surprisingly not a porn blog

[motherfucker-unlimited]

Americans fall for gacha and lootboxes so hard because they didn't get their immunity early in life from Kinder Surprise

[hotvampireadjacent]

“Kill them with kindness.” Of course. Just make sure you do kill them.

[brucebocchi]

[kominfyrirkattarnef]

Have you guys noticed how much the internet/technology just does not listen to you anymore? I click “don’t show this artist” on Spotify and I get recommended a music video by them on the front page. I click “skip this update” on a pop up every time I open a file organization app and it’s right back there every time. I click unsubscribe on a newsletter and it keeps showing up in my inbox!! I click “delete my account” and the next time I open the website they suggest I “reactivate”.

[muppetshow2026]

WHAT IS THE CHARGE? EATING A PENGUIN? A SUCCULENT ADÉLIE PENGUIN?

[animentality]

[ao3cassandraic]

It matters that we refuse.

It matters that we resist.

It matters that we be loud about our refusal and resistance.

[speedlimit15]

love when my internet gets bad and im just scrolling the dash looking at the diagonal gradients

[speedlimit15]

[hasgavlebockenburneddownyet]

Hi, before I get started I'd like to state that I have no idea what gun control is like in Sweden (I'm American) and that I'm pro common sense gun laws.

That said... has anyone ever tried shooting an incendiary round at the goat? One shot and the whole thing would go up like a barn full of a hay in July.

I'm assuming that if a flaming arrow is a safe enough method of goat-arson, then a bullet would probably work just as well as long as there aren't any people within like a 3-meter radius of it's trajectory and as long as angle is accounted for so that if it passes through it, it'll hit the ground and not something else.

Probably not feasible, but these were just my thoughts.

oh god yanks are so hilarous

[mitchipedia]

[cumaeansibyl]

if the tech teacher doesn't know what linux is then he deserves whatever mayhem this middle schooler is going to inflict

[william-snekspeare]

hater of socks

[william-snekspeare]

what is your problem !!!

[yffresbeard]

i think it is important to recognize the ways in which your favorite thing sucks. i think it keeps u normal

[rabbithaver]

prev im so sorry to put you on blast like this but please know this had me in hysterics

[dogpuppy]

[uwillneverknowwho]

Hey. Stop for a second. Take this moment to appreciate that you don't have to write a paper right now. No one is asking you to write a paper. You don't have to think about the paper or plan your time around the paper. You have the freedom to think about whatever you want. Everything is going to be okay. At least you don't have to write a paper right now

[mix-and-max]

CEOs such a deeply unserious concept. Hi I'm the guy whose job it is to decide how much money everyone gets and I just so happened to decide I should get two squilliam dollars and you should get a penny and a half. I know I did a good job because math please don't double check.

[sasha--nein]

[redstonedust]

you'll spend so long in deep discussions of gender online and then go talk to someone in your real life family and find out they still havent gotten past "women can be good at things" and its like oh okay jesus christ i forgot some people are still on the baby steps huh

[tinylobelia-deactivated20200702]

[wisteriafield]

i’ll kick anyone’s ass. i’ll kick your ass. i’ll kick your dog’s ass. i’ll kick my own ass

[yvesdot]

Alright, fine, here's the backstory about replacing my Microsoft Copilot key with a picture of a carp. Warning: that's the whole story.

When I bought my latest laptop, which coincidentally is already losing functionality in multiple keys, I noticed that the right Control button was no longer a right Control button. This was a bad sign for me, someone who fairly frequently used the right Control button. Worse still, it now bore the Microsoft Copilot logo and would open, when pressed, Microsoft Copilot. Not having personal interest in that particular robot, I was now in the market to rebind that key to something else.

I initially considered setting it up as my dedicated The Sims 2 button, but not only do I not yet have The Sims 2 installed on this computer, the way I play that game, it takes upwards of 15 minutes to boot up. I knew I would be constantly accidentally hitting this key, and I did not want to be constantly accidentally opening The Sims 2.

My partner immediately suggested that I set it to open "a jpeg of a fish." I Googled "carp," found an image, and set my right Control key to open a tiny browser window with a link to said fish. Though it is a .png file from pngtree labeled "pngtree-rohu-carp-fish-png-png-image_4022775.png", in an effort to display matrimonial piety, I dutifully labeled it "fish jpeg."

I now accidentally open this link multiple times a day, which is great, because it means I have a lot of opportunities to see a fish. Sometimes I accidentally hit it several times in quick succession, which means I get to see several fish! When I close all my open programs to shut down my computer, I usually find at least one forgotten fish. Things are working out beautifully, and everyone is happy.

The other day I brought up this story to a friend and relayed the saga of my success to her through her obvious confusion. At the end of my tale she asked me, "Why didn't you just bind it back to right Control?" and I had to admit to her that it honestly never occurred to me.