Future Grandkid: Grandpa, what was it like when Obama was president?
Me: Aah, yes… the Homestuck President.
what the shit does that mean
I see all of you people who had this post queue’d for 4/13. Good job.
ojovivo
Sweet Seals For You, Always
Peter Solarz
Not today Justin
Misplaced Lens Cap
YOU ARE THE REASON

★

blake kathryn

Discoholic 🪩

Product Placement

Origami Around

ellievsbear

pixel skylines

@theartofmadeline
we're not kids anymore.
AnasAbdin
occasionally subtle
sheepfilms
will byers stan first human second
Monterey Bay Aquarium

seen from France

seen from T1
seen from Bangladesh
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from United Kingdom

seen from Australia
seen from Türkiye
seen from Canada

seen from Austria

seen from Canada
seen from Türkiye

seen from Malaysia
seen from Spain
seen from United States
seen from Spain
@lotorhasabuttcape
Future Grandkid: Grandpa, what was it like when Obama was president?
Me: Aah, yes… the Homestuck President.
what the shit does that mean
I see all of you people who had this post queue’d for 4/13. Good job.
the bear season 3 theory: carmy died in the freezer and this whole season is a dream
I have a Doctor Who theory that’s specifically designed to piss off everyone and unfortunately cannot be contradicted by canon as of yet
Time Lords lay eggs
I still love this theory because you can make a pretty compelling argument in favor of it with points like “it doesn’t make sense for a species that gestates their young internally and gives live birth to be able to spontaneously transform into a form that doesn’t have a womb” and “no reference to pregnant time lords has ever been made in the history of the program” but the only argument against it is “I hate it”
the fact that it's not wrong does not make it right
yes it does
the people tm wanted me to make this
me pondering my kugelblitz
Theory: Shiro is Future Keith
New Voltron theory, as of season 3. Hear me out. Shiro is Keith from the future. Here’s my evidence. First the physical: Obviously Keith and Shiro don’t look physically identical. But Keith is young. He’s a little bit baby-faced (apparently he’s 18, but I think he could pass for 16), and as he matures, it’s not that unrealistic to think that his jaw will square out, his eyes will narrow, and his face will generally look older. Shiro is only 25, but he looks like he could pass for 30. He and Shiro have similar enough coloring. Keith’s mullet is a distraction from their similarities! If Keith had shorter hair, it would be more obvious.
Now for the behavioral evidence. Shiro is clearly more mature than Keith. He’s level-headed and he’s a natural at everything. This is partially due to the age difference, and partially due to the fact that Shiro already knows what’s going to happen before it has happened. How is Shiro able to bond with his lion so much faster than the other paladins? He’s done it before. How is Shiro able to remain calm in battle and cheer on the other paladins? He already knows how the battle will end. He didn’t even react when Keith was revealed to be part Galra. Didn’t even bat an eye. He knew Pidge was actually Katie Holt before anyone else (not just that Pidge is a girl, but Katie Holt specifically. He probably knew Matt Holt had a little sister, but he could have assumed Pidge’s physical appearance was a coincidence, or that Matt had an even younger brother he never mentioned. But he didn’t. He jumped straight to the conclusion of Katie Holt in disguise).
Furthermore, Keith is told that he fights like a Galra soldier. Retrospectively, we assume this is because Keith IS Galra. And, yeah, fine. But, you know who else would need to fight like a Galran? The gladiator champion who fought for the Galran’s entertainment. Throughout all of season 2 Shiro constantly keeps telling Keith that he will need to take over as a leader one day. As the black paladin. This reveals 2 things: first, that Shiro has faith in Keith even though he’s so unstable because he IS Keith. He knows he can do it because, well, he did. Second, Shiro knows that Keith can and will have to take over one day. Because he already saw it happen. He urged Keith on because he knew it would be necessary. The black lion accepts Keith instantly, because he is literally the same person as the previous Paladin.
Other details. Shiro’s amnesia. If it’s real, it doesn’t contradict the theory. Just because Shiro is Keith doesn’t mean he didn’t also get captured by the Galra. But if he’s faking it, well, it would be convenient, wouldn’t it? In order to not reveal too much about his (and therefore Keith’s) past, he fakes not being able to remember. That leaves his background just ambiguous enough that he really could be anyone. Also, how do Keith and Shiro know each other? Their friendship is established as being very strong in the first episode, but it is never explained how or why they know each other. With their age difference, under what circumstances would they naturally meet and become friends? They’re not related, and they wouldn’t have been in school together. It has to be because Shiro knew to seek out Keith specifically, and Keith inherently trusted him because he sensed something familiar about Shiro.
So Keith doesn’t know that Shiro is him from the future. The paladins (who, nowadays, no longer include Shiro) begin to figure out that Keith looks more and more like Shiro as he gets older, but they just think it’s a strange coincidence. Eventually, they come to realize that the kerberos mission was doomed to fail without an experienced member on the team. Matt Holt would certainly have been doomed without Shiro to protect him, and Shiro needed to have experience with the Galra in order to do it. Keith realizes that he was Shiro the whole time, and when he prepares for the Kerberos flight, he assumes the pseudonym of his long time friend and mentor: Takashi Shirogane.
Obama Did Homestuck
As much as we’d like to avoid it, there are some facts we just can’t ignore any longer. There’s some math that I wish didn’t add up, but it does. Take a took:
Homestuck ran from 2009-2016. Now take a look at this.
Obama’s presidency spans across almost the exact same dates. Coincidence? I think not. That’s right, Barack Hussein Obama II, the 44th president of the United States of America, did Homestuck.
I know what you’re thinking. “But Andrew Hussie wrote Homestuck.” You poor fool. That’s exactly what Obama wants you to think. You see, there is no Andrew Hussie.
