they can do their best to shepherd them on that quest.
When God gives them the âchoiceâ to remake the world in S3, it doesnât feel like much of a choice at all. Throughout the book and the previous two seasons, Heaven and Hell are depicted as overstuffed, underperforming bureaucracies who often arenât aware of their own goals due to the indecipherable power structures. All they seem to be concerned with is sticking it to The Enemy. There are some occasional scenes where they are seen punishing humanity, but never on a scale strong enough to show that theyâre actually good at their job of policing human morality (and itâs almost always to prove their cruelty to each other, like when the story of Job ends up being a bet between the two organizations to see whoâs truly the best. Humans are just collateral in this eternal beef). When Aziraphale and Crowley opt to âremakeâ the world without Heaven and Hell dictating human actions, it feels like a foolâs errand. Heaven and Hell were never effective in policing humanity previously, and so it doesnât change much when they are erased at the end of S3.
Additionally, by doing this, Aziraphale and Crowley abandon their pursuit of queer time, no longer fighting against the status quo and essentially giving themselves up as sacrificial lambs. Itâs admirable that theyâre willing to be on each otherâs side so much that they will cease to exist, but it also means that their millennia-long pursuit of shepherding and loving humanity comes to an end. Itâs a really hard pill to swallow for me, personally, and I feel like I canât pass informed judgement on it with how short the scene was and with how out of character they both acted. (Itâs extra heartbreaking to have them decide to do this under an apple tree and then never delve into the significance of that.)
The issue of there being no kiss is a really nuanced one. As someone on both the aro and ace spectrums, Iâm all for different expressions and explorations of what love can be. Aziraphale and Crowley are really interesting characters for this since they arenât human, and have been confirmed to be asexual/sexless beings. I enjoyed the novelty of the finger kiss, especially since Aziraphale has so many Victorian dandy-esque tendencies that could understandably lend themselves to such a gesture of affection. However, it felt incredibly flat and narratively unfulfilling for a few reasons.
Firstly, while there was potential for exploration of how an angel and demon might show their affection for each other in contrast to two humans, that was sadly never shown. Their love story was intentionally paralleled with a human one (Nina and Maggie in S2), so there was every reason to expect that they would mimic human social customs after living among them for so long.
Secondly, it perfectly encapsulates a major issue I have with the finale, which is that it is clearly a well-meaning story made by allies, but one that lacks any true queer substance. The finger kiss and hand holding happened without Aziraphale ever apologizing for his patronizing attitude towards Crowley and without him ever explicitly telling Crowley that he loved him. God states that They were always amused by Aziraphaleâs love for Crowley ever since the Beginning. Aziraphale states that with Crowley, he was complete, but that that was taken away from him after Crowleyâs Fall. All of this dialogue is clearly meant to be unassailable proof of their love for each other, especially when combined with the millennia of acts of service for each other. However, it doesnât actually delve into the heart of their love, and fails to give it proper substance. The screenplay is content to let the audience know that Aziraphale and Crowley love each other without actually showing us a moment where the two explicitly verbally confirm it. Again, this could be interesting if the angle of a queer connection outside of human customs was explored, but since that isnât delved into, the confirmation of their love ends up feeling rushed and unsure (and it never comes straight from their own mouths, which feels incredibly disappointing). Itâs yet another instance of an issue that has cropped up in recent years now that queer media is more mainstream, which I like to call Being Gay Is Fine As Long As You Donât Do Any of That Kissing Stuff.
Rachel Talalay, the director of this season, said in an interview that she, Michael Sheen, and David Tennant felt that showing another mouth-to-mouth kiss would have âthe same or lessâ impact as the one in the S2 finale. Complete mismatch of stakes aside, this quote shows a fundamental misinterpretation of how to depict queer intimacy. Talalay says in the same interview that âthey [the fandom] desperately want [a kiss], and they can write their whole sex scenes in fanfic.â In doing so, she equates showing a queer kiss or makeout scene with sexual activity, and subconsciously reveals that she feels that such queer intimacy is too âon the nose.â This feels to me like a clear watering down of queer desire in the service of what allies feel to be âmore meaningfulâ â aka These People Really Love Each Other (We Promise!) But Not Enough To Kiss Onscreen (Donât Be Ridiculous). Itâs a sort of unintentional infantilization and refusal to let queer couples stand on common ground with straight ones. (You never hear this kind of thing being said about cishetero couples.) This stings even more because she, Sheen, and Tennant are demonstrably great allies to the queer community, but this interview shows the fundamental disconnect between well-meaning allyship and true, firsthand queer experience (whatâs that Crowley said about the road to Hell?). Iâm in no way saying that anyone on this show had malicious intent, but the subtext of the season and cast/crew interviews is still very telling of the storytellersâ biases.
