Lorièn

Kit | 20+ | they/he | Queer let the autism consume you

[lorienrobins]

Just gonna make a little post here. Will edit whenever things change.

Current (special) interests and/or hobbies:

Languages & (historical) linguistics

*professor Hidgens voice* “Musical theatre!” (but only specific ones)

Writing, just in general. Joy of my existence (yes, even the actual writing part), keeper of my sanity

Audiodramas (tma, Nightvale, Malevolent, scp: find us alive, The White Vault, Fathom/Derelict, re:dracula, the patient files)

Project Hail Mary

[stuckinapril]

“Do it scared” “do it alone” are all great tips, but my biggest takeaway from therapy is do it messy. This is especially true if you’re getting out of a burnout, which I experience often. Literally just do it messy. You don’t need to pick the perfect trail to walk, the perfect playlist to listen to, whatever the fuck it is. You don’t need to have a meticulous to do list and wake up at the exact time you planned and drink the exact amount of water you planned to drink. Like the biggest thing for people like me to remember is sometimes it’s okay to do it messy. Put on a random yt workout and just get it done in sweats. Do 5 minutes of a daunting task and go from there. Sometimes just getting up is a win during intense burnouts or depressive funks. Literally just do it messy.

[hopelesslydimwitted]

i see a lot of takes where Adrian has mixed feelings / is avoidant of Grace to begin with, but have seen comparatively few takes of GRACE being avoidant. Grace, infamous coward. Grace, explicitly afraid of failure. Grace, who ran from saving the Earth because of said fear. Grace, who (if not aroace) avoided relationships with other humans to avoid getting hurt

i want a Grace who withdraws almost immediately when Adrian doesn’t react the same way Rocky said they would in best-case-scenario (because Adrian is a complex person who’s world has upended when their mate brought home a sick alien). he becomes distant and relies on old habits to be friendly, but not open.

through gritted teeth, he shoos Rocky away so he can go visit or spend time with Adrian. and it hurts every time Rocky takes up his offer, exactly 50% of the time (because Rocky so very carefully wants to give his most special people his attention, equally). Grace doesn’t want it to hurt when Rocky inevitably chooses Adrian over him. when Rocky chooses to go back to a normal life.

when Rocky visits alone, Grace is the same as he’s always been. when Rocky visits with Adrian, he’s the same as he’s always been. he jokes too much, is self-deprecating in ways that Rocky doesn’t recognize, is quick to brush off things that Rocky knows would bother him if it was just the two of them.

he’s got an invisible xenonite wall between him and Adrian, and Rocky can see it. but he can’t do anything about it, because Grace won’t admit that’s what’s happening. Rocky calls him out, asks why he doesn’t like Adrian, asks why Grace won’t come with him on visits. Why is Grace pushing Rocky away, question?

it’s not until Adrian asks that Grace sees how stupid he’s being. Adrian doesn’t ask outright, but they’d noticed that Grace acts differently around them and gets advice from Rocky. Adrian is bigger than Rocky, could Grace be afraid of Adrian, question? is Grace overwhelmed by how alien everything is? so the next time they visit, they’re dressed in soft clothes like what Grace wears and almost crawling across the floor, as small as they can make themselves. Grace thinks it’s a little odd and funny, and asks what they’re doing. Adrian says plainly, Do not want Grace to be afraid of Adrian, statement.

it’s an eye opener for Grace. he’s been so focused on avoiding the upcoming heartbreak that he didn’t see how much he was worrying and hurting Rocky and Adrian. it takes seeing Adrian, a proud and large Eridian, make themselves as small as possible at the chance to connect to him.

finally Grace, who is able to overcome his fear of failure/rejection with how strong his love for Rocky is, opens up. it comes out in choruses and sonatas, how worried he is about disappointing Rocky or keeping Rocky chained to him now that they’re home. Rocky reassured him that Grace is here to stay, so Rocky is here to stay with Grace. (Adrian reassures him that, yes, they have mixed feelings about him, but they are willing to learn who he is. that makes Grace feel so much better than he expected.)

[belleeebelleee]

Thinking that Rocky is going to have to watch Grace die..

Because Grace is human.

He's temporary.

Rocky isn't.

One day, whether it's ten years or fifty, Grace is going to get older. His hair will turn grey. His hands will shake. He'll move a little slower. And Rocky—Rocky will still be Rocky.

