Mari n' Mason

Duo of headmates in OSDD sys, Cottage-core gremlins

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

vampires who volunteer at nursing homes so they can meet people their own age

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

#vampires who volunteer at nursing homes so they can hit on senior citizens that are way too young for them

[ctrl-shift-alt-9]

[teaboot]

My mom likes to tell me about how when I was a little kid riding public transport with her I'd always smile and giggle and chat with weird old ladies who smelled like cat pee and homeless folks and strangers dressed in bizarre outfits but any time a tidy and respectable businessman in a suit and tie waved at me I'd immediately clam up, and she takes a great deal of pride in my supposed inherentability to clock personalities but the truth is I do vaguely remember those bus rides, and it was never about the clothes or the hair or the smell, but more because everyone "strange" asked interesting questions and listened to what I had to say and seemed to think about what I said while the neat and tidy and rigid folks only ever acted like they were going through the motions, which was boring as hell and also pretty annoying

[teaboot]

Well-to-do finance manager with tidy shoes: "Why hello, sweetheart. Can you say 'hi'? Aren't you cute. Are you on a trip with your mom?"

4 year old me: why must we do this

Fantastic old woman in the leopard print coat: "Why yes, my tooth IS real silver! Nobody ever asks me that. Do you like cats?"

4 year old me, suddenly paying attention: Finally, A Person Of Intellect

[cheerlybelz]

[pjackk]

Before and after yep hes mustard gravy

Didnt smell good so i poured it down the drain without take a bite

[pjackk]

My plugs got a special strain i be buyin in bulk

[kidzbopdeathgrips]

got pulled over by an anti-intellectual pig (police officer) on my way home from work for thinking and driving. luckily i was able to reason his gun out of his holster and debunk him twice in the skull at point-blank range before driving away safe and sound

[voz-12]

That's it, Chap. Put that monocle and top-hat on. You don't need to think anymore, you're a proper Gentlemanly Chap now. Yes, drink your tea.. Now get in the fantastical steampunk flying machine..

----

#chap fetish #forcechap #gentleman k1nk #gentleman nsft #forcesteam #not bluey #nsft chap

[0v9]

I am, like, a long running proponent of the "eat something and you'll feel better" crowd and am often one of the first people to suggest "maybe it's time for a snack before I get whipped into a frenzy" but I really do resent how instantaneous it is. like it'll feel like I'm having my worst day in months and then I'll start eating and literally before I even finish I'm like oh yeah the world is beautiful

[iceemoon]

this line delivery is so fucking funny

[crabussy]

great

[dungeonmastersconsortium]

Me stepping onto the balcony to address my followers

[kritzenkriegen]

*thinks up an idea for a silly quick piece* okay haha let's whip something up real quick

*idea gets more complicated*

*idea gets more complicated*

*idea gets more complicated*

*idea gets more complicated*

oh no

[0ddoblivion]

This kills me every time

[pixiecaps]

big fan of whatever the youth is doing to torment scientology buildings

[pixiecaps]

they couldnt take the heat

[doctordotdj]

[easel-eisel]

you should probably worry about the wraith as well

[boudicca]

if i were a beta in the omegaverse i'd be so mad watching my coworkers get paid heat/rut leave while i get nothing. it's like when your fuckass coworker gets to take a cigarette break nid-shift and come back smelling bad but instead they get to go home and fuck nasty for a week because they made the choice not to take suppressants meanwhile i have to stay in the office running spreadsheets with debra whose scent patches don't do anything to hide the smell of mothballs or the alpha from marketing she's cheating on her husband with

[tragbarerpanzrabwehrkomplexfagot]