This is carried even further by choosing to reincarnate Aziraphale and Crowley as humans. In gaining corporeal, human forms, the queer significance of their nonbinary, magical forms is stolen away from them. The millennia of queer time they spent arguing and questioning and striving and laughing together is erased, and they are sentenced to a few linear decades of marriage, looking feebly up at stars they once created. I wonât lie and say that it wasnât touching to see an older gay couple have a meet-cute resulting in marriage onscreen. Itâs true that thereâs a beauty in the fact that theyâll find each other in every universe â but we only see two of those universes, and they wonât get to live in the one they helped create and cherish together. If thatâs the case, then whatâs the point? (And fuck that nightingale!!)
If you got this far, thank you so much for reading! I definitely have many more thoughts about the finale, but those are all the ones that pertain to specifically queer theory and queer themes throughout the show. Iâd love to hear what others have to say, whether you agree with my points or not! (But of course please be civil. I donât pretend to speak for every queer person. Variety is what makes us so beautiful after all!) Iâm really bummed that this is how the show ended after years of waiting, but it does provide interesting insight into how queerness is portrayed in pop culture and viewed by society at large, for better or for worse.
well there's a tv show out there that's about how destroying either the entire world or even just some people and making new things to replace them isn't a solution and is actually an extremely terrible thing to do you might have heard of it it's called good omens
Disclaimer: I am not saying that mine is better, this is just how I would do it bc i like to write
WARNING YAPFEST!!! ITS LONG I REWROTE THE WHOLE MOVIE!!
Okay, we start off pretty much the same.
Aziraphale is in heaven having the worst time dealing with bullshit from mean ass angels (and Muriel <3)
meanwhile Crowley is having sadboy hours on earth, giving up his bentley for the bookshop everything sucks
All hell breaks loose when Jesus, looking for a semblance of a life he's lost, waffles off to earth and finds Crowley.
Crowley, despite being drunk as fuck, sobers up and has a "AAAH GABRIEL" moment bc hey i know you i havent seen u in 1700 year- JESUS??????
Meanwhile Aziraphale is trying his damndest to keep everything afloat and stick to his vision. But the only ones hearing him out are Muriel, and surprisingly... Michael.
Crowley is dragged to hell and asks if he knows the bullshit goin on in heaven and Crowley is like "dunno don't care" but inside he's shitting bricks bc Jesus is literally on earth eating cheesy bread and the demons are asking where tf he is.
meanwhile, Aziraphale is slowly being manipulated by michael into following a plan of their own, BUT!!! Aziraphale is a bit smarter and happens to keep suggesting things that move back with his Happy World plan. Michael, every time, has a moment of "... of course (:" but all of aziraphale's plans keep ending in "Coincidental" failure because of "Convenient coincidences" (Its michael you know i know we all know)
Muriel, being Aziraphale's emotional support angel (and lowkey exposition) Tells Aziraphale to ask for Crowley's help, but Aziraphale is hesitant.
Meanwhile, the archangels are watching Michael's downward spiral and they are all getting concerned. They go to the metatron for help but wouldn't ya know it? HES GONE.
Back on earth, Crowley is taking care of Jesus and taking him to his little gambling ring and Jesus manages to learn his lesson there, and manages to help Misty to the point where she helps them win against her father.
Aziraphale finally gives in to ask crowley for help when the Book of life goes missing as well as the fuckin metatron
Crowley ofcourse is not easily swayed into helping. It takes Aziraphale getting his bentley back (in the crossword scene bc i genuinely laughed so hard at that) to have crowley CONSIDER a chance. Meanwhile, jesus, after helping Misty, is now off wanting to help more people like he did all those years ago. Aziraphale and Crowley catch up with him and hijinx ensue.
