Mary’s Writings

they/them | 23 | i (try to) post every day | all writings are my original content | cat's name is Freja |

[maryhall]

Hestia

your well-being is more important

than their feelings.

don’t let their cries

spike your guilt,

for your leaving

will mend the balance

and you, free,

shall explore the earth.

Their fire will rage on

but if you stay

yours will die.

[maryhall]

I haven’t thought of her in so long

but last night I dreamed of grandma

somewhere near the end of her life

when remembering was hard

she kept wandering away

we had to go somewhere

we had to go, now, now!

does it matter where?

and she wasn’t listening

[maryhall]

pretty flowers are wasted on annuals

just as you get used to having them

they must die

dogs, too, live a fraction of our lives

their kindness eats them inside-out

put them down

and those we love are gone too soon

but I linger here without them at all

I still live

[maryhall]

forgotten boy

in the back of my mind

he lingers a shadow

forgotten boy

when he says something

i can’t hear him at all

forgotten boy

i do want to remember

but it hurts too much

[maryhall]

and we are destined for failure

again and again and again

until our souls cannot forget

even in the next hundred lives

and when we meet as animals

perhaps as dogs, but i hope

we meet as mandarin ducks

i want to be the colorful male

and you the female slain by man

to be reborn as his stupid son

and see a flash of my orange

in the corner of your eyes

youll think how vaguely familiar

and boil me for dinner

when i return as your loyal dog

please spare me when i fail

you know i try my goddamn best

[maryhall]

flowers bloom

as in winter

bright colors

as the sky

aurora shines

as up north

snow falls

[maryhall]

a song sung out-of-tune

sometime in mid-june

the children play

down by the lake

the waters muddy brown

and the children dive down

note: i've writer's block right now. please be patient with me as i struggle to write anything even a little good for the next while

[maryhall]

Persephone

early spring colorful flowers blossom

sprouting from the softening earth

soft leaves of green and pink petals

daughter rests her head on mother’s lap

and they giggle about stupid things

an inside joke shared between them

new warmth courses through mother

driving away the winter’s frozen numbness

and bringing new life into cold hands

this will not last as long as they want

but they drive away the thought with

laughter as the world turns a deep green

[maryhall]

soft steps

down the hall

she leaves

her sister cries

ugly tears

by the hearth

the blaze

she doesn’t feel

instead a

winter cold settles

frosting about

her battered feet

[maryhall]

and fate laughed

the knight the princess the dragon

noose-knotted to their destinies

and strung from the balcony

the knight wanted to be a baker

his father wanted fame

the princess loved a girl

the girl laughed at the notion

the dragon longed to be vegetarian 

it was against her nature 

but fate can be fought against

as a noose can be tightened

so the knight died in battle

the princess married a man

and the dragon starved herself

[maryhall]

the house

on the hill

with eyes

that are green

like trees

in the forest

with pines

in my yard

the fence 

is so white

like teeth

at the dentist

say aaa

but don’t scream

the tv

plays old shows

like grandma

loved to watch

her favorite

was that sitcom

the dad

in the newspaper

for eating

like a horse

he runs

coat sleek brown

as mice

live two years

at max.

[maryhall]

If I were kinder,

God would love me.

But because He never loved me,

I did not grow up kind.

[maryhall]

it’s safe in my room

by the cheap heater

it’s quiet hum

and soft warmth

i will protect you

against all of nature

the sea and sky

cannot topple me

stallions can’t trample

swans can’t seduce

gods can’t shake

me from you

i can’t promise

happiness

but this winter

you can sleep

[maryhall]

the man smokes

his favorite brand

he knows it will kill him

but addiction has his heart

[maryhall]

a baby recognizes himself in the mirror

for the first time, giggling in the wild way

that babies do. he looks up to his mom

and she laughs with him, delighted,

as if she were a child again.

[maryhall]

a wolf abandoned 

too old 

to serve any purpose

snow covers her

in a downy embrace

too warm

she slips away

[maryhall]

today i took down my badge board

and my room doesn’t feel different

not that much anyway

but i'm too old for hot topic pins now

i'm too old to collect toys

and i'm too old to live with dad

i really do look for a job

i explain to no one but myself

my dad believes me

my mom believes me

my siblings believe me

i'm stuck

in a child’s bedroom

every day is summer break

and i stay in bed

to stare at the wall

today i took down my badge board

but i don’t feel like an adult at all