The Common Thread

We are all on this rock together- celebrate your differences and accept your commonalities

[marvelousmrsmagic-blog]

Psychic/Spiritual Rest

 I’ve spent the last 10 years of my recovery on legal disability because aggressive PTSD symptoms manifested as agoraphobic tendencies, and seizures-

One time I got hired as a dog babysitter for a facility close by. My entire job was to have a sleepover with a dozen dogs, give them their little medicines, and tuck them in at night, and feed them in the morning. I was so paralyzed with anxiety after my first night I called a psychiatric hospital to admit me the next day.   My problem wasn’t that I didn’t have time for rest or that I couldn’t spend all day sleeping, or eating, or playing video games, it was the horrible guilt that went along with knowing other people like me are struggling without the help of aid and the general sense of “WHY aren’t you doing more?” These insecurities came along well before I claimed myself as a psychic medium and way, way before I learned what is called “spiritual logic”. To me Spiritual Logic is the notion that whatever I do and whatever happens to me has a cause, good (favorable) or bad (unpleasant) but that regardless, I am on my path for a reason, because of these things. And because I am on my path, and the things I did to get here were both ‘bad’ and ‘good’ that someone is looking out for and encouraging me along the way.

I still don’t currently have a job, and I still occasionally feel bad about it- but that doesn’t mean I abandon my Spiritual Logic or Spoonie freedom of choice. Today, rest means biding my time... and it takes a lot of energy to admit that my plan and the plan of the creator are the same thing and that right now, what I can do today, is mould my spiritual interests, and keep them up. And the rest I need is letting go of my mistakes and the mistakes of others. It takes a lot of energy to explode because my partner made a comment about my clothes that I found angering and sometimes it happens so fast it’s like an atomic bomb went off. To me, resting means allowing his comment to wash over and past me- knowing he means no harm and couldn’t take the comment back anyways- using my Spiritual Logic I tell myself “He isn’t perfect but that doesn’t change our relationship or how I feel about him”

Rest is also about limiting exposure to a lot of light and noise activity, taking time to read and learn. Taking time to build strong brain muscles to help me heal- music, art, writing, are all tools I use to stay grounded and sharp. Sometimes actual rest isn’t sleeping or vegging out but allowing myself to feel like a Queen in my home, knowing that this domain is mine and this bed is mine and I own the bed and I’m going to nap in the bed, and the angels will help me if I need help from the bed where, I, the Queen of my castle, sleeps. Rest, to me, also includes The Good Place, and Stranger things. I LOVE TV and MUSIC! But they can get disorienting, just as much as if I spent the whole day in the silence. But that’s just good balance.

I think something any spoonie can practice to conserve spoons or “wash” the ones they have- is to be confident in your rest, to trust in your higher spiritual power, and know that you’ve passed all the tests thus far and need to enjoy a good break- however confidently you can.

[marvelousmrsmagic-blog]

My feelings on trauma

Your heart reflects mine

If we're all wrong does it matter who is right?

Anxiety isn't mine alone- we share the burden

The most common burden, respect it- not as a human flaw

Abused and abuser suffer the trauma. The innocent and the Devil

How can it be so common and simple that we must suffer as equals?

Who is the most deserving to care for their ills?

Tell my I am lazy for relying on my aids

Tell me I'm weak because caring is my career

It will fall on deaf ears

[marvelousmrsmagic-blog]

Empathic challenges

Have you ever been in the grocery store and heard a baby crying- and then wanted to burst into tears and an overwhelming sense of sadness and *feelings* that It DID NOT feel fair that your brother got to do the thing you wanted to do but could not because you are too small. I get it. 

Being an Empath is an incredible gift but for sensitive people it can be even physically draining to be in the near vicinity as someone who may be struggling or feeling elation. There is a certain amount of feeling “out of control” that I feel occasionally. Empathy can help you sniff out those who may be being less than authentic or up front with you- just by using your sense of “feeling”. Need underestimate your sense of “feeling”. And just because you don’t think or believe you don’t have empathic gifts doesn’t mean you do not have that primal sense of survival that tells you who is deemed trustworthy and who is not. Sometimes I feel there's a split second before I make a decision about someone that reveals my true feelings- and then there is the ego self to protect and direct us and whether or not we want that person in our lives. Narcissists loves to exploit sensitives because we have a tendency to see the love in people before they show themselves.