All the while, Michael is spiraling further into mania as they call their connections in hell, Dagon. Dagon and Michael have a lil Toxic Yaoi/Yuri moment as they discuss, through begrudging tolerance, that the end times are afoot and that it can't be stopped.
Uriel walks in on Michael and Michael banishes them in a fit of mania. Camera pans out to show that the same has happened to Sandalphon. Muriel, terrified as FUCK runs to saraquiel. Saraquiel tells Muriel to run to Aziraphale to warn him of Michael's Manic Episode (... manic season...)
As the ineffable idiots help Jesus navigate the world, they slowly remember their their time as godfathers and it makes them reminisce. Through Jesus's Hijinx, we get to see them growing closer again as they are reminded why they fell in love in the first place; Their mutual love for humanity.
Aziraphale finally tries to explain to Crowley that he was just trying to save the humans he loves so much, but realized that Crowley was right about Heaven and its angels being flawed beings as well who also needsd guidance. Aziraphale thought he could provide that.
Crowley explains that its not easy to just forget about how pushed aside he felt, how unimportant and overlooked he felt when Aziraphale would dismiss his concerns thinking that he, like he was as an angel, was having his suggestions and questions ignored or punished
It doesn't solve there as Aziraphale's mind is still set on saving heaven and Crowley knows this, but its a step in the right direction.
all the while jesus is paralelling them as he preaches forgiveness and calls out to those of soho london who are lost, afraid and weary.
Just then, Muriel runs down and is saying that they know where the Book of life is, and that its being abused by Michael.
Before C and A can react properly, a whole chunk of land disappears and Jesus is like "??? did i do that????"
Now they need to find michael. They go to heaven and ask saraquiel but well.... it seems Michael got to them first.
So they go to hell and we get Aziraphale and Muriel's silly demon forms as Crowley stays behind with jesus.
While muriel and aziraphale are doing their silly moment (and i self-indulgently add eric and muriel interacting) Crowley and Jesus finally speak. Jesus talks about the past and how much he misses his friends and how mean the angels were. crowley talks abouy how the humans were mean too, why did jesus forgive all of them?
Jesus said that it wasn't easy but that at the end of the day he believes in humanity. That if he himself is human and feels love and goodness, that all humans must feel it too.
Crowley ponders this as another chunk of land disappears.
We get to see Michael traveling the galaxy, wide eyed and manic as hell, mumbling about the greater good and the plan and Gabriel's "betrayal" and Aziraphale's "incompetence" and how if they were the one to take down Satan then they could do it again that this was always meant to happen it says so in the book, this is god's plan it HAS to be? It doesn't matter if God hasn't spoken in millenia this is the right way!
Michael and Aziraphale will parallel eachother in trying to do the "right thing" but unfortunately leaving pain and destruction in their path to do so
Eventually the conversation with the Demons leads to the flashback of the war in the center of the universe with the eternal flame at the core. The flame looks different, you can see a bunch of flaming swords surrounding it indicating that this is where they were all forged.
Michael, walks up to the flame, and drops a bunch of pages in their wake. Each page that falls causes another catastrophe, but they don't disappear until Michael burns it, using the flaming sword from Aziraphale.
Michael drops aziraphale's sword into the pit and the eternal flame comes to life again. Michael keeps chanting prayers and God's name and the plan as they cry about how this is it, all of it was for God, how they were loyal and that only they can save God's plan.
Crowley and Aziraphale HAUL ASS towards the center of the universe, while Muriel and Jesus spend time on earth. Muriel helps Jesus around and Jesus slowly starts performing his own Miracles to help the humans escape the chaos.
Ineffables get to Michael who is on the final brink of sanity. They have several voices talking to them and they are in Pain and crying about to throw the book of life into the fire, aziraphale and crowley slowly try and calm them down and hand the book over. It almost works, until Aziraphale says that damn "I forgive you" line. Crowley looks up in shock and pain as Michael breaks again.
Michael yells about how they were the only loyal angel to God's plan and that the others should be the ones begging for forgiveness. They hold their head in pain as all the knowledge and voices yell at them to stop this and that they know something is wrong but Angels don't have free will and intellect so Michael just writhes in agony as they finally shatter and slam the book into the fire.
In a moment of desperation, Crowley pulls out the bookshop's page, as Muriel pushes Jesus into the bookshop recognizing the signs and hoping that the bookshop being a sanctuary will help. Wrong idea but it works!
The Bookshop is the only thing that remains as Aziraphale and Crowley, with nothing left to do, have the conversation about their relationship. Aziraphale asks for Crowley's forgiveness, but crowley still feels conflicted. He instead asks Aziraphale what he would do now that they have nothing.
Aziraphale instead replies that he would wait til crowley is ready. Even if it takes another 6000 years. Crowley pauses, contemplates, and then a stack of books falls
and there's Jesus. Standing there not knowing what to do.
They talk and ask Jesus how he got here, and Jesus is just as confused. Without warning, Satan (who has been perusing) explains that since this is the end of everything, they must hold onto anything.
Satan talks to Aziraphale and Crowley and Jesus and explains some things. Aziraphale starts to piece togethrr that crowley joined with satan because no matter what, satan had an answer for every question asked.
Satan has a silly moment introducing himself as Jesus's weird Uncle Brother??? and Jesus is taken aback. All of them are.
Satan, while a bit of a presence, feels just as human and grounded as the four of them do.
Satan admits that the war was truly for naught and that all he wanted to do was to prevent humans from suffering (I READ THE BIBLE I KNOW THE REAL REASON LUCIFER FELL) But went about it wrong.
Pride got the best of him, thinking that he could make a better world over God and soon it overtook him and his cause, which lost them the war.
Now they are stuck in the void here, awkwardly not knowing what to do, surrounded by blank books and the void.
Finally, crowley asks again, if it were possible to finally call upon God for some answers. Not like there was a hell to banish him to or a heaven to fall from.
Satan and Jesus look at Crowley and say that not even they have heard from God in a hot minute. The last person to talk to God in that room, was aziraphale. 6000 years ago.
Aziraphale prays to God and asks forgiveness, and everyone wonders why until he brings out his flaming sword. That he lied to God and that he just wanted to protect thr humans.
God startles them all saying "I knew. But I have a feeling that you already know that."
The ending plays out much like the original. God dodges questions while Satan answers them with vagueness. Finally, God gives them the choice.
Crowley and Aziraphale talk about humanity, and how there is so much good that can come from the angels and even the demons, if they just gave earth and humanity a chance.
But as they are about to make a decision, Jesus pipes up and asks Crowley if he could have an apple from the tree they are standing by.
crowley has a sense od deja vu as he asks jesus if thats really what he wants. Jesus says that there can't be harm in a little apple, and Crowley begs to differ. As he does though, Jesus takes an apple regardless and takes a bite.
Aziraphale is absolutely horrified but intrigued. Jesus says that he honestly ought to thank Crowley for making the humans what they were. Humans were nothing without free will and intellect, and that the apple was what truly made their souls.
Jesus then tells the two that they don't need to make a decision, because he has already made one.
Just like before, Jesus will sacrifice himself to bring the humans back. To give the angels, demons and humans all a chance to take a bite from the apple tree.
They go back and Jesus talks to his mother. He wants to save humanity at the cost of his life once more. Satan scoffs and asks him if he's serious, and makes a joke about how he's never allowed to live past a certain age isn't he?
But Jesus has made up his mind. He holds up a souvenir that he got from misty earlier in the movie and holds it close, saying that Crowley and Aziraphale were right and that humanity will always be worth it.
In the end, we get a sequence of Michael walking out of Heaven's elevator to join the angels and demons at a restaurant as Muriel is teaching Eric how to drink tea with saraquiel rolling their eyes.
Dagon and Uriel speak and sandlphon miracles a napkin to wipe off some crumbs from his shirt. Michael sits by them and awkwardly says hello, and they all stare pensively before offering them an apple tart and smiling.
the metatron serves a grilled cheese to the person Jesus had taken it from earlier and we see Misty sitting with them and helping her father into a seat with a cane.
Finally, we pan to the Ritz, where Aziraphale and Crowley are dining, finishing up a meal before walking to Berkley square. They sit on their bench, and look up at the evening sky. Aziraphale talks to crowley about how beautiful the stars really are and how much of an artist he is. Crowley interjects with a prod about being too sappy. Aziraphale apologizes snarkily, and Crowley, suddenly very sincere says that he forgives aziraphale.
Aziraphale, misty eyed, looks to crowley as Crowley takes his hand.
Later in south downs, we see them starring at the night sky and we FINALLY GET THAT KISS. A nightingale sings
as the camera pans out to reveal Jesus, sitting in a bookshop, writing "The End" on a once blank Book before closing it, looking around and smiling at the blank books he will fill.
I really thought that Aziraphale and Crowley were going to rewrite the Book of Life.
I really thought they were going to become the Illustrator and Author.
I really thought that's why all the books in the shop were made blank.
I really thought God wasn't going to actually exist in a true form, and instead be a kind of omnipresent power of creation.
I really thought that they were going to have their forced-proximity-making-up-with-each-other as they were required to work together to write the new Book of Life.
I really thought that they were going to choose *their* humanity and not a new one.
I really thought they would still be themselves at the end.
I really thought the moral of the story was that the humanity they had was worth protecting, and that life itself (whether mortal or otherwise) was beautiful and inherently important.
I really thought this story was about a love that transcends.
I understand the path they took. However. I do think it missed the mark on what the show was really trying to say.
apparently somehow even my absolute joke prediction of "what if jesus and the antichrist end up gay dating" ended up being true. i should've fucking predicted craz making out sloppy omfg
I just think that the versions with all the trauma, suffering and history deserved a happy ending. I donât think the take away should be that the only way to get a happy ending is for those things to have never happened to you.
the problem isn't âthey didnât get the ship moment I wanted.â the problem is thematic incoherence.
season 1 and 2 kept hammering the idea that individual lives matter. not replaceable copies. not "close enough." actual people, with continuity and memory and history. Crowley and Aziraphale repeatedly chose imperfect, messy existence over grand cosmic plans. so ending with "the universe gets reset and everyone is replaced by alternate versions" isn't just horribly depressing. it's philosophically backwards. like the story literally abandoned its own argument in the final act.
the Job parallel especially points that out pretty cleanly. The whole emotional weight there was: replacement children are not the same children. new children (even if they had, by some chance, looked and acted Exactly The Same) doesn't fix the tragedy of losing the original children. that mattered to them. so yea, this ending feels less like "hopeful transcendence to tear down The System" and more like âcongrats on your happy ending! everyone is dead, but the cottage is cute!" bold creative choice ig. like serving tea with eccles cakes after detonating reality.
my frustration is basically: the story spent years arguing that personhood matters â memory matters, continuity matters, these exact souls matter. and then solved the finale with a cosmic reset that wipes out the very identities the narrative taught us to care about. very much like the nuclear apocalypse they were trying so hard to prevent. it goes against the very thing Crowley was staunchly opposed to during The Flood. against everything they did in the Job minisode. against literally the entire Jim/Gabriel narrative, about Jim not really being Gabriel without his memories. and also, to quote Crowley, "the angel you knew is NOT me."
"but they found each other again! we got them back at the end!" no we didn't. that is NOT them. and to say that they are is kind of insulting tbh. they LOOK similar and maybe have some of the same interests, but just bc a blonde and a red head are into books and astrophysics doesn't make them THEM. their memories, their history, everything they went through together and fought for, the experiences that shaped their characters, those 6000+ years â that's all GONE.
Also. people keep saying stuff like "it was the only right choice" as if there were only two horrible choices? if the story introduces negotiation and moral choice, we'll naturally start imagining alternatives. once âGod offers optionsâ enters the chat, people will obviously ask, âwait. why was this the chosen solution?â when they could've gone for idk, literally anything else. God literally offered to put things back as they were. they could've chosen to have THAT universe, THAT world âTHEIR worldâ put back into place and then added their own conditions to tear down Heaven and Hell. they could've chosen to keep their memories. they could've chosen to make everyone human from then on if that's what the writers were so hellbent on. they could've chosen to make God erase her own memory for all i care idfk. but this ending feels like a bad consolation prize.
after EVERYTHING they did, and everything they went through, they deserved SO much better than this. THE WHOLE WORLD did.
New Earth isn't Earth. a Michael Jackson impersonator isn't actually Michael Jackson. The Other Mother isn't the real mother. those new people aren't their original selves. and whoever those guys are at the end are not Aziraphale and Crowley.
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