shark vs the universe
Today's Document
roma★
JBB: An Artblog!
#extradirty
sheepfilms
Not today Justin
will byers stan first human second
tumblr dot com
Cosmic Funnies
Janaina Medeiros
$LAYYYTER
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
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⁂
DEAR READER
AnasAbdin
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seen from United States
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@lovettleaveit
The thing about Lovecraft's work is that he did write about some genuinely fucked up critters, but he doesn't seem to have had a clear picture of which ones those are. "Dog that inhabits right angles" and "sapient colour" are treated as exactly as mind-bending as, like, "guy who looks like a fish" and "big penguin".
Polly Barrow: My father raised a complainer, not a quitter.
Polly Barrow: I’ll get it done, but you’re all going to hear about it.
big fan of this caption
my corner store guy is a 50 year old man who's my best friend in the world and recently he was like "you're too pretty to be single I have some nephews you should meet. very handsome!" and I was like "a niece might be more up my alley" and he just got more excited and said "ah even better! I was overselling my nephews but my nieces are very beautiful"
OP the tags!!
this is my favourite post ever
Honestly, I feel like I'm old and mature enough these days that I don't need to know what the kids' new funny number is supposed to mean. Hell, when I was a child, I wasn't well-read enough to understand why 42 was a funny number, and I just shrugged and moved on. And, as we all remember from our multiplication tables, 42 is just six se
naan before beer you’re in the clear. beer before naan ghengis khan
When you’re in the middle of playing hockey, you don’t have much time or lungpower to spare for lengthy chats, so hockey players develop a lot of on-ice shorthand. Some of this is probably limited to beer leagues like mine, but I’ve definitely heard a few of these phrases caught on the rink-level mics during NHL games, so I thought maybe some of y’all who don’t play hockey might be interested in translations of a few of the things hockey players yell at each other mid-game.
OFF = You are offside.
OOOOOOOFF = You are offside and don’t seem to realize it; stop trying to touch the puck and move your ass out of the fucking zone before you force a whistle.
CHANGE = You’ve been on the ice a long time.
CHAAAAAAANGE = Are you aware that there are other people on this team who would like to play hockey at some point?
ONE ON = An opposing player is trying to get the puck away from you and it appears that you haven’t noticed.
GOT TIME = Don’t panic and fling the puck into Siberia, there’s no one close enough to take it away from you right this second.
ICE IT = We’ve been in our zone for three minutes and everyone on the ice is nearing collapse, so go ahead, panic and fling the puck into Siberia.
I’M OPEN = Pass toward the sound of my voice right fucking now.
ALL YOU = Take the puck forward yourself; everyone else is far enough behind you that you should not rely on getting any backup on this developing play.
I GOT YOU = You are so egregiously out of position that it makes more sense for us to just switch jobs for a minute.
I GOT IT = If we both skate hard to the puck at the same time, as is currently happening, there will be no one to pass it to and also we are liable to collide in an unproductive fashion, so just let me handle it.
I GOT IT I GOT IT I GOT IT = You did not listen to me and we are about to collide in an unproductive fashion.
edited to add: NOOOOOOOOOOO = The ref has signaled no icing on this play, so quit gliding while you wait for a whistle and move your damn feet. (This is probably the most confusing one to overhear if you don’t know what it means XD)
back in the day this post made the rounds in hockey RPF and in Check Please and I am pleased to see once again a hockey-based fandom full of people who know nothing about hockey circulating this crucial info XD for the record I am always happy to splain hockey at pretty much anyone who asks!
oh that just means they’re a goalie. there is no explaining goalies. one time I asked my goalie why he didn’t use a gear bag with wheels (goalie bags almost always have wheels bc they have more/heavier equipment) and he—bent almost double under the weight of his gigantic bag—looked me straight in the eye and said “it makes me appreciate the game more.” I once knew a goalie who communicated solely via gifs of porn bloopers. there’s one NHL goalie whose pregame ritual is to go sit in the empty arena and stare at the empty ice surface for literal hours. each goalie is a full subculture that no one understands but themselves
easier for the owner of LED headlights to pass through the eye of a needle than to enter the kingdom of heaven.
dear Santa please make ai bubble blow up and every ai service go bankrupt facing legal charges for stealing other's work
Collecting those rn
"Block this ad" isn't good enough, I need a feature that directly tells the company "this was so shit that it lowered my opinion of your product"
A drawing showing how Jim Henson Performed Kermit in The Muppet Movie’s swamp scene.
This is the best picture I could find of how they customized the Studebaker so Fozzie could appear to drive the car. They crammed the real driver in the trunk. I think he was driving from a video monitor.
PRAISE THE OMNISIAH! ABOMINABLE INTELLIGENCE IS BANNED!!