Some things you can try to protect yourself when you’re around an energy vampire or someone who wants to exploit your energy is imagine yourself surrounded by mirrors to reflect their behavior back to them- careful though, as you may see your own qualities reflected back. You can Imagine yourself being surrounded and protected by giant Angel’s wings of wrapped in a thick blanket made of white light. I’ve even imagined a big white parka with a hood that I put up over my head. Meditating can help to strengthen your powers of visualization, making the protective visualizations more powerful. There are spells of protection- I recommend any magical practice that does not imply black magic. As the universal laws of attraction state: What ever you put out will come back to you in kind. If you send out spells to hurt another person, at the end of the day, you are only hurting yourself (no matter if the spell is effective or not). Sage is very protective, I smudge with it and also use some oil in a diffuser.

Be attractive- I don’t mean in what you put on your body or how much time you spend at the gym, but spending time manifesting good people and surrounding yourself with positive affirmations can help manifest good people in your life. The Universe doesn’t always answer our prayers or requests in the time that we feel we want or need, but trust that it will come along in due course. I may have not made a lot of close friends this way but I have certainly attracted people in my life who are willing to help me in every arena- and that’s a very safe feeling because I know if I tune into the people around me that the energy I receive is the positive energy I put into the manifestation. 

I am so thankful for my empathic gifts, the gifts of the people and animals in my life, the skill and talents I have. What love,

Everyone has gifts beyond the physical realm- and like the Medium John Edwards would say, the gift is in recognizing that you have gifts and choosing to learn them and use them. 

[marvelousmrsmagic-blog]

You’re a Medium

I’m a bit of a baby psychic- things will go slowly I’ll see things before they happen if the conditions are right. Usually before someone reaches out. I struggled with the intense anxiety that someone was going to die by suicide and this went on for a year- when my sister died of a drug overdose the feeling passed. A strange coincidence or a premonition doesn’t really matter because the FEELING was loud and persistent. I know I’m not an expert yet, but I do wonder intensely about that incident. Because she wasn't using, had a job, was happy, was practicing her own spirituality in the metaphysical world when something or someone triggered her to an overdose- I know it’s not a suicide but I digress....

 My first awakening happened in Marquette. I was meditating with a guided meditation for pelvic pain and had taken a draw on my MMJ cartridge after a very long and painful 8 hour car ride. In my meditation I saw my face outlined in a yellow gold above my head in my closed eyes. I never thought about any extra sensory perception and believed Google would probably be the expert but “seeing my face above my face” wasn’t yielding great results. I followed a tiny crumb trail to... something.. which led me to something else. Over the past two years I’ve enjoyed learning about auras and energies, learned to love crystals, oils, and oracles and tarot. I’m currently into symbols and astrology and using them as guides. I tend to be of the school of thought that my information comes from angels and that they guide me to honing my gifts. I feel I can hear them and ask them questions and follow their answers. I’ve gotten incredible guidance and have learned to love strange coincidences that make no sense until something aligns later in the day or week or whenever! Last week I was tying my shoes and was feeling really confident, about to step out of the house when I hear “You’re a medium” to which I responded “Wow, thank you- I have been watching my weight.” I felt light and glowing! A day later it dawned on me “Oh!... medium..ship”. 

I had my confirmation at my next Reiki session- I was enjoying the healing spirits and knowing that I was safe and protected. That healing was traveling to parts of my mind and body that had not yet been touched by modern medicine when nearing the end of my session I hear “HELL” “GORE” and immediately start obsessing about what I did wrong. I left the session feeling horrible and walked to my favorite coffee shop in a pissed off funk. The more I walked and thought the more I cursed the session and longed for different spirituality. I text my Reiki practitioner with my feelings and to my delight she responded with “Congratulations! You’re a medium and an empath!” and told me of the 1800s Spirit who spies on her space believing her to be practicing witchcraft. Turns out she hadn't smudged that day and the little haunter came in to sway me the wrong way. Shifty bugger.

It did teach me how to feel for negative spirits- everything I do is by feeling, a sensation I have not yet learned to trust. It’s easier to see an aura and think “Yes, this is a thing I have seen and the person has confirmed their feeling in relation to that color and now I am right!” as opposed to feeling my hands get hot or an ear or my head start to tingle.

I question my sanity when I hear “give me my mouth back” while my father is cooking fried chicken and I feel the influence of a longing presence. Or when I get unwanted information about another’s sexuality. Even a gut feeling makes me feel “wrong”. I am sure it is a matter of practice and trust. The trust I need has to come from within and I haven’t learned how to trust the things I feel. I know this comes from trauma when I was very young but I wish I could trust the way being a good ESP-er should be, but everyone evolves at their own rate- including me and I need to accept that and trust that things will unfold at their own rate.

If you’re a struggling medium, psychic, animal whisperer- don’t feel bad, just because it comes naturally doesn't mean it isn’t hard work nearly all the time. Be open, be loving, be forgiving of yourself and others and watch the miraculous things that can happen around you at astounding rates.

-MarvelousMrsMagic