I’m Claiming this url Before The Bots Do

Stuff that doesn’t fit on my other blogs; often includes Neopets, MLP, Star Trek, memes, women with swords, and whatever else captures my interest at any given moment.

[ottrauva]

Oh 🫢…

[hometoursandotherstuff]

Pharmaceutical cocaine as a cure sounds like a diagnosis scribbled by medieval doctors, but science says it checks out. Wild!

[prismatic-bell]

I've also had pharmaceutical cocaine used on me, in my case to stop a nosebleed so bad I was spitting out clots the size of silver dollars and had to be put on oxygen.

I was crying because I was sure I was going to die if it didn't work and they'd put "died of a nosebleed" on my headstone and it'd be so stupid. And then I don't remember the rest of the afternoon.

[yexerrr]

*taps mic* Rocky should've been on the tumblr sexyman poll instead of Grace. *leaves*

[tastylemonbread]

[cheeseanonioncrisps]

Presumably, if adult humans are weird, then human kids must be weird as well. But of course, since aliens probably wouldn’t interact with human children too much, there might not be much about them in the human guide.

Imagine a human leaving her kid with an alien friend because her SO is sick and none of her human crewmates are able to act as babysitter and she’s got an important meeting. So she goes to the meeting and the alien takes her kid to one of the rooms in the ship that acts as a sort of play area.

Then, when the human comes out of the meeting, she picks her phone up and sees that she has some missed calls…

1st call: “Hey, Katie, it’s me, Grit. I know you’re probably in the meeting by now and can’t answer your phone, but I was just wondering… Jackie’s been chasing the other kids a lot, is she hunting them? Is that part of the whole predatory instincts thing? They all seem to be having fun— at least I think so, they’re all making that weird noise you guys make— but I just thought I’d let you know. And, um, listen… she’s not going to try and eat the ones she catches, is she?”

2nd call: “Hi, Katie, Grit again— look, I know that you guys are descended from tree climbing mammals and so your offspring need climbing equipment to satisfy those instincts— but there’s no way she’s supposed to be that high, right? None of the other parents are doing anything and I can’t go up and get her down because my hooves can’t get a grip on the frame. She’s right on top and— NO!<incomprehensible noises that sound like a cross between the moo of a cow and the bray of a donkey>— okay, so she’s swinging from the bars. One of the other humans just explained that that’s normal. He’s offered me some coffee, but I said no because I’m pretty sure that stuff’s toxic. I’ll try not to call again unless there is an emergency.”

3rd call: “I’m so sorry, Jackie’s been injured. She tripped over and seems to have lost a layer of skin from her knee. She’s making these noises and there’s liquid coming from her eye sockets and I don’t know what to do! Please pick up! There’s blood and the coffee offering human keeps saying she should suck the blood out or something. Is that a thing? Does your species’ saliva have healing properties? Shoud I call a medic?! Please pick up!”

4th call: “Sorry for that last message. Jackie seems to be doing fine now. I don’t know how— she should be laid out for weeks after an injury like that! Please, for my sanity, can you get a human babysitter next time?”

[ladylynse]

5th call: “Katie, I don’t know how to tell you this, but Jackie just handed me one of her mouth bones. Her eyes were not watering this time, but there was blood in her mouth, and the coffee-drinking human took her to get some water. I…. She will have a gap in her mouth unless you are able to get it fixed. The other humans tell me not to worry, but I know how your species need their mouth bones to begin breaking down your food. My insurance only covers at-fault interspecies accidents, and–<incoherent murmuring> What do you mean, it will grow back? Won’t it have to be reattached? <more incoherent murmuring, distinct laughter> I…. I didn’t realize this was normal for your species. It wasn’t in my handbook. I’ll try not to call again unless there’s a real emergency.

[oo0owo0oo]

[transswordbian]

Okay but that last image made me scream

[lickingandsuckingchristmascoins]

[onlymetalmolars]

Recently switched to Clip Studio Paint and I drew some Rocky’s for practice.

[plantaagomaajor]

[melle-otterwise]

I had a vision

[earth-kingdom-strap]

I stand with my canceled wife idgaf

[taumoebros]

[Vol 2. Part 5] a growing understanding —

bonus:

[PREVIOUS PART] [NEXT PART]

[TABLE OF CONTENTS]

[punkrorschach]

it is... unfortunate to see trans people go through their own version of "all boys are stupid/all girls have cooties" after they come out. take my hand. you dont have to act like a cis person to validate your gender.

[punkrorschach]

this is something a ten year old girl or perhaps jk rowling would say.

[procyon-kiryu-purgatory]

So I saw a couple of fanarts of Eva takimg care of a bloody Ava and this borned up

[blonsh]

[damienos]

[ffcrazy15]

Me: (watching Project Hail Mary) "Man, Grace and Stratt are really close. I kinda can't tell if I'm supposed to ship them or not. I wonder if they're this weirdly close in the book?"

Every shingle character in Book!Project Hail Mary: "So Grace, are you and Stratt fucking or not?"

Grace: (Balancing Stratt's 6 coffees in one hand and signing off on all her important documents with the other) "I'M JUST HER LEAD SCIENTIST, WHY DO YOU PEOPLE KEEP ASSUMING IT'S SOMETHING WEIRD?!"

[junkbondtradrr]

they are in love!