Hussie. Hussein. Sound familiar? There’s a reason he refused to release his birth certificate.
It took extensive research, but here’s what I’ve pieced together. Obama is the real author of Homestuck, but he was forced to cover it up. Why? It’s simple. Politics.
Let me take you back in time, to early 2009. It’s the beginning of Obama’s first term. Being president is stressful. He needs some kind of release. What does he turn to? A creative outlet. Homestuck.
At first it was good for him. It helped him through his early accomplishments, like singing the Lilly Ledbetter limitations for equal-pay lawsuits, and Obamacare. But then it began to take a toll on his personal life. By day, he was busy with his presidential duties, but by night, he sacrificed his sleep, his family, his very sanity, for Homestuck.
Look at this photo. Does Michelle look happy? Of course not. Her husband is neglecting her. He’s neglecting his children, and everything else that matters to him. Homestuck used to be a stress reliever, but it soon became a source of stress itself.
Look at this photo from before and after his presidency. Look at the toll Homestuck has taken on him.
Now back to Andrew Hussie. Why is this fictional man given the credit for Obama’s hard work? Wouldn’t Obama be outraged? Wouldn’t he want credit for the masterpiece he created? Well you see, Andrew Hussie is a hoax that Obama himself orchestrated all along.
2012 was a tumultuous year. Obama needed to take stock of his priorities. He was expected to run for reelection. He needed a second term. America needed him. But he needed Homestuck. By then, Homestuck had become an unstoppable force unto its own. Obama needed to confront the monster he created.
He needed a scapegoat. Enter Andrew Hussie. Or as he’s really known, a member of Obama’s cabinet.
Let’s take a closer look…
Now let’s take a look at “Andrew Hussie.” Look familiar?
Obama forced this member of his cabinet to take the fall for Homestuck. He may have been using this scapegoat as early as 2010, sending his cabinet member to a fan convention that same year. “Hussie” was even named one of Foreign Policy Magazine’s top 100 global thinkers of 2012. You really a dark horse like “Hussie” could garner that kind of attention? Of course not. It was Obama’s tour de force for which he took the credit. Doesn’t it make more sense that a US president would be a global thinker?
If this seems crazy to you, you’re right. Obama made it seem that way. He couldn’t have a scandal like Homestuck tainting his reelection campaign. He needed “Hussie” to take the hit.
Need further proof? Let’s take a look at the obvious parallels between Homestuck and Obama’s life. Many of the characters bear a striking resemblance to people that Obama would have regularly been in contact with. For example, here’s Mitt Romney.
Look at the smile.
And lastly: McCain.
Later in his second term, Obama had to let “Hussie” take over the writing process. This accounts for the obvious stylistic differences in the later acts. “Hussie’s” long silence, known as omegapause (August 12, 2015 - March 28, 2016), was when Obama officially handed the reigns over to “Hussie.” Obama took this time to focus on the final acts of his presidency, knowing that he was going to be termed out very soon. Everything written after that date was the work of Obama’s puppet.
To me, it’s sad that Obama’s responsibilities as president tore him away from his true passion. I will always wonder what Homestuck might have been if its original author had been allowed to finish what he started.
archie andrews has fought in every american war
This suggests some kind of time traveling Archie Andrews....
I want to Believe
paul atreides is a quirked up white boy, goated with the spice
Update
The NFT of Dorian Gray
Van Eck in Crooked Kingdom be like
you’ve probably seen the jokes about how archie andrews from riverdale went to war, but the producers refuse to say what war it was
but i’m here to tell you that the reliality is stranger than you could possibly imagine unless you watch the show
this is archie’s dress uniform
(the tepia overlay is present every time he wears it, i have not altered the shot at all)
this is archie and his buddy in the trenches, in their combat uniforms
yes I said trenches. that screenshot is from a flashback archie has to a member of his platoon loosing a leg to enemy shells in no-man’s land. (he specifically calls it no-man’s land)
Okay, so it’s WWI. That’s deeply weird, given Riverdale takes place in more or less the present day (there’s a weird amount of old-timey tech, but everyone also has iphones and laptops, so we can assume the old tech is people being retro), but it’s at least an answer
but it gets weirder.
because we know what country archie was fighting in. his deployment was in uzbekistan.
now despite it being called a world war, not every country was involved in the first world war. uzbekistan did not fight on either side.
because the country didn’t formally exist until 1991
so in whatever parrallel universe riverdale takes place in, new york and the town of riverdale exist essentially in the present day, the soviet union has fallen, but former soviet union countries are still fighting a war which should have ended more than 100 years ago.
so that’s bonkers, but i’m not done
in the episode in which archie decides to join the army, the school digs up a time-capsule from the 1940s and opens it. inside is a picture of four riverdale high students who were shipping out to the army the day after the time capsule was burried
the ghosts of these four WWII soldiers then appear to archie, convincing him that he should join up and fight
so to be clear, archie fought in the first world war, in a country which did not exist during the first world war, because he was told to by the ghosts of soldiers from the second world war, a war which could not have happened yet because the first world war is apparently still ongoing
and also it’s the present day and archie owns an iphone
fuck it i need to watch this show
Today is Plankton’s 60th birthday
(this is from the Spongebob pitch packet btw)
jon: *enters the tunnels*
the eye: wait. where’s my boy? WHERE IS MY SPECIAL LITTLE BOY WHERE DID HE GO??? OH MY GOD. I LOST MY FUCKING BOY. JONAH. JONAH ARE YOU SEEING THIS I LOST MY FUCKING BOY. IM A TERRIBLE ELDRITCH PATRON JONAH. ALL THESE EYES. AND I STILL MANAGED TO LOSE MY BOY.
Doctor Who is the only TV pilot to air twice because its first airing was interrupted by the news of the Kennedy assassination