[xbutchellie]

me calling neil druckmann to force him to give us a dlc where ellie finds dina and apologizes for everything

[shepherds-pies]

learn the alphabet with killing eve

[mcsqu1bb]

My autistic brother created a new family Christmas tradition

Okay, so last year, my mom bought this Christmas moose that she lovingly named Barry

This is him

Cute, right?

Well, for whatever reason only known to my brother, he decided that he wanted to put Barry in different rooms of our house and it usually scares the shit out of whomever happens upon Barry; usually the person who finds him is the person that my brother wanted to scare.

So far, Barry has been found

On our dining room table

On my dad's side of my parents' bed

In my parents' closet

Outside their bedroom door (at 5 in the morning and scared my mother shitless)

Near the kitchen door

Near my fucking bed

At the bottom of my sister's stairwell

In our bathroom

And down the hallway

This has gone on for 9 days and it doesn't seem to show signs of stopping. Most of the time we know who gets Barry because it's always followed with a very loud "FUCKING BARRY!!!!!"

My brother is the funniest fucking person I know.

[mcsqu1bb]

Update:

He found his way into my sister's room.

And my brother is cackling maniacally downstairs.

[mcsqu1bb]

Holy fuck this doll is creepy

[mcsqu1bb]

Another update:

The soft glow of the Christmas tree seems to quell his bloodlust

[thesaltofcarthage]

vote to replace the evil surveillance Elf on the Shelf with Barry the Chrismoose

[annethecatdetective]

Broke: Elf on the Shelf Woke: Moose on the Loose

[hypokeimena]

two characters who have Seen Some Shit, the first time they Do It: identify and kiss each other’s scars in order to affirm the fact that they are here now together and Still Alive

me every time: 

[satinonsoftskin]

in the mood to be kissseddddd. all gentle and slow

[monicam]

my first attempt at a creepypasta (beginner here; go easy on me)

carpeted kitchen

[ink-pedia]

serena caponera

[lambily-deactivated20200702]

[jackisreallycool]

My energy

[rigaya-deactivated20180901]

im the girl

[juuliaroberts]

EAT THE RICH

[sixpenceee]

Remedy introduces Uuno, a Staffordshire Bull Terrier that the studio is employing for motion capture tests.

[i-dreaminwords]

give him a raise!

[utautattooedghoul]

GIVE THAT PUPPY ALL THE RAISES AND PROMOTIONS! 

[thebootydiaries]

gotta drink away the pain :(

[filmnoirsbian]

In honor of me approaching my first 6 months mark as a flight attendant, here are some highlights from my time in this job:

When a lady stopped me gently to whisper that i had “mastered the art of kindness”

When an elderly woman told me i was “put on earth to be a flight attendant”

Each and every time someone complimented my nails

When i found an $8000 diamond watch left behind under a seat, gave it to a gate agent, only to have the passenger come running back 10 minutes later. Gate agent: man u wouldve been in trouble, huh? Man whom looked like a bond villain: i wouldve been SHOT.

Every lesbian ive worked with and had the nice bonding moment of “ur gay?? Im gay!!”

That time a man tried to get huffy with me because he wasnt in 1st class and i got to say “sir u can either sit in this seat or u can sit in a seat in the terminal while u wait to take the next flight”

When i had an emergency landing because the pilots lost steering and we all thought we were gonna die but then we didn’t and everyone just applauded the landing and didnt even complain about the 2 hour delay

When my flight was delayed for 3 hours because the plane wouldnt start so the crew and i just took a really long nap in the jetway

Every 4 and 5 star hotel ive stayed at for free

When we overnighted in the middle of nowhere in alabama and went to a sports bar at midnight. The bartender locked the door so it was just him and us and his friend, and we all got super drunk on obscure alcohols and i kicked everyones ass at pool

That time i had an emergency landing because one pilot had such explosive diarrhea that the other 2 pilots had to wear oxygen masks

When we overnighted in a casino resort in new orleans and ended up drunk on margaritas and playing blackjack with a bunch of old people at 2pm

Every little kid on my flights

Every dog i got to pet on my flights

When we were flying to nyc during julliard recruitments and half the seats were taken up by cellos

Being in airports late at night and seeing people sleep in the weirdest places because they just dont care (bathroom floors, under gate agent desks, etc)

When a woman forgot her actual baby on the plane

Woman: can i board first? Gate agent: are u special needs, active military or priority? Woman: no i just want to board first. Gate agent: maam i have 70 other people who also want to board first, im not looking for a line leader.

My very first working flight, when a man pointed to my necklace and said “is that a ball gag?” And, in my shock, i said “no, im gay”

[filmnoirsbian]

That time a ramp agent came up to me holding up his phone and said “wanna see something weird?” and i said yes, reservedly, thinking it might be gross but then he held out his phone and it was just a picture of hundreds of paradise birds that we were apparently flying to a zoo

[arianna738]

My phone’s camera accidently started doing a vertical panorama. Decided to give it a go and got this really cool pic!

[tallon-underworld]

Dang

[theonecalledpreposterous-deacti]

“Do you love the color of fire?”

[god-of-brawlhalla]

Sometimes I forget everything is made from bits of stuff that the stars are made of, and this makes me feel warm inside.

[cosantiago]

you: are you a hoodie, plaid, or leather jacket bisexual?

me, an intellectual:

[darkvoodoo23]

[okayqueer]

[fuffuster-deactivated20150719]

I’M SO GLAD THIS GOT A TON OF NOTES

[teratocybernetics]

THEY LOOK SO HAPPY TO BE HELPING

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

TINY FRIENDS

[micdotcom]

Watch:  Chicago woman had some great responses to a white man’s disturbing racist attacks.

[crimeshetyped]

I reblogged this 0.2 sec ago but I love her clapbacks so much

[dnaguzzlingteamcaptain]

Yeah should be doing this more.

[reenuka-deactivated20181217]

I just love how she says “He does not look to be of Native American descent,” lmao.

[zazie-beetzz-deactivated2022071]

So, i loved Deadpool 2. On one hand, it’s funny as hell, has great action, a kickass soundtrack, awesome characters and wonderful preformances. But it’s also very progressive for a big budget action film. As many has already mentioned; a pansexual lead, a plus-size teenager as a superhero, a black superheroine with vitiligo, a mixed-race teenaged lesbian couple, the list goes on. And i know that some of these points are directly from the comics, but that doesn’t always mean jack-shit to Hollywood, as we know.

But what i haven’t really seen people talk about that i also loved was how the movie treated Domino.

She’s never sexualized. Ever. She’s a gorgeous adult woman and dressed in skin tight leather, yet i didn’t notice one instance of the camera “leering” at her body in any sexual way, like we see in multiple action movies with conventionally attractive women in leading roles.

… but more importantly, she’s not the object of any sexist jokes or remarks from the male characters. Ever. Not one comment about her looks, her outfit, the fact that she’s a woman. She’s a complete equal to them all the way through. The only minor thing i can think of is when Peter says “will you give Domino my email?”. That’s it!

As a woman who loves action movies, especially comic book ones, that made me so goddamn happy. Who would have thought that one the most progressive comic book movies in this golden era of them would be Deadpool freaking 2?

Take notes, Hollywood.

[myboyfriendpetebuttigieg]

*talking to a gay couple*

So which one of you is… you know… the one who doesn’t fucking text back?

[babyxbruiser-deactivated2024070]

Oh my god