Salty Space Rocks and Hawkeye Squared

25, Non-binary, geek of the highest order, animation and vidja game enthusiast.

[pretentiouslimericks]

It feels like I’ve talked about this before, but to me the funniest version of Portal is if Chell is deaf.

Like, most of the major story beats, at least the ones that directly affect her, have a prominent visual component so she’s following along with the basics. But she has no idea who cave johnson is, or what wheatley was trying to explain to her, and she certainly wasn’t hurt by any of glados’ insults.

but the best part of this headcanon is imagining glados checking chell’s personnel file years down the line, noticing the word “deaf” for the first time, and just going “WHAT???”

[emptyjunior]

Glados learning sign language so Chell can hear at least one of her excellent monologues and Chell just closes her eyes

[junebug-jamboree]

[our-queer-experience]

ive been repeating this in my head all week. auntie likes wearing the strap…….

[bug4932]

lisa felt the need to request no tongue bc her shard told her exactly what taylor did to that poor girl

[ecstasemen]

im developing cataracts in my right eye and ill be getting surgery for it on sunday so art might be paused for a bit next week ...

[butch-witches-deactivated202412]

to help OP out for each day it is healing I will invent a new minion hybrid.

day 1: if a minion and shrek had sex that produced viable offspring

[ecstasemen]

that's okay. you dont need to do that actually

[n1ceratt]

Tragedy Anne

Tragedy Anne is inspired from rodeo clown and She's Miss Fortune's daughter!

[estro-boi]

we gotta get back to torrent distribution, i just watched someone eat eight grand in bandwidth charges because they ran a direct-download piracy site with local file hosting through cloudflare. torrents were invented literally for this exact reason

[estro-boi]

torrents work like this

i have a file or folder on my pc that i want to share with other people. let's call it gayshit.mp3

unfortunately gayshit.mp3 is 750mb and im not paying for discord nitro so i need another way to send it

i put it into qbittorrent and it makes a torrent file. this is essentially a very small file that points to gayshit.mp3 so other computers can find it. kinda like a treasure map

i send this tiny file to my friend, who loads it into qbittorrent. their computer takes a moment to find mine over the vast expanse of cyberspace and then (as long as my pc is running and the file is still where it should be), it gets copied from my hard drive to theirs

this is the cool part: if somebody else loads that tiny file, they can download it from both of us. if i'm offline but my friend is on, the third person can still get it. this also means that if two people have separate halves of the file, they can download the other half from each other. as long as some combination of people have the pieces between them, they can all have the whole thing.

crucially this does not require a server!!! you can just upload the file to a few people and as long as they keep it, it's still accessible. as long as somebody, somewhere is still connected, it's available forever. the only way it goes away is if everybody disconnects from it.

please learn to torrent

[macleod]

How to Use Torrents (with Pictures) - wikiHow

An expert guide to get started using torrentsTorrents are one of the most popular forms of file sharing on the internet, accounting for over

always use qbittorrent, do not use bittorrent or utorrent.

[depsidase]

[eroscestlavie]

when you’re a gay lion and you accidentally tried to introduce your lesbian lioness friend to one of her own exes at a gay bar and she goes into the bathroom and bitches you out for not being able to tell her endlessly rotating cast of girlfriends apart which isn’t really fair because first of all they all keep dyeing their hair different colors and second of all she keeps getting back together with different ones at different times and meanwhile you’ve been “single” for like 8 months but are spending a lot of time with one specific guy who works at your old co-op and were going to excitedly tell her about it tonight but now you’ve ruined the whole subject of dating by trying to introduce her to her own ex at a gay bar (which is a watering hole. because you’re lions.) 

[pharmabastard]

do not keep putting those two unfunny autistic faggots on my dash

[to2llynottoby]

[drbigsadbabymd-blog]

I love how when you first peek into Warhammer and catch a glimpse of Roboute Guilliman (who will likely be the first Primarch you see) you think ok well this is some boring staid stiff-upper lip male fantasy. I bet he's never cried in his life and grouses about ~honor~ all the time. He's just some ultra-masc roman empire (pejorative) jerkbait. Get the fuck outta here, cardboard ass character.

