destroy it all and love me in hell

she/her | either 30 or 300 | gay as hell | Beautiful Princess with a Disorder crafting toxic yuri so I dont blow up my own life | terfs and minors DNI

[lonesomelavenderbones]

Hiii tiny queers who live in my phone. There's a bunch of you who don't know me IRL all of a sudden, so I figured I'd make an intro post.

I'm Rory, 36, and the proship profiction prokink sex positive communist lesbian your local republican congressman warned you about. Taboo fiction is fine and good and is not to blame for real world harm.

This blog is my love letter to wlw fiction. It started as a blog for my own toxic yuri, so I could share it more easily. It's since become more of a toxic wlw media analysis blog, but I still post writing here and you can find it under the tag #original fiction.

Thoughts on media I'm currently consuming goes under #liveblogging. General thoughts on wlw fiction go under #i wish lesbians were real. I welcome conversations either in comments on my posts or in my ask box.

Current fandoms

#the locked tomb

#Arcane

And if you're wondering who that is in my banner, read Destroy It All And Love Me In Hell. If you like what I post about here you'll love it.

[kushanna]

Revolutionary Girl Utena | 少女革命ウテナ (1997) dir. Kunihiko Ikuhara

[theatsthetic]

female-presenting vitruvian

[theatsthetic]

i appreciate the amount of people reblogging this despite me not really tagging this at all. im glad many of people feel the same anger i do.

[pumpkel]

Second pride drawing of the month, this time for my favorite accidental trans allegory <3

[evilgirlbat]

girlfriend keeps a kyubey plushie just to beat up when she's angry so sometimes i'm running down the list of questions to ask to help her figure out what would make her feel better and "do you want to hurt kyubey" is often one of them

[canjustdeflecttheemeraldsplash]

[uikangel]

Any ttrpgs that it has played recently and particularly enjoys?

it’s a bit recency bias because it’s actively in the middle of it, but it’s really enjoying armour astir

[lonesomelavenderbones]

Oh fuck yeah Armor Astir shout out

[depsidase]

[shadow27]

[squeakitties]

following weird horny furries who are into shit like pooltoys and transformation and stuff is enrichment. the vitamins and minerals of posting

[squeakitties]

[twinkenjoyer-deactivated2023083]

once you get over your ass and realise you will never get some people and that’s ok you are basically immune to right wing fearmongering. otherkin? none of my fucking business

[stevishabitat]

[mandate-transgenderism]

I must not fall victim to disgust. Disgust is the heart-killer. Disgust is the little-death that brings total apathy. I will face my disgust. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the disgust has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

[sofiiscapitall]

let's put this clear, a man will never be cooler than a butch lesbian

[drtrinitysantos]

[clvelka]

smoking 🚬

[thelastbraincellofthehive]

Did somebody called for a Lovergirl Mira special?

[redstonedust]

its good to acknoweldge the hollowness of revenge but sometimes you really do just need a story about someone who gets hurt and then kills and kills and kills and kills their enemies. its cathartic, babey.

[awesome-chameleon]

"there's nothing that can bring my loved one back, so there's no point in killing you" and "there's nothing that can bring my loved one back, so there's nothing that can save you" are two themes that can and should co-exist

[breelandwalker]

"nothing will ever undo what you did to me, so killing you solves nothing" and "nothing will ever undo what you did to me, but at least i can make sure you won't do it to anyone else" are also themes that can and should co-exist

[tamamoland-with-a-gun]

Even if we've barely interacted at all let alone spoken to one another, you still matter to me, alright? I would still feel your absence, regardless of what form that absence would take.

And frankly, even if you hate and detest me for whatever reason and have done or tried to do things to hurt or even kill me, there's still a thousand reasons i'd rather learn you stopped because of than your death, disappearance, or having moved on to a new target. I'm not under any illusions that it will ever happen with any kind of frequency since it requires a willingness and capacity for introspection, critical thinking, humanization, and kindness that most of you have carved out of yourselves by this point, but I sincerely hope at least some of you come to realize of depths of the pointless misery your actions have helped to spread. Fix your hearts. No "or die". Just fix them, please, or at least do one thing for me, if nothing else, and reflect on how miserable of a person you've become as you hit send on that hateful message you're about to drop in my ask box, alright?

Let's work towards a kinder, gentler future, instead, okay? Even if you've been working against it until now. I won't give up on that, or on myself, or on you. I love you.

[lonesomelavenderbones]

This is outside the normal purview of this blog but does anyone wanna hear how Dilandau Albatou from Vision of Escaflowne is a trans girl metaphor?

[lonesomelavenderbones]

Spoilers for a thirty year old anime under the cut (but seriously its so good you fuckers should all watch it)

Since Dilandau was born as Celena and we know "him" as Dilandau, with the reveal being a weird fantasy version of the old "girl disguised as boy all along" trope, there's clear Gender Stuff at play in the character. On the one hand, it's really easy to just say "it's 90s anime, nobody working on this was thinking about Trans Narratives" and yeah, that's probably true.

Not how my brain works, though.

I used to feel really uncomfortable talking about Dilandau since it sounds a bit like a transmasc de-trans story. You know, born as Celena, brainwashed to think she's a boy, freed from that delusion by her family.

Gross, right? Right.

Except I can't stop thinking about Dilandau Albatou. I've *never* been able to stop thinking about Dilandau Albatou. Why do I vibe so hard with that lil psychopath?

After Donald Trump was elected, a lot of my transfem friends started talking - some in jest, others less so - about detransitioning for safety purposes.

Okay so what if instead of Dilandau being a trans boy who gets to be a little batshit (as a treat), what if she's a trans girl coping with not being able to live as her true self under a fascist dictatorship?

She was able to live openly with her family, as Celena. After being kidnapped by Zaibach all her femininity was stripped from her. Forcibly detransitioned by Zaibach, her psyche crumbled, her only reprieve coming when she enacted violence on behalf of her fascist masters. And so she goes a little crazy (as a treat)

When Zaibach finally fell she was able to go back to being herself, in the loving embrace of the family who accepted her from the start.

Wait, did I just figure out where my mechsplo kink comes from?

[lycanr0t]

comic about determination and hope

part 2