The same friend who crossed the stars with him. The same friend who risked everything for him. The same friend who never once hesitated when he needed saving.

And Rocky will notice every change.

He'll notice when Grace needs new glasses. When he starts forgetting little things. When he can't climb stairs as easily as he used to. When he needs help carrying things that used to be effortless.

And Rocky will help him every single time without complaint, because that's what friends do.

But eventually there will come a day when Rocky realizes there aren't many days left.

A day when Grace is old. A day when Rocky understands that this is what humans do.

They die.

And for the first time since they met, there won't be anything Rocky can fix.

No atmosphere problem. No engineering solution. No impossible calculation. No desperate rescue mission.

Just his friend reaching the end of a life that was always going to be far too short.

And Rocky will stay. Of course he will stay.

He'll sit beside Grace until the very end because leaving was never an option.

Because Grace saved Erid. Because Grace saved Earth. Because Grace was friend.

And afterwards, Rocky will have to learn how to exist in a universe where Grace doesn't.

And then one day Rocky would have to tell the story.

"Human Grace. He save Erid. He save Earth. He was friend."

[unicafavorita]

Ryland Grace would have the craziest authors notes. "Hello, guys. Sorry I haven't updated in 11 years I just got sent to space and I didn't know they put me in a coma. Anyway, here's chapter 23. I hope you enjoy :)"

[siriuslystardust17]

I’ve come to the realisation that I am Ryland Grace, Ryland Grace is me

(I’m just nowhere near as smart as he is)

[twentythousandvolts]

early stages of friendship are Soooo embarrassing like yea sorry....... it's me again............ i enjoy talking to you and spending time with you....... you can shoot me point blank if you want i dont mind

[beardedmrbean]

[specialagentartemis]

sometimes I go on Reddit (my first mistake) and come to the car-crash-like realization that a lot of people genuinely think "friend" is the word for "a kind of relationship that is fundamentally and definitionally not deep, close, or meaningful" and any kind of depth or closeness automatically means you are "more than friends" and then I just. get really sad for the state of everything. no wonder the Loneliness Epidemic exists damn

[william-s-churros]

i think i saw a movie like this once

[maidslime]

Ok I needed to know the story and

Guy makes a really stupid decision and gets in a car accident -> no real damage from accident but insurance goes up -> starts beating himself up over his stupid decision -> gets depressed -> starts to realize he's single and had crash been worse he'd die alone -> realizes he's never had a relationship or even a crush and starts wondering what he'd want out of a relationship -> starts to realize he doesn't really like girls so he thinks he must be gay -> realizes he likes girls and boys about the same amount, so he must be bi -> later realizes that "same amount" is none at all -> he's ace

[xiaq]

One of the best things about being a writer is thinking of something small you can add to your work that’s just. Devastating. Like you’re sitting there going. Oh. That would be diabolical. People would get really riled up about that. Exquisite. Let’s do it.

[raspberrybluejeans]

wouldnt it be nice to travel to places with friends. sad that its only something that exists in fiction

[sharkfiinn]

[roboticnebula]

Pros of re-reading your own fic

a good time;

Has exactly the tropes you like and the characterization you want to read;

Gratification: yes you did finish a thing and yes you did do good;

just a very fun time all around.

Cons of re-reading your own fic:

Is that another TYpO

[cloudmancy]

arrested for impersonating grains of rice (NO possibility of parole)

[stealingpotatoes]

i don't know what older adults were on about when they said being a teenager was good <3

[americanfrontier]

oh and when i was a year old, after i got my foot amputated my parents were pushing me around in a stroller at a street festival in miami and i was chewing on my foot or whatever and this street performer came up to us and was like “aw i bet that tastes good!!” and my dad was like “yeah look at what she did to the other one!!!!” and pulled back the blanket covering my left leg to show a stump with a huge scar on it and i’m pretty sure my dad terrified that poor man

[cwudining-deactivated20181015]

A friend of ours worked in a movie theater.  One night, a rowdy little boy decided to kick over all the stands that held up the red velvet cords.

After several attempt to stop him, she finally declared, “If you keep kicking those over, your leg will fall off!”

No sooner had she said this than she looked up and was mortified to notice a man standing on a pair of crutches with one leg.

Before she could apologize, he looked down at the boy and sighed, “I used to love to kick those.”

The kid ran away.