Cape Cod caregiver

Longer lives, chronic conditions: Our world now

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Accessing the code: Medical practice, insurance coverage, and me

Accessing the code: Medical practice, insurance coverage, and me

Call me Yossarian. For three of the last five years, I’ve encountered an apparently unsolvable problem. Three of my annual checkups haven’t been covered by my health insurance. My family medical history indicates risk factors for at least six common, chronic, serious health conditions. My doctors have advised annual screenings. Government and insurance guidelines suggest screenings every two or…

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What have I done for me lately?

What have I done for me lately?

What really matters to you? Are your days spent doing those things that really matter to you? Are you where you want to be in your life? Is your life organized around your values? Are you able to fulfill commitments you’ve made to others–and yourself?

This glorious day began with a trip to the lab for routine annual tests–for me! After I returned, Spouse left for errands and I coaxed Mom into the…

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If I'd known I was going to care this long

If I’d known I was going to care this long

I’d have taken better care of myself. But: I’ve granted myself one indulgence over the years since Dad died. During these years of caregiving for Mom, I’ve allowed myself to eat whenever and pretty-darn-near whatever I wanted. I’m not an emotional eater. Instead, I often experience hunger as a kind of overall diminishment: weakness, sadness or irritability, inability to concentrate. As the…

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Ambulance lessons: Who cares?

Ambulance lessons: Who cares?

First responders tend to be young, or significantly younger than I. They tend to be male, with a few exceptions. They tend to behave calmly, purposefully, and responsively–despite whatever panic, confusion, and pain they confront. My most recent ride in the big red truck with lights flashing and sirens wailing reminded me of the traits and habits I find so admirable in these individuals. They…

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Vicissitudes, redemption, celebration, persistence

Vicissitudes, redemption, celebration, persistence

Another week, another chance to experience the vicissitudes of the caregiving life: examples follow.

Monday: Mom suffered another incident of the mysterious coughing syndrome she’s developed in recent years. Often associated with eating or drinking and accompanied by sneezing, the syndrome has gone undiagnosed by medical professionals. She reported that Monday’s siege was the worst ever. The cure…

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Uncertainty, life, and marathons

Uncertainty, life, and marathons

Have we all had the sensation of time passing quickly, yet slowly? Have you looked back at a time in your life and thought that it seemed like it was just yesterday, yet seemed like it was such a long time ago? That contradictory sense of time has infused my life, especially over the past few years of intensive caregiving. I wrote (Recently, or has it already been a few weeks?) about how doing…

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Certainty, death, and taxes

Certainty, death, and taxes

This was my third year of filing my mother’s tax returns. Doing taxes always forces a review of the previous year. During these past few years, doing Mom’s  taxes has forced me to revisit my father’s death–and life. I’ve had to examine his files for evidence of how he structured their finances and how he handled their taxes. His filing system, using the term loosely, contained every document he…

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Seeking shelter: Caring and real estate What do we need in a home these days? Here's a description, as it might appear in an ad. 

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Fashion backward: Clothes and caring To dress or not to dress? That is the question for people whose days are unlikely to involve leaving the house.

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Springing back to basics: Food and care Winter's end represented a transitional phase for us. The seasons turned and so did our lives, just a bit.

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Old school: New meaning Around here, we're blessed with authentic local media. Our daily and weekly newspapers, though owned by off-Cape enterprises, manage still to have local reporters doing regional journalism.

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Accounting for care: Life plans

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I'm glad I'm old, or: We've got to get organized!

When Mom sees something she regards as crazy or stupid on television, a standard response is, “I’m…

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Super Sunday: A caregiver's version

Dear Reader, this post will be mercifully brief–and not because of I’ll be watching the big game.…

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A sampler of recent ups and downs: The caregiver drag

We’ve been bouncing between opposites on the emotional spectrum as though we’re doing a weird,…

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Glimpses back across stages of caregiving

Caregiving changes as time passes. This is a process that unfolds in stages, each of which has its…

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Moonlighting caregivers: Making madness

Is it better to be a stay-at-home caregiver? It depends, of course. Can the caregiver afford to…

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