And then you get into it and yeah he is staid and uptight as hell, but he's also a nerd none of the Primarchs particularly like? People in the books are like "shut up, Roboute, don't you have some homework to do somewhere" and he goes "Actually yes thank you for reminding me".

He'll try to be funny but then it doesn't land.

When Ferrus Manus, one of the only guys MORE staid and stoic than him, finds out from Fulgrim that Guilliman admires him greatly, he responds "It is not reciprocated"

They think he's a lame annoying doopfuck. I don't think he has a single friend amongst his brothers beyond Sanguinius and that's because Sanguinius is your default friend. He comes included when you're born as a Primarch.

With the Lion, he's agonizing over how perfectly organized his legion is, it makes him insecure. It's like watching the straight A+ honor roll student find out his classmate got an A++ and then laying his head down on his desk in class to hide the fact he's trying not to cry.

He's a dork. It's kind of great. To have this guy who looks like a male power fantasy, but he's the least fuckable man in the galaxy. If you tried to seduce him, he'd go "The color of your hair reminds me of a wheat field on a warm summer day. I need to configurate grain transport logistics. I have to go"

It's actually quite endearing, as far as fascist bureaucrats go

[radio-jupotter]

you can say "writing a genderbend manga doesnt make someone an egg" but then theyll say some shit like "to become a girl who is loved by girls is the desire of all humanity" like ok. come on

[penny-anna]

what if on Taskmaster one of the contestants died in the middle of filming a task but after doing enough of the task for it to be deemed complete so since there was nothing in the rules to say you had to be alive throughout they allowed it. & then all the other contestants bombed so badly that the dead person won the task and in the studio Greg was there like 'wow you all managed to do worse than Christine and she was dead for most of it'

[penny-anna]

they don't sub in a replacement contestant for the studio shows so one of the chairs is just empty and sometimes when contestants are arguing their case on something they're like 'I think if Christine was still with us she'd take my side' and Greg would be like 'for fuck's sake stop bringing up Christine'

[penny-anna]

also everyone (Greg included) would dunk on Alex for 'killing Christine' with the task and Alex would keep nervously laughing it off and be like 'legally speaking we weren't responsible for what happened to Christine'

[penny-anna]

the interstitials for the season occasionally feature randomly inserted shots of Christine's lifeless body lying on the ground

[penny-anna]

obviously it would already have been announced that Christine died filming Taskmaster but during the show they wouldn't say which task it happened in so every time there's a Christine segment it'd be like is this the one where she died 🤔 let's watch and find out

[edgebug]

"grace. grace! grace give attention. rocky perform human ritual of escape closet now. statement."

"come again?"

"i learn more from thinking machine. human gender preference. attraction to same gender, means word 'gay.' all eridian same gender." rocky stands straight up. "rocky come out to grace now. all rocky plural gay, statement."

"...wow, that's... rock, i'm not sure it makes much sense to apply human ideas of sexual orientation to a monogendered species."

a long and judgmental pause. then:

"grace HOMOPHOBIC, question????"

[dumpsterfire620]

[tatangadragon]

water sports should be for adults too.me and the blokes at university should be allowed to shoot eachother with water guns

[tatangadragon]

post cancelled I've been told the term i used already exists in english and that it means something Very Much Different. english is a wicked language that i regret learning

[gregtom]

[k-simplex-deactivated20241001]

Happy Pride

[diiaf]

One of my all-time favorite Worm moments still has to be when Taylor meets Scapegoat. They trade injuries, he goes “you’re fucking blind?!” and spends the rest of the chapter being dragged around by his teammates while Taylor looks on thinking “I wonder if his power makes the damage worse for him?” Meanwhile she’s in so much less pain than before that she describes the feeling as euphoric. My dissociative queen 🪲