TW big ass vent post
I know I’ve been gone for a few months. You know, I still love DC and the Batfamily (Tim Drake solos), but sometimes… you just lose that spark. I’ve been making content consistently since 2023, and I still want to make videos and post them, or even just draw, but nothing really comes out. I’m going to try to post something by Tim Drake’s birthday, though. I’m doing my best. Work, college, and my technical course have all been pushing me to my limit lately.
Talking to a friend, she mentioned how my art style keeps changes a lot, something I'd never noticed before. I mean, it was just sketches, so obviously it would change from one draft to another.
But looking at my art, I realized how much it's changed in the last few five months due to a rollercoaster of emotions and a struggle to avoid falling into depression. It was five straight months of negative feelings, five months of drawing because it felt more like an obligation than something I enjoy, months of doing simple art, even though I had all the free time I couldn't draw, my mind was full of thousands of thoughts and I spent the whole day anxious.
However, these days things have improved and drawing has become something I enjoy again, even though my style keeps changing, it shows signs of mental health.
Last month, I ended up in the hospital twice, and one of those times I was admitted for almost a week. Now I’m packing up all my stuff because I’m moving. I’m living on my own now, and holy shit, life is hard
On top of that, losing someone I loved… fuck. I spent about half a month barely eating anything, and whenever I did eat, I’d just throw it back up.
I’m doing okay now. I’m just trying to take life a little more lightly. I know no one’s probably going to see this post, but maybe by the end of the year, or even a few years from now, I’ll look back at it and think, “Damn… I’ve come a long way.”
