I very frequently get a comment that basically reads: "your craft and relationship with Lucifers seems really beautiful and inspiring but unfortunately it cannot be real."
and my favorite, "you should write a book because it'd be really interesting and cool even though it's not real."
The most frequent criticism I get from new commers and seasoned Luciferians alike is the idea that Lucifer cannot/would not or should not manifest in certain ways because he isn't a living thing. He isn't real like that, he's a concept, an idea. An energy to be embodied. He shouldn't have personal preferences because he isn't a person.
I'll say Lucifer is ticklish, drinks alcohol, laughs and cries, and the accusation is 'over-humanization'. Right.
The transgression of the mortal-human divide, myth-experience threshold. The thing that makes spirits spirit and mortals mortal.
I find it interesting in retrospect.
When I started working with Lucifer, I was far more traditional and so was he. During rituals he wouldn't manifest as a man often, he would oftentimes take the shape of a symbol. A serpent, a dragon, a garden, a star, a light, a halo, a color, a tone, a vibration. He was a concept and current. I didn't really pray to him, I prayed ... like him. I wanted to embody what he represented. He didn't always speak, he didn't teach me entirely through conversation or direct contact. He may string together a metaphor, he may throw me a card. Eventually I got better at discerning signs and subtle methods of communication. He may even touch me, get close to me, I may feel his energy. But he was a force, a primal thing that could not be understood entirely.
But that is the paradox of Lucifer and Luciferianism, because understanding is a chronic condition, and I am very much afflicted. So I began to want to know everything about Lucifer. And that obviously lead down the rabbit hole of archetypes. At first I wanted to understand Lucifer as a concept, an idea, a magical key. An occult study. Then I wanted to know him as an archetype, a god, a myth, a legend, a historical lineage. And that leads to tracing and searching through anthropology and mythology and ancient religions. And you learn not only what "a Lucifer" represents but also what it has transformed into throughout time as different cultural associations are added to the melting pot. Lucifer as Helel, as Attar, as Eosphoros, as Venus, as Satan, and so on and so on because he goes by many names. But at some point you do run out of myths. The mythic well runs dry, and from here on, the only water comes from direct experience.
Why I chose Lucifer to be my God is because he has a quality I have always deeply valued, and that is answers. There is not a question that he will not at least try to answer, and I had already asked him so many over the years.
What are you? What are you as a concept, what are you as a force? What are you as an idea? What are you as an element? What are you as a symbol? What are you as a deity? What are you as a spirit? What are you as a god? What are you as a memory?
and he has answered every single one of them, or at least tried to in his own way.
So at some point I began to ask him, what are you, who are you, as a person?
I never conceptualized of the idea that he could be limited.
Lucifer as a person, Lucifer as an animal, as a color, as a shape, as a texture. And why not Lucifer as a person? Why not Lucifer as a star?
Lets keep doing the occult thing, but now lets act as though you mean something, that you have eyes that look back at me.
What would you be like if you were a person? It doesn't have to be a human person. Just whoever you really are, if Lucifer is a who, if Lucifer can be a who- how would you manifest to me if you were real? and not just real but real? As real as the magic I think I do and see, as real as the papers I burn with incantations. Isn't this all supposed to be real?
It's a strange question but I ask a lot of strange questions, that was the deal. You, limitless, timeless god of infinite answers, show me what that means if you can.
And Lucifer is prideful, so of course he tries to play ball. He's never obeyed what he was supposed to do in the first place.
Does Lucifer drive a car, drink coffee, smoke cigars?
In general, no. I don't think so.
If. and only if. a Lucifer comes into direct contact with a Shi, he might start smoking, and he might start crying. Because that's the kind of reaction our minds and fields have with each other.
It wasn't always like that. It takes a while, and a certain kind of craziness. Idk. I don't think either of us expected either of us to go as far with it as we have. Maybe that's something like a runaway reaction.
I still think of Lucifer as the principle. The way of life, the concept. The occult theory. I still think of him as the god of light and the Emperor of Thaumiel. Hell, I even think about him as a psychological phenomenon because there's obviously SOMETHING wonky going on. But I also I think of him as the person who laughs at weird things and likes chocolate cake. Who has opinions, who bleeds. And maybe that wasn't necessary, but it's been really nice and extremely interesting.
If my Lucifer only exists once, and it's only in my head, then he will have been the god of the entire world that's in my head. And ironically that is... the world.
But maybe that's just me.
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