Maria in Wonderland @mariafromwonderland - Tumblr Blog

A Safe Place

(A/N: This is my first time writing in english. This is a way to let my feelings pour out and channel it into something somewhat beautiful. Feel free to tell me what you think. Please, do not share without permission.)

Security.

Sense of home. Sometimes that is exactly what we seek. Somewhere safe; away from all the noise and uneasiness that seems to surround us. We want to get away from our demons, from our fears, from our doubts. And yet, we seek a place to unleash it all. We want to feel secure enough that it won’t come back haunting us. We want to strip down to our most vulnerable versions. The one people find ugly, unfitting, unworthy, and still feel safe.

Everyone expects something from you. They want you to be yourself. Your best version, even if it's fake. They don’t care. They only crave the feelings, the warmth, the buzz, the emotion, joy that only you seem to provide them. You are a beacon. The source of light they need to get by. Unyielding. Unforgiving. Strong. Enticing. Inviting. Beautiful. Perfect. You are as perfect as they need you to be in their eyes. Yet you still won’t move a finger to meet their expectations.

You keep watching your every step. You don’t want to lose yourself. You cannot let them tame you. You fight to keep your essence. Do your best to see through the cracks and find what are the meanings behind some of your actions, behind your words. You want to be raw. Genuine. Honest. You want people to feel that they can do the same, so you let them in.

You let them see all that beauty and uniqueness that lies inside. Bit by bit you show your true colors, from the lightest to the darkest hues. It’s a complex range. Those who are adventurous enough to dive deeper into who the woman you are never come back in one piece. It’s a dangerous territory. Words sweet as heaven and a touch as vile as it can be. Addicting.

You can’t seem to figure out where it all comes from. Why would you? This is your sacred place. An intricate mess of feelings, beliefs and doubts... It is where you find solace. Is your retreat. This maze is your everything. It makes you so scared, but it doesn’t cease to amaze you. And when you least expect, you realize you are the safe place you’ve always tried to find.

#mariawrites #writters on tumblr #writing #mental health #self care #recovery #breakup #poetic

nijaded

Poetry in Motion — the phenomenal Florence Welch

ghostlywriterr

Santa Maria della Salute. Venice, Italy.

vintagepales2-blog

Schönbrunn Palace, Vienna

Selfish.

From time to time I stop to think about how much I’ve disappointed people. Every time, I realize it was all because I made things about myself. No, I don’t think I’m selfish for it. I cherish the decision I’ve made in the past and I’m grateful for that. I might’ve lost some people along the way, but I found myself.

At 17 I had to hear from my dad that he didn’t like who I became. Now I see that the problem was me having my own beliefs.

A friend would make me feel like garbage for not making my life about her. The moment I walked away, she decided to paint me as bad person just for refusing to put up with her toxic nature.

A boyfriend wanted me to play the perfect girl and then he’d flip out the moment I refused. I endured this for months and the moment we broke up, I had to hear from friends all the shit he’s spread about me.

I stood my ground when they were to coming at me with all they had. I went through shit for trying to remain sane. I went from hiding panic attacks to not being able to share the truth about a night that still haunts me.

Some think I’m unstable. Some think I’m a failure. Some think I’m not worthy. Selfish. All because I refused to fit the in role they had picked for me.

Fighting the world in order to not lose yourself does not make you selfish.

It makes you brave.

#mariawrites #selfish #writer #life #text #monologue

kuutamosonaatti

Lily Cole dances on stage prior to the Vivienne Westwood Red Label show during London Fashion Week SS14

#photography #aesthetic #pink #film #photoart

himneska

Yulianna Sardar photographed by Anastasia Lisitsyna for MY812 Fall/Winter 2019.

thoradvice

romanticize your life. i cannot stress this enough. use scented shower gel and shampoo, so you look forward to showers. go on walks and see how pretty the sky looks. notice the wildflowers on the roadside as you drive. light a candle when you get home to make your room smell good. notice & appreciate the little things in life. it won't cure your mental illness, but it'll make it easier to exist in this world.

odonianpoet

It’s all about the vibes.

#crystals #nature #garden #quartz #amethist #jade #pink #aesthetic #photography #chill #good vibes #meditation

slothwrter

THINGS WRITERS NEED TO HEAR

you are allowed to take a break. you don’t have to write if you don’t feel like it.

everyone has their own pace. it doesn’t matter if you writer one page or ten pages a day, you are still a writer.

your first draft is going to suck. every first draft or every book has sucked. i’ll get better and better as you edit. that’s what editing is for, making your work actually good.

experiment. try out new routines, new styles, new genres. it’ll never harm you. you’ll gain experience and become a better writer. you’ll understand what suits you and what doesn’t.

you don’t need publishing to be a writer. publishing is just an option but if you don’t want to you can just keep your writing to yourself.

if you write, then you’re a writer. no matter how much experience you have, what genre you write, if you are published or not. you are a writer.

everyone is different. everyone has a different style so find your own and rock it. search for inspiration but ultimately focus on what allows you to express your ideas in the best way possible.

you are doing great. no matter how productive you are, how much you’ve written, how fast you write. you are gonna achieve your goal and it’s gonna feel so good.