Beneath it all, we could be a great distance away.

Mexican California trashbag. Anya, 30, female, socially inept. I have problematic ships: deal. This blog is 18+ so shoo young 'uns. Main fandoms: Epic the Musical, Tolkien, MXTX, Captive Prince, ATLA, Nintendo, Hannibal, GW2. Feel free to ask for more.

[marikocrimsonsky]

^This blog doesn't believe in boycotts!

[calcazars]

let it be known that i touch grass frequently and I’m still like this.

[strawberry-crocodile]

for real tho it feels exhausting that ive seen this whole "woman should be allowed to abstain from X beauty standard" -> "i perform X beauty standard, am i evil? do you think im evil? please forgive me i came up with a dozen excuses 🥺" since like 2015 (and i know its been going on longer than that) like girl thats not the poiiiiint

[strawberry-crocodile]

look me in the eyes. repeat after me. "i face societal pressure to perform this beauty standard. i should not face that pressure. i conform to this standard. i am rewarded for performing to this standard. i need to respect women who do not perform this standard. this is not about whether or not i am a sinner for wearing makeup."

[crybabybat]

You literally have to understand that ur closest friends and loved ones may very well have kinks or fetishes that gross or freak you out and they simply won’t tell you because they know it grosses or freaks you out. Like you have no way of knowing if your best friend is into necro roleplay if she doesn’t wanna tell you. Sometimes you date someone for years before finding out they have a thing for incest. Maybe your coworker likes ageplay and diapers. Who gives a fuck. Nothing changes between you knowing and not knowing except your own constructed moral outrage.

[bark-barkley]

no i actually cant fit doing this thing that takes 5 minutes into my schedule sorry :/ i only have the entire day free i just cant

[cowthropologist]

Do I actually want to write this fanfic or do I just want to wallow in the delicious daydream like a pig in the mud?

[thebitchywitchyone]

Unfortunately I wish for others to wallow in my magnificent mud pit

[koiagain]

"Employment" big scam. Big scam to distract You from what matters,posting on Ur tumblr blog at 3am

[angelsdean]

did you know you can re-read fics? did you know that if you wait long enough and have a bad memory and/or have read so many other fics since then that they all blur together you can then experience the fic almost as if it's the first time all over again??? DID YOU KNOW

[wiionme]

[segamascott]

to make it more lynchian can't you read

[weiila]

Typical Disney-style story of a kingdom with an anxious new ruler whose inherited chief advisor has a goatee, dresses in black and red, smirks a lot and keeps a snake as a pet.

Every single villanous plot to overthrow the kind and ”weak” ruler fail because the advisor is 110% loyal but his vibes make all the baddies assume he’ll help out in the insidious coup plan so they recruit him, and he absolutely delights in puppeteering wannabe autocrats into digging their own graves. He doesn’t want to rule, he’s having way too much fun being a villain honey trap.

[weiila]

Add-on to this idea: the ruler and the advisor have some elaborate code speak based on like gardening or knitting or something (because chess would be too obvious) to secretly keep each other up to date on ongoing plots. When the advisor slips up at one point, and is kidnapped and replaced with an impostor, this is what alarms the ruler to that the rescue ninja need to be sent out.

”Yeah the shadow clobe was perfect except he had no idea how to prune grapes properly.”

[william-snekspeare]

This is so real

[pixellangel]

HOLD ON I HAVE A GIF FOR THIS

[pixellangel]

yes ive been waiting for my moment

[boringkate]

When I was a kid watching tv was idiot coded and nerds read books, but now scrolling shortform videos is considered braindead behavior and watching tv means you're some kinda intellectual. You might think this shifting assessment of media's consumers might make readers into absolute super geniuses, but no. Only perverts read now.

[imsobadatnicknames2]

Does anyone else get pissed off when you wake up just as you were making significant progress in some bullshit task you had to do in a dream? Like great now I did all that shit for nothing

[dogpuppy]

[nineteenyearoldmeblog]

im fucking crying

[oodlyenough]

a thing about me is i basically never notice a wig or other kind of hairpiece in tv/movies. it has to be party city territory for me to even twig it. people will complain about characters' wigs looking bad and i will nod along but there is like a 90% chance i did not notice for a second while watching. i consider this mostly a blessing.

[kholran]

It’s finally happened.

After almost a decade on this site, I found another Tumblr user in the wild. I stopped to tie my shoe with rainbow laces this morning outside the silversmith at Colonial Williamsburg, and I heard it.

“I like your shoelaces.”

Oh. Oh no.

I responded the only way I could. “Thanks.” And then I reluctantly added, “I stole them from the president…and if that makes sense to you, I’m very sorry.”

The poor man, in full Colonial dress, stared at me for a long moment. And then burst into laughter. And said, “I haven’t thought about that in YEARS and this has never happened to me before.”

Yeah. Me neither. Not until today.

Tumblr rite of passage. Achievement unlocked.

[beggars-opera]

@victoriansecret I found your friend!!!

[beggars-opera]

[fishandshesmygills]

it’s so hard for me to not doxx myself every single day btw. my oversharer’s spirit is being stifled by internet safety