Man Door Hand Hook Car Door

\\ Achilles \\ they/them \\ 32 \\ Canada \\

[aleshakills]

*getting too in the weeds of the worldbuilding of a horny tumblr post* Okay I get that you're saying princess, but honestly the dynamic you're describing here seems more like you want to be a duchess or even a lower noble

[aleshakills]

You wanna be the villainess in an otome anime

[aleshakills]

This has nothing to do with historical accuracy by the way. It's about the genre conventions and the internal logic of the scenario. If you wanna be a princess getting kidnapped by a dragon or running of to faerie, go for it. If you wanna be a prize locked away in a tower, or an aspiring despot, be a princess.

If you want to have an intense homoerotic rivalry with another girl you met at magical boarding school, you're the daughter of a marquis at best.

[chemicahs]

Can we please bring back buttons PLEASE can we bring back buttons BUTTONS PLEASE for the love of god BUTTONS THAT YOU PRESS DOWN AND CAN FEEL IT BEING PRESSED buttons please buttons can we bring them back can we PLEASE can we please bring back the buttons

[girlnephew]

[human-pet-they]

texting everyone in my friends list “see what happens when you disobey me?” when the eclipse starts

[tenderhooked]

I WANT TO WRITE MY STORIES!!!!!!!!!!!! -> continues doing literally Anything Else besides writing

[theswisscheeserag]

You gotta be really publicly passionate about things if you want your friends to text you. Bc people will forget to text you because they’re human. But if you’re really openly the friend who loves identifying ants your friends will think of you when they see ants. And they’ll text you “what ant is this [blurry photo]”. And then they’ll ask you how you’ve been and we should get coffee sometime. But if they don’t know what you love they’ll never know what you like

[frostedmagnolias]

Purple Velvet Evening Dress

c. 1937

Augusta Auctions

[frostedmagnolias]

Dress

c. 1805

French

Kent State University Museum

[pingo1387]

having a headache while hydrated is so unfair. you were supposed to protect me.

[meowyabi]

[amnesiaguy]

you can experience life altering devastating emotion and then your cat will throw up next to you & look at you like does this help ?

[ezekiellsplayground]

Finished viking baby krytle. I made this viking style tunic for my kiddo using some lovely pure merino wool suiting and some cotton tablet woven trim I made several years ago. Only the main seams of this garment were machine sewn, everything else (ie flat seaming, collar, hemming, trim) was all hand stitched using teensy fairy stitches.

[9twoeight]

20260729 oc art

[runawaymarbles]

I love living in 2026 because I go to Home Depot and buy a 5-gallon bucket for $4. I say I do not want an email receipt. They know my email anyway because I once ordered a mop online. They email me to ask how I like my 5-gallon bucket. I do not reply. They email me again. They would like my feedback. Reminder ‼️I have purchases to review. Did my 5 gallon bucket live up to my expectations? 3 minute survey!!

[runawaymarbles]

[suffering-and-misery]

adhd paralysis sucks bcuz im just sitting there and my brain is like

YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME

no work done no rest gained. literally no point of this at all

[sabrsiren-deactivated20250418]

just wanted to share these executive dysfunction comics i am so sorry to whoever drew them these have been saved on my phone for like 6 years

[catasters]

[charlesoberonn]

Mammu! Finius and Ferbingetorix built Rome in a day!

[charlesoberonn]

[charlesoberonn]

[asphor]

I feel like this also implies that rome is somehow being destroyed by the end of the day

[charlesoberonn]

The Emperor Constantine loves Finius and Ferbingetorix's "New Rome" so much that he makes it his new capital and names it after himself.

[asphor]

Yeah that checks out.

What's the doofenschmirtz contraption/scheme of the day?

[charlesoberonn]

Doofenric the Ostrogoth (insert jokes about his daughter Vanessa being "Goth" but in the modern sense) invented a City-Mover-Inator to move Rome across the Danube so his Germanic confederation could sack it.

Thankfully, Agent Pericles stops him by redirecting the Inator to Finius and Ferbingetorix's New Rome instead, moving it to the Bosphorus.

[charlesoberonn]

While Pericles and Doofenric are fighting over the controls of the Inator, it gets accidentally changed to paint remover mode and then fired at a random direction.

Somewhere nearby a painter just finished coloring the statue of the emperor when suddenly all the paint gets removed.

Painter: Aw...

Painter, giving it a second look: Hmmm... 🤔

[charlesoberonn]

Candysseia: What animal even is Pericles?

Finius: We named it "platypus", meaning flat-foot.

Ferbingetorix: On account of his feet being flat.

Candysseia: And where did he come from?

Febingetorix: We have no earthly idea.

[charlesoberonn]

Doofenric the Goth: Pericles the- wait, what animal even are you, Agent Pericles?

Pericles: *hands him papyrus*

Doofenric: *reading* A "platypus", meaning flat-foot... oh, on account of your feet being flat!

[charlesoberonn]

To be clear, the Emperor Constantine looks like Roger Doofenshmirtz.

Also, I agree with everybody who says that Greco-Roman Candace's name should be Candassandra (since nobody believes her warnings).