[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[speciesofleastconcern]

[guerrillatech]

[callmeirony]

False i joined the military so i didn't end up with half a mil in medical debt like my parents

[magicalsapphiccranberry]

[bunjywunjy]

Bunjy, do you have any fun/cursed facts about sturgeon? They are my favourite fish

sturgeon are probably responsible for most of history’s “lake monster” sightings around the world! these giant fish do sometimes cruise around just under the surface, and from a distance their primordially scaly spines can look like some kind of fantastical serpent, or something. 

“STAY OUT OF THE WATER”

these freshwater fish are generally huge, sure, but some individuals have been recorded as north of 20 feet long, which is frankly ridiculous.

add that to the fact that a single sturgeon can live for more than a century and you’ve got a lake-monster hypothesis!

(or sometimes “jesus christ how did a shark get into the Great Lakes?”)

[sirius170103]

Holy fucking Jesus, that thing could eat me whole and still have room for dessert!

[bunjywunjy]

WELL LUCKILY(?) FOR YOU, sturgeons of all sizes are bottom feeders that rely on a diet of shellfish, crustaceans, and tiny fish that they vacuum up out of the muck. they don't even really have teeth- a sturgeon couldn't bite you even if it wanted to.

and when I say "vacuum" I am, perhaps, speaking more literally than you are comfortable with! behold, the mouth of the sturgeon:

they literally just cruise along the bottom and Hoover up anything remotely edible that seems like it might fit in their face! HUGELY uncomfortable to look at, but not dangerous.

*muffled wet slurping noises*

yessirree, if a sturgeon wanted to do you in it would have to resort to beating you to death with its mighty tail, like god intended.

(which might happen if you try to harass a big one! these things have a SEVERE amount of muscle, and a sturgeon legally can be counted as a blunt weapon)

sploosh

[theunknownosworld]

💜🌻💜

[mycroftrh]

catholic guilt vs protestant belief in your own inherent superiority, fight

[mycroftrh]

wait no I just remembered a few hundred years of history I take this post back

[seravph]

2012 was such an insane cultural moment

[seravph]

no but for real . Gangnam style call me maybe riptide we are young . lana releases her first album and changed pop forever . Frank ocean releases his first album . 1D premieres . grimes releases genesis . and the movies. don’t even get me started. the first avengers movie the last twilight movie hunger games the hobbit les mis. like them or hate them they were cultural phenomenons. minecraft was at its peak before it was deemed cringe and before the minecraft renaissance. 2012 was one of the last good years of youtube too . and everyone was rlly into moustaches for whatever reason

[log4]

Party Rock Anthem, Payphone, Glad You Came, Don’t You Worry Child, and Limbo all dropped in 2012 and we’re talking about Grimes??

[log4]

And that’s not even talking about the charts… Somebody That I Used to Know, Call Me Maybe, Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You), We Found Love, Starships, and that’s just in the top ten

[homonormative]

On top of all of this there was that whole thing about the world ending in 2012…the frantic energy of it all

[thiccxseas]

No offense summer, but 🖤🎃🍂🕷🔮🕸🌙👁🦇🔪👣⚰️💀🖤🕷🎃🍂🕸🌙👁🦇🕷💀🖤🎃🎃🎃🖤🕷🕸⚰️🦇👁🖤💀🕸🌙🍂⚰️⚰️⚰️🔮🍂🍂🍂🔮🔮🎃🖤🖤🕸💀👁🔪👣💀🖤🍂🎃 🕸💀👁🔪💀🖤🍂🎃🔮🕸🌙👁🦇🕷💀⚰️🖤🕷🖤🕸🔮🕸🌙🦇🕷🎃👣💀🍂🖤💀🕷🕷🌙🌙🎃🍂👣🍂🕸🌙👁🎃🎃🦇🎃💀🔮🕷🌙

[oswald-privileges]

Today on 'tumblr is Perfectly Functional With No Flaws Whatsoever'

so i know we're all going wild over TumblrPremiumPlus or whatever the fuck but ive made a new discovery about the r//a///yba//n/s scam (or new to me) and since i spent the time i should have been writing up my thesis proposal doing Tumblr Science instead, i have to at least write it down

so my datemate got an IM from someone asking what 'the sunglasses scam' was. That's in quotes bc the specific phrasing will be significant later.

my datemate replies with a message more or less along these lines:

"The sunglasses thing was about a bot that would hack accounts. Once it had access to an account it would make a post about Ray-Ban sunglasses and if you clicked the link in the post it'd hack you too."

Ey hits enter, but the message won't send. Not unusual, we all know that tumblr IM wil just randomly glitch out when it feels like it. So ey hits refresh, and abruptly finds emself on the log-in page.

"Hi! It's time to change your password!" the log-in page says.

My datemate is naturally suspicious about unexpectedly being asked to alter eir password, but, since ey practises basic cybersecurity and actually uses different passwords for every site, ey figures there won't be too much risk. Ey resets eir password, logs back in, and types out the message to eir friend again.

Same thing happens. Message won't send, ey's booted back out to the log-in page, and told to change eir password again. So ey do.

The third time this happens, ey figures something has to be wrong with the message. I've been watching over eir shoulder for a couple of minutes at this point, so we do a bit of Sciencing to work out what the fuck is going on.

Hypothesis: Tumblr IM is, for some reason, flagging mentions of ray-ban.

Experiment: I send various ray-ban related words and phrases to my datemate via IM. If any of them refuse to send and I get kicked out on refreshing, we've found the culprit

Results: "ray-ban" is fine. "sunglasses" goes through no problem. the precise phrase "ray-ban sunglasses" gets me drop-kicked to the log-in page like i was trying to start a fight in a nightclub (or so i assume. ive never actually been out clubbing)

I do a bit of fucking around on text posts with that phrase to see if that achieves the same effect.

I even tried recreating the original scam post as close as i can get without linking to a malicious website.

not a peep. i stay happily logged in.

so.

tumblrs solution to the ray-ban bots issue

was to blacklist the exact phrase "ray-ban sunglasses"

in the IM feature only

making it impossible

to TELL anyone

who uses the goddamn IM feature

about the goddamn scam

W E B B E D S I T E

[glennisthemenace-deactivated202]

why do bat eared foxes look like they're being bullied ,,,,

[blackestbileandsmoke]

Same creature

[homo-sex-shoe-whale]

Freddie Mercury was the peak of gay big dick energy. Once during a Queen concert a guy shouted a gay slur at Freddie and he responded by having the venue shine a spotlight on the guy and saying "say that again darling". That is literally the biggest power move in history. That man must've left the corporeal realm because how tf do you come back from that

[expressions-of-nature]

by Diana Spatariu

[lanturn-left-this-blog-deactiva]

The person I reblogged this from is someone I enjoy seeing on my dashboard.

[guerrillatech]

[frogcoded]

i understand the whole “it’s offensive to ask a woman if she’s on her period just because she’s nervous” thing but i also think we should start saying more that yes, periods can in fact make you tired and nervous (and you’d be nervous too if you were going on about your daily activities while bleeding and battling with cramps) and maybe instead of making an unfunny joke about it you should try to be more sympathetic towards someone who’s clearly having a difficult day for reasons outside their control. like idk i think i should be able to say “yeah today i’m super tired because my period just started” the same way i’d say “yeah i’m super off today because i slept badly / have a headache / whatever” and have guys just go “okay fair” instead of acting either like i said the most icky and disgusting thing ever or like it’s okay to make an unfunny sexist joke about it

[whitepeopletwitter]

[tottosgreatadventure]

[petfinder-names]