Local Psychward Clown

AJ, NB, 30. Fruity heart, spicy mind, hinky body.

[draconym]

I started titrating down my dosage of antidepressants and now I have tinnitus and cry at the movies.

[localpsychwardclown]

So... Yesterday my lovely mother essentially told me that it's was an absolute inconvenience the fact that I miss a lot of phonecalls because I just keep falling asleep. Which, ok, I can see that might be infuriating. However, when you have not 1 but 2 motherfucking chronic illnesses that make you at very high risk for heat exhaustion and psychosis, as well as prone to pain flares, and all of those REQUIRE medication that, you guessed it, MAKES YOU SLEEPY, telling me my FUCKING PERMANENT state of exhaustion is aggravating, well......

I'm sorry my LIFELONG disabilities that make it practically impossible to keep a job and function have inconvenienced you. It must be very difficult indeed.

I kept quiet actually. I knew that if I answered I would have said things she's light years away from therapy to understand. But was very VERY close to saying "sorry it's inconvenient to you, it must be indeed frustrating but don't worry about it, cause if my mental and physical decline go any faster and the heatwaves get more frequent, I won't be here for long anyway, so no worries!"

I love my mom. But she makes me a little suicidal sometimes.

[fairycosmos]

you literally have to unironically listen to some shit like party rock anthem so you don’t kill yourself

[ominous-signs]

Official ominous sign

[localpsychwardclown]

I know

[thisaliennerd]

chronic pain diagnoses are all like yeah we don't know what this is or why it happens. we also don't know how to treat it. good luck out there soldier

[zombiezinmydreams]

[null-and-void-and-gone]

me when my disabilities disable me:

[trans-axolotl]

new updated drive with psych abolition resources! it’s sorted into folders for specific subtopics for things like harm reduction, different types of support, disability justice readings, mad liberation zines, etc. it’s not complete yet—there’s a bunch more resources I want to add once I’m at my laptop again but wanted to share now!

[mycptsdstory]

Found on reddit. Absolutely true

[infinitystation]

found this at work <3

[localpsychwardclown]

[kosmogrl]

one day I’ll get over it and the lump in my throat when I try to talk about it won’t exist

[i-am-a-fish]

don't be mean to yourself that's you

[i-am-a-fish]

you live there

[localpsychwardclown]

This is who you're being mean to

[goth-queen]

[my-dailydreams]

[my-flying-sister]

I love rebloging. It’s the adult equivalent of showing everyone the cool rock I just found.

[the-dandy-liar]

[pndviews]

“you look depressed” thanks it’s the depression.

[localpsychwardclown]

So how do I tell my shrink that I have better luck handling actual drugs than "imaginary" drugs? Like OTPs being soft and tender with each other, or the profound pain I get when I remember a character's death that came unexpectedly soon, or the immense joy I get with when I find kinship and recognition in a distant universe that feels more than real to me... Like???? I can handle a bad-desition infused hangover on a Tuesday morning and a diet of 5 joints a day wayyyyy better than a little bit of feels at sad hours